My Stupid Girl

by Smith, Aurora

  It was like my life had become perfect, except it was missing something. Someone. It was missing Lucy herself. I didn’t miss the firecrackers that went off every time I saw or touched her as much as I just missed my friend. Lucy had become my best friend, and I missed seeing her amazing blue eyes and listening to her constant babble. It was so weird to have this big event of meeting my birth parents and not being able to talk about it or share it with Lucy.

  I gave Lucy a lot of thought as I flew back home. It had been six months since I’d seen her and, for all I knew, she had a new boyfriend and they were deeply in love. But maybe not. I really believed, still, that she had been in love with me when we were together. I just didn’t know if she still was. Sometimes I would pat my chest to feel the little ring that hung on a long chain around my neck, under my shirt. It was like my own little secret I kept to myself, the one that said I still wanted what she had offered me, just not yet.

  I figured I could call her, what was the harm in that? Even if she was with someone else, there was no reason I couldn’t call a friend and tell her about my weekend with my parents. I knew that if I heard her sounding happy that that would make my weekend complete. I set my jaw determinedly and decided that, once the plane landed, I was going to call Lucy. Excitement started building in my chest as I thought about hearing that sweet voice and answering all the questions she would ask about my birth parents.

  Once I was able to turn my phone back on at the gate, I saw that I had a voicemail from my grandma.

  “Davie, Johnny is coming to get you. I am not feeling so well, so I asked him. I can’t wait to see you, hon.” This was different, and not good. The once spry, independent old lady had been sick a lot lately. Strength that she’d had only a few months ago was fading fast and I felt like a helpless onlooker. I had been toying with the idea of getting a home-health nurse to come over regularly, someone who could help Grandma shower and do all of those things that she refused my help on. I would do anything for that woman, but I wanted her to feel comfortable. This was one area where I knew she would protest and throw a hissy fit, but we were at the point where she needed it. And hopefully, with her fleeting strength, she would give up faster and give in to me and a nurse helping. With that decision made, back to business.

  I looked down at my phone, went to favorites, and pressed Lucy’s name. My heart started pounding again. What was I going to say if she picked up? Hi? Hey? Hello Lucy? Can we please make up and pretend that sexual request slash violent outburst thing never happened?

  I should have thought about this before I just up and called.

  But then again, if I had thought about it I probably wouldn’t have called. It was better this way; I just had to get it done. I was disappointed when I heard her voice message, but my ears burned when they heard that familiar voice.

  “This is Lucy. Leave a message.”

  “Hey, Luce. It’s me, David. I just wanted to call and tell you that I met my birth parents this weekend. It was amazing. Call me when you get this; I would love to talk to you. I umm, I miss you.”

  I hung up and felt like puking. If I could invent a time machine I would do that over again. Shaking it off, I turned the corner from the security checkpoint expecting to see Johnny’s freckled face excitedly looking for me, ready to tell me some story about how amazing Jennika was. Instead, I saw a tall slender girl and bright purple hair tipped with black. She was bundled into a defiant stance against the wall. Black lipstick sharply defined her lips, red eye shadow screamed across her eyelids, and a purple spike protruded from her pierced nose. Fishnet tights, jean shorts, and huge, sloppily laced boots completed the look.

  “Michelle, what are you doing here?” I hugged the little freak as I spoke. She hugged me back but pushed at me quickly and started smacking her gum loudly.

  “Look at you, sell out.” Her eyes automatically rolled at my new appearance. No answer came next; she just grabbed my carry-on, rolling it behind her as she walked off.

  “I thought Johnny was coming?”

  “Yeah, well Johnny had a date so he put the job on Isaiah, who then called me telling me that he was starting to feel sick from all those pain meds, so I was the last choice, but the only one who actually wanted to get you. That’s life, preppy.” She winked at me, chewing gum obnoxiously, completely open-mouthed. I laughed and put my arm around her like I always did. Well, like I did before I met Lucy.

  “Hey now! How’s your girlfriend going to feel about this?” She poked me in the ribs. But instead of pulling away she put her arm around my side.

  “You’re a jerk.”

  “I know.” Her grin was wicked.

  “So, what are we doing tonight, pretty boy?” Michelle looked hopefully at me, forgetting to make out with her gum and give me a mean face.

  “I was just thinking of going home and making sure my grandma was okay.” I felt tired and depressed after the message about Grandma. Then getting worked up about calling Lucy and just getting her voicemail. Emotional mood swings made me grumpy.

  “She’s fine, let her sleep. Let’s do something. When’s the last time we hung out?”

  “When we were fourteen, maybe.”

  “That’s what I’m saying, let’s go knock over a bank or something.” The devious smile didn’t leave her face as she threw my suitcase in her car with little consideration .

  “Ok, let's do something.” I consented, buckling in. “Distract me.”

  “Great! I actually already thought of something that we could do. I know, shocker. Sit back and enjoy!” She revved the engine and I laughed. I had forgotten how much fun Michelle could be when no one was looking. Never happy unless you got her alone, she would then light up a room with her spunk and energy. I looked over at her flat profile, so different from Lucy’s curvy body. Michelle’s big round cartoon eyes were magnified by her red makeup and black eyeliner. I remembered how she looked at Prom; her lips were thin but the curves were all well-defined and her eyes had more color with less makeup: a pretty golden brown. Her almost-natural face had looked so pretty that night. I couldn’t help picturing her less done-up, her attempt at keeping people away. It was the same get up we all wore at some time. I realized that, over the last year, we were all growing out of this stage. Michelle was the only one who hadn’t changed at all. In fact, it seemed the more the rest of us toned down the more she geared up.

  “So, let me ask you: How come you’re so pretty and no one knew?”

  “What the heck are you talking about?” She sounded offended. I just laughed.

  “At Prom, you looked so--” I cut the sentence off when I saw her scandalized face.

  “You mean when you noticed I had boobs?” She rolled her eyes. “I’m a female, you know!”

  “I noticed. At Prom.” I pinched her arm and she stuck her tongue out at me.

  “I missed you,” I said, feeling suddenly guilty, realizing that I was the reason we hadn’t spent any time together in the last year and a half.

  “Well, with Miss Perfect occupying you, there wasn’t much time to hang out.” Her voice was bitter, and I couldn’t blame her for it.

  “I know, I’m sorry. But you know, my phone works both ways.”

  “Don’t say stuff just because you feel guilty. Like it would have gone well if I had just been blowing up your phone with calls or texts when you were with your girlfriend. Gi’me a break.” Again, she was right. The guilt was getting too ridiculous, though.

  “Please, my old friend, can you ever forgive me? It’ll never happen again.” I kept the tone playful, but didn’t ham it up too much. I wanted her to know I meant it.

  “Okay, I’m done. You’re forgiven. Now reach in the back and get that grocery bag.” She pointed her thumb like she was hitchhiking at the back of the car. I turned around and saw a paper bag filled to the rim with toilet paper, eggs, and shaving cream.

  “Oh no, Mich, we are not going to egg someone.” I shook my head fiercely.

  “What? When did you lose
your nerve? Maybe on your last trip to the mall?” My getup got yet another look of disgust from Michelle.

  “Ah, no. It was when I turned eighteen and was able to get a record. Come on, girl, we are too old for this.” This was not what I’d had in mind when I’d agreed to ride along.

  “I disagree, we’re still in high school.”

  “Barely, we’re graduating in less than two weeks. I, for one, would LOVE to walk.”

  “We are high schoolers, David, for only a few weeks as you so smartly pointed out. Now, are you going to have fun with me, or am I going to have to force you?” An evil gleam shone from her eyes. Her combat boot was up on the dashboard, showing her knobby knees and tiny leg. I shook my head into submission, realizing it had been a long time since I had gotten into trouble with Michelle. Maybe it would be good for me. At least I could afford to make bail if worse came to worst.

  “Fine, who are we torturing tonight?” I felt a surge of excitement as I said the words. When was the last time I’d acted like a kid? It had probably been four or five years ago, the last time Michelle and I were hanging out on a regular basis.

  “Oh, you’ll see.” Her grin told me she was being bad and loving it. Michelle was an amazing girl, totally hard on the outside and a little crazy but I always enjoyed being around her. She moved her arms quickly and was never gentle with anything. She was just tough in a way that didn’t have anything to do with size. For as much as she took care of her appearance, she was comfortable and confident in her own skin. I thought about the way Lucy held her arms, always loosely, or twirling a lock of light brown strands.

  Michelle drove into a neighborhood I had never been into. It was ridiculous. Street after street of giant Victorian houses rolled by.

  “Who do we know that lives here?” I asked, but she didn’t answer. “Hello?” I looked over and saw her smile wide with anticipation.

  “Hush, it’s a surprise; I planned this just for you.” She tried to speak sweetly, but just sounded like she was a mouse trying to escape from a trap. We turned onto a street and parked in front of a big white house with blue trimming. Beautiful trees with pink flowers stood in large, fluffy clumps in the front yard.

  “I don’t know who this is?” I shut the door behind me, purposefully leaving the grocery bag in the car.

  “Please, this isn’t the house, we are walking two blocks down. You know better than that!” She gave me an incredulous look, took the big brown bag out and handed it to me. “Hold this, geeze. Aren’t you like a gentlemen now or something?” Her eyes rolled in disgust as she put the grocery bag in my hands and led me up the street, walking through snappy fall air. Her arm snaked into the crook of my elbow and we walked side by side.

  “So, you met your parents this weekend?” She tried to hide her interest.

  “I did; it was strange. I really like my dad, Anthony. It’s crazy how young he is.”

  “What’s he like?” She held her body closer to mine and I felt a shock of sparks run through me. I looked down at her, half expecting to see blue eyes looking up at me. Golden brown eyes, surrounded by dark makeup, looked up at me. They weren’t the eyes I’d been expecting, but they gave me the same kind of comfort the blue ones had. They looked at me the same way, like what I had to say mattered.

  “Umm.” I stammered, trying to get my thoughts back on track with the conversation topic. “He’s really nice, like, thoughtful. He does whatever he can for everyone around him.”

  “Sounds like you.” She said this stupid thing like it was obvious.

  “Hardly, he is much nicer than I ever have been.”

  “Oh hush, you’re one of the nicest people I know. You try to act all tough and like you don’t like people but you always were a pansy.” She sneered at me in the dark but squeezed my arm to reassure me that she was teasing.

  “Wow, thanks. I think.” Michelle had never held on to me like this before and we had been friends for a long time. She’d also never said anything that nice directly to me. Michelle didn’t feel soft and warm like Lucy had with her big chest and curvy hips. The girl next to me was much bonier and her leather jacket made it feel like she had a hard layer of impenetrable dragon skin. What was a shock, though, was realizing that hardness was kind of a relief. I didn’t have to worry about offending Michelle, or doing the wrong thing. We had been friends for so long, we just kind of knew how to act around each other. It wasn’t an effort.

  “Ok, my surprise is just up here.” She pointed to a street sign that said Peseta and steered my body down a long street that seemed gaudier than the last. After walking halfway down the street we stopped in front of a mustard-yellow Victorian with a brown roof and a bright red double-wide door. This yard, like every other one, was immense and perfectly landscaped. I still had no clue who lived here, though.

  “I give up, whose house is this?”

  “I’ll give you a hint. It’s a girl. She is tall and I guess she is pretty, whatever, and she is mean.” Michelle was hopping up and down with excitement.

  “That describes a number of girls.” I was silently wishing it wasn’t who I thought.

  “It’s Rachel’s house, dummy. Grab an egg.” I put the bag down, harder than I needed to, and rounded on Michelle.

  “What are you doing, bringing me here?” My tone didn’t faze her at all.

  “You’re telling me you don’t want to egg that girl’s car?”

  “No.”

  “Liar.” Crap. I kind of was lying. I didn’t really want to get into trouble, but I really did want to release some of the never-ending frustration I felt when I thought about Rachel.

  “I am not, what’s the point of me doing that?” As soon as I said it, I regretted it. Johnny was the one who usually gave up when I asked him for logic. Michelle, the tiny mean genius, waited for it. I was going to lose.

  “Well, David, let’s think hard about that one.” She put her fist up in the air then popped one finger up, like she was going to make a list. I groaned in protest, not wanting to be reminded.

  “She is mean and I hate her.” A second finger popped up.

  “She tricked you into kissing her.” She held up her third finger.

  “She then made Lucy believe that you kissed Rachel against her will, forcing yourself on her, so to speak.” Finger number four shot up.

  “I really hate her.” She then held up her fifth finger.

  “She is still mean to Lucy and continues to give her a hard time.” My head snapped up and I glared at Michelle as she waved her open hand at me, all five fingers wiggling.

  “What do you mean?” I growled.

  “Jennika told me,” she said, arms crossed.

  “Why is she still being mean to her?” I felt my hands go into fists, my temper rising. Michelle’s eyes then switched from gleeful to blank. She had switched something off. The iron curtain had descended.

  “No reason.” She stared at me blankly. “Just the normal.”

  “There’s something you’re not telling me,” I accused.

  “Rachel being mean is normal. That’s all, David.” She wasn’t going to give and it made me angry. I closed my eyes and breathed deeply, calming down before I spoke again.

  “Is Lucy okay, Michelle?” I took deep breaths as I waited for her answer.

  “Yeah, she’s okay, David.” She looked me straight in the eye and plopped an egg in my hand. “Now throw the dang egg.”

  I paused.

  “Throw it, pretty boy.”

  “I really don’t wa--”

  “Throw the egg.”

  “But--”

  “Throw the egg.”

  “I jus—“

  ‘Throw the flipping egg.”

  “Mitch--”

  “Throw the egg, David.”

  “NO!”

  “THROW IT!”

  “Ahh!” I yelled into Michelle’s face as I dropped the egg onto the hood of the custom pink BMW. Then I looked. The egg still looked like a whole egg on top, but some clear egg w
hite oozed out under where the egg had met the hood. Michelle looked up at me and rolled her eyes then lifted her leg up and smashed the boot gently with her heel. The sole left a black scuff mark on the paint and, despite myself, I laughed. It looked like a poop stain.

  “That’s the spirit!” She handed me another egg. This one I threw up in the air and watched it fall on the roof, where it exploded. I grabbed another, tossing it at the window.

  “Hola!” Michelle yelled, grabbed her own egg, and threw it against the car, egg and shell spitting back at us. It took a few minutes, but we used every single egg in the three cartons she’d bought trying to cover every part of the ridiculously expensive car.

  “Looks good.” Michelle said as she lifted out two jumbo cans of men’s shaving cream.

  “Michelle! That stuff peels paint off. I don’t think--” She put her hand up to hush me.

  “Are we going to do this argument all over again, or are you just going to realize you want to do this?”

  I laughed and shook my head. I was having fun being out here, doing something stupid, reckless, and irresponsible. I took the can from her and shook it. She mimicked me, then we both took off the caps in unison. Michelle started writing profanities on the trunk of the pink car while I concentrated on covering all the windows. Michelle kept looking over at me out of the corner of her eyes. The only reason I noticed was because I was doing the same thing. What was going on with me?

  I had never been attracted to Michelle before. For some reason I was aware of every move she made tonight. Maybe it was seeing her at prom and realizing that there was a pretty girl under there, one who could do more than just tough-girl. It could have been the fact that she went out of her way to do something that she knew would make me laugh tonight. I knew that she hadn’t done this kind of thing in a long time, either. Although she did enjoy shenanigans, I knew tonight had been carefully planned to make me let go, loosen up, and just enjoy myself.