CHAPTER 24
“Nothing is more deceitful than the appearance of humility.
It is often only carelessness of opinion, and sometimes an indirect
boast.”
Jane Austen, Mansfield Park, 1814
Darcy reluctantly spent the night at Netherfield Park, but civilities did not come easy to him. He retired to the guest room early, still haunted by thoughts of Elizabeth in this house. He departed for Pemberley at the crack of dawn. By the time he arrived at his estate, Elizabeth had been gone for nearly a fortnight. How could he find her after such a long time? Where could he begin to look?
“Darcy, I am glad you are here. I found out Mrs. Darcy told the coachman her mother went to Bath for the medicinal waters. He left her there.” Edward greeted his cousin with the news.
“Could she still be there? It has been eleven days. Elizabeth must have planned her disappearance for some time.” Darcy paced the room.
Edward looked frustrated.“I know not who else to ask.”
“As early as possible, I will be off to Bath,” Darcy thought out loud.“At least, it is a beginning.”
“Hannah reports Mrs. Darcy took few personal belongings. From what I know, it appears Elizabeth took none of Lady Anne’s jewelry or other gifts.”
Darcy set his jaw line.“Elizabeth never wanted the jewels. It is not in her nature. Edward, I think I will see if I can find any clues in Elizabeth’s rooms; I will join you after for dinner.”
Edward was right; few things were missing from his wife’s room. Frustrated, he forced himself into their shared sitting room. Walking to the mantel, he rested his head on his arm while drinking in heat of the dying embers. “Elizabeth,” he whispered her name. “Why did you do this?” Looking up at last, he saw the corner of the letter, his initials clearly in the familiar flourish of his wife’s script. Darcy grabbed the letter and took it over to the light to read.
His wife’s words rushed through him. Elizabeth loved him enough to leave him because she thought him unhappy with her. She also feared his wrath. What had he done to her that Elizabeth would so fear and distrust him? What kind of husband was he to her? Darcy thought of their child—a child he would never know—never hold. Evidently, from what Kitty told him, Elizabeth thought he meant to send her away after the child was born. Contempt filled his heart as he wandered aimlessly to the nursery designed for their child.Walking to the window, in the dying light of the day, he could clearly see the field of wildflowers Elizabeth started especially to give him pleasure. Fully in bloom, the blossoms danced as the breeze rustled the growing stems. Tears misted his eyes as he grieved for what he lost. Somehow he must find her before she disappeared from his life forever.
A late post arrived from Georgiana, and Darcy for a few minutes considered not opening it. The posts brought him nothing but pain of late, and he knew he had no news, which Georgiana would want to receive in return.
11 May
Fitzwilliam,
I hope this letter finds you and my sister reunited, but I fear the worst.After reading the letters you left in my hands as you rushed to Netherfield, I remembered a conversation I had with Mr. Harrison about Elizabeth. She confided some of her fears to him. Our conversation included no specifics, but I suspected he knew more of her departure than he disclosed at the time.
Knowing I could not contact Mr. Harrison myself, I took the carriage to see Mr. Gardiner. I could think of no one else I could trust with this information, which would not bring disgrace upon Elizabeth. Mr. Gardiner sent a dispatch to Mr. Harrison begging for his help.
Mr. Harrison’s return post says Elizabeth plans to take passage to America. He gave her the names of reliable captains and vessels sailing out of both Bristol and Liverpool. Find her, Fitzwilliam, before we lose her.
G. D.
Darcy nearly sank to his knees in defeat. “What if Elizabeth took passage already?” he asked as he turned to Edward, who sat reading Georgiana’s letter. “She is alone; how will she survive the birth of our child?”
“Mrs. Darcy will not risk losing the child, Fitzwilliam,” Edward assured him. “At least, we know Elizabeth is going to Bristol; otherwise, she would not go to Bath.”
“Maybe she wants us to believe her in Bristol; Elizabeth could take a public conveyance to Liverpool,” Darcy reasoned. “My wife went to a lot of trouble to disappear completely.”
“Then what do you propose we do, Fitz?”
However, before Darcy could answer, a maid announced Mr. Bingley’s arrival.
“Darcy.” Bingley greeted him with a quick bow before turning to the colonel. “Colonel Fitzwilliam, I am pleased to see you.”
“Welcome, Mr. Bingley,” Edward stammered.
“I am sorry, Darcy,” Bingley returned his attention to his old friend,“to come unannounced, but Mrs. Bingley insisted I follow you to Pemberley to help find Mrs. Darcy. Jane worries for her sister’s safety and demands my participation in her recovery.”
Darcy actually looked relieved. “We welcome your help, Bingley.” Darcy forced himself to return to the familiarity of his former friend’s name, hoping to resume Mr. Bingley’s devotion.
“Have a seat. Let me order you some refreshments, and then we can map out a plan to recover my wife.” Darcy knew Bingley to be a man he could trust.
They decided Bingley would travel to Liverpool; he would check the bill of lading for ships leaving for the Americas. Bingley would pay special attention to single women taking passage. Elizabeth had Hero with her; they knew not whether she planned to take the dog aboard ship, but it would be a clue. Colonel Fitzwilliam would do the same thing in Bristol. Darcy would go to Bath to see if Elizabeth waited there before departing to the seaport.
Elizabeth hated sitting around at the inn she chose, but she had little choice. She could not be seen out and about in Bath. She had been there five days; by now, it was likely Darcy knew of her leaving Pemberley. She knew not whether he would follow her. Part of her wished her husband would come for her—to love her once again. Yet, another part of Elizabeth hoped he would let her go in peace.
Another week passed, and although Elizabeth often looked over her shoulder expecting Darcy to appear around every corner, she saw no news in the society pages of his arrival in Bath. If she could go undetected for another week, she could travel to Bristol and leave England, her homeland, forever.
The inn she chose was a small economical one on a less-traveled road; she paid for the room in advance, and the innkeeper showed deference for Elizabeth’s wishes. She and Hero walked along the back streets each day. Knowing England would soon be behind her, Elizabeth relished the little pleasures she observed, etching the memories on her mind. Her condition allowed her a certain amount of anonymity.The citizens of the area accepted her as a married woman of some consequence and allowed Elizabeth the freedom to move among them as she always did with strangers.Within days of her arrival in Bath, the locals greeted Elizabeth and sought her out for conversation. She could almost picture herself living here among these people if she did not fear Darcy would find her.
Darcy had been in Bath for three days, but he found no trace of Elizabeth. Systematically, he checked each inn in hopes she had been there or, better yet, was still there. However, all his inquires were for naught. No one knew of an Elizabeth Darcy nor was there a married woman with child. He spent time among those taking the waters, searching the crowd for Elizabeth’s face. Knowing his wife’s propensity for long walks, Darcy searched the parks, but he discovered no signs of her.
Finally, inquiries among the public cab drivers gave him a lead. For a fee, one of the drivers remembered taking a lady who fit Elizabeth’s description to a secluded inn on the outskirts of Bath. Darcy, sitting in the comfort of his carriage, prayed his wife might still be there.
The area reminded Darcy of Lambton or Meryton, and he realized he should have looked here first; Elizabeth would not choose a high-level inn, one costing a premium. It was not in her nature.These wer
e simple shopkeepers, the type of people who would appreciate Elizabeth’s true worth.
So, it did not totally surprise Darcy to see her walking along one of the side streets, Hero nipping at her heels. He tapped on the roof of the carriage, indicating he wanted the driver to stop. Disembarking, he began to follow her at some distance, fascinated at how shopkeepers stepped to the street to speak to Elizabeth and engage her in simple conversation. She was the type of person anyone would want to meet and to know.
Nearly upon her, Darcy paused with the pleasure of watching his wife work her magic on complete strangers. Hero must have caught his scent for the dog scurried away from Elizabeth and rushed to greet Darcy. The animal jumped up on his leg, and Darcy reached out automatically to pat its head, but he never took his eyes off of his wife’s retreating form.
Elizabeth realized Hero lagged behind, and she turned to call the animal to her.When her eyes took in Darcy’s form, she froze, swallowing hard. For a fleeting moment, she considered running, but the futility of such an action, especially in her condition, brought a light chuckle to her being.
“I assume, Mrs. Darcy,” Darcy’s voice played softly through the air,“you find something amusing about our situation.”
“Do you not think it would amuse the members of the ton to know the great Fitzwilliam Darcy had to search out his wife among the shopkeepers of Bath?” Elizabeth refused his intimidating stance.
Darcy stepped closer to her, holding Elizabeth’s eyes locked with his. “If it may ease your mind, Mrs. Darcy, your husband cares not for what amuses the ton.” He took Elizabeth’s hand and placed it on his arm. “It seems we need to talk, Elizabeth. Would you care to show me where you are staying?”
She did not know how to judge her husband’s demeanor; he could be performing for those who watched their interactions from shop windows and street corners. Of course, it did not matter. She was his wife, his property; she had no legal rights so she accepted his arm and led him back toward the inn. “Come, Hero,” she called as they took steps toward their future.
At the inn she introduced Darcy to the innkeeper as her husband. The proprietor was surprised his roomer came from such an obviously privileged family. “Your wife quickly became a favorite among the locals,” the innkeeper told Darcy as a form of respect.
“My wife is an amazing woman,” Darcy spoke evenly. “Now, if you will excuse us.”
“Certainly, Mr. Darcy,” the man bowed deeply.
Darcy followed Elizabeth up the narrow steps to the room she let. When he closed the door behind them, Elizabeth expected him to attack her verbally, or even physically, for her deceit. She turned to face him, waiting for the other shoe to drop.
Darcy looked at her, turmoil playing across his face. “Elizabeth,” he said so softly she could barely hear him.
“Yes, Fitzwilliam.” She turned a cold stare on him. “You have something you wish to say to me?” She knew he won; she would have to return to Pemberley with him. Once she delivered his child, she would be out of his life, but she would not let him see how much the loss of his love would affect her.
Darcy saw her defiance, and although he wanted to lambaste her for what she tried to do to him, he could not fight the impulse to take her into his arms. In a second he was across the room and encircling her in a tight embrace.“Please forgive me,” he whispered into her ear as he pulled Elizabeth next to him. His closeness soothed her anxiety for a moment. “Forgive me, Elizabeth,” he whispered again.“I never meant to hurt you.”
Darcy’s closeness nearly undid her resolve; she hungered for his touch for so long Elizabeth clung to him without thinking. Eventually, though, reality crept in to her desire for him, and Elizabeth pushed away and walked toward the fireplace. “For what am I to offer absolution, Fitzwilliam?”
He looked at her in benign amusement. “I am a foolish man, Mrs. Darcy.” For some reason, Darcy thought he should be offering more penance, but the manner in which Elizabeth spoke told him she was as confused as he.
“How foolish, Mr. Darcy?” she offered him a bit of a challenge in her voice.
He gave her a start of a smile. “Unfortunately, very foolish, Madam.”
“Foolish enough to criticize your wife’s family connections?” Elizabeth placed her hands on her hips and tried to look angry.
Darcy took a step toward her.“Guilty as charged.”
“Foolish enough to consider your wife a complete wanton?” Her angry look began to fade.
“May I claim temporary insanity?” Once more he stepped toward her, a look of desire in his eyes.
“Foolish enough to leave your wife at Pemberley and to go off to London?” Her voice held more contempt than before.
“Guilty again.” Darcy reached out and grabbed her hand. Elizabeth resisted, but he held strong.
“Foolish enough to consider sending your wife away and taking up with another woman?” Tears stung the corners of Elizabeth’s eyes, and her lip trembled, but she refused to back down from him.
“I am afraid on those counts I must plead not guilty,” he said evenly.“Just foolishness again.”
Elizabeth reacted with disappointment for she thought he lied to her. She turned away from him. “Do you expect me to believe you?”
Darcy knew he must convince her immediately before the mood changed. “Elizabeth, you know me better than I even know myself sometimes, and you above all people know I abhor deceit of any kind; I do not lie to you.You heard Edward and me discussing Lord Suterland and Lady Midland’s affair. I never thought of sending you away. As far as my relationships in London, I foolishly aligned myself with people I thought would aid my sister’s presentation, but I never offered Miss McFarland any regard. In fact when she approached me, I told the lady you own my heart.”
Darcy saw her face soften some. “Then why did she send that letter?”
“That part, I cannot answer, but as soon as I realized her intentions, I severed all connections with the woman and her cousins.” He reached out and lightly stroked her jaw line with his fingertips.“I love only you, Elizabeth; please believe me.”
Elizabeth’s lip quivered again.“I am afraid,” she said at last.
“How afraid?” He smiled as he saw her close her eyes to his touch.
“Very afraid,” Elizabeth gasped at the intimacy Darcy offered.
“Afraid enough to pretend to be attending to your sick mother while hiding out here?” Darcy began to tease her.
“Guilty,” she smiled.
“Afraid enough to try to go to America to escape your husband’s foolish nature?” He pulled her closer.
Elizabeth actually blushed this time.“Guilty again.”
“Afraid enough to take five hundred pounds from the household accounts?” Darcy cupped her face in his hands.
“An early wedding present for my sister and Mr. Ashford.” Elizabeth indicated her receptivity with a tilt of her head, moving close enough to feel his breath on her cheek. Darcy could stand it no longer; he captured her mouth with his.
“I will offer you absolution if you can see your way to forgive me,” Darcy whispered to her again. “We are both far from perfect, but Edward says you are perfect for me.”
“What do you say, Mr. Darcy?” Elizabeth brushed his lips with hers.
“I say, my Love, we lost some common memories, but we still share common places in our hearts.You promised I would be happy at Pemberley; you did not mean without you there, too. How can I be happy without you, Lizzy?” Darcy pulled her closer to him.“I admit there are elements of the ridiculous about you, my Love.” He kissed her deeply. “However, I found my romance does not need a thing but you.” Darcy laid her across the bed.
“Yet, Mr. Darcy, you do not seem inclined to act upon it.” Elizabeth’s teasing struck a cord.
“I suppose as your husband I should punish you for trying to leave me.” Darcy’s hand ran up the length of her body.
Elizabeth remained still, trying not to react to him.“Do you th
ink, Mr. Darcy,” her voice becoming breathy, “I might consider finding myself in a bed with you to be a punishment? If so, please exercise your husbandly rights anytime you wish.”
Darcy kissed her tenderly, letting his lips linger next to hers. “Am I to assume, my Wife, I am forgiven?”
“I do not know, Fitzwilliam; forgive is a mighty powerful word. May I wait until I see how severe my punishment might be for trying to deceive you? If the punishment turns out to be as exquisite as I recall, I may have to consider disobeying you more often.”
Darcy laughed.“You have no idea how much I missed you.” His hands began to search the curves of her body. “And you, Mrs. Darcy, promised before God to love, honor, and obey me.”
Elizabeth instinctively slid her arms around his neck and pulled Darcy to her; she kissed him deeply. They both found their breathing shallow, and a heat flushed her cheeks. As she spoke again, Darcy scattered light kisses about her face. “My connections have not improved,” Elizabeth said after swallowing hard,“and when it comes to you, Mr. Darcy, I am afraid my wanton tendencies are out of control.”
By now, Darcy was lost to loving her. “I am counting on it, Lizzy.”
“Ah, that is not fair.” She slid her hands under his waistcoat to caress the muscles of his back.“You know I cannot resist you when you call me Lizzy.”
Darcy’s smile totally encompassed her. “I am counting on that fact, too, Lizzy.” The kisses came faster and with more passion than either of them could remember.
An hour later, spent in each other’s arms, Darcy stroked her cheek with the back of his hand.“Elizabeth, you are never to try to leave me again.” He used his best Master of Pemberley voice.
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