“Son of a bitch,” I hissed.
“Just ignore it,” He said licking along the top of the lace. “It’s probably Gina.”
“I can’t. What if it’s Taylor?”
He groaned as I made him roll to his side so I could grab my phone. Reluctantly, he sat up on the bed and watched me as I answered. His fingers trailed over my exposed skin and I shivered at the contact. Taylor’s name flashed across the screen.
“What’s up?” I snapped into the phone.
“Where are you?”
“I’m in my hotel room. Where are you?”
“No, I mean, why aren’t you down at the spa? The hotel moved up our reservation. Didn’t you get my text last night?”
“Fuck. I’ll be there in two minutes.”
I stared at Adam as he stood up and walked towards the bathroom. We were never going to get to have sex. Here he was in all his sweaty, sexy goodness and I had to go meet my friends for a pedicure instead of getting laid.
“Hurry up or they aren’t going to be able to keep all of us together.”
“Two minutes, Taylor,” I said as I climbed off the bed.
“See you in a second.”
As much as I wanted to, I didn’t throw my cell phone against the wall and shatter it into a million pieces. Instead, I grabbed the pillow and chucked it across the room. What was it with all my friends cockblocking me? Again.
“Adam,” I called out. “I’m going to meet the girls.”
He didn’t answer, and I didn’t want to leave without telling him I was leaving. I pushed open the door. My mouth dropped open as Adam stood in front of me stark naked. I didn’t even pretend not to look, and he sure as hell didn’t seem to care. His cock stood out in all its ten inch glory.
Fuck. Me.
“I’m…um…I’m leaving?”
“Are you sure?” he asked grinning. “Is that a question? Or are you telling me?”
I covered my eyes and took two steps back. “Damn it, I’m leaving. I’m going to kill Taylor.”
The last thing I saw before I closed the door behind me was his toned ass. This better be the best damn massage I’ve ever had in my life.
Taylor was waiting for me just outside the doors when I made my way to the spa entrance.
“You’re late.”
“I didn’t hear my phone go off last night.”
“Because of all that wild sex,” she said, wiggling her eyebrows at me.
“I wish,” I said bitterly.
She raised an eyebrow. “Seriously, you were all over him at dinner? What happened?”
“I was in the bathroom puking up the hundred dollars worth of wine he bought me.” I put my face in my hands. “It was embarrassing as hell. And everyone keeps interrupting, so we can’t have sex. Then right before I come down here, I walk in on him in the bathroom. Holy hell Taylor. He’s huge. I probably still have drool hanging from my mouth.”
She laughed and pretended to check. “Because you were,” she trailed off.
“Uhg, no Taylor, I was not sucking his cock before coming down here. You interrupted.”
She started laughing. “So you guys haven’t done it yet?”
“No. Seriously, everyone keeps stopping us. A week and a half ago we were messing around on my couch, he gets called into work. Two days after that, I have to go to Los Angeles for a business meeting. Yesterday, Vi and Jax show up asking us to go to lunch. Last night I threw up like the exorcist and this morning when I thought it actually might happen, the damn spa changes our appointment,” I said in a rush.
“Damn. You’re incredibly sexually frustrated.”
“Thanks captain obvious, yes. I just want to get laid. It’s been like four months.”
She looked at me suspiciously. “Four months? Does that mean—”
“Come on, we’re running late. Is Violet’s waiting for us?”
“Oh no, you’re going to answer that question.” I rushed inside, hugging Violet quickly and shooting her a pleading look. “Emmy, answer me.”
“They’re waiting on us to go back,” Vi said.
Taylor grabbed my arm as we walked down the long hallway to the private pedicure room. “Did you, or did you not have sex with Mason while you were in California?”
“What!?” Violet screeched from behind us. So much for privacy in this place. She came up on the other side of me. “Oh, my gosh, did you—”
“Yes, okay. Yes, I had sex with my ex-husband.” Both of their mouths opened in shock. If it wasn’t so embarrassing, it would actually be pretty funny. “Let’s get settled and then I will tell you two nosy bitches everything.”
I was able to put them off for a while because neither of them would make me talk in front of the technicians, but they wanted my story. Desperately. If I played my cards right, I could get away without telling them at all though. Taylor already knew there was something going on. She just didn’t know details, and if I had my way, she wouldn’t.
Unfortunately my luck didn’t hold. Because the spa was so busy, they left us in the chairs to let our feet soak while they finished up with some other clients. Lexi had come in a few minutes after me, apparently she’d missed the text too. Within minutes all of them were staring me down, expecting me to tell them everything. At least I had some shock value, because now they were staring at me, slack jawed, as well, as I told them everything.
“I knew you were keeping something from me on the plane,” she said, narrowing her eyes.
“Don’t even start with me. You’ve got secrets of your own.”
She sat back in her chair quickly. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
I arched a brow. “Fine, play dumb, but I know better.”
Taylor reached out and pinched my arm. “You couldn’t have told me any of this while Stephen was recovering? I could have used something to help take my mind off of things.”
“Ouch! I haven’t told anyone, and I sure as hell don’t plan on it happening again.”
“So what happened between you and Adam after you got back to the city? Is that why you guys were fighting?” Lexi asked.
“Okay, I told one person. Adam deserved better. Even though we hadn’t defined our relationship, I wanted to be honest with him.”
“And obviously he didn’t like it,” Violet said. “Now answer this, why is he here with you if you guys broke up?”
I felt like I was playing a game of twenty questions, except I never got a turn.
I shrugged. “He forgave me.”
“And now you guys keep getting interrupted before you can have sex,” Taylor said laughing.
Lexi and Violet gaped at me. “Really?” they asked.
“Oh yeah. It’s like the universe is conspiring against us.” I relayed the story about the couch, then all of yesterday’s embarrassing events. “I just want to have sex with my boyfriend and it’s never going to happen.”
Lexi grinned. “I can honestly say, I don’t think I’ve ever had that many problems getting laid.”
I glared at her. “Don’t make fun of me. I’m horny and irritable.”
“Well there’s nothing stopping you later. Although I will say, keep Adam and Mason apart or there might be a cat fight. The way Mase was staring at him last night, I thought Adam’s head might explode,” Taylor said.
I grimaced. “I knew it might be a possibility that it might happen, but I didn’t want to come without Adam, especially after what happened in California.”
“You’re positive you’re over Mason?” Violet asked softly.
I nodded slowly. It shouldn’t be that painful to say it. “Yeah, I am.”
“Then you should tell him.”
Violet understood. Her divorce had been messy and awful, just like my separation with Mason. Aaron had sank his claws into her and wouldn’t let go, seeing that her future was a lot brighter than his.
The girls mercifully moved on to another topic. I was stuck with thoughts of California and the last glimpse of Mason before
he’d walked out the door, flying around in my head. It wasn’t fair the way I’d placed all the blame on him. We shouldn’t have slept together. We both knew it because every time we were together, we started falling back on old habits. It was time to change that, and Adam was going to be the way to do it.
***
We made it through the ceremony without incident. Taylor looked stunning and looked incredibly happy. Stephen had gone all out when he booked the wedding venue to surprise Taylor. I think we were all a little impressed. The reception was gorgeous and watching everyone in our small group, including Rhys, the guy that Taylor almost had a thing with six months ago, was incredible. We all considered ourselves family and it seemed to be growing every time we turned around.
The staff had put out tables and true to Taylor form, there would be music. She had begged Luke to sing and of course because it was her wedding, he’d relented. More than likely, she would be up on that stage by the end of the night too.
"You look amazing tonight, Em," Adam said in my ear. I had worn a beautiful two piece dress. The bottom was a high waisted rose gold mermaid skirt and the top was a black satin sleeveless crop top. I’d paired it with jeweled Jimmy Choo's. Taylor hadn't wanted me to dress any certain way for the ceremony. Her style was boho chic most days, but surprisingly her gown was more traditional than I expected. All of my friends cleaned up nicely; although they should, being that they were some of Hollywood's best and brightest. My eyes kept drifting to Adam. He looked quite amazing himself in his black tux.
He took my hand and led me to the middle of the designated dance floor. Luke was singing 'The way you look tonight’, one of Taylor's favorites. The reception was turning out amazing and I hoped that the romance from the wedding carried over into our evening in the room. Adam's hand rubbed lightly against the skin exposed from my crop top, making it tingle with each swipe. I rested my face on Adam's shoulder as he pulled me in closer. We were lost in our own little bubble, ignoring everyone around us.
"May I cut in?"
I jumped at the sound of Mason's voice. Adam looked at me questioningly before stepping back. I nodded and he stepped back with a sharp look directed at Mason.
"I'll be at our table if you need anything, Em." He kissed my temple and reluctantly turned towards where we were sitting.
"Thank you, Adam."
I didn't want to make a scene. All of our friends were watching closely and the last thing I wanted to do was ruin Taylor's perfect wedding with my drama. Dread filled me as the silence grew between us. There was a tension that hadn't been there before. Mason was dressed in a tux just as sharp as Adam's and I tried hard not to stare at his handsome profile. Just because we were over, didn’t mean that I was completely blind to how amazing he looked.
"Mason, why are you doing this?"
"Emerald, I’m sorry I left like I did. I needed time to think about us. I never wanted the divorce in the first place, but there were things holding me to Georgia. That's why I couldn't follow you to New York. I wasn't sure if it would work. If we could work, the long distance thing," he clarified. "But now, I think we can do it. You admitted that you wanted me too. I want you to come home and stay there with me—”
"You don't get to come in here and act like everything is okay between us. It’s not. Our best friend almost died and you couldn’t even be bothered to tell me goodbye after how close we came to losing him. I get you were pissed at me, but did it not make you think about how precious life is, Mason? I did," I hissed. "I might have been mad at you, but I never hated you.”
“I don’t hate you,” he said quickly. “I still love you.”
I scoffed. “Our relationship was toxic. We fought and made up so many times we couldn’t actually tell if we were together or broken up. How is that love?” He didn’t answer. “I know the truth about why you asked for the divorce. I had to hear the truth from Stephen because you wouldn’t tell me. Even after I found out the truth about the divorce, you couldn’t open your mouth and tell me.”
"Okay, that was a mistake on my part. You deserved the truth from me, and I’m sorry for that, but what does that have to do with us being together now? We’ve always had a complicated relationship—we’re lawyers, we argue, it’s what we do—but I don’t think that makes us toxic.”
"As always, it’s too little, too late, Mase. If you hadn’t lied and tried to make decisions about our life without me, none of this would have happened in the first place. You should have given me the choice before throwing me out, but you’re a bastard. It wasn’t fair to me that you chose a future for us without even looking at our past. We were supposed to be forever and you fucked it up, Mason.”
He looked at me with tears in his eyes. “I was trying to do what I promised, Emmy. Do you really think I should have left Aubrey there by herself when her husband died?”
“No, I don’t, but you should have given me the option of being there too. She was my sister too.” We’d stopped dancing. I took my hand out of his and put it on my hip, this wasn’t what I wanted for Taylor and Stephen’s wedding. “I told you in California and I’m telling you again. It’s over Mason.”
Without looking back, I turned away from Mason and left the reception. I couldn’t look back. If I did I would lose any semblance of control I had.
My office was quiet. The entire floor of the building was quiet. People acted like I didn’t notice them tiptoeing around me, but I did. Sure, my temper had been on an incredibly short fuse for the past two weeks, but they were overreacting. It wasn’t like I was telling people to fuck off every second or anything. I was just incredibly demanding of my time. If they wanted to waste precious seconds on stupid shit, I was going to let them know it wasn’t acceptable.
I stared out the window into the dark night sky. Every day I worked a little longer, falling back into the old habit of essentially living out of my office, great for production, horrible for my moral. I only went home to sleep a few hours, shower, and change clothes. Not that I really wanted to sleep. Every night, vivid dreams about Mason and our baby woke me up with tears streaming down my face.
Something had to change, I understood it did. But knowing and making it happen were two different things. At this point, I couldn’t fathom a way to start healing. Adam had been more understanding than he should have been. I hadn’t told him about the nightmares, and he wasn’t pushing when it came to my weak excuses on why my hours were longer with each passing day since we’d been back from Vegas. I suspected that he knew, but to my relief, he didn’t seem to want to talk about it. He was supportive and loving, continually asking if he could do anything to help. Even worse was the fact that we still hadn’t slept together. We hadn’t even had any more close calls.
The night of Taylor’s wedding, Adam had come back to the room to find me asleep in the dress I’d worn to the wedding. I hadn’t even taken off my shoes before crashing. He helped me get into pajamas and curled up behind me, stroking my head and telling me that it was going to be okay.
We both knew it was over; I just needed to man up and say the words. It wasn’t up to Adam; it was up to me because I was the one walking all over him. He deserved better than me avoiding him for weeks at a time because something had gone wrong with Mason. Again. Yes, I’d embarrassed the hell out of myself, but Adam wasn’t the one I was mad at. It didn’t matter that we’d never talked about labels or exclusivity, I still felt like I owed it to him.
“What are you still doing here, Em?”
I startled in my chair when Luke’s deep, base voice came from behind me. My chair practically tipped me out as I whipped around to see him.
“You scared the hell out of me. Why are you here so late?”
“I should be asking the same about you.”
He pinned me with a look and I motioned for him to sit down. Reaching into my bottom drawer, I pulled out a bottle of Jameson and two lowball glasses. I poured two fingers of whiskey in each glass, pushing the first one towards Luke.
“W
hat else do you have hidden in that magic drawer of yours?”
I gave a half-hearted smile. “Just the basics, handcuffs, condoms and lube.”
His big frame leaned back into the leather club chair. “Answer my first question Emmy. Why are you still here?”
I took a drink to buy a few more seconds. Luke knew me and a lie wouldn’t work on him. He would see right through it, and me. “Have you ever felt so lost that nothing in your life felt right anymore?”
He arched an eyebrow. “Two words, Emmy. Gay rockstar.”
I chuckled softly, the sound foreign to my own ears. “I guess you’re right.”
“Be honest. What’s going on with you, kid?”
I sighed. “I have this amazing guy right here that wants to start a life with me, but I’m so hung up on someone that doesn’t want me, I can’t move forward with my life. All I want to do is finally move past the heartache and pain with Mason, but every time I take one step forward it’s like I take two giant steps back.”
“Honey, you know all about my ex. You are probably the only one I told everything that happened to. He’s always going to be part of me because of what we shared, but I knew it was time to move on when I didn’t think about him.” I must have given him a confused look because he went on. “Things with Max were never easy. As I started touring and going around the country, I realized that I didn’t need to talk to him each day, or even each week. Decisions were easier without him and I was happier by myself. He didn’t make my life better and I didn’t think about whether my decisions affected him. That’s when I knew.”
“Mase doesn’t influence my decisions,” I said quickly.
“Doesn’t he? Why did you ask Adam to go with you to Vegas?”
Flawless: A Relentless Series Novel (The Relentless Series Book 4) Page 12