Falling for Alexander (Corkscrew Bay #2)

by Claire Robyns

  He should never have become involved with a reporter, bringing the press or anyone related into his home. It was a risk he wasn’t prepared to shy away from, for his heart. Kate had grabbed him from the very beginning and he refused to give her up.

  But Helena had already suffered once from his choices.

  As much as he trusted Kate, he couldn’t shift the feeling that he was tempting disaster. He’d lived with other fallouts from the media too long to snap his fingers and pretend what he felt for Kate instantly wiped it all away. He didn’t care. He still wanted her. More than he’d ever wanted—ever needed—anyone or anything.

  Kate started walking toward him. Slow hesitant steps, but at least they were in the right direction.

  “As much as you don’t want to hear the word again, cara, my family has a complicated history with the media—”

  “—and I’m not just a reporter,” she cut in, her voice low and smooth, too even. “I own the local newspaper.”

  He’d go to hell and back for Kate.

  But he wouldn’t, couldn’t send his sister there again.

  “This is more about me than you,” he said. “You’d never hurt me or anyone of mine. I know that.”

  “I’m beginning to understand. It’s complicated and you wanted to keep it simple. That’s fine.” She stopped a good couple of feet from him. “But you shouldn’t have lied to me, Alex.”

  “I didn’t lie, cara.” A small omission, perhaps, but he’d just substantiated everything he’d told her.

  She looked at him, shadows crossing her eyes. “Then why does it feel like one?”

  “In that case, I’m sorry.” He unfolded his arms, moving forward to reach for her.

  She lurched backward. “I have to go.”

  A hard knot formed in his stomach. He couldn’t lose her. Not like this. “I mean it, Kate. I’m sorry. I should have told you about Helena.”

  Her chin nudged up. “Yes, Alex, you should have.”

  His jaw clenched. Every muscle within strained to go to her, to fold her against him, to keep her from leaving. “Don’t leave me.”

  “I’m mad at you, absolutely furious!” She sighed, a gruff, frustrated sound. “I am leaving, Alex, but I’m not leaving you. I need to cool off and you should spend this time alone with your sister as you’d planned. I’ll see you on the weekend.”

  His arms tightened around his chest as he watched her leave. She’d said she wasn’t leaving him. That didn’t make him feel better at all. He’d screwed up. He knew it. He just didn’t know what to do about it. He was torn. Not between two choices, but straight down the middle from lack of any choice.

  He trusted Kate…he did. Didn’t he?

  He did.

  Hell, the way his chest ached at the thought of losing her, he was probably in as deep as a man could get. But he didn’t come as a family package. He wouldn’t expose his sister to the life he lived, to the choices he made, ever again. Not even for Kate. Not even for himself.

  When he returned inside, he was immediately accosted from the other front.

  “That’s it?” demanded Helena, her eyes rounded in exasperation. “You let her just walk away?”

  “Not now, Helena.” He put a hand out as he strode past her.

  “You know what Aunt Maggie always told us,” she called after him. “Never go to bed angry.”

  “I’m not angry at anyone,” he stated.

  “Alexander!”

  He stopped and turned, in no mood to indulge his little sister.

  She ignored the grim look he gave her. “Go after her, Alex.”

  “Kate doesn’t want me to go after her,” he said harshly, then softened his tone when it struck him that Helena might be feeling responsible for the argument. “Kate and I are fine. She just needs a couple of days to cool off.”

  “That’s what you think?” scoffed Helena.

  “That’s what I know.” He wasn’t a fool. He knew things weren’t right between him and Kate, but he also knew she hadn’t walked out on him. “Kate’s okay with giving us space while you’re here.”

  “She said that?”

  “In as many words.”

  “Why are men so clueless? She doesn’t want to be left alone until I’m gone, you idiot. What she wants is to be validated in your relationship. To feel as if you’re drawing her into your life, not pushing her out.” Helena rolled her eyes at him. “Tell you what, invite her over for supper tomorrow night. I’ll even cook my lasagne.”

  He shook his head.

  “It makes no difference what she said.” Helena blew out a noisy breath. “She wants this.”

  He didn’t need Helena to tell him that he’d rejected Kate from a part of his life and, no matter what was said, she’d resent him for it.

  The truth, however, remained. “I don’t.”

  “I have a confession to make.” Helena came up to him, her gaze dropping to his chest. “I overheard you on the phone with Kate. I heard emotion in your voice that I’ve never heard before, not for any of the women you dangle on your arm.” Her gaze lifted to his. “I wanted to meet this woman who made your voice smile. That’s what brought me here. Not because I needed solitude or downtime. I’m strong, Alex, stronger than I’ve ever been. Mark has given me strength and happiness.”

  They’d been here before.

  His thoughts must have shown of his face, because she quickly added, “He didn’t lend me strength and happiness, Alex. He gave it to me. I don’t know how else to explain this. I love him. And even if I lose him, I think I might be able to hurt without breaking. You don’t have to worry about me.”

  An enormous weight shifted from Alex’s shoulders. “I’m pleased to hear that, but this is still your home, Helena. You should be able to relax here without intrusions.”

  “Kate isn’t an intrusion.”

  The glint in her eyes reminded him of just how stubborn his sister could be. He wasn’t going to get away with this.

  “Kate is a reporter,” he told her. “She owns the newspaper in town. The Corkscrew Weekly.”

  Helena paled. “I don’t understand.”

  “I won’t bring the media into your home, no matter how strong and happy you are.”

  “Yes…that I understand.” Her eyes closed as she swallowed. “What I don’t understand is why you would—what you’re—” She opened her eyes again, peering at him from beneath a creased brow. “What are you doing, Alex? Of anyone out there you could have, why—”

  “It’s Kate,” he said firmly, turning from her to walk away. He’d do whatever it took to protect his sister, he’d hurt Kate doing so, he’d hurt himself, but this was non-negotiable. “I want only Kate.”

  Chapter Sixteen

  Kate went to bed with her fury and woke up mad.

  It wasn’t so much that Alexander wasn’t ready for her to meet his sister as the fact that he hadn’t mentioned he had a sister. Stalling on the family introductions was one thing. She wasn’t planning on taking him home for Sunday lunch quite yet either, but she had spoken about her parents in their endless phone calls this last week.

  It took a second mug of coffee before she could think straight, and then she wished she could rewind. Crawl back into bed and just stay mad for another day.

  Clearly the media had messed with his family and their lives at some point and, she being who she was, didn’t help. He’d actually been telling the truth when he’d said it was complicated. He had valid reasons, reasons she simply didn’t yet know, for his reluctance to let her inside.

  She should feel better.

  She should… but she didn’t.

  She’d felt they belonged, no matter what. No matter that they hadn’t even known each other two weeks ago.

  Time had no meaning when she was as necessary to Alexander as breathing.

  She’d believed there was nothing that couldn’t be done, couldn’t be fixed, when it came to them being together.

  She was wrong. Alexander hadn’t let her over onto his
side of the wall. He’d simply lowered some walls for her to lean across.

  They weren’t broken, but they could be. A possibility she’d irrationally decided somewhere along the way would never apply to them.

  And now she couldn’t even stay angry at him, because she was the only crazy one out of the two of them. Doubts were natural, especially at this early stage.

  How in blazes had she arrived at the conclusion that their happily-ever-after was guaranteed?

  It wasn’t his fault that their relationship was just as fragile and unpredictable as every other normal relationship on the planet.

  But it was, and now she had to adjust her heart to the fact that they could go either way. They were just a couple, getting to know each other, falling in love, perhaps working out, perhaps not.

  It was such an ordinary place to be, really.

  And such a far way down from the extraordinary height of the pedestal she’d put them on.

  By the time she’d finished sifting through the emails for the classified ads page, she was ready to admit she was a moron. Alexander and her had just as much a chance of surviving as the next couple. Sure, they had hurdles in their path, but who didn’t?

  She was just coming out of her slump when Helena, of all people, walked through from the reception.

  “I hope it’s alright for me to barge in like this,” she said, smiling as she walked up to Kate’s desk. “There was no one at reception.”

  Kate’s jaw went slack as she watched the woman approach, paying closer attention now that she knew who Helena was. She was a softer, more colourful version of her brother. Her eyes a shade lighter, her brows a shade darker, her lips fuller and a shade pinker. The elegant setting of the rock on her fourth finger indicated her fiancée had style as well as money.

  “Does Alex know you’re here?” Kate asked.

  “He’s my brother, not my keeper.” She slid into the chair opposite Kate, her gaze warm and friendly.

  Kate couldn’t imagine why, not after the awful scene she’d caused. “I’m sorry you got caught in the middle of our tiff yesterday.”

  “I’m afraid I was the cause.”

  “If you’re here on Alex’s behalf—”

  “I’m here on your behalf.”

  What had Alexander said to his sister? Kate’s heart pinched. She sucked in a deep breath, refusing to give her worry credence. “I was going to say it wasn’t necessary, but maybe you know something I don’t.”

  Helena looked at her in silence for a moment before continuing. “About four years ago, I dated a lead guitarist for a band. Ever heard of Sundown Serpents?”

  Kate shook her head, wondering where this was going. “Are you involved in the music industry as well?”

  “God, no, I take strictly after my mother in that department.” She chuckled. “I met Mickie at a party Alex took me along to. That’s part of the problem, you see. He feels doubly responsible because I met Mickie through him.”

  “I’m guessing this Mickie was bad news?”

  “I can’t put all the blame on him.” She leant back in her chair and crossed her legs. “He never hid who and what he was, but I didn’t care. I loved him so much, anything was better than trying to live without him. And I thought I could handle it. The drugs were light at first, a couple of pills and such. I had this crazy notion that as long as I wasn’t sniffing with them, I’d be fine.”

  Kate’s heart went out to her. “You became addicted.”

  She shook her head. “I was lucky. But I spent enough nights zoned out for it to bite me on the ass. Pictures got into the papers, Kate. Photos of me at some party, with Mickie and three others guys I don’t remember ever meeting.”

  Helena swallowed, closing her eyes. “I was interning at an interior design studio back then, and they no longer wanted me. My best friend from school days wouldn’t take my calls, when I finally screwed up the courage to phone her for a sanity check.”

  She didn’t elaborate on the type of pictures, didn’t need to. The fallout explained more than a thousand images.

  “The people we love the most can be the cruellest,” Kate murmured.

  “I was a wreck,” Helena went on. “Losing Mickie was bad enough, but losing him like that, knowing he’d never cared for me at all, the way he’d used me, shared me, and I’d let him… I hated myself more than the rest of the world could. I couldn’t live with myself, with the shame I’d brought on Alex and my aunt…on myself. I was revolted at the low I’d sunk to.” Her eyes opened, slowly lifting to Kate. “I didn’t want to live.”

  Horror punched Kate in the gut with the force of a fist. “You didn’t…?”

  “I very nearly succeeded. And then I hated Alex for finding me in time.” She took a deep breath, shaking off her emotions with a shudder. The tension pulling at her mouth and throat relaxed. “Do you understand now? Alex has never forgiven himself, and he’ll never forgive the press for plastering my shame all over the state.”

  “Castle Darrock was your sanctuary.”

  Helena nodded. “He shouldn’t have tried to hide me from you, I agree, but he doesn’t always behave rationally when it comes to the media or protecting me from myself.”

  “Thanks for telling me this,” Kate said. “It must have been difficult, opening yourself up to a stranger.”

  “You’re not a stranger, Kate. You matter to Alex.” She was smiling again, the shadows of her past back where they belonged. “It’s impossible not to notice how much.”

  Kate returned the smile, straining to stay in her chair. She wanted to jump up and hug the woman. For everything she’d been through. For sharing her story. For giving a huge part of Alexander back to Kate. “He matters to me, too.”

  “Have you eaten yet?” Helena asked. “I’d hoped to catch you in time for lunch.”

  “I could eat.” She grabbed her purse from the drawer and stood. “What did you have in mind?”

  “Is Sloppy Fish still there on the pier?” Helena joined her and they made their way out. “I have dreams about their fat chips drenched in vinegar.” She made a drooling noise. “God, especially when you leave them in the wax paper until they’re good and soggy.”

  “That sounds…”

  “Disgusting.” Helena chuckled. “The best things in life always are.”

  Kate laughed with her, and they fell into an easy conversation as they strolled through the paved town centre and then cut along an alley to the seafront. Kate felt so comfortable with her, she was sure they’d be close friends, if Alexander ever gave them the chance. She was dying to ask Helena where he was, what he was doing. But considering he hadn’t even wanted her to know he had a sister, she wouldn’t stoop that low.

  The unusually hot weather had brought the crowds out, but the schools were back this week and it’d be a couple of hours still before kids packed the waves and the open arcade on the pier.

  The line trailed from Sloppy Fish all the way onto the sand and they waited almost twenty minutes for their order. They did manage to snag a bench on the promenade from a couple who swapped their entwined position for a stroll on the sandy beach.

  As they ate, they chatted about this and that, nothing in particular. A slight breeze had picked up, turning muggy to just perfect. Kate stretched her legs out, pulling her gaze from the mesmerising roll of timeless waves.

  “Unfortunately, I have to get back to work.” She looked at Helena. “I’m pleased we had a chance to get to know each other a little.”

  “Same here.” Helena crumpled a ball from the wax paper her chips had come in. She shifted on the bench to face Kate. “You will be careful, won’t you?”

  Kate struggled to follow for a second, her mind a fogbank of too much sun and ocean, and then it hit her. With this family, it seemed that everything always came back to her and her job. Of course, she understood a whole lot better now. “I’d never hurt Alex.”

  “I believe you, but that’s the thing I’ve learnt about mistakes. They happen regardless of int
ention and the damage is inflicted before you realise what you’ve done. And when I say you, I mean you, me…people in general.”

  “I’ll heed the warning,” Kate said, her mood somewhat cooled.

  She appreciated Helena looking out for her brother, she didn’t even blame her, but her own position wasn’t exactly pleasant.

  What was she supposed to do?

  Sell the Corkscrew Weekly? The paper she’d built up from the early beginnings of the quarterly Roll-With-It newsletters she’d started in high school?

  “I guess it is a warning of sorts, but it’s on your behalf as much as Alex’s. He likes you, much more than I originally assumed considering the obvious conflict he’s swept aside for you.” Her expression was as soft as it was sombre. “The malicious scrutiny of the press cost him his home, his country, his family…even his name, long before that incident with me occurred.”

  She leant in, placing a hand on Kate’s arm. “I like you, too, Kate, and I wouldn’t want you to get hurt. And I can’t help thinking—knowing, that when it comes to this, one mistake is all you’ll ever get. There won’t be second chances with Alex, not after what he’s been through.”

  Chapter Seventeen

  The warning stayed with Kate throughout the afternoon. Every time she tried to shake it from her head, from her heart, the doubts came back twice as hard. Were they really as doomed as Helena made them out to be? Would her relationship with Alexander always be as fragile as walking on eggshells until something cracked when she forgot to look?

  She didn’t want to believe it. Surely Helena was exaggerating? Maybe even extrapolating her own experiences and feelings? Besides, she’d already made her first mistake and she was still standing.

  But what about the next mistake?