by L. P. Dover
“That’s not true. You have me and you have your new friend. Call me anytime.” She nodded toward Camden whose gaze landed on mine. “Take a good look, B. If you can’t see what I see, you’re blind.”
Turning in her arms, I hugged her tight.
“Fear keeps you from taking risks. Those risks are worth taking.”
Closing my eyes, I breathed her in and smiled. “No wonder you were best friends. That’s exactly what Braylen would say.”
“Where do you think I got it from?” she laughed.
When I opened my eyes, I thought everything would finally be okay. At least, until my parents walked through the front door. “No fucking way,” I hissed low.
Becca looked over her shoulder. “Are you still having problems with them?”
I nodded. “And I don’t think it’s going to get better anytime soon. Here we go.”
At first, my mother’s eyes went teary and wide in surprise. But when realization set in, the light in her eyes died and she grimaced. “It’s good to see you too, mother,” I said.
Her hair was long and mostly gray now. She’d aged a lot in the past few months. Braylen had followed in her footsteps by being in pageants. It was never my thing. My father, on the other hand, was a quiet man and always did my mother’s bidding. He always let her be the center of the conversation and I couldn’t stand it. My mother walked all over him and he let her.
“Your brother told me you were working. I guess I should’ve known better.”
“I’m surprised you even talked to Jason, him being so horrible and all. I guess saving my life wasn’t worth your admiration. It’s not his fault he chose the wrong person.”
She scoffed and rolled her eyes. “Can we talk about this later? This isn’t the time or place. How about we drop by your house after dinner?”
“No,” I growled low. “I’m not going to be there. In fact, I don’t think I want to see you for a while. Not until you can accept what happened and move on. You still have two kids who love you and are alive. When you begin to comprehend that, give me a call. Until then, don’t bother. I’m done.”
“Brooklyn, what’s going on?” Camden asked, coming up to my side. His arm snaked around my waist and I melted into him. It was the first time he’d touched me.
“This is a family conversation, young man,” my mother spat, noticing his arm around my waist. “I’d appreciate it if you’d see your way out of it.”
The intensity in Camden’s gaze made me tremble. He was about to lose his temper, but I squeezed his hand, snagging his attention. “Let’s just go. We can come back another time. I’ve lost my appetite anyway.” Ignoring my mother, I looked at Becca and smiled. “I’ll call you soon.”
Camden and I walked past my mother without another word, and that pissed her off. She didn’t like being dismissed, so she followed after us. “I’m not done talking to you, young lady. Get back here.”
“Just keep walking,” I said to Camden. He did as I said and helped me into his Jeep before getting in on his side.
“Do you think they’ll show up at your place tonight?”
My house, yes. The condo, most likely not, because they didn’t know I was staying there. “I don’t know.”
Camden sped us out of the parking lot and away from my bitch of a mother. Once we had some distance between us, I could breathe again. I was so glad they didn’t live around here. If they did, I probably would’ve moved already. It had been nice on the coast, not having to worry about anything when I was guarding Camden.
“You can always stay with me,” he suggested. “Or . . . I could stay with you so you don’t have to be alone.” Lifting my brows, I tilted my body toward him and pursed my lips. “And before you get all pissed thinking I’m trying to fuck you when you’re in a vulnerable position, that’s not what I’m doing.”
“You sure about that? The thought hasn’t crossed your mind?”
He pressed his lips together and kept his attention on the road. When the light turned red, he came to a stop and faced me, his gaze cloaked in darkness. “Brooklyn, let’s get something straight. The thought of fucking you has crossed my mind on more than one occasion. But the last thing I’m gonna do right now is try to get up your skirt. I can be an inconsiderate dick most of the time, but tonight’s not that night.”
“What makes tonight different from any other night?” Did he really care? Or was he playing with me like he was known to do with others?
His brows furrowed and the light turned green, drawing his attention away from me. “It just is,” he said. “Now, your place or mine?”
My stomach fluttered. “Yours.”
“DO YOU NEED anything from your place?” Camden asked when we got off the elevator.
I knew it was wrong to play the pity card, knowing my parents weren’t going to show up. But I could also kill two birds with one stone. My traitorous heart wanted to spend more time with him and my mind wanted to make sure he was safe. I was definitely taking my job to a whole new level.
“I do, actually. I need to get a couple things.”
“All right, I’ll come with you.”
I had one of my guns on me, but I wanted to get my other one for backup. Once inside, I turned on the lights. “Give me one minute and I’ll be right out. You can stay in the living room.”
He chuckled and started toward the couch. “Damn, Brooklyn. You must really not trust me. Or are you afraid that if you get me in there you won’t want to leave?”
“Ha-ha,” I muttered jokingly. It was too dangerous having him in my bedroom. I didn’t want to think about seeing him naked, or what it would be like to have him between my legs. It wasn’t going to happen. Hastily, I disappeared around the corner so he couldn’t see my flushed face.
Grabbing my gym bag, I tossed in some workout clothes for tomorrow along with my toiletry bag. It was all still put together since I’d only been in town since yesterday. I quickly changed out of my skirt and put on some comfortable clothes. All I needed were my guns and I was set to go.
“And just so you know,” I called out, brushing my hair back into a ponytail. “I usually trust people until they give me a reason not to.” Finished, I turned the corner and saw Camden in the living room, walking around. His shirt was unbuttoned, revealing the white tank top and tattoos that adorned his upper chest. My insides clenched. When his gaze caught mine, he slowly raked his eyes down my body and then back up.
“I’m not the kind of guy you can trust, Brooklyn. It’d do well for you to remember that,” he murmured low.
I slung the bag over my shoulder and started toward the door. He wasn’t scaring me. “I’m not worried,” I said. “I can handle myself. I’ve dealt with a lot worse than you could ever imagine.”
He snorted. “I highly doubt that. If you knew the things I’d done you wouldn’t be standing in this room with me.”
Opening the door, I stepped out into the hallway and kept my eyes solely on his when the door shut behind him. “You’re not scaring me, Cam. Redemption is around every corner, you just have to be willing to work for it.”
Shaking his head, he broke eye contact and faced his door. “It’s too late. There’s no hope for me.” He opened his door and stalked inside.
His condo was different from mine, more upscale and modern. The guy who Mason borrowed it from had some money to his name. Most of his friends were loaded, including Camden, who had more money than I’d earn in a lifetime. Must be nice.
He took off for the kitchen, opened a beer and guzzled it down.
“It’s never too late,” I called out.
“Maybe for you.” I joined him in the kitchen and watched him down two more beers in rapid succession. “Do you want something to eat? I’m fucking starved.” He pulled out a frozen pizza from the freezer and ripped the box open.
My stomach growled in response and I nodded. Now that I was away from my parents, my appetite was back.
Once the oven was ready, he put in the pizza and we
retreated to the living room. Camden was now on his fourth beer with two more on the coffee table, ready to be opened. “Do you mind?” I asked, nodding toward them.
He grabbed one and opened it for me. “You don’t look like the type to drink beer. I pictured you as more of a wine girl.”
I laughed and took a huge gulp. “Nope. Straight liquor is usually my thing. Takes the edge off quicker.”
“Is working with kids really that bad?”
I took another sip and smiled. “You have no idea.”
“I’m surprised you’re not drinking it up after what happened with your mother tonight. Want to talk about it?”
The timer to the pizza went off so I jumped up and went to the kitchen. “I tell you what. After we eat, I’ll tell you all about it. It’s not something I like to talk about.”
Camden grabbed two more beers and set them on the counter while I pulled out the pizza. “You don’t have to,” he murmured. “I just know how girls like to talk about their feelings.”
I swatted him with the oven mitt and he chuckled. “Hey, that’s not always true. I never talk about my feelings. Becca’s the one who suggested I talk to someone. I figured since you’re getting drunk, I could talk to you and you’ll forget it all by morning.”
“Good point,” he said, tilting another beer back.
He finished his beer and grabbed two slices of pizza for us both and set them on plates. If he kept it up, he was going to be passed out before I could even talk. Or maybe I could get him to open up the more he drank. Camden carried our plates to the living room and put them on the coffee table. My stomach growled and it didn’t take long to scarf down my two slices.
Once Camden was done, he sat back on the couch with another beer in his hand. He was relaxed, I could tell by the lazy grin on his face. “Talk to me,” he commanded. “Tell me something I don’t know.”
“The only way I’m going to do that is if you do it in return,” I challenged.
He shrugged and took another chug of his beer. “You’re first.”
Taking a deep breath, I turned my body to face him and pulled my legs up onto the couch. “My sister died seven months ago.”
“What happened?”
The memories came flooding back and so did the pain. I pulled out my phone and found the last picture my sister and I took together. It was the night before she died. “This is her,” I said, passing him the phone.
His eyes went wide. “Holy fuck, was she your twin?”
Shaking my head, I took the phone and set it on the table. “No, but we were only seventeen months apart. She was the youngest.”
“I can’t imagine the loss. Do you want to talk about it?”
I looked down at my clasped hands which were now turning white from squeezing them so hard. “Braylen was leaving for the Miss United States pageant, so we went to a party with a bunch of our friends to celebrate the night before. She was so happy.” I paused to collect myself. “On the way home, the road was dark and it was hard to see. A deer shot out in front of the car and Bray tried to avoid it. She lost control and we flipped a few times, before ending in a ditch.”
Camden put his beer down and turned away from me, placing his head in his hands. “So you survived and she didn’t.”
“That’s the fucked up part,” I said. “We were strapped in our seatbelts, hanging upside down. It was so cold that night and I remember shaking uncontrollably. Bray’s eyes were closed and there was blood everywhere. I screamed her name over and over until I felt her hand in mine. She squeezed and I remember thanking God she was alive.
“It wasn’t long before car lights started to come down the street, along with the sound of sirens. I kept telling her to hang in there, that help was coming. And then her hand grew limp. I couldn’t turn my head to see her. I was stuck. I screamed at her to squeeze my hand, but she didn’t.”
Camden kept his head down but I had to keep going. I had to get it out. “My brother was actually the first one there. I could hear his voice, then the car caught on fire. I can feel the heat from those flames even now.”
I closed my eyes and felt arms wrap around me. Camden had moved over and pulled me into his chest. Tears fell and soaked his undershirt, but he didn’t care. He held me tighter.
“Jason was able to get me out before the flames engulfed the car. Long story short, my mother’s mad at my brother for getting me out and not my sister. Braylen was her favorite.”
“Believe me,” he growled. “I know what that’s like.” Not only could I hear it, I could feel his anger rising.
Pulling out of his arms, I looked up at him. “Cam, are you okay?”
He shot up to his feet and finished off his beer before throwing it across the room, shattering a picture frame on the wall. What the hell was going on? Pacing the floor, he fisted his hands in his hair, almost like a caged lion. I didn’t know what set him off, but I took a gamble and slowly crept up behind him and put my hand on his arm.
“Cam, calm down. I’m sorry for telling you, but you should know it actually felt good to talk about it. What’s going on?”
The muscles in his arm relaxed and he turned to face me, his gaze raw and sad. “I watched my father die,” he revealed.
I gasped. In his record, his father died in a motorcycle accident. I didn’t know he was there. “Oh my God,” I murmured. “I’m so sorry.”
He huffed, nodding quickly. “Yeah, it was pretty fucked up. The guy who hit him was texting and drove into his lane. I watched the whole thing happen. Afterward, I snapped.”
“What did you do?”
“While my father laid on the ground bleeding to death, I ripped the driver out of his car and started beating the fuck out of him. I wanted to kill him and I almost did.”
“What stopped you?”
“My brother, my twin actually. He pulled me off the guy, but only after my father had already died on the road. I spent the last minutes of my father’s life in a blind rage. I didn’t even get to say goodbye.”
“Where is your brother now?” I asked softly even though I knew.
“He doesn’t talk to me.”
“Why not?”
Angrily, he threw his hands in the air and moved away from me. “Because I fuck things up,” he spat. “That’s what I do, Brooklyn. I fuck things up. Tell me, were you ever jealous of your sister? Did you hate her for being your parent’s favorite?”
“Every sibling goes through that. I bet your brother was jealous of you.”
“Hardly,” he scoffed. “He always got what he wanted. He has everything and I have nothing.”
I wanted to tell him all the wonderful things he had, and show him he was just as rich in life as his brother. But I couldn’t do that. Not without telling him who I was. “That’s not true, Cam. One of these days you’re going to realize what you have.”
“How can you say that? You don’t even know me or what I’ve done.”
“Then show me,” I shouted. “Stop pushing everyone away when they only want to help you.”
“Fine.” He ripped off his shirts, baring his scarred and tattooed skin. They were on his arms, across his chest, and all over his back. He must have done some heavy fighting at the Dark Side. “Do you see all of this?” he asked angrily. “I got them all from fighting, from hurting people. It’s what I do. It’s who I am. I’m a monster, Brooklyn. People are scared of me. And for the life of me, I don’t know why you aren’t.”
I reached up to touch him and faltered when he jerked away. “Stop, Cam. Please let me do this.” Breathing hard, he stood there, clenching his teeth, while I traced the scar on his face. “If I can see past your scars, I know those close to you can too. If you’d let them, that is.”
He closed his eyes and leaned into my touch. “My brother will never forgive me for what I did. Just like your mother will never stop being angry for losing her daughter.”
“It’s possible, but you know what helps me through it?”
He opened his eyes.
“What?”
“Hope. And I will continue to hope for as long as I live. All is not lost.” Stepping back, I took a deep breath and kept my eyes on him. “Thank you for opening up to me. I didn’t realize how deep your scars actually went.” My hands shook as I brought them down to the hem of my shirt. He showed me his scars and now it was time for me to reciprocate.
Camden’s eyes went wide. “What are you doing?”
“You showed me who you are, now I’m showing you who I am.” In one quick move, I lifted my T-shirt and let it fall to the floor, my breaths coming out in pants. Closing my eyes, I twirled around slowly so he could see the melted skin on my back. No one had seen it except me.
With my back to him, I didn’t know what was written on his face. Disgust? Pity? What I didn’t expect was to feel his fingers gliding across my mangled skin. My body trembled and a tear slid down my cheek. It wasn’t easy exposing myself.
“Why didn’t it work out with Blake?” he asked.
By the tone in his voice, he already knew. “I was still grieving over my sister,” I told him.
“And?”
I sighed. “And I didn’t want him to see my body. I thought it would turn him off. So I pushed him away until I could come to terms with what happened. I guess I can’t blame him for cheating. This is the first time anyone’s seen the damage.”
“If he really cared about you he wouldn’t have stuck his dick somewhere he shouldn’t have.”
“Would you have been able to wait?” He started to say something and then stopped. The silence was deafening. “I didn’t think so.”
Placing his hands on my shoulders, he turned me around, roughly. “Look at me.” He waited until my eyes met his. “I wouldn’t have waited on you because I didn’t give a damn about anyone other than myself. I’m not the kind of guy to fall in love.”
“What about now? What if you were in love with me?”
His blue eyes searched mine. “If I was in love with you, I wouldn’t just wait, I’d be by your side doing everything I could to bring you back to me.”
My breath hitched and my heart thundered so achingly hard in my chest. I was falling too fast and there was no way I’d get out if I didn’t turn back. With the way Camden looked at me, it was already too late. I placed my hands over his and lifted up on my toes.