Darcy accepted all the censure he would tolerate. Criticism of his actions was one thing; he deserved it, but Georgiana did not. “Then I suppose this conversation is at an end.” Darcy stood to show Dorchester to the door. “Your disdain is noted, Sir, but I am not of the habit of being told to whom I may offer my friendship. Mr. Harrison always treats my family with respect, and I return it gratefully.” By now, Darcy held the door open for Dorchester.
“Well!” Dorchester huffed, as he quickly exited the room and the house.
Darcy growled,“Insufferable poppycock!”
“I am sorry, Fitzwilliam,” Georgiana sobbed.
He crossed the room, taking her hand and pulling his sister to her feet. Darcy encircled her with his arms, clutching her to his chest. “We will have no more words of apology, Georgiana,” he whispered.
Georgiana moaned, “I should have never gone without a chaperone.”
“Did you do anything of which you should be ashamed?”
She gasped,“No, Fitzwilliam—never!”
“Then it is done; I cannot criticize you for I did so much worse.” Darcy buried his face in her hair.
“Elizabeth will be ecstatic to have you home.” Georgiana kissed the side of his cheek.
“Will she?” Darcy’s voice held his worry.
“I have not changed my opinion,” she assured her brother. “You and Elizabeth have a great love; you simply must find each other again.”
“I pray you are correct, my Dearest One.” He kissed her hand. “Now, come sit with me and honestly tell me about your day.”
From the time the Darcys severed their connection with the Dorchesters, a week passed. Darcy and Georgiana continued to attend art displays, concerts, and the theatre.They enjoyed the company of several of Darcy’s friends from his university days. He claimed an allegiance of those he knew for many years. He abandoned the “show” much of the ton regularly displayed. He secured his position in society, but Darcy shunned the frivolity found by the Dorchesters and others of lesser consequence.
Shamefaced, Darcy made a trip to the Gardiner home in Cheapside. Surprisingly, they greeted him with all civilities. While there, he spoke to Elizabeth’s aunt and uncle about his undying love for their niece. He tried to explain to them his confusion after his return from Hull, and they related his transformation to the one he took before. Darcy assured them he would return to Elizabeth and Pemberley soon.The Gardiners knew him to be a man of his word and realized how much it cost such a proud man to confess his weaknesses. He left them with an invitation to Pemberley before Elizabeth’s lying in.
During the week, both he and Georgiana received letters from Elizabeth. They were simple, loaded with news of the estate. He hoped for words of affection from her, but Elizabeth offered very little in her correspondence. Darcy did not blame her; he treated her badly. He offered his wife moments of tenderness, and then he turned on her and boldly judged his Elizabeth by standards he no longer considered important. If he could earn her forgiveness, Darcy would cherish her forever.
Colonel Fitzwilliam came to Kensington Place, hoping to spend the night before traveling on to Bath. “Darcy, it is good to see you,” Edward laughed lightly upon seeing Darcy’s drawn expression.
“You are to Bath?” Darcy asked as he poured his cousin a drink.
“Anne awaits my arrival; then we will return to Rosings.” Edward gladly took the drink. “You seem less than pleased to be here, Darcy,” Edward noted out loud.
“My return to Pemberley cannot come soon enough.” Darcy held the glass to his lips but did not drink.
Edward knew Darcy’s nature better than anyone. “Has not your time been well spent?”
“This was a foolish consideration; Georgiana fared well, but she still prefers the attentions of Mr. Harrison to all others.” Darcy’s countenance softened when he spoke of his sister. “And I am of the belief she should experience love; I will not force my sister into an arranged marriage.”
Edward asked,“Is Mr. Harrison not a legitimate suitor?”
“Mr. Harrison’s value increases each time I take his worth. I am not ready to part with Georgiana, but I can accept it when she makes her choice.” Darcy seemed more at ease with his recipience.
“And what of your wife?” Edward cautiously approached the subject.
“Elizabeth’s regard may be lost forever. I was quite foolish; in my rush to create a world of opportunities for my sister, I neglected my wife.”
Edward took note of his cousin’s self-censure. “Then the rumors my parents share are true?”
Darcy’s head snapped up in shock.“What rumors, pray tell!”
“My father writes you replaced Mrs. Darcy with Miss McFarland.” Edward leaned forward in his seat as if sharing a secret.
Darcy moaned and buried his face in his hands.“What have I done to my wife? I tried to replace my feelings for Elizabeth with the approval of fine society. Miss McFarland assumed I would return her regard, but I cannot get the image of Mrs. Darcy out of my mind. She is perfect for Pemberley.”
“Elizabeth is perfect for you,” Edward added quickly.
Darcy laughed lightly.“So, I am finding out.”
“Then what will you do, Cousin?” Edward seemed serious.
“I plan to stay in London for at least a fortnight. I must check the spread of rumors, which might hurt Mrs. Darcy. If I leave now, busy tongues could destroy Elizabeth’s reputation. She does not deserve such censure.” Darcy laid out his plan.
“It is appropriate to protect your wife, Fitz,” Edward added quickly. “Have you considered letting Mrs. Darcy know you plan to return home to her?”
Darcy’s remorse returned.“I know not what to say to her.”
“Tell her of your regard—tell her of your dreams for the two of you. Let Mrs. Darcy know the pledge of your love. I fear, Fitz, if my parents heard the rumors so has Elizabeth.”
“How do I tell her of my chagrin?”
“Speak from your heart; Elizabeth will believe you.”
Darcy nodded, accepting his cousin’s advice.“Will you take a letter to Pemberley for me before you go to Bath?”
“It would be my pleasure, Fitz,” Edward added with a sigh of relief.
Late in the evening, Darcy sat at the desk in his sitting room. Several wadded papers lay on the floor, not having made it into the lips of the flame of the fireplace. Darcy knew not what to say to his wife.
7 May
My dearest Elizabeth,
I sit at this desk surrounded by the finest things money may buy, but I have nothing of value around me for you, my dearest, loveliest Elizabeth, are not with me, and I wish more than anything I could see you now. I am embarrassed by my loneliness, for I should be complete; yet, a void exists which only your love can fill.
If you forgive me for my foolishness, I will be the happiest of men for my love for you is as strong as ever. I love how I can spend the day with you and still want more of your time. I love the raise of an eyebrow or an enigmatic smile when I say something challenging. I love the smell of lavender as it clings to my clothes long after I leave your embrace.
Georgiana and I return to Pemberley in a fortnight. Please send me word that you, my Dearest, will think kindly of me until I come home to you. I am yours as always, my Lizzy.
F.D.
Darcy sealed the letter, hoping it would change the course of his relationship with Elizabeth. His cousin’s words echoed in his head as he crawled into bed and welcomed dreams of Elizabeth to his sleep. “Do not let your past dictate who you are. Instead, let it be the foundation, cousin, of whom you will become. Be Fitzwilliam Darcy, Master of Pemberley.”
Colonel Fitzwilliam rode his mount into the carriageway at Pemberley. He half expected either Elizabeth or Kitty to greet him, but other than Darcy’s servants, no one appeared. He supposed the ladies to be making tenant visits or to be in Lambton. Upon entering the house, the colonel found only Mrs. Reynolds in attendance.
“Colo
nel, Sir,” she fussed about, hurrying servants to their stations,“Mr. Darcy and Miss Georgiana are still in London.”
The colonel handed her his coat and hat. “I am aware of that, Mrs. Reynolds. I stayed at Kensington Place on my way here.” Looking around casually, he asked, “Where are Mrs. Darcy and Miss Bennet?”
He headed toward the drawing room, expecting someone there to receive him. Mrs. Reynolds’s words stopped his progress.“Neither Mrs. Darcy nor Miss Bennet are at Pemberley, Sir.”
The colonel turned quickly, unsure he heard her correctly. “What do you mean neither is here?”
Mrs. Reynolds fidgeted with her apron, smoothing it down. “Mrs. Bennet reportedly took ill; Miss Bennet was called home nearly a fortnight ago. A week later, Mrs. Darcy followed her sister.”
“Mrs. Darcy has been gone for over a week, and no one cared to inform Mr. Darcy?” His voice was incredulous.
“Mrs. Darcy posted a letter to Master Fitzwilliam the day she left. I assumed she informed him of her whereabouts.” Mrs. Reynolds was uncomfortable; her suspicions seemed more accurate than before. “Colonel Fitzwilliam,” she stammered, “there is something else not quite right.”
“Tell me now, Mrs. Reynolds,” the colonel urged.
The housekeeper lowered her voice and stepped in closer to maintain secrecy.“The day before Mrs. Darcy sent her sister to Longbourn, she locked the master’s study and gave orders no one should enter the room until Master Fitzwilliam returned home. Mrs. Darcy loved to sit in the master’s chair when he was away at Hull and even when he was in London, and then suddenly Mrs. Darcy refused to go into the room or let anyone else enter. Something is not right, Colonel.”
“I agree, Mrs. Reynolds; get me the key immediately,” he demanded.
The housekeeper dropped him a quick curtsy and disappeared. The colonel let out an expletive as he paced the hallway. When Mrs. Reynolds returned with the room key, he entered the study, closing the door behind him, not allowing anyone else access. It took him only seconds to find the incriminating letter; Elizabeth left it lying open on Darcy’s desk. Edward read it and cursed again. Why would Miss McFarland send such a letter? Even if it were true, the note was an act of impropriety, one a lady of the ton would not write. Poor Elizabeth! She must be devastated. The letter obviously had the reaction Miss McFarland wanted. Edward knew he had to contact his cousin; Darcy must go to Longbourn.The colonel was smart enough to make sure he had all the details before he contacted Darcy. First, he checked the house; Elizabeth left much of the things she accumulated since marrying Darcy. From what Edward could tell, she took nothing with her, which had not once belonged to her.Then he rode into Lambton to speak to Mr. Ashford. The man would know where Miss Bennet could be found.
“Miss Bennet has not written for several days,” Mr. Ashford confided. “She arrived at Longbourn in a timely manner; they were awaiting Mrs. Darcy’s arrival at Mr. Bingley’s estate.”
“If Mrs. Bennet is ill, why would Mrs. Darcy travel to Netherfield?” Edward questioned.
Mr. Ashford looked away uncomfortably. “You must know by now, Colonel, Mrs. Darcy left for personal reasons. She sent Miss Bennet away because Mr. Darcy would not approve of her being here.” Ashford cleared his throat before going on. “I drafted a letter to Mr. Darcy requesting a release from my living. I love Miss Bennet, and I will not abandon her.”The last words were the closest thing the clergyman could offer in the form of a condemnation for his benefactor.
“Do not do anything hastily, Mr. Ashford; perhaps a solution is still at hand,” the colonel cautioned.“I must contact Mr. Darcy.”
Edward returned to the house. He drafted a letter to Darcy, enclosing the damaging letter from Miss McFarland, before sending one of the Pemberley staff riding for London. He sent another letter to Anne in Bath, telling her his arrival would be delayed for a few days. He offered her no explanation except Darcy needed him at Pemberley.
When his man delivered the letter from his cousin, Darcy’s heart sank, knowing something must be amiss. He rushed to his study; with trembling hands, he broke the seal.
9 May
Darcy,
I will make this as short as possible for I know when you receive it you will want to be on the road immediately. Neither Mrs. Darcy nor Miss Bennet is at Pemberley.The enclosed letter will explain their departure. I confirmed with Mr.Ashford Miss Bennet is at Longbourn. Elizabeth left on 30 April for Netherfield. Mrs. Bennet will not welcome your wife in disgrace. Hurry, Darcy, you must go to Elizabeth before the riff is too wide to bring you two together again.
E. F.
Darcy nearly ripped apart the other page. A curse escaped his lips as he read the letter Miss McFarland sent to Pemberley.“She knew I was not there,” he said to himself.“Poor Elizabeth! How will I make her forgive me?” He rushed from the room, handing Georgiana the letters as he passed her in the hall. Darcy ordered his carriage and sent Henry scrambling to pack his bags.Within the hour, he was on the road to Hertfordshire.
When he called at Netherfield, Mr. Bingley, although surprised to see him, welcomed Darcy with all civility. “Darcy,” Bingley offered the familiar greeting,“it is pleasant to have you here.”
“Mr. Bingley.” Darcy gave him a proper bow. “I am sorry to come to Netherfield unannounced; I wish to speak to Mrs. Darcy.”
Bingley looked at his old friend in astonishment. “I am afraid, Sir, that is impossible; your wife is not here.”
“Is Mrs. Darcy with her parents? I understood Mrs. Bennet refused Elizabeth because of a misunderstanding.That is why I came here; the reason for Mrs. Darcy to come to Hertfordshire does not exist.” Darcy’s confusion was obvious.
“Mrs. Darcy has not arrived; we expected her earlier in the week, but my Jane received a post yesterday saying your wife was delayed at Pemberley.” Bingley became anxious.
Darcy’s own agitation consumed him. “I assure you, Mr. Bingley, Mrs. Darcy is not at our home; Colonel Fitzwilliam is there.”
“Let me get you a drink, Darcy.” Bingley indicated a nearby chair. “I will ask Mrs. Bingley to join us, and I will send my carriage to Longbourn for Kitty.”
Darcy accepted the seat to which Bingley indicated. “Thank you, Mr. Bingley; it seems I owe you much.”
Bingley acknowledged Darcy’s comments with a nod of the head before exiting to find Jane Bingley. Darcy sat back in the chair and closed his eyes. Stepping into Netherfield brought him multiple images of Elizabeth; just turning his head, he could see her standing in a doorway or on the top of a staircase or walking in the garden. It made him want her even more than before, and he feared he let their love slip through his fingers.
“Mrs. Bingley.” He stood in acknowledgment when Jane entered.
“Mr. Darcy.” She dropped a curtsy and then gestured toward the chair once more. As she seated herself across from him, she added,“Mr. Bingley tells me you thought Lizzy to be here.”
“Colonel Fitzwilliam is at Pemberley. Mrs. Reynolds says Mrs. Darcy left the estate nine days ago.” Darcy filled her in with what he knew.
“My sister wrote she was delayed at the estate.What can this mean, Mr. Darcy?” Jane wrung her hands.
“Mrs. Bingley, I wish I knew.”
“Do you know why Lizzy left, Mr. Darcy?” Accusations were evident.
“Mrs. Bingley, I admit to allowing myself to appear to change my affections for your sister, but it is all a misunderstanding. I kept company with people whom I thought would advance my sister’s position in society; little did I know I would become the victim of some sick game, which, unfortunately, hurt Elizabeth. Yet, I swear to you, Mrs. Bingley, there is no truth to what your sister believes.”
“I pray you speak the truth, Mr. Darcy.”
“You know me well enough, Mrs. Bingley, to know I abhor every form of deception; I speak the truth when I say I want your sister in my life.” Darcy tried to convince her.
Jane offered a reprimand. “You do not deserve Lizzy, Mr. Darcy.”
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Darcy dropped his eyes; he paused with the realization of the truth of Jane Bingley’s words. “You are right, Mrs. Bingley, but I want her, and I want for nothing.”
“I am pleased to hear it.Then let us find Elizabeth as soon as possible.”
Kitty Bennet had little to add to what they already knew. She expected Elizabeth to follow within the week. Hearing how carefully Elizabeth planned their departure told Darcy finding his wife would be more difficult than he first expected.
“Mr. Darcy.” Kitty faced him. “You once told me kissing Lizzy was like coming home.Then how could you hurt her so badly?”
“I thoroughly deserve your censure, Miss Bennet, but please help me find Elizabeth,” Darcy pleaded with her.
“Elizabeth not only knew of that scandalous letter from Miss McFarland, she had letters from your own sister describing your constant company with the lady and a description of your confrontation with our uncle at the theatre.” Darcy flinched with the knowledge his actions created this chaos. “Add to that Lizzy’s hearing your conversation with the good colonel about your desire to send my sister away after her delivering your heir.”
“I never said any such thing!” he protested, but then Darcy realized what Elizabeth must have heard.“I supposedly had this conversation with my cousin?”
“That is what Lizzy disclosed to me.”
“I swear the conversation had nothing to do with your sister. It dealt with Lord Suterland’s affair with Lady Midland.” Darcy now understood everything. “Mrs. Darcy was deceived, and she deceived herself. I must find her, Miss Bennet, before Elizabeth does something foolish.”
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