Night Moves

by Kristen Strassel

  In an attempt to hide the dumbstruck look on my face, I tore my eyes away from the Ryder lookalike, surveyed the rest of the room and saw the drummer, Adam, and the bassist who had recently replaced Chaz. Drake was nowhere to be seen; he was the face of the band, and was notoriously hard to track down. Unless the best Soul Divider tribute band ever was sitting in this bar, Ryder was definitely sitting next to me, grinning at catching me off guard.

  “I just drove for like eight hours. One drink and I wouldn’t even be able to stay awake to eat.”

  “Are you travelling for business or pleasure?” His brown eyes smoldered as he watched me lick my lips and rake my fingers through my hair nervously. I didn’t know how to answer his question even if it hadn’t been loaded with innuendo.

  It wasn’t just that my teenage fantasy had called the bartender back over to add some rum to my coke; he looked so much like Jamie I could barely breathe. They could be cousins, if not brothers. They shared those high cheekbones, tawny skin, and big, dark eyes I couldn’t help but lose myself in. Ryder looked more exotic with his long hair and rock star get up, but otherwise the universe was daring me to make another dangerous move.

  “Pleasure.” I finally managed after taking a long, potent sip of my drink. I wasn’t sure if it was the best word to use, but given my choices, it was the best I could do.

  “I’m here on business, but I can make some time for pleasure.” His gaze lowered to the neckline of my sweater, which had drooped forward. My bra was probably hanging out, and it wasn’t even a cute one. Normally, I would have pushed my chest forward in invitation, but tonight I felt shy. Unsure. Ashamed.

  “What’s your name?” He asked when he finally tore his eyes away from my chest.

  “Melanie.” I doubted myself and wondered if I should have told him something else besides the truth. After all, I was in this bar running away from it.

  He took my hand and squeezed it. “I’m—”

  “I know who you are.” It felt weird to tell him that. But since I was exploring this new policy of honesty, I might as well own up to the fact that Ryder’s face wallpapered my bedroom for years. He took it in stride, but it didn’t make the situation feel any less awkward for me. I swallowed hard, trying to steer the subject back into neutral territory. “Did you play a show tonight?”

  “Yeah. Now we’re stuck here, overnight. Our show for tomorrow night in Rhode Island just got cancelled because of some blizzard. So we’re staying here until we head to Michigan.”

  At one time in my life, I wouldn’t have missed that Rhode Island show for anything. Erin and I would have seriously considered going to the Michigan show as well. Man, how long had it been since I’d talked to Erin? I missed her so much. Now, I didn’t even know one of my favorite bands had a show scheduled in my backyard. Or what Erin was doing. Just another reminder of what I gave up for that job.

  I couldn’t let my life keep passing me by. I had to make the most of every moment until I wound up in jail.

  The bartender slid over my loaded California burger, oozing with guacamole. The rest of the plate heaped was with fries. A pretty messy choice to eat in front of a rock star. My stomach purred in appreciation. Ryder Maddox beside me or not, I was tearing into this.

  “Well, at least you won’t be cold tonight.” I smiled as I munched a fry. What the fuck was I thinking?

  “That’s for damn sure, baby.” Two shot glasses magically appeared in front of us. I downed the amber liquid, challenging Ryder as my empty glass hit the bar first. Without saying a word, the bartender refilled our glasses. I went back to work on my burger. Chances were pretty good that my teenage fantasy was trying to get me into bed, and I didn’t plan on passing out before I got there.

  Ryder moved a little closer to me. “Where’s your boyfriend tonight?”

  “I don’t have a boyfriend.” The words sounded traitorous coming out of my mouth. But now it was true.

  “So your girlfriends are waiting for you back at the room?”

  “Nope.” I didn’t feel like playing twenty questions. Talking still scared me. I couldn’t trust myself not to say something that would land me in jail.

  He raised an eyebrow. “Are you here with your family?”

  “I’m here alone.”

  “Would you like some company tonight?” He eyed my mostly empty plate with amusement. I’d surprised myself as well. Most days, I didn’t have time to eat, especially like that, and I was usually too stressed out to care. He probably didn’t think I could pack it away, and he probably surrounded himself with bimbos who didn’t eat. He lifted his eyes to mine, making my heart leap like I was a dumbstruck teenager.

  I took a deep breath as I wiped my face with my napkin. The last thing I needed was avocado all over my face while the sexiest man in Scranton hit on me. Sure, I was just a warm body to him, but my body ached for comfort. Affection.

  I took a deep breath to steady myself. “That sounds nice.”

  Ryder stood and leaned in to my barstool, his hand brushing my shoulder. “Let’s get out of here.”

  I rose, dazed from the alcohol I had no plans of drinking and the rock star I’d had no plans of fucking, and followed him without saying another word. He reached his hand around my waist and pulled me in so close that I bumped into him as we walked.

  Just like Jamie used to do.

  Sure, I had drunken one night stands in college, and I expected this to be just as awful as they had been. I’d braced myself for a few impersonal thrusts and anticipated being sent promptly on my way feeling sticky, used, and even more frustrated than before we started. But much to my delighted surprise, Ryder Maddox seemed to need to feel something as much as I did right now.

  Even when Jamie and I were still best friends and not the estranged roommates we had become, which in my tunnel vision memory already seemed like a lifetime ago, I’d never felt appreciated or wanted when I had been with him as I did in a cheap chain motel room with this virtual stranger. It had been a spiritual experience. If it was possible to find religion through another human being, I was willing to let Ryder lead the way. He made me feel things I could barely process.

  He was just the fantasy I needed to take me away from my reality.

  I woke up with my head on his chest; dazed, confused, but feeling more peaceful than I could remember, ever. It’d been so long since I woke up reeling with life, refreshed. Without dread. The scene in my apartment replayed in my head and now seemed like it happened to someone else, a made for TV movie I could hardly hold interest in.

  In the dim light, I traced my finger lightly across Ryder’s collarbone as he slept. I stared absent mindedly at his infamous broken glass Flying V guitar laying on the makeshift dining table, refracting jagged light on the wall and ceiling. How many times as a teenager had I watched him caress its strings, running his fingers seductively up and down its neck, making it cry out in ecstasy? Last night, those work-worn fingers played me just as nimbly.

  I shuddered, clenching my thighs together at the thought.

  Now I wanted to wake him.

  I lowered my lips to his skin and began running my tongue down the hollows of the muscles of his chest.

  “Hey,” Ryder’s voice was still sleep graveled. He pulled my face to his in a fluid moment and kissed me in appreciation. “It looks like you’re still hungry for more?”

  “I’m glad you can see. I can’t see anything! It’s like midnight in here.” I wriggled free of his strong arms and threw the blankets back. The cool air slapped against my bare skin as I made my way to peel back the thick curtains.

  Ryder beat me to the windows. How, I don’t know. He’d been lying on the bed when I got up, watching my every move. Gently, he placed his hands on my shoulders and looked into my puzzled eyes, smiling like that magic trick he just pulled wasn’t worth mentioning. He turned my body around, pressing his own against mine, and led me back to the bed. I felt his cool breath tickle my ear as he whispered. “I’m hungry, too.”


  The purr of his words made my knees buckle. I didn’t care about his parlor trick anymore.

  My body stretched over the tangled sheets, with Ryder’s body covering mine as I relaxed. I closed my eyes and savored the feel of his mouth tickling my stomach and his lips licking and sucking my breasts. I reached up to put my arms on his broad shoulders, my fingers digging into his skin as his teeth teased my nipples. As my fingernails met his skin, Ryder stopped suddenly, sending shockwaves through my system. Straddling me, he pushed my hips down into the mattress with his thighs as he looked around the room thoughtfully. Without saying a word, he got up off the bed to grab something. My breath caught in my throat, strangling me. What did I do to make him stop? If he picked up his phone and started texting or tweeting, so help me God. I would get up, walk out of this room with what little was left of my pride, and with whatever clothes I could find in the dark.

  I was sick of sex being my undoing.

  Ryder returned to the bed, once again straddling me. I reached out for his erect penis, wanting to make sure he didn’t get distracted again. He grabbed my hand before I reached my goal. My eyes widened, confused. He leaned up over me, taking my free hand in his other hand and joining them together over my head. Holding me still, he kissed me before tying my hands together with whatever he got up to retrieve. After making sure my arms were securely knotted together, he then tied the loose fabric to the headboard.

  The only movement I could make was to arch my back. Ryder slid down my body again, his eyes wickedly playful, and took advantage of my raised breasts, and picked up where he left off. Licking, sucking, and biting ever so gently. I cried out, half in pleasure and half in frustration as every move I made failed.

  “Let yourself get lost in the moment, Melanie.” He looked up from my breasts and took my face in his fingers. “When was the last time you just let go?”

  God, was it so obvious I was wound up tighter than a spool of thread? Still, it seemed like an ironic request. To let go as he tied me up and held me down. I quivered as his body moved down mine and his fingers began to explore my slick arousal. I wanted to answer him. I wanted to tell him everything that led me to this very place but I couldn’t say a word.

  Not being able to justify myself felt strangely good. Freeing.

  “Let someone else take control,” he murmured before lowering his mouth between my legs. His hands reached back up to my breasts as his tongue explored inside me.

  I couldn’t even cry out.

  This was exactly what I had planned for my weekend. With Jamie. Now I was here, on the side of some Pennsylvania interstate, with a rock star I barely knew stirring my every desire. Guilt and pleasure fought to the death in my conscious.

  There could be no clear winner.

  “Why are you crying?” He asked just before his mouth met mine. I shook my head, unable to speak. “You’re breaking my heart.”

  Lightly, he wiped the tears off my cheeks with the back of his fingers. He kissed me again. I wanted so much to wrap my arms around him, but that wasn’t an option. I bucked my hips against his, and then wrapped my legs around his waist.

  He picked himself up just enough so he could enter me. I wanted to thank Jesus and any other God in heaven or the otherworld. I couldn’t even see when we were connected. Being with Ryder was like an alternate reality I didn’t even know existed. Now that I knew, I never wanted to be without it.

  Ryder groaned just before he reached his climax, collapsing on me, both of us trying to catch our breath. He smiled and kissed me on the forehead before he freed my hands. They tingled as I brought them back down on to his shoulders. Ryder slid off, and rolled me over to my side as he rubbed my arms. They tingled as blood began to flow through them normally. Balled up between us was the material he used to restrain me with.

  For some reason, I wanted to see what it was. I had to hold it close to my face to see in this dark room, but I knew what it was by smell before I could see it.

  Jamie’s tank top. My body stiffened as horror flooded through my veins.

  “What’s wrong, baby?” Ryder frowned against my cheek.

  “Absolutely nothing.” My words were little more than a breath. “You’re magical, has anyone ever told you that?”

  “You’re not so bad yourself.” He kissed me again. “I’m going to hate to leave you behind to go to stupid Michigan.”

  Again I couldn’t breathe. I couldn’t let him go.

  This was crazy. We had nothing in common besides this intense physical attraction. I was finally able to manage a few breaths, my chest rose as oxygen filled it. I knew enough about him through magazines and interviews that I had felt like I’d known him forever. I spent years trying to get to this moment. Now that I’d accepted reality, I knew why they called it fantasy. “Maybe I could come to Michigan, with you?”

  “You want to come to Michigan?” Ryder laughed. “Have you ever been there?”

  “I don’t care about Michigan. I don’t want to let you go.”

  “Don’t you have some place you need to be? Somebody waiting for you?”

  I shook my head against his shoulder.

  “You’ll certainly make Michigan more interesting.” He pulled me in close and nuzzled his face in the hollow of my neck. “What are you running from, Melanie?”

  “What the hell is she doing here?” Drake Bonham’s words alarmed me, waking me up better than any cup of coffee could at four in the morning. I tried to hide my shock and act as nonchalant as possible.

  Did I really want to explain what I was doing here? As much as I wanted a hole in the head.

  I let Ryder take the lead.

  “She’s coming with us.” Ryder didn’t look at Drake when he spoke, unaffected by the tone of his inquisition. His eyes lost in the shadow of the bill of his baseball cap, he continued playing with his phone. I stood nervously next to him as he perched on his suitcase. I wanted desperately to reach out to him for some sort of comfort. I didn’t, in fear that Drake would swat my hand like an old nun with a ruler.

  “No. Maddox, you know the rules. You double bag it and forget about the chicks when you leave town.” In Drake’s eyes, I was less important than luggage. I wondered about all the girls who followed the band around, hoping for a second of Drake’s attention would feel listening to him right now, talking about me like I was some cheap souvenir.

  Ryder sighed and shoved his phone in the pocket of his motorcycle jacket. “I’ve had enough of the rules. They’ve already cost me my kids and marriage. How much more do you expect me to give up for your band? She’s coming with us.”

  “That’s right. My band. As your boss, I’m telling you we don’t need to be transporting groupies all over the country.”

  “Don’t worry, she won’t cost you a cent. I’ll take care of her out of my per diem.”

  “She’s not coming.”

  “Either she comes with us, or I stay here with her.” The tension in the room was electric as Ryder and Drake glared at each other, almost willing each other into a full blown fist fight. The other members of the band hardly reacted, like this was a regular occurrence. Great.

  Was I willing to destroy any more lives to enter some sort of parallel witness protection plan universe?

  I was still recovering from the shock of learning that Drake regarded the other members of the band like bad children who couldn’t think for themselves. If it wasn’t for Ryder, Drake wouldn’t have ever written all of those songs, or had the success he had enjoyed.

  No wonder I always liked Ryder better. I always thought Drake was a pompous ass. What had Erin seen in him?

  Even a pretty face couldn’t excuse all that ugly.

  I put my hand on Ryder’s shoulder. “Listen, I don’t want to cause any trouble. I can meet you there instead.” It might have been a good idea anyway. Otherwise, my car would be left in the parking lot and I’d have no way to get home from wherever they left me.

  Like I could ever go home again.

  “No
. It’s no trouble at all. I want you to come with me.” He looked up at me but didn’t smile.

  I could feel the steam rolling off of Drake as he crossed his arms in front of his chest from the corner of my eye. I didn’t dare make eye contact with him, lest he incinerate me with his glare. “It’s cool, I don’t want to cost you your job or anything.”

  Drake scoffed, but we both ignored him.

  “You won’t. If you’re going to hang around with me, baby, you need to get used to Drake’s outbursts.” Finally the corners of Ryder’s mouth turned upward. I nodded and smiled, sneaking a look at Drake. He rolled his eyes and shook his head.

  An awkward silence spread over the lobby as we waited to board the bus. I tried to distract myself by looking at my phone. Friends back home were wondering how Jamie and I were faring during the storm, with some even asking if we needed anything. A friend with electricity and heat offered her house if the cold was too much to handle. All the kindness overwhelmed me. I could probably still feign being a power outage victim; it bought me some time before I had to start answering their questions.

  How long would it take before someone started looking for us because we didn’t answer them? How long before Angela’s family started searching for her, if not already?

  I attempted to focus, hard, on how excited I should be to be going on tour with my favorite band. But all I could see was Angela’s two little girls.

  I focused my thoughts again. I’d never been on a tour bus before, and I wasn’t sure what to expect. We boarded a small kitchen area first, and rows of bunks eerily stacked like coffins, filled the middle.

  “This is home.” Ryder stopped at the top bunk off to the right side. He graciously took my bag and slung it up on the bed. “The lounge area is in back, and the bathroom is right here.” He pointed to a door at the entrance to the living area. “You know the rules of the bus, right?”