by Deorre, Iris
She stepped forward and looked in the mirror. It had taken her years to grow her hair to a decent length, and then the cancer had struck and she’d lost her hair. Again she’d grown it, and again the chemo had stolen her glorious locks. Even though she’d kept it short, it was beginning to fall out.
Tears gathered in her eyes.
‘Don’t you dare cry now,’ she told herself. ‘You’ve got a lot to be grateful for. It’s only hair!’ She tried to smile through the tears. Again she ran her hand through her hair and again there were clumps of it between her fingers. A ball of emotion rose up within her. She could feel it in the pit of her stomach as it rose to her chest. It heated her chest from the inside out, and there was nothing more she wanted to do than to let all the rage out! It wasn’t uncommon for her to go from one emotion to the other, and again she tried to calm herself down.
‘Stupid cancer! You can’t and won’t control me!’ She looked into the mirror. ‘I tell you what I will do.’
She stepped back towards her bed, crouched down and pulled out a hair trimmer from beneath the bed. It took her a moment to set up the appliance and step back in front of the mirror. She put it to her head, switched it on and started from the top centre all the way down. The trimmer buzzed, and hair dropped to the floor. The more she did it, the more liberated she became. It was now under her control, hair wasn’t falling off when it wanted to, she was taking it into her own hands.
Finally she switched off the clippers. She stood for a moment and gazed at herself in the mirror. A smile curled on her lips, she loved it and made last minute touches to her look. The purple lipstick did wonders against her caramel skin and the light blush gave colour to her cheeks. It gave her a young fresh look that put the leap back into her step.
After a deep breath, Sahara was ready to face the world. Breakfast would have to wait until she got into work. Life was suddenly fun again, the world had been put right again!
****
Alice walked into Sahara’s flowers, ten minutes after Sahara had arrived. She took one look at Sahara and smiled, and then walked up to her and gave her a great big hug.
‘You look amazing! You look amazing in anything. You could throw a plastic bag over yourself and you’d still look stunning!’
Sahara laughed, with some lilies in her hands. ‘I quite agree!’ she said cheekily.
‘That arrangement looks gorgeous! It’s great to see you haven’t lost your inspiration.’
‘Yes, they’re lovely.’
Sahara had started arranging the oriental lilies with the white roses. There were only two more hours before the driver would pick them up. Alice smiled at her boss, they were really like old friends, friend who understood each other.
Sahara had hired Alice after the third person she’d interviewed. They’d clicked the moment Alice had sat down. Alice had been cancer free, six years, and she understood so much of what Sahara was going through. They’d got on so well, they’d started sharing stories. Stories that inspired and encouraged rather than discouraged. Alice was the reminder that cancer could be overcome!
‘So what do you need me to do?’ asked Alice.
‘You can start on the flowers for the charity event and the phone calls. The phone has been ringing off the hook for some reason, but I haven’t have chance to answer it. I mean it’s really early.’
‘I’ll handle it.’ Alice smiled and got to work.
They worked in comfortable silence. It was like the flowers had taken over the place, taking on their own life form. It brought Sahara great peace when she worked, it kept her in the moment, and there wasn’t want or need for anything.
A few minutes after Alice had started on the charity order, the phone rang.
‘There it goes again!’ Sahara shouted.
‘I’ll deal with it.’ Alice picked up the phone. ‘Sahara’s florists, how may I help you?’
‘Finally, someone answered the phone.’ The mans voice was low, calm and collected.
‘I’m sorry we didn’t respond earlier, we have a busy day today and it’s really early in the day.’
‘Well, I thought you pride yourself on how early and how fast you can get an order done.’
‘Yes sir we do, and I’m ready to help you.’
Sahara turned to gaze at Alice a moment, Alice winked to assure her she had things under control.
‘Great. I’d like to place an order, but I’m going to need your help,’ he said.
‘Okay, I’m all ears.’ Alice held her pen ready to take instructions.
‘I’m trying to impress a lady,’ he said.
‘Okay.’ She waited
‘I’m not sure what flowers she likes.’
‘Well, just go with what you think she likes. I’m sure you’ve ordered flowers before.’
The man laughed.
‘I’m ashamed to say I’ve not. My assistant always did it for me, but this woman is very special, and I’d like to be the one who does the order.’
‘Well, she’s a lucky woman.’
‘I don’t know about that yet, I’m not sure she’ll even like me.’ He laughed lightly. ‘Anyway, I have to ask, are you the boss?’
‘Urm..no, why?’ She looked up at Sahara who had lost herself in the arrangement of the flowers.
‘Could I ask you to ask her what would be the best flowers for a woman I hardly know yet?’
‘I’m sure I can help you with that sir.’
‘I’m sure you can, but I’d just like to get her opinion if you don’t mind.’
‘Yes, of course, please hold on a second.’ Alice wasn’t sure if she was annoyed or impressed with the man. ‘Sahara.’
Sahara stopped what she was doing a moment and gazed at her assistant.
‘There is a gentleman on the phone who wishes to know what the best flowers would be for a woman he doesn’t know yet.’
‘Why don’t you tell him what your favourite flowers are?’ she asked.
‘Because he wants to know my boss’s opinion.’
‘Hmm, I see, he’s a bit cheeky isn’t he? But then again he’s a customer.’
Alice smiled.
‘Well, I’ll give him my favourite then, shall I, I mean not every woman is going to like what I like.’
‘I agree, but if you give him something, he’ll be a happy customer.’
‘Scarlet roses all the way! I’m a romantic!’
‘Yeah, those are lovely!’
‘There, he’s got his answer.’
Alice put the phone back to her ear and relayed what Sahara had said. She listened for further instruction. Just as she was about to write, she stopped a moment.
‘Urm, could you repeat that again, sir.’
She waited and took in what he’d just said. She hadn’t heard wrongly, it seemed that everything he’d said the first time was correct.
‘Are you getting any of this?’
‘Yes I am, sir.’
Sahara turned to Alice and wondered what this man wanted. Alice started to write the instructions as she listened very carefully. Next she took his credit card details, and finally thanked him for his custom.
‘Odd customer?’ asked Sahara.
‘You could say that, but I understand where he’s coming from. He’s trying to impress a lady.’ She smiled.
‘Well, I hope she’ll be impressed.’
‘Yes, I hope so too. I better get this order done.’ She left Sahara.
It didn’t take long for Sahara to be pulled back into her work. She didn’t take much notice of Alice. She was quite capable of working on her own anyway.
The van had arrived to pick up the flowers for the wedding. Sahara helped the driver with the flowers into the car. She felt happy and satisfied doing what she loved. It took her mind off things she didn’t want to think about.
When she walked back into the shop there was a great big vase of scarlet roses at her work station. The exact ones she’d told the customer, and right beside it was a card.
�
��What’s going on here?’ she asked.
‘I’m only following instructions.’ Alice beamed.
‘Okay.’ She squinted at the woman.
‘Go on, take a look inside the card.’
Sahara lifted the little card they used when deliveries were sent and read it.
I hope you like the flowers, and I hope they’ll be enough to get you to go out with me to dinner tonight. If the answer is yes, then your assistant will give you my number. I hope to hear from you.
Eugene.
She burst out laughing! She laughed and laughed until her ribs hurt.
‘What’s so funny?’ asked Alice.
‘Honestly, not much. I mean this guy, my god.’
‘So you know him?’
‘I met him briefly at Emily’s wedding. He wanted to know too much about me.’
‘What’s wrong with that?’
‘I’m not ready to let someone in.’
‘When will you be ready? Sometimes you’re ready without realising it.’
‘I don’t know, you know what my life’s like and…’ she giggled again. ‘My hair, I have no hair. He’s hardly going to think I’m stunning looking like this!’
‘You’re beautiful, with or without hair, and we both know it will grow back. I’m certain he’ll know that too, unless of course he’s that vain.’
‘I think he is. He seems the type.’
Alice sighed, she wanted to say so much, but she also knew what it felt like to be in Sahara’s position.
‘Would it be that bad, just to go out on a date with him? It isn’t a marriage proposal.’
‘Oh I know that, but it’s just… I don’t know if I even want a date.’
‘What happened to living in the now?’
‘That’s exactly what I’m doing.’
‘In other parts of your life, but you never do it with your romantic life.’
‘It’s a lot harder to do it. Life’s complicated as it is, I can’t add another person to it.’
‘Think about it at least. I really think it would be good for you.’
‘What I’m going to think about is how the hell did he get my work address.’ She thought about Myles. ‘I’m going to have a few words with Emily’s husband, we had an agreement.’
‘Don’t jump to conclusions. There could’ve been many ways he found out about you.’
‘What else does he know?’ She was terrified.
‘Don’t work yourself up about it. Just relax, get on with the day. It will sort itself out.’
‘You’re right.’ she nodded. ‘Let’s get those flowers for the charity event sorted.’
Alice nodded. And even though she started to focus on her work, Eugene had certainly taken a place in her mind. It wasn’t going to be that easy to shake him.
****
It was three o’clock and he still hadn’t heard from Sahara. It had been the first time a woman had actually not responded to him the way he’d expected. It had been so easy for him, so this had come as a bitter surprise. He walked around his big home like a lost puppy. It frustrated him that he didn’t know what she was thinking.
He’d never felt so strongly about a woman, Sahara overwhelmed him, she was all he thought about. There was something about her that drew him to her, but he didn’t know what it was. It wasn’t something tangible, something he could pinpoint. All he knew was that he wanted to be with her, and would do anything to do just that.
The day crept on, and there was still no word from her at six that evening. Eugene came to the conclusion that Sahara wasn’t as interested in him as he was in her. It was a hard thing to face, and he’d faced hard things in his life, but just knowing that he wouldn’t get a chance to be with the woman he thought was the one, hit him hard.
By six thirty he had to get out of his head. It wasn’t like him to be obsessed about a woman. The conclusion being, women rarely rejected him. He decided he would go out, get some air, perhaps call some friends, but then again, the majority of his friends had families. It wasn’t going to be easy to find someone who could go out with him at a moments notice.
He picked up his jacket that was in the hall and just as he was about to step out his mobile rang. It took a moment for him to answer. The number on the screen was unrecognisable, and at first he was suspicious it was work related.
‘Hello?’ He took the chance and answered it.
‘Hi.’ A woman’s voice responded.
‘Sahara?’
‘Yes, yes it is. I wasn’t sure I was going to call you.’
‘I’m glad you did!’ He dropped his jacket.
‘Thank you for the flowers.’
‘You’re welcome, I hope you like them.’
‘They are my favourite.’ She laughed lightly.
It had taken a lot of thought on her part to make that phone call. There had been so many things running in her mind before she’d taken the plunge. But as Alice had put it, living in the moment was all they had. Sahara knew this, and had always managed to do it except in that area of her life.
‘Don’t be afraid to try,’ Alice had said.
‘It’s not that, it’s him. I’m afraid for him. You and I both know what our lives can be like.’
‘I suggest you leave that up to him. He needs to decide what he can and cannot handle.’
Even after that, she hadn’t suddenly got the guts to give him a ring. It was only after she’d jumped into the car after a long days work that it hit her. There was really nothing to loose. Whether she rang him or not, wasn’t relevant. All she knew was that if she didn’t try, take that leap, she’d never know what might have been. It was then that she picked up the mobile, the moment she’d stopped outside her house, Sahara had dialled his number.
‘So, are you calling to say yes to the date?’ he asked.
Sahara hadn’t thought that far.
‘Urm…’
‘No pressure.’ He laughed.
‘Well, yes and no,’ she said.
There was the issue with her hair. The sudden date thing had made her self conscious. It had brought her back to the reality of the world she’d left behind.
‘Okay…’ He didn’t understand.
‘Yes, I’d like to go on a date with you,’ she said firmly as if to blow off the possibility of anything romantic. ‘No, it won’t be today.’
‘Ahh, that’s a shame, but I’m glad I’ll get to see you at some point.’
She shut her eyes a moment and listened to his low thick voice and tried to visualise his face. That alone got her heart racing!
‘Do you have an idea when you’d like to go out?’
‘Urm…maybe tomorrow?’
‘Tomorrow’s perfect.’ He was delighted. ‘Is there anything particular you’d like to do?’
‘Urm… a simple drink would do.’
‘That’s fine with me. I’m looking forward to it.’
‘Yes, me too.’ She had to admit that she was. ‘So I guess you’ll need my home address.’
‘Urm…don’t worry about that. I know exactly where you stay.’ It slipped out before he could help himself.
It took Sahara by surprise, and she wasn’t sure how to take it.
‘Urmm…Myles, yes I pressured him, please don’t be upset with him.’ He shut his eyes, knowing very well that the lie was a bad start, but he couldn’t bring himself to speaking the truth.
‘Hmmm. Fair enough,’ she said. ‘Tomorrow at two, is that okay?’
‘Two is perfect. See you then.’
‘Bye.’ She hung up.
A few seconds later she rang Emily’s number.
‘Hey, is everything okay?’ Emily asked nervously.
‘I’m fine, I’m not sick or anything,’ she said hurriedly. ‘This call is about Myles. I think you’ll have to have some words with him.’
‘Ohoh, why don’t I like the sound of that?’
Sahara gave her the brief of her call. She also pointed out how upset she was that he’d give out her inform
ation, when he knew exactly how she felt about it. She also hoped that he hadn’t mentioned that she was fighting cancer! It was hers to tell!
‘Honey, I’m so sorry, but I really don’t think Myles would do that. I know him!’
‘Well, ask him because his friend clearly told me it was him, and he asked me not to be upset with him, but I can’t help, but be upset.’
‘Okay…let me talk to him and I’ll give you a ring back. Okay?’
‘Yes, okay.’ She hung up.
It took a while for everything to sink in. Sahara took in her surroundings, and finally stepped out of the car. It had been a long day, and all she really wanted was to have a peaceful evening to herself.
****
‘Who was that honey?’ asked Myles the minute Emily got off the phone.
‘Sahara, and she’s not very happy.’
‘Why’s that?’
‘Well.’ She walked over to her husband. ‘It seems that someone has told Eugene an awful lot about her.’
‘Oh boy!’
‘I know, and the terrible part is that Eugene told her he got the information from you.’
‘He has got some nerve!’ He was furious. ‘He’ll never change!’
‘I take it you didn’t say a word.’
‘Why the hell would I?’
‘I thought that, I know you wouldn’t. Just thought you had a weak moment.’
‘I can’t believe you thought that.’
‘Honey, it isn’t a bad thing. We’re all only human.’
‘True, but I wouldn’t do that, you know I wouldn’t.’
‘Of course I do. It doesn’t change the fact Sahara’s furious.’
‘I don’t blame her. Did you tell her it wasn’t me?’
‘I did, but I also said I’d have a word with you and call her back.’
‘Well, I’m definitely going to have some words with Eugene.’
‘That sounds like a great idea. I on the other hand will give Sahara a ring back.’
He nodded and left her. He picked up his mobile from the table in the passage and called Eugene. It didn’t take long for Eugene to pick up the call.