by Sarah Bailey
It took a long time for me to drift off and when I finally did, I was only plagued with dreams of his maddening touch. When I awoke, I cursed the day I’d laid eyes on him and his stupidly handsome but deadly face.
From this day forward, Logan Benson would be my nemesis. And in my heart, I knew he would be my downfall too.
Chapter Twelve
I asked myself every day for the next two weeks why I could not rid myself of the unwanted urge to see her face. Perhaps I lacked distractions with Ant being away on his honeymoon. Or maybe I wanted to know how much trouble she’d got in with her parents over me. Or perhaps she was right. We were both liars. Lying about this strange connection between us.
Either way, I fucking hated it. Everything about it.
I especially hate myself for finding her social media and stalking it. Her profiles were heavily locked down so I couldn’t discover much. And I would not ask my uncle to help me with getting access. Brent was good with those sorts of things but it wasn’t okay. Plus he would ask too many questions. Dad had already got suspicious after my run-in with Aurora’s parents. He hadn’t said anything since the wedding but I could feel the judgement there.
This was such a fucking mess. I’d lost my mind over this maddening sixteen-year-old. And I wanted to punish her for it. It was the most insane part. The fact I even wanted to go after her. It had a lot to do with the way she’d tried to save me from her father. I had to begrudgingly respect her for it. The girl could have thrown me to the wolves, but she didn’t. I wanted to know why. Not to mention the way she’d called me out.
I could admit it. I wanted her in ways I shouldn’t. I wanted to take everything from her. Break down her walls and force her into revealing all her secrets. I wanted inside her head as much as I wanted to strip her bare and… no, do not say it. How could I not? Aurora was beautiful. A fucking stunning girl with her silky hair and dark eyes. I could drown in those brown eyes staring at me with such fire and hatred.
Why did I want her so much when it was clear we despised each other?
It was probably exactly why. I liked the way she challenged me. Aurora wasn’t a simpering girl making the eyes at me because of my family, my money and the company I stood to inherit. She didn’t care about any of it. She came from money and power herself. Her family might rarely be seen in public, but everyone who was anyone knew about the Syndicate. It’s why I even applied for membership in the first place, to prove to myself I could gain access to the elite. Stupid really. It was another diversion. One of many I used to feel alive, except all of it merely made me feel empty and hollow.
I realised how pathetic it sounded. Everyone who doesn’t have money thinks it’s the answer to their problems. Little do they know money doesn’t make you happy. It doesn’t give you fulfilment. Yes, it makes your life easier. Gives you access to things you never thought possible. But most of it is meaningless bullshit. Stuff you begin to realise doesn’t really matter. It’s all so superficial. This life I lived.
To others, I probably sounded like an over-privileged stuck-up fuck complaining about my life, when I wanted for nothing. I had a wonderful family who loved fiercely. Who protected each other with their lives.
Why did I feel empty?
Why did I feel like my life was a waste of fucking time?
Why did she make me feel alive for the first time in years?
I’d had enough of thinking about her. Of wishing to see her. I was plain done with this shit.
I walked out onto the shop floor of Bensons, intending to check everything was running smoothly. It only took a few minutes for me to stop dead in the middle of the racks of clothes. Standing in the lobby area by the front doors was a group of six teenaged girls. They wouldn’t have registered with me if I hadn’t seen a glimpse of dark hair with subtle curls. Her demeanour was stiff as if she had no intention of coming here. Her eyes darted around, betraying how uncomfortable she was. And when they landed on me, they widened. Her already pale skin went white. I tilted my head to the side, wondering why the world had decided to give me what I wanted. It brought her to me.
Aurora kept staring at me and I, her. My feet were glued to the spot. I couldn’t move even if I wanted to. For some fucked up reason, I wanted to bask in her image. I hated this girl to the core but I couldn’t deny she made me feel for the first time in years.
She leant over to another girl with her and whispered something. The blonde girl nodded and went back to her other friends. The five of them walked away towards the racks whilst Aurora took a breath. Then she strode towards me, her hands fisted at her sides. I couldn’t say a damn thing as she reached me with my mouth having gone dry.
“Before you start accusing me of things, I didn’t come here to see you. My friends wanted to look since they’re obsessed with the latest collection.”
I unstuck my tongue from the roof of my mouth.
“I know.”
She blinked as if not expecting what came out of my mouth. It was clear Aurora hadn’t wanted to come anywhere near this building nor me.
“Oh… then why are you looking at me like that?”
“Like what?”
“Like I did something wrong.”
She was far too blunt for her own good. I tried to re-frame my expression in an attempt not to look so fierce. It’s not as if I had any real quarrel with Aurora now other than she’d got stuck in my mind like a fucking leech. She wouldn’t leave my thoughts. And yes, I wanted to take it out on her, but what kind of person would it make me?
“I was surprised to see you.”
“Trust me, I’m as displeased by it as you are.”
Is she? I’m not exactly displeased, more… god, I don’t even know what I am right now.
All I knew was we were in a public space and I didn’t want to be. A part of me wanted her alone to ask her what happened with her parents. To find out if she got in trouble because of me.
“Aurora.”
She stared up at me. Today she wasn’t wearing heels so she only came up to my chest.
“Yes?”
“Will you come with me to my office?”
“Why on earth would I do that?”
If I dragged her there, it would make me look like the fucking boar I’d been the last time she was here.
“We need to talk.”
Her brows furrowed.
“I don’t think we have anything left to say to each other, Logan. You don’t like me. I don’t like you. End of discussion.”
I might not like her, but I still wanted her. Fuck did I want her. Seeing her. Having her next to me made me feel all sorts of crazy shit I shouldn’t be. My fingers twitched and I couldn’t help myself. I needed her alone away from prying eyes.
I reached out on instinct, my hand curling around her bicep. Aurora’s eyes fell on it.
“Come with me.”
“No.”
“Yes.”
I tugged her towards the staff doors. Aurora didn’t dig her heels in. For some reason, she let me take her away from the shop floor despite saying no.
I knew having her alone with me would be a fucking mistake, but I no longer cared. The girl who’d plagued me for weeks was here. I threw all caution, rationality and common sense out the window, driven by the need to see what the fuck it was about her which made me so crazy.
I shut the office door behind us, flicking the lock and letting go of her arm. She stared up at me, having not moved an inch from where we’d stopped. It only made me step closer, getting right up in her personal space.
“What do you want, Logan?”
I reached up and tucked my fingers under her chin, stroking them along her jaw.
“Did you get in trouble with your parents?”
She wrinkled her nose.
“Why would you care about that?”
“I just do, so tell me.”
Any explanation I had sounded ridiculous to my ears. I blamed myself for a lot of the shit which
went down on my cousin’s wedding. I’d chased after her. I’d forced her against the sinks and wanted to do bad things to her beautiful body. It was on me.
“Sort of. My dad wasn’t happy. Has he revoked your membership?”
I shook my head. I hadn’t heard anything from the Syndicate and when I’d checked, my membership was still active.
“I told him not to. I didn’t want to get you in trouble.”
Her admission made my fingers still on her jaw. I didn’t know why she hadn’t pushed me away either.
“You didn’t?”
“Contrary to what you might think, Logan, I’m not a heartless bitch. I have a share of the blame here, so no, I don’t want my dad coming after you. He can be overprotective, stubborn and doesn’t take kindly to anything untoward happening to me. It wouldn’t be pretty if he did decide you were a threat to me.”
“I don’t think you’re a heartless bitch.”
I didn’t know what I thought of her other than she drove me insane with longing for things I couldn’t have.
“Well, I still think you’re heartless.”
Somehow, her words only made me smile.
“Is that so?”
“Yes. You say cruel things without a care for how much you’ll hurt the other person.”
“Did I hurt you?”
My fingers resumed stroking her chin. Her pupils dilated and her breathing hitched.
“Yes.”
I leant closer, tugged by an invisible cord.
“I’m not sorry.”
And I wasn’t. She’d provoked me. Perhaps I was heartless like she’d said. Who the fuck cared any longer? I wasn’t apologetic for who I was.
“Trust me, I’m aware of how un-sorry you are.”
She slapped my hand away from her chin, glaring at me. The fire in her eyes only made me want her more.
Why the fuck was I attracted to a girl who hated me?
Why did I want to break her and bend her to my will so badly?
I tucked my hand around the back of her neck instead, cradling her head and forcing it back further. She reached up again as if to tear my hand away. I captured her wrist with my other hand and pulled it behind her back, forcing her closer to me.
“You never did answer my question.”
“What question?” she hissed.
“Have you been kissed?”
Her eyes widened and her lips parted.
“It’s none of your business.”
“I think you’ll find it is.”
I wanted to know if anyone had touched her in the ways I craved. It shouldn’t be important to me to be the first to take from her, but it was.
You are fucked up.
I was fully aware of how low I was sinking. No part of me gave a shit any longer. She was here and I was going to have what I wanted.
“Then you tell me. Do you think I’ve been kissed?”
Her voice was taunting. Dangerous, considering how compromised she was right then.
“No. I don’t believe you’d allow anyone that liberty.”
“Then there’s your answer.”
I smiled wide, leaning ever closer until my nose touched hers. She swallowed as if realising my intentions.
“It’s such a pity for you.”
“What is?”
“I’m going to take liberties and there’s nothing you can do to stop me.”
My mouth landed on hers, flooding me with urgency the moment our lips met. Aurora stiffened in my hold, her free hand coming up and grasping my forearm. It only made me press her harder against me, feeling her body mould to mine. I tipped her head slightly, giving me better access to her mouth. She wriggled as if trying to get away but her lips were moving against mine, albeit tentatively.
Fuck. What am I doing?
This was madness, but I wanted to follow the crazy down its winding path.
I wanted to get lost in its fucked up maze.
I wanted her.
My tongue probed the seam of her lips, demanding she give herself up to me. I gripped the back of her neck tighter, making it very clear she was to obey. Her mouth parted and I dove in, my tongue curling with hers, tasting her bittersweetness. Everything about this fucked up kiss was exactly that. Bittersweet. I might be enjoying taking from her right now, but when we parted, this could never happen again. I had to remind myself of who she was and why I couldn’t indulge in everything she had on offer.
I felt rather than heard her muffled moan in my mouth as I continued to take her first kiss. I continued to fucking well devour her mouth and show her exactly how much she’d been missing out on.
I let go of her hand behind her back to curl mine around her behind and press her against my length because fuck if she hadn’t made me hard. Aurora reached up and tangled her fingers in my hair, rubbing herself against me in this wanton manner. I hadn’t expected it from an inexperienced girl, but hell if I didn’t want more.
You should stop. This can’t go on.
My mind screamed at me but I ignored it. All I could feel and taste was her. If I let her go, this would be over. This delicious torturous pleasure. So, I didn’t stop. I kept my hand on her backside. I kept kissing her until both of us were breathless and panting in each other’s mouths. Only then did I release her slightly. Aurora’s eyes were closed and her chest heaved against mine. Her lips were swollen from my ministrations. The sight of it almost drove me to press her against my desk and have my way with her even further.
I kissed my way down her jaw, feeling her shuddering from the touch.
“I think you like my cruelty,” I whispered against her skin, “You’re a little masochist.”
Her only response was a harsh pant. I was right. Deep down, the way I gave her a hard time turned her on as much as her daring words did me. Her very presence was a fucking drug.
“I know what you want, Aurora Knox.”
“What?” she whispered, her voice all breathy and fuck if it didn’t taunt me. Everything about her did, especially now I knew exactly how she tasted like bittersweet sin.
“To be my pretty little toy.”
I knew exactly what I was doing by saying that to her. Aurora opened her eyes as I pulled back. Shock ran through her and it took a second before she wrenched herself out of my grasp. The slap came next, the noise of her palm hitting my cheek ricocheting around the room. I supposed I deserved it after what I’d said. I merely smiled at her in response.
“Fuck. You.”
“Hmm, I know you’d love it if I did… if I fucked you.”
Her fists clenched at her sides and her eyes were wild with anger and lust. It made me want to kiss her again, but I didn’t think she’d let me this time.
“If you think for a second I am ever going to allow you to do that, you’re delusional.”
“You let me kiss you. In fact, you kissed me back, rubbing yourself all over me and moaning. You can lie and tell me you didn’t like it, but we both know it’s not true.”
Her mouth dropped open.
“I know you’re going to walk out that door cursing me to high heaven, but deep down, you’ll remember every second of our encounter. You’ll think about it when you fall asleep and wish I’d taken it further. You’ll imagine I sat you on my desk and did to you what you’ve refused to allow yourself to want.” I reached up and stroked her cheek. “Here’s what’s going to happen. You’re going to wait and save yourself for me. Deep down, you want me to make you my toy. You’ll never be anything else to me. This isn’t a love story. I’ll make you fucking bend to me no matter how much you resist.”
I sounded like an absolute psychopath and I felt like one too. This girl did something fucked up to me. I didn’t care to deny or hide it.
“You’re crazy.”
Her whispered voice shook on her words, then she swallowed hard and glared at me. “You’re fucking crazy,” she told me, her voice louder this time, “I don’t want anyt
hing from you. I never have and I never will.”
I grinned and continued to stroke her cheek, noticing she hadn’t pushed me away or told me to stop.
“Your protests only make it all the more obvious. You want me, but you’re too scared to admit it. Still a little liar.”
“I’m not the only one lying in this room.”
I scraped my teeth along my bottom lip, a movement she watched with rapt attention.
“I would only be lying if I told you I didn’t want those things too.” I gripped her chin. “I want you on your knees in front of me. It’s where you belong. One day, I will make you my little toy.”
I had no idea where the fuck all of this had come from. Only Aurora made the dark side of me come out to play. All of her taunting and refusal to back down had only pushed me over the edge. No doubt I shouldn’t be telling a girl her age I wanted to make her into a toy for my amusement, but we were beyond anything normal now.
“You listen here, Logan, if you think I’m going to bow to a man, you’re mistaken.” Her lip curled up into a sneer. “You are the very last man I’d ever want attention from. So no, I won’t be begging. I won’t be saving myself for you. And I certainly won’t be your toy. Quite frankly, you can wish and wonder all you want about what it’d be like to have me. It’s never going to happen.”
The way she sounded completely confident and secure in her words had me wondering if she meant them. Perhaps right now she did. Later, she’d rethink everything. She’d remember how she’d rubbed herself against me and let me kiss her so thoroughly, she’d been breathless when I was done. Then she’d realise how much she wanted me.
“If you say so. We’ll have to see, won’t we?”
“There’s nothing to fucking see. This is the last time you and I will ever lay eyes on each other.”
I merely shrugged and dropped my hand from her face.
“You can believe that all you want, but when you’re an adult, Aurora, you’ll be back. You won’t be hiding behind your family and cowardice any longer. You’ll remember today and how much you wanted me to kiss you. How you wanted more. I’ll be waiting when you decide to admit the truth.”
She glared at me, but I could see the cogs turning in her head. Aurora Knox didn’t back down from a challenge. She would come crawling to me. She’d get down on her knees. She’d beg. And I’d indulge her because fuck, if I didn’t want her. I was done denying the truth. I wanted this girl more than I wanted anything else in my life. She made me feel alive again.