Blaire stands from the couch. “I’ll just go. No need to intrude anymore.”
I meet her eyes before she can slip away. “Thanks, Blaire.”
She gives me a soft smile. “My pleasure.” Then she points to Ava and mouths, “If you hurt her, I’ll chop your balls off,” before turning and sauntering out the door.
I have to suppress a laugh. She doesn’t have anything to worry about. The last thing I’d ever want to do is hurt Ava.
Not having to hide my feelings for Ava is a fucking relief. I can touch her and kiss her whenever I want. The first few times I kiss her in front of Eli, she stiffens for a second. But every time, Eli joins the hug by squeezing our legs, then asks to be picked up to give Ava a kiss on the cheek too.
Little man’s going to be a lady-killer when he grows up. I can already tell. With those blue eyes and that sweet smile, they’ll be throwing themselves at him.
Better make sure he knows about the birds and the bees and the importance of condoms from early on.
Thank Christ we have a few years before that’s an issue.
Even though Ava relaxes more over the next week after our Denver shows and while we stick around for a few days before moving on to our next location, it’s not until we have another long day over a week later with a sound check, a fan club activity, and a dinner at the arena that anyone besides Eli and Blaire sees Ava and I together. The guys and I don’t spend as much time together on this tour as we did last time. A combination of having other people along and knowing how sick of each other we were by the end of the last tour has us pacing ourselves.
When Ava arrives with Eli, I waste no time moving to greet her. Picking up Eli and giving him a quick hug, then shifting him to one arm so I can wrap my other around Ava and kiss her.
Pulling back, I see Ava’s eyes are as wide and round as dinner plates, and I become aware of the silence that’s fallen over the room.
Then one of the guys lets out an ear-splitting whistle and starts a slow clap. The others join in. “Fucking finally,” says Mason in a voice that sounds like it’s supposed to be under his breath, but carries clearly over the clapping and catcalls.
I turn, keeping Ava and her fire engine red cheeks behind me, and she buries her face between my shoulder blades. Even though I wish she weren’t embarrassed, I’m glad she feels safe hiding behind me. I make a quashing motion with my free hand. “Yeah, yeah. Calm your tits. Don’t embarrass my girl. She’s kinda shy.”
Blaire just grins and reaches over to smack Mason on the back of the head. “Enough. Don’t be a dick.” She pinches Aaron’s shoulder, and he turns and gives her a dirty look. She returns it, and ups the ante by flipping him off. Then they both start laughing.
Reaching behind me, I wrap my fingers around Ava’s and lead her around the table in the center of the room heaped with food to a free spot on the couch in the corner of the room. I settle her with Eli and give her another quick kiss. “Ignore them. They’re just happy for us. They’ll get used to it and calm down soon, okay?”
Her cheeks are still pink, but she nods. “Okay.”
“What can I get you?”
She sets her hands on either side of her legs. “I can get my own food.”
I shake my head. “Let me. What do you want?”
She leans around to look past me to decide what she wants. A few minutes later, I come back with two plates, one for her and one for Eli, then return to get my own.
Marcus grabs a plate after me, following me down the table to get his food as well. “So you and Ava, huh?”
“Yup.”
“I wondered.”
I shoot him a look. “Is that gonna be a problem for you?”
He shakes his head, scooping some rice onto his plate. “Nope. Good for you, man.”
And just like that, any remaining tension I was worried about is gone. I didn’t think anyone would give a crap, and if they did, it wouldn’t matter. Except for Marcus. I care about his opinion.
As I finish piling food on my plate, he bumps my shoulder with his and pauses before rejoining Kendra where she’s already digging into her own dinner and chatting with Blaire. “Don’t fuck it up, though.” And with that, he walks away.
I smirk, amused that he’s the second person to warn me against hurting Ava. And weirdly pleased that two of the people I care about most in the world are already more concerned about her wellbeing than mine.
Chapter Thirty-Six
Ava
Once my initial embarrassment subsides from everyone’s reaction when Danny greeted me with a kiss, everything returns to normal. Well, mostly normal. Instead of staring at me the entire time I’m at dinner, Danny sits next to me. Helps Eli with his food, cutting his chicken into bites, making sure he eats enough. And making sure I eat enough.
Who would’ve guessed that Mr. Frowny Face was a protective nurturer?
Not me when I first met him.
He’s not really Mr. Frowny Face anymore, though. When did that change happen? It’s so gradual I didn’t even notice. Or maybe I thought it was just with me.
But Blaire mentioned she’s noticed him smiling more. And since I told him last week that we didn’t have to keep things a secret anymore, the lingering tension in the set of his shoulders and the ticking muscles of his jaw has eased.
Maybe he’s right. Maybe us being together and open about our relationship is a good thing. For all of us.
I know it’s a relief for me not to feel like I’m lying to everyone anymore. It’s been so long since I’ve been able to just be myself and not worry about what anyone is thinking. In fact, I don’t think I’ve ever felt completely free to just be myself and not worry about fitting into a mold created for me by someone else.
The only hangup is my parents. They still don’t know anything that’s happened. I’ve been avoiding their calls a lot since we’ve been on tour, because I’m so sick of lying, especially now that I’m not lying to anyone else. But I don’t know how to tell them the truth. I finally talked to them this morning. They called while Danny was gone and I was watching Eli, so that made the perfect excuse to keep our conversation short.
Even so, I almost blurted everything out. After talking to Blaire yesterday, finally confiding in someone all the sordid details of my life over the last year and a half, I just want to let it all go. All the secrets. All the lies.
I glance at Danny, wondering how he’ll react when I finally tell him everything. I don’t want to. But I’m sure whenever I manage to work up the courage to tell my parents, I’ll end up telling him too.
Will Danny be pissed? And if so, will the anger be directed at me or will he just be angry on my behalf? Blaire was pissed at what happened to me, but she didn’t blame me for anything.
But Danny’s a guy, so his reaction is harder to predict. Somehow I doubt he’ll enjoy hearing about me being seduced and impregnated by some other asshole.
Smirking at how easily the curse word rolls through my thoughts, I pick at my food and force myself to take a bite. My stomach’s been unsettled all day. Eli’s had a cold and upset stomach for the last few days, though he’s doing better today. Maybe I’m coming down with whatever he’s had.
I stick to easy to eat things—the rice, a few bites of chicken, a little cheese because it’s yummy and I want it—and forgo the salsa and anything else that makes my stomach churn. The beef in its stew of spices, for example. Just walking past it on the way in made the gorge rise in the back of my throat.
“You feeling alright?” Danny asks. “You’re not eating much.”
See? Nurturing to a fault.
I give him a smile. “I’m fine. We had a big snack earlier. I’m just not very hungry.” It’s mostly true. Eli had a big snack. I had a granola bar. And I’m not very hungry. I don’t want Danny worrying about me when he has to go on stage soon.
He pulls me close and places a kiss on my forehead. “Okay. I gotta go warm up. You gonna stick around for the first part of the show?”
<
br /> “Of course. Eli’d throw a major fit if I tried to drag him away.”
Danny’s blue eyes twinkle when he smiles back at me. “What about you? You don’t wanna stay?”
I laugh. “Fishing for compliments? Of course I want to stay. You guys are awesome.”
That earns me another kiss, this time on the mouth. Maybe I shouldn’t let him kiss me if I’m coming down with something, but I want his kiss too much to turn him down. And I might hurt his feelings if I tried to avoid his kiss now, especially since this is the first time I’ve let him do it in front of his friends.
I’ll just make sure he takes some extra vitamin C. I probably should anyway, since he was up off and on the last few nights with Eli coughing all over him, carrying Eli around and jiggling him back to sleep, then lying down with him in his room when he’d wake up and start crying every time he tried to leave.
There’s no doubt about it, Danny’s a good dad.
After kissing me thoroughly enough to leave me breathless, Danny presses his forehead to mine. “One of these nights we’ll have to get Kendra to watch Eli so you can watch a whole show. Or maybe we can fly my mom out for a visit and let her watch Eli so you can come.”
“Your mom would love that. And so would Eli.”
“And you?”
I cup his cheeks with my palms and bring his lips to mine for one more soft kiss. “I’d love it too.”
That night when Danny gets back, I’m almost asleep on the couch with the TV on.
He comes in and switches it off, looking down at me. “You sure you’re feeling okay?”
I give him a sleepy smile, stretching and sitting up. “Yeah.” My stomach’s back to normal. I had some ginger ale and crackers that I picked up at a drugstore on the way back to the hotel, and whatever weird thing was going on earlier has settled down. “Just tired. None of us have gotten a lot of sleep the last few nights. You must be exhausted. Oh.” I sit up. “Speaking of. I got you some vitamin C. I was thinking about it at dinner. Eli’s been coughing on you and wiping snot on your shirt. On top of the not sleeping. Your immune system needs as much boosting as we can get it or you’ll get sick and have to cancel shows.”
A weird smile comes over his face as he takes the bottle of pills out of my hand, examining the label and orange cap. “You got me vitamins?”
“Um, yeah? Is that not okay?”
He gives a soft laugh and sits next to me, pulling me close and kissing me. He freezes with his lips still on mine, then abruptly pulls back. “Wait. If you’re worried I’m getting sick, should I be kissing you? I don’t want you getting sick either.”
In answer, I wrap my fingers around the back of his neck and pull his face to mine, giving him a deep, thorough kiss, pushing my tongue into his mouth and sucking on his in return. He lets out a low groan and starts leaning me back, only stopping when he puts down the hand with the pill bottle still in it.
He sits up and looks at the bottle again. “Let’s both take some, and then get back to the kissing.”
“Deal.” I hold out my hand, and he rips the seal off the bottle. First he taps two capsules into my palm, then two into his own. He crosses the room to grab a bottle of water from the mini fridge and takes his pills before handing the half-empty water bottle to me.
When I finish swallowing, he’s looking at me again with that crooked half-smile like I’m some fascinating creature he’s never seen before.
“What?” I pat a hand over my hair self-consciously.
He moves in front of me, taking the water bottle from my hand and setting it on the side table, pushing the coffee table out of the way, kneeling on the ground in front of me, and gathering me to him. My legs part around his torso, and he slides his hands into the back of my leggings and flexes his fingers against my ass. “No one but my mom has ever bought me vitamins before.”
“Oh. Is that—“ I can’t talk for a second because he’s kissing my collarbone, using his chin to move aside the fabric of my oversized, off-the-shoulder shirt. I don’t have on a bra underneath it, which he’ll discover very soon if he hasn’t figured it out already. I swallow, forcing myself to continue. “Is that, um, a bad thing?”
He shakes his head slowly, his stubble scraping the top of my breast in the most delicious way. “It’s sweet. I like it. I like taking care of you. And I like that you want to take care of me.” Before I can formulate a response, he takes the neck of my shirt in his teeth and pulls it down, down, until my nipple is exposed. “Christ,” he mutters against my skin. “You’re so fucking perfect. Just like this. Sleepy and braless and waiting on my couch.” His fingers flex against my backside again, his thumbs moving just above the cleft of my ass. “No panties either.”
I shudder at his warm breath blowing across my nipple, the way his tongue gently circles the stiff peak, the rasp of his stubble against my skin as he speaks. “Seemed pointless. You’d just take them off.”
“Damn right.”
And then he sucks my nipple into his mouth, only stopping to lift my shirt up and over my head so he can get better access to both nipples. Soon my leggings are on the floor alongside my shirt, and he scoops me up and carries me to our bedroom. I don’t have a suite of my own this time, now that there’s no reason for it.
He lays me out on the bed, looking me over with hungry eyes as he strips off his clothes, and then he feasts on my flesh, worshipping me with his tongue on every sensitive inch of my skin, bringing me to the peak over and over before finally rolling on a condom and driving himself home, taking me over the edge with my fingers entwined with his, his gaze never leaving mine, his body worshipping me from inside the way his tongue did on the outside.
“Oh, Danny,” I whisper. Unable to say anything other than his name. Unwilling to take the leap and admit the feelings he’s stirring inside me. Biting down on my lip, I arch, and then his lips are on mine, his tongue in my mouth, swallowing my cries of pleasure as we ride out our orgasms together.
The next morning I wake up alone, which isn’t terribly unusual. Eli tends to be an early riser, and Danny gets up with him, letting me sleep.
When I glance at my phone on the bedside table, it’s past ten, which is later than I normally sleep. But I feel rested for the first time in days. Climbing out of bed, I pull on my discarded clothes from last night—including a bra and panties this time since Eli’s up now.
But when I get out to the living area where Danny and Eli are sharing a pile of scrambled eggs, my stomach churns. The scent of coffee burns my nostrils. The eggs smell rotten and sulfurous.
The bacon.
I love bacon.
But that bacon. Oh.
My hand goes to my mouth.
Oh.
Oh no.
Turning, I sprint to the bathroom, making it to the toilet just in time to dry heave, only managing to bring up yellow strings of stomach acid and bile.
Maybe I’m not so fine after all.
Chapter Thirty-Seven
Danny
Standing from the table, I follow Ava back through our bedroom and into the bathroom. The sound of her retching has me hurrying the last few steps. I take over holding back her hair, gathering it from her fingers, combing back a few strands she missed.
When she seems to have brought up everything she can—which isn’t much—I rub her back as she sags against me and press my lips to her forehead. “You don’t feel feverish. Did you eat something last night that didn’t agree with you? Or are you coming down with something?”
She shakes her head, her face pale and drawn. “I don’t know.”
Soft footsteps have me raising my head and looking toward the door. Eli stands there in his Batman pajamas, his eyes large and worried. “Ava sad?”
I shake my head. “No. Ava’s sick. Her tummy doesn’t feel good.”
He steps closer, reaching out to pat Ava’s head. “Poor Ava. Ava sick.”
“Yeah, Eli. I’m not feeling good.”
Leaning over, he wraps his arms a
round her. “Feel better.”
She manages a wan smile and pats his back. “Thanks, Eli. I’ll be better soon. Don’t worry.”
He smacks a kiss on her cheek and then straightens.
“Go finish your breakfast,” I tell him. “I’m going to help Ava back to bed and then we’ll play, okay?”
“Kay,” he says, and runs back out of the bathroom, presumably to do what I asked.
Just when I’m about to ask Ava if she can walk to the bed, she lurches for the toilet again, her body shaking with the force of her heaving. I wait, holding her hair again, wincing at the fact that nothing’s coming out anymore. She’s dry heaving, and it’s awful to watch, helpless to do anything but hold her hair out of the toilet water laced with bile and acid.
After several more unsuccessful attempts to vomit, she slumps to the side again. Without a word, I close the toilet and flush it, then lift her in my arms. I’ve picked her up before, but she feels heavier this time, limp. Normally she hangs onto me, but this time she just clutches weakly at my shirt, making halfhearted protests that she can walk.
She probably could, but she’s so miserable, and I need to do something. Even if it’s stupid, at least I can carry her to the bed and make sure she’s as comfortable as possible.
I tuck the blankets around her, brushing her hair back from her forehead and placing a kiss there. “You gonna be okay?”
She nods. “Yeah. I think so. Probably just a twenty-four hour bug.”
“I hope so. Get some rest. I’ll have someone run and get you some medicine. Do you want anything else? Saltines? Sprite? Soup?”
One hand sort of flops around, which I can’t interpret, so I make the executive decision to tell Blaire to go personally to get any and all stomach remedies at the nearest store. She’ll know what works best. She always does.
I kiss Ava’s forehead one more time, tucking the blankets around her, and closing the door softly behind me when I leave.
Shouldn't Want You (Cataclysm Book 2) Page 20