I sat up with her impaled on my cock my finger in her ass as we fucked each other our mouths fused together, our moans and groans shared between each other. It was wild and hot and I wanted to stay right there for the rest of my life.
She was nervous and flustered three days later when she came in from school, she was also being way too quiet.
“What’s up with you Dominique why so quiet?”
“I have something to tell you.”
Here it comes, school was almost over she was graduating with honors and she’d already been accepted to a school out of state. She was probably nervous about telling me that she wanted to end things that she wanted to move on with her life. I felt knots in my stomach but I made myself hold still, this is what I wanted after all isn’t it? For her to go on with her life?
“I’m pregnant.”
My sight dimmed for a minute and there was a ringing in my ears, luckily I was already sitting down or I probably would’ve landed my ass on the floor.
“What did you just say?”
She started crying and wringing her hands as she uttered those words again.
“How?” It was all I could get out; she was on the pill weren’t those things supposed to work?”
“I’m sorry…I knew you would send me away even after I told you I didn’t want to…I…”
“Wait a minute what are you saying?”
She just stared at me so frightened; I haven’t seen that sad look on her little face since the day of her dad’s funeral. My heart hurt for a minute, I never wanted to see that look on her precious face again never thought I would.
“I know you’re gonna hate me now but it was the only way, I’m sorry.”
She broke down in tears as I sat there taking it all in; was she saying what I think she’s saying? That she did this on purpose? My heart picked up speed as my mind raced. When my mind cleared and I heard her heart breaking sobs I got up and went to her.
“Shh, shh, baby come on.” I didn’t know what I was going to do but I did know I couldn’t just leave her like this.
Picking her up I sat with her on my lap soothing her until she calmed a little.
“It’s going to be okay sweetheart I’ve got you.”
She was having my baby that was the one thought that kept playing over and over again in my head. I’m going to be a father, fuck; I didn’t know how to feel, I wasn’t upset not really. My biggest worry was her; what was this going to do to her life?
“Baby why did you do it?”
“Because I want to stay with you but you wouldn’t listen to me, you kept insisting that I have to go away to school.”
“Baby I just wanted what was best for you, I want you to have choices.”
“But that’s my choice I want to be here with you I don’t want to leave you please don’t make me.”
“It’s okay we’ll figure it out, I am mad at you though, you shouldn’t have done this, you took my choice away from me just as you’re accusing me of doing to you how is that fair?”
She held me tighter as I caressed her hair gently; my sweet girl is going to be a mom.
I chose not to bring it up anymore for the rest of that day since it seemed so upsetting to her and she relaxed enough to make dinner with me but didn’t seem to have much of an appetite. It was only as we were cleaning up that I realized what an ass I’d been. She had made this choice yes but she must be so scared, nineteen and pregnant. Not that that was so bad but she’d done it for all the wrong reasons because I’d backed her into a corner in her mind. Instead of reassuring her I’d accused, I looked at her now as she loaded the dishwasher, so forlorn. I had a lot to think about, no I didn’t like the way she’d done this but it was already done there was no going back. I could either hurt her by fighting it or I could accept it. Problem was I wasn’t sure how I felt; I wasn’t prepared for fatherhood hadn’t given it much thought. I was in love with her that much I knew but I couldn’t help feeling a little annoyed that she had taken the choice away from me, that she’d made that decision for both of us. A decision that would change both our lives.
That night I needed some time to myself to think, I didn’t want her to see it as rejection, in her vulnerable state who knew what was going on in her head? So I didn’t turn her away from my bed but I didn’t join her there either.
“I have some things to take care of in my office you should get some sleep.” I saw the hurt in her eyes as I turned and walked away, this was the first night that I wouldn’t be making love to her that she wouldn’t be falling asleep in my arms.
Chapter 8
Alone in my office I held a glass of bourbon as I played my life over and over again in my head. I’d ran away from this place as fast as my feet would carry me almost seventeen years earlier. I’d wanted to taste life in the big bad world, wanted to know something more than these fields and this small town existence. Then things had changed drastically that had brought me back here; now with this new development I was stuck here again. But did I ever really have another choice before the baby? Would I have ever been free of the ranch? Yes I could’ve hired someone to run it for me but would I have ever done it? Who knows, now I’ll never know, and what about fatherhood? That was the biggest commitment I’ll ever make in my life, a responsibility that never ends. Was I ready for that? Was she? All these questions bombarded me as I sat there in the dark alone with my thoughts.
By the following morning I awakened still sitting in the same chair.
“Fuck.” I hadn’t meant to fall asleep down here. A check upstairs showed that she had left for school already, I could kick my own ass for letting her leave like that with things so up in the air but we’ll take care of it when she gets home this evening.
I kept myself busy and my mind occupied for the rest of the day into the early evening about the time that she was supposed to be returning home from school. When she wasn’t home at her usual time I didn’t think much of it, she’s a teenager after all with friends and a life. That was all going to change in a few short months with a baby, a change I had come to accept some time in the wee hours of the morning. The bottom line is that I love my girl I’ve never loved anyone the way I love her. I want to spend the rest of my life with her, and now with the baby. There was a new sense of excitement in my heart a son; damn I can already see it.
By six o’clock when there was still no sign of her I started calling around to her friends. No one had seen her after she left school hours earlier. I started panicking and ran out to my car with cell phone in hand. I took the route she would’ve taken home but there was no sign of her. I took the back roads and visited the places where the kids liked to hang out but there was no sign of her there either. I started feeling sick to my stomach as I headed for the sheriff’s office to file a missing person’s report. I was never so fucking scared in my life as I was when I walked into that place and had to give them information about my woman being missing. They tried giving me that forty eight hours crap but I wasn’t having it.
“Do you want to be sheriff next election Herman? Then I suggest you get your ass in gear and go find her.”
“No need to get all het up Ty it’s just procedure.”
“Fuck your procedure there’s a young girl out there all alone now get off your fat ass and go find her.” I didn’t wait around to see if he was following orders, he knows the deal if he wants the backing of the Bar D ranch this coming election he’d do what the fuck I tell him to do. I retraced my steps again willing myself not to give into my fear. It’s been a while since I’ve had to use my training the training that had helped me in and out of tight situations and dangerous locations in my work but that’s what I did. I went into warrior mode; if anyone had laid a fucking hand on her they were fucked. No judge no jury just me, and my sawed off shotgun. It never entered my mind that she might’ve run off no way. Every time the thought that she might’ve done that even tried to settle in my thoughts my heart hurt and my gut burned. If she did that I will tan her
I couldn’t go back to the house; I made some calls in between calling her cell number every other minute and had people out searching. There was no sign of her car anywhere in town now her friends were all out looking for her. I found her closest girlfriend if anyone knew anything she would.
“Where is she Tracy?”
“I don’t know Mr. Durant sir I promise I would tell you if I did.”
She was nervous and fidgety, for a seasoned investigative reporter those were tells.
“You’re lying, now you’re a kid so I’m going to give you a chance here but don’t play with me if anything happens to her while she’s out there I will make everyone involved pay now talk.”
“She’s with Corey.”
“Who the fuck is that?”
“Our friend from school, they’re just friends she said she needed to get away for a bit and he said he’d take her…I think…I think he likes her more than a friend so he didn’t want her to be alone.”
“Where is she?”
“Um…”
“Do not fuck with me where is she?”
She gave me a location and I rushed back to my car, my girl was headed a few towns away, her little friend claims she doesn’t know what she was going there for but I had a bad feeling in my stomach that I did.
Chapter 9
The motel clerk started giving me shit until I threatened his ass and he passed over the key.
She was balled up on the bed crying while her friend sat in the chair next to her trying to calm her down. They both jumped and turned when I opened the door and walked in. I saw the look of relief on the young man’s face and that saved his ass from an ass beating.
“You drive her car here?”
“Yes sir.”
“Head home I’ve got it from here.” He looked down at her and then back at me before grabbing the keys from the table and leaving.
She still hadn’t said anything as yet but I could tell she’d been crying, walking over I took the seat the boy had just left.
“Why?”
Her mouth moved but no words came out; she swallowed and cried harder shredding the tissue in her hands before trying again.
“You didn’t want us.” She looked at me from beneath her lashes then.
“Are you out of your fucking mind? You want to be treated like an adult and these are the kind of decisions you make? What were you going to do Dominique?”
“Nothing I promise I’d changed my mind we were just trying to figure out how to come back I knew you were going to be upset when I didn’t come home I didn’t know what to do but I was coming back I swear I couldn’t have gone through with it.”
“You came here to kill my child give me one good reason why I shouldn’t hate you.”
“I wasn’t gonna go through with it I swear, I thought you didn’t want us.” She swiped beneath her nose as the tears flowed freely.
“Why would you think that?”
“Last night, you just left and you were so upset.”
“I told you I had some stuff to do I was right downstairs for fuck sake.”
“Don’t yell at me, don’t you see I’m scared?”
“And whose fault is that? You made this decision on your own with no thought for me, or what I might want and just because I needed one fucking night to think things over you came here to to kill my fucking kid? Who the fuck are you?”
“I didn’t mean it, I wouldn’t have done it, I just thought it was what you wanted.” I studied her for the longest time not saying anything.
“Let’s get out of here the whole damn town is looking for you I have to go let them know you’re fine.”
I didn’t say anything at all to her on the way home I had nothing to say, I’m sure she had come to her senses at some point but the fact that she’d even thought of doing it fucked with my head. I called the sheriff on the way back and let him know to call off the search I’m going to have to make it up to that fucker somehow.
Back at home I let her in the house and took her stuff.
“Did you eat?”
“I’m not hungry.”
“You have to eat if not for you then do it for the baby.”
I went into the kitchen and made her some tea and soup and made her eat. She was withdrawn and sullen but she ate while I watched.
“You ever do some shit like this again Dominique we’re through I don’t care what excuses you have you ever fuck up like this again we’re through what you were about to do is…I can’t even put it into words.”
“I’m sorry, I was just, I didn’t want to do it, I wouldn’t have done it.”
“I hope for your sake that that’s true.”
“What do you want me to do? You just turned away from me I thought it’s what you would want.”
“I would never want that; you know what I think? I think you’re a very naive little girl who wants to play house.”
“That’s not true at all I didn’t know what else to do.”
“Eat.” I made myself a pot of coffee and sat down across from her, she kept her head down refusing to look at me.
“Who is he?”
“What?”
“The kid in the motel room with you, who is he?”
“Corey?”
“Yeah who is he?”
“Just a friend from school.”
“Why him?”
“What do you mean?”
“Why wasn’t Tracy the one with you?”
“I don’t know, Corey said he’d take me.”
“Does he know what you were there for?”
“No no one knows I just told them I wasn’t feeling well and that I wanted to make sure I wasn’t sick like before.”
“Look at me.” I reached across the table to take her little hand in mine, I couldn’t help remembering the young girl I’d brought him with me, the child who’d become so ill and had depended on me for everything that first year we were together. I had too many images of Dominique in my head and maybe that was the problem, maybe I needed to see her as what she wanted to me to see, and what I so desperately wanted her to be. Only then will I be able to move forward and abandon the guilt completely.
She’d always let it be known through her actions how she really felt; in the beginning I’d believed her too young to know her mind, I’d brushed aside her attempts to get closer. Was she ready for a man like me, could she be?
“Are you sure this is what you really want sweetheart?”
“What do you mean? If what is what I really want?”
“Me, us, the baby, you do understand what that means don’t you? It would mean marriage to me, it would mean you being stuck here with me for the rest of our lives; once we make that jump there’s no going back babe. Do you understand that?”
If I’d had any doubts before the look that came into her eyes cleared them all away. There was hope and light and fuck me, love. She loved me, I don’t think I’ve ever seen true love before until this moment sitting at this hundred year old table with her hand clasped in mine.
“Yes I know what it means and I want that more than anything else in the world.” She seemed to be holding her breath as the pulse in her throat jumped. I held her eyes as I studied her my thumb brushing back and forth across the palm of her hand.
“Come.” I kept her hand in mine as she came around the table to me sitting on my lap.
“This is how it all started.” I teased her softly.
She laughed shyly and hid her face in my neck as I held her close. I could feel the runaway beating of her heart. I kissed her hair, her face, every place I could reach.
“So be it then.”
“You mean it?”
“Of course I mean it have I ever lied to you?”
“No, you’ve been honest to a fault.” She rolled her eyes at me.
“You’re such a brat; so it looks like we have lot of decisions to make.”
“Um can we do that tomorrow? I’m kind of tired it’s been a long day and besides I miss you.”
“I’m right here baby.”
“But you weren’t last night and I didn’t get to do this.”
She kissed me shyly at first but when I didn’t pull away she deepened it her tongue entering my mouth to play.
“Not here baby the table’s too hard for you in your condition.” I picked her up and took her up the stairs to my bed, our bed now. For the first time I found the patience to undress her slowly, to treat her with care. We undressed each other between kisses and soft touches before I laid her on the bed. Covering her body with mine.
“Pretty soon I won’t be able to lie on you like this.” I kissed my way down her body until I reached her tummy where I kissed the place where my child slept. It finally hit me, like a shot to the heart; she was carrying my child, a part of me was in there right now how fucking outstanding was that?
I continued down her body kissing her thighs softly, taking little nips out of her skin until I reached my goal. I didn’t hesitate to sink my tongue deep into her, her hands pulled on my hair asking me to love her with my mouth. With one finger pushed inside her ass I ate her until she came in my mouth. I lifted up so I could reach her mouth and kissed her deeply while teasing her wet slit with my cock.
“Put me inside you.”
She took me in her hand and led me into her heat; I sank in inch by inch until I was buried all the way inside her. Three strokes and I stopped, taking her face in my hands I looked into her eyes.
“I love you, I really love you more than I’ve ever loved anything or anyone in my life. I promise to take care of you and him or her for as long as I live.” I reached down between us and pressed my hand into her flat stomach gently before taking her lips in a kiss.
We danced slowly together our bodies heating up as our passions built. Those sweet loving cries of hers made me feverish with need and I fucked harder my body calling for more, needing more.
“I’m going to fuck you hard now sweetie hold on to me.” Her arms came up around me and I let go showing her with my body just how much I wanted and needed her until she came with a sigh, her walls closing in around me, until I too found fulfillment emptying my seed deep inside her.
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