Try to Remember
Page 33
Reading Group Guide
1. Gabriela, Evi, and Roberto betray one another at pivotal moments throughout this novel. How do these betrayals transform the characters and illuminate the difference between love and loyalty in relationships?
2. At one point in the novel, Gabriela is introduced to the four forms of love—storge, philos, eros, and agape—in the Greek classification system and later comes to wonder whether the four are equally as important. Is this question ultimately resolved in the novel?
3. Roberto’s immigration experience is depicted as more difficult in certain ways than that of other family members. How do his and his family’s acculturation difficulties affect their ability to distinguish what is “normal” behavior from what is not when he begins to change?
4. Why do the characters in this family go to such lengths to avoid exposing Roberto’s mental illness to the outside world? Are there external social factors that drive some immigrant families to hide their problems and avoid seeking help from institutions designed to help them, such as the police, child protection agencies, and welfare providers?
5. Gabriela’s beliefs about adult womanhood are formed in part by her exposure to two significant role models—her traditional mother, Evi, and the nontraditional or “feminist” model, Lara. What do Gabriela’s observations about both of these characters’ compromises in relationships with men teach her about her path and choices as a woman?
6. The deportation threat faced by this family of lawful immigrants illustrates the fragility of lawful permanent residents’ membership in the society that they’ve ostensibly been permitted to join permanently. Is Gabriela’s belief that this is a “double standard” the reason she chooses to disobey some laws later on in the story?
7. South Florida, especially the Miami metropolitan area, under-goes a major transformation during the time frame of the novel (1968–1971). Which of these changes, both positive and negative, affect Gabriela the most and why? What insights does she gain as a result of her interactions with Cuban and Jewish people that help shape her own identity?
8. Gabriela’s struggle with her losses launches her on a quest to understand and preserve the cultures of disappearing civilizations throughout the world. What, in the experience of loss, fuels this passion in her?
Guía para grupos de lectura
1. En algunos momentos claves de esta novela se traicionan Gabriela, Evi, y Roberto el uno contra el otro. ¿De qué manera se transforman los personajes a raíz de ello y se alumbra la diferencia entre el amor y la lealtad en una relación?
2. Hay un momento en que a Gabriela se le informa que hay cuatro tipos de amor según el sistema de clasificación de los griegos—storge, philos, eros, y ágape—y luego ella se pregunta si los cuatro tienen el mismo valor. ¿Se resuelve esta duda al final de la novela?
3. La experiencia migratoria de Roberto se representa como más difícil que la de sus familiares. ¿Cómo les afectan estas dificultades de asimilación en cuanto a poder distinguir entre un comportamiento “normal” y uno no normal cuando Roberto empieza a cambiar?
4. ¿Por qué luchan tanto los personajes en esta familia para no revelar fuera de ella la enfermedad mental de Roberto? ¿Existen elementos externos en la sociedad que conducen a ciertas familias inmigrantes a ocultar sus problemas y a no pedirle ayuda a las instituciones creadas para proveer asistencia, tal como la policía y las agencias de protección de niños y del bienestar público?
5. Las creencias de Gabriela sobre lo que significa ser una mujer adulta se realizan en parte por ser expuesta a dos importantes modelos a imitar—el papel tradicional de madre que desempeña Evi y el feminista que desempeña Lara. ¿Qué aprende Gabriela con respecto a su propio camino y sus opciones como mujer cuando observa lo que ambas mujeres han transigido en sus relaciones con sus hombres?
6. El riesgo de la deportación enfrentado por esta familia de inmigrantes legales demuestra lo frágil que es ser miembro de una sociedad que supuestamente le permite al inmigrante permanente legal pertenecer permanentemente. ¿Es esta doble moral la razón por la cual Gabriela luego decide desobedecer algunas leyes?
7. Un gran desarrollo ocurre en el sur de la Florida, sobretodo en el área metropolitana de Miami, durante el periodo transcurrido por la novela (1968–1971). ¿Cuáles de estos cambios, tanto positivos como negativos, afectan más a Gabriela y por qué? ¿Qué conocimientos adquiere ella como resultado de sus interacciones con las personas cubanas y judías que le ayudan a formar su propia identidad?
8. La lucha interna de Gabriela en cuanto a sus pérdidas la lanza en una búsqueda mayor de las culturas de aquellas civilizaciones del mundo que van desapareciendo para lograr entender y conservarlas. ¿Qué hay en la experiencia del perder que conmueve esta pasión en ella?
[ ABOUT THE AUTHOR ]
IRIS GOMEZ is an award-winning writer and nationally recognized expert on the rights of immigrants in the United States. She is the author of two poetry collections, Housicwhissick Blue (Edwin Mellen Press, 2003) and When Comets Rained (Custom-Words, 2005), and the recipient of a prestigious national poetry prize from the University of California. Her work is widely published in a variety of literary magazines and other periodicals.
A respected public interest immigration lawyer and law school lecturer, she has represented civil rights groups and individuals in high impact cases and won professional awards for her accomplishments—including a Las Primeras award for Latina trailblazers in Massachusetts. She has frequently been called upon to write and speak on immigration-related topics and has appeared in the media, including on the nationally televised Cristina show and Boston’s celebrated bilingual late-night radio program ¡Con Salsa!
An immigrant from Cartagena, Colombia, she spent her formative years in Miami, Florida, and has also lived in New York City, Michigan, and throughout the Pacific Northwest. She and her family now make their home in the Boston area.
Try to Remember draws on her personal experiences growing up as a Latina in Miami, during the peak of the Cuban diaspora, as well as on her substantial experiences as an immigration lawyer. Along with her professional work aiding immigrants in improving their legal status in the United States she has had to contend with the difficult issues involved in the deportation of lawful residents from the United States. Often wrenching for the affected families, these deportations have increased dramatically because of changes in laws that have significantly expanded the reasons for which a person might lose his or her legal status and even face permanent exile.
Some of the transcendent themes she explores in Try to Remember include the question of what “love” means in a family, and particularly the potential conflicts that may arise for a young woman between the ethic of family loyalty, such as that present in many Latino families, and the ethic of independence perceived as necessary for a woman to achieve career success. Try to Remember is also a love story—a story about the power and beauty of love in a Latino family, even though it may be struggling.
If you enjoyed Try to Remember, then you’re sure to love these emotional family dramas as well—
Now available from Grand Central Publishing.
A secret journal threatens to destroy a young Colombian-American woman as she uncovers the truth about her mother’s past in this stunning debut novel.
Look for future books from Leila Cobo.
“An intricately woven tale of love and memory from a deeply talented writer.”
—Booklist
“López’s engaging novel chronicles how four sisters’ lives are shaped by the loss of their mother and their belief that they were granted magical abilities.”
—Publishers Weekly
Look for future books from Lorraine López.
it-filter: grayscale(100%); -moz-filter: grayscale(100%); -o-filter: grayscale(100%); -ms-filter: grayscale(100%); filter: grayscale(100%); " class="sharethis-inline-share-buttons">share