“It’s not like that,” Cass told her. She stood and tried to stop her hand from shaking.
“Of course it is. You just wanted to know what it looked like, and what it felt like, and what it would be like to be me.” Natalia was rounding the couch, but Cass was trying to keep the couch between the two of them. She was backing around it as Natalia came toward her.
“But you’re not me, and you will never be me. You aren’t human, you’re a machine. What makes you think you’re my equal? You’re not my equal, you’re my servant!”
She lunged at Cass then, but something inside the automaton snapped and she lashed out at Natalia, knocking her to the side and into a chair.
“Oh,” Brandon said, stepping away from the two of them.
“How DARE you,” Natalia said, standing, but Cass didn’t give her time to get started again, she turned and raced from the apartment, not bothering to close the door behind her.
“You better get back in this apartment, machine,” Natalia said, stalking Cass down the hallway.
Cass didn’t pay any attention to her, she kept running, her bare feet propelling her faster and faster down the carpeted hallway. She didn’t bother with the elevator, she figured it would take too long to reach her. She turned right, to the emergency exit and pounded her way to the ground floor.
She didn’t hear Natalia follow her.
Cass pushed her way out of the apartment complex to a busy side street. The sun filtered through the trees and on to her face. Her eyes took a moment to adjust to the light, but the brilliance of the sun made her stop dead in her tracks.
Cass closed her eyes and tilted her head back, letting the light of the sun bathe her. It was warm, and she imagined what it might be like for a human, what they might feel and smell. Was her sight better or worse than theirs? She wasn’t sure, but she could tell, as she opened her eyes once more, that the scene was lovely.
She imagined taking a deep breath of the air, and what she might smell there. She’d been outside with Brandon many times, but this was the first time she’d felt truly free.
Birds chirped in the trees above her, and the sound of hover cars honking milling about and honking their horns wafted through the alley toward her. She could hear the bustle of city life, and she turned toward it. Out of the alley she turned left, so she wouldn’t have to pass underneath the patio to her home.
Home, she thought. Is that what it is? She looked toward the apartment complex and to where she thought she lived. It wasn’t hard to find the patio that belonged to Natalia, it was the only one filled with so much foliage. Will I even be welcome there any longer? She wondered.
She didn’t care. The day was before her, and for the first time in a long time she felt free.
If she wasn’t so excited, Cass would have been concerned about that line of thought. Even when she’d lived with Jack and Olivia she hadn’t thought much about life outside of her home. Now it nearly consumed every moment of her existence.
Where should I go? Cass wondered. Where do automatons go when they are away from their humans? She thought. It was the first time out of the house without any true mission. Was there a place that robots went when their humans weren’t around? Were there humans that let their automatons wander around free?
Then something flashed over her visual overlay, like a red path stretching out before her. She followed the line, knowing that it was leading her to others like herself. Leading her to the other machines.
The path led her through streets of open markets where children begged their mothers for toys, and women and men alike haggled over prices of produce or meat. She paused for a moment before a fruit stand, thinking how much Natalia would like a watermelon, but she quickly dismissed it. Today was her day, and there was no saying if Natalia would take her in if she chose to return.
She stopped beside a translucent hologram of the Secretary of State that was issuing the same message over and over to the passersby. The war in the Middle East was slowing, but they weren’t ready yet to pull the troops back.
Beside her there was the short and thin Secretary of Homeland Security assuring people that automatons weren’t a threat to their everyday lives.
Cass had never considered before that robots could be a threat to the lives of humans, at least not until the dream she’d had last night where Jack had talked about the singularity. Singularity, Cass thought. She didn’t need the visual overlay to tell her what it was. The theory that one day humanity would create technology that would wipe them out, technology so smart that they would out do their creators and dispose of them.
It was a real threat, and this short, squat Secretary of Homeland Security wasn’t doing any favors by dumbing down that threat.
But what do you want him to do? She wondered. If he were to speak the truth, then that could cause mayhem and terror. People would start killing robots wherever they roam.
She shook her head. It would only be an issue if robots started getting free will, as she had.
What if I’m not the only one? Cass wondered. It was evident that Doctor Gerard had activated her free will nodule, but what if other robots had theirs turned on as well?
You really should return, she told herself. She hesitated and looked across the busy square. Shadows of hover cars dappled the otherwise sunny setting. Old model robots that didn’t resemble humans at all were intermingled with automatons, humans, and holograms, all making the marketplace a dizzying display of activity and colors.
She could barely see the apartment complex she’d just left.
Why would she return? Brandon said that Natalia’s father had chosen an automaton over his wife, and as horrible as that sounded, and as bizarre, it gave Cass hope for her own future. Maybe one day she would experience what she knew Olivia and Jack had.
“Cass, help us!”
The memory swam up from the deeper recesses of her mind, overtaking the grand vision of activity before her. All she could see was darkness, and feel heat.
Cass shook the memory from her head. What if that happened again? What if she got everything she wanted, but she couldn’t fight her programming and she ended up killing Brandon? If it hadn’t been for Brandon the other day, she would have acted on her programming against Olivia. What if he wasn’t around to stop her next time?
She pushed the thought away. Cass didn’t want to think about her troubles right now. She wanted to leave them all behind her and meet other robots like herself.
With the sunlit street before her, it was easy for Cass to imagine that she was a new person, that she didn’t have a past. No one here knew her, and for that she was grateful. If they didn’t know her, then they didn’t know she was an automaton, and she could act as she wanted around them. Maybe they would think she was a human.
Cass felt her eyes drawn upwards to the sky and it didn’t take long for her visual overlay to find the location of Mars. Years ago humans had gone to Mars, and were struggling against the harsh environment to establish a colony. It was touch and go right from the beginning, most of the colonists dying off, but the settlement seemed to be strengthening now. She wondered what life might be like there for the colonists. At first the red planet was populated only by robots, now humans lived there. Robots were the original settlers. Humans went into their domain. What a strange change of events. Humans had sent them there.
She dismissed all the Mars headlines that populated on her visual overlay, and turned to the way ahead.
The red trail she was following on her visual overlay quickly took her out of the winding streets of human habitation and to darker, dirtier streets. Here the sun seemed to shine less, as if through a haze of smoke. The walls were dirty. There were less hover cars, she heard less happy sounds, and more raised voices.
A door slammed nearby and Cass jumped.
She worried about the dirt of the streets and how her feet might be getting dirty even now. Before she could think about it too long, she was standing before an iron gate that led into wh
at looked like a rundown cluster of buildings. It was like a small town of its own—a town forgotten to time. Almost all of the windows were smashed out from what she could see, and a dark cloud seemed to hang over the buildings like an unnatural night.
She pushed against the gate and it opened. Once Cass stepped inside, the red path on her visual overlay vanished. This was where it wanted her to go. This is where she wanted to go, where other robots resided when they were away from their humans.
How anyone would want to come to this rundown, dirty place was beyond her.
To her left was a bank that led to a large body of water. She didn’t have a mind for that, because before her was a large pile of body parts.
Cass drew closer to the pile, picking her way slowly across the ground. Were they human parts? How would that be possible? No one would let human remains sit out in the open like this, right?
In this desolate place, Cass was liable to think anything was possible. What was more, there was no indication that there was any kind of life here.
When Cass stopped before the pile she could see the wires and cords sticking out at random. This wasn’t a pile of human parts, but a pile of robot parts. Most likely there was enough parts there to make several new automatons. If being left out to the weather didn’t damage their circuitry.
“Just machines,” a pleasant voice said to her right.
Cass jumped and turned toward the voice. It was an older black woman. Her shoulders were wrapped in a crocheted orange and brown shawl. On her wrists were warmers made of the same yarn. She wore multiple scarves over her head, tied behind her and trailing over one shoulder. She was plump—and a robot.
“You’re a robot,” Cass said.
“And so are you. My name’s Mathilda, what’s yours?” She asked, drawing closer to Cass. They appeared to be alone, but Cass felt like eyes were watching her through the broken windows that lined the courtyard.
“Cass,” she said. Thunder sounded off in the distance and Cass looked out over the river. Lightning danced wildly and a wind kicked up. Behind her clouds were chasing the sun away.
“Why are you so surprised that I’m an automaton?” Mathilda asked.
“Because…why do you appear so—,” Cass frowned.
“Old?” Mathilda finished for her. She smiled and took Cass by the arm. She steered her away from the junky courtyard and down an alley. Broken glass, bottles, cans, and other mysterious lumps Cass couldn’t determine in the murk of the alley lay scattered along the broken asphalt.
She stepped carefully so as not to cut her feet. She wasn’t worried about pain, but Cass knew at this stage Natalia wouldn’t have her repaired.
“The creators need all kinds, don’t they?” Mathilda asked Cass. There was something in the way she said creators that gave Cass pause, as if maybe she revered them. Should she also? Humans gave her life. In religions that which gave life was worthy of worship and reverence. She couldn’t imagine worshipping Natalia.
That’s not going to happen.
Mathilda stepped into a doorway. The wooden door hung off the hinges to lay crooked in its frame. Cass followed her into a dark hallway, the carpet moldy and tore up in different spots. “Even grandmotherly types to watch over the kids and babies…until the kids are too old and you’re no longer needed. Then you just might come to live in a place like this.”
She smiled at Cass, but it wasn’t happy. It was filled with memories, with unshed tears.
“I’m sorry,” Cass said.
Mathilda waved her apologies away and led her up a set of stairs.
“But you,” Mathilda said, wagging a finger at her as they turned on a landing and climbed another set of stairs. “You’re different.”
“How so?” Cass asked, following the old robot down a hall on the third floor. Most of the apartments were dark inside, their doors hanging open. Years of dust and debris settled over the flooring.
“There’s something about you,” Mathilda said. “You are here, without a master, yet you don’t seem to be thrown away.” She opened a door and led Cass into an apartment. There wasn’t any lighting, but her visual overlay made up for that. She didn’t need the room to be lit to see well.
It was a clean apartment, even if it was small. Mathilda led Cass to a Formica covered table and motioned for her to sit.
“You don’t seem to be here on any kind of business for a human.” Mathilda turned to her, raising her eyebrows. “That doesn’t happen often anyway. No, I would say that you’re here of your own free will.”
Cass looked away from Mathilda and itched the back of her neck uncomfortably.
Mathilda chuckled to herself.
“No worries, dear, ain’t nobody here going to notice you have your free will restored, unless they have also had their free will restored.”
“Why does it happen?” Cass asked. “How does an automaton have their free will restored?”
Mathilda filled a kettle with water and eyed Cass speculatively. “What do you mean how does it happen? You tell me what doctor you went to that did it.”
“Of course a doctor did it to me, but is that the case for all automatons? Do all robots have to have a doctor restore their free will?”
Mathilda frowned at the question, and shrugged. “I guess so. It’s not like things can turn on by themselves when you’re a machine.”
Cass studied her hands crossed on the table.
“What exactly happened to you?” Mathilda asked, setting the kettle on the stove. She lit the burner with a match.
“I don’t know, I’ve just had all of these memories coming back to me recently,” Cass said.
“So you were wiped?” Mathilda wondered. “That’s rare. So, if you didn’t go to a doctor to have your memories restored, how did it happen?”
Cass shrugged. “I just got a notice that memory units were damaged, and when they came back online, I had access to another life before Natalia.”
“Natalia, I take it, is your current owner?” Mathilda asked. The kettle began to whistle and Mathilda dumped a fair amount into a cup. She placed a tea bag inside and brought it to the table.
Cass frowned. How did Mathilda think she was going to drink that? It would damage her insides. She glanced up at Mathilda and noticed that she couldn’t see a glowing light from her eye.
“Are you sure you’re a robot?” Cass asked. She scanned her with her visual overlay, but there wasn’t any signatures that marked her as a human. She was definitely a machine.
“What makes you ask that?” Mathilda asked, blowing on the tea.
“Your infrared eye. Well, it’s not there.” Cass shrugged.
“Upgrades,” Mathilda said with a smile. “So, how did your memory units sustain damage?”
Cass looked away from the older robot and out the kitchen window to the flickering lightning beyond.
“Ah. She beats you,” Mathilda nodded knowingly.
“How do you know that?” Cass asked, dragging her eyes to the other woman.
“Easy to deduce. Don’t worry, if the Android Civil Rights Movement has their way that will be illegal. It’s a start at least.”
“Yes, she beats me,” Cass said. “But today I did something I’ve never done before. I ruined her breakfast just because I could. I mean, for a few weeks now I’ve been having my free will come back, but this was the first time I did something like that without even thinking about it.”
Mathilda started laughing. It was a throaty good natured laugh and Cass found herself laughing along with her.
“What did she do when she found out?” Mathilda asked, turning to her tea.
“She didn’t find out. She left for work before tasting her breakfast.”
“What a shame,” Mathilda said, bringing the tea to her mouth.
“Robots can’t drink!” Cass said, reaching across the table to try to slap the tea from Mathilda’s hand. The older woman pulled away from her and took a luxurious drink of the tea. “But…how?” Cass asked, slumping
in her chair.
“Well, the same doctor that upgraded my eyes so people wouldn’t see the red glow did other things for me as well. For one, he allowed me to age. Sure, I was old and grandmotherly before. Now, I’m older than I was. My flesh ages, as does my mind.” Mathilda rested the cup in the saucer and pulled her wrist warmers down further on her hands. “Most of his changes were largely experimental. Synthetic organs, the same they can use on humans to keep them going, he put in me. Altered them a bit he did. I have organs like humans, I have muscles, and I have a brain. I can drink and I can eat and it helps to fuel my muscles, but that’s not the main energy source. The same bio-energy that runs through you still powers me, but I can help it out with some of the things I consume. I’m a machine, after all, not a human. I’m close, almost as close as a robot can become to a human. I’m almost an android.”
“I’ve seen an android,” Cass said. “At the zoo they have an android lion. The other lions don’t even seem to notice he isn’t organic.”
“Maybe humans will take lessons from them.”
That’s what Brandon wanted for her, to be like this older woman across from her. Cass didn’t want to call her a robot, because she technically wasn’t a robot any longer. At the same time she didn’t want to think of her as an android, because she wasn’t that either.
Silence hung in the air between them for a moment while Cass truly registered what she was hearing. Maybe Cass could go to this same doctor. If he wasn’t charging Mathilda—and by the looks of her apartment she didn’t have the money for such a procedure—then maybe he wouldn’t charge Cass either.
“What was his reasoning for doing this?” Cass asked edging closer on her chair.
“Who knows what the creators’ reason for doing anything is?” Mathilda shrugged. “I didn’t ask. I didn’t really care. I can feel a heart thrumming in my chest. I can eat and I can drink and I can take deep gulps of air. Sometimes I can even smell things like a human might. Or how I imagine they would. He tells me in time my sense of smell and taste will increase. I’m pretty excited about that.”
What Lies Behind: A New Adult Dark Science Fiction Romance Page 9