My New Crush Gave to Me

by Shani Petroff

  “Thank you, thank you, thank you,” I said and hugged my arms around my chest. This was so going to work.

  Seven

  I adjusted the chairs in the computer lab so they were in a perfectly spaced circle, put my coat on the back of the one with a direct line of sight to the door, and pushed a small desk in front of my seat. I had gotten to the meeting extra early to ensure I’d be the first one there. It was important that I be in control of all aspects of the Secret Santa drawing in order for it to go smoothly.

  I was sure I’d thought of everything down to the last detail—including the mason jar I brought from home. I carefully took it out of my bag and placed it on the desk along with the tiny slips of paper I cut up last night.

  Katie and Zakiyah came into the room a few minutes later.

  “My Secret Santa better get me something good,” Zakiyah said as she reached for a little slip of paper.

  I pushed them away from her. “I’ll fill them all out,” I said.

  “Wouldn’t it be easier if we all did our own?” she asked.

  Of course it would, but then I wouldn’t have been able to keep Teo’s name from going in the jar. And right now, a slip of paper with his name on it was safely tucked away in my pocket.

  “I want to make sure all of the names are legible,” I explained. “That way there won’t be any confusion.”

  Zakiyah sneered at me. “I think I can fill out my own name.”

  She reached for the slip again, and I grabbed them all away. “I want them to be consistent,” I growled.

  Zakiyah curled her lip at me. “What is wrong with you?”

  “Nothing.”

  “Just let it go,” Katie whispered to her. “You know how she is.”

  “Yeah, insane,” she said as they went to take seats. “Always has to get her way. How does she even know everyone wants to take part?”

  “I’ll ask them,” I answered.

  “Wasn’t talking to you,” Zakiyah said.

  Whatever, let her be mad. It wasn’t like Zakiyah and I hadn’t had our issues before. Besides, this wasn’t about her. It was about Teo and me.

  I held my breath every time someone entered the room. And right on time, Teo walked in. I loved his punctuality. I didn’t even bother to hide my grin. He smiled back, and I knew I was doing the right thing with this whole Secret Santa plan.

  Morgan made me wait a few minutes for the stragglers before we got started, even though J.D. was the only one who walked in late.

  As talk about themes, deadlines, and word counts dwindled down, I checked that everyone wanted to be a part of the Secret Santa.

  “When is the party again?” Teo asked.

  “The Friday before vacation,” I told him, giving him my most flirty smile.

  “Really?” Zakiyah said, interrupting my moment. “We finally get out of school, and you want us to stay in the building even longer? Why don’t we do the week before?”

  “This was discussed already,” I reminded her. “At a meeting you were at, even though you weren’t supposed to be.”

  “Sue me for not hanging on your every word,” she said. “But my point still stands.”

  She was not messing this up for me. “We need enough time for the Secret Santa,” I informed her, nipping the suggestion in the bud. Things couldn’t change. I already had everything mapped out, like the days I’d give Teo his gifts, my “accidental” run-ins, and so on. I wasn’t about to go back to the drawing board.

  Zakiyah was shooting daggers at me, so Morgan jumped in. “It’s a celebration of the holiday and the paper coming out. Some of us will be on crazy deadlines before then, so that’s really the only day that we can do it. Sure, we’ll still be in school. But it’s not for work. It’s for fun. And it will only be an hour or so. Some food, drinks, presents, friends. Come on, we deserve this! What do you say?”

  They all nodded. Morgan was definitely better with people than I was. I put everyone’s name in the jar as she made a list of what everyone was going to bring to the party.

  When I finished, Zakiyah came up and grabbed the jar.

  “Uh … what are you doing?” I asked.

  “Getting this meeting over with.” She handed the jar to Katie, who was to my left, and told her to take one and pass it around.

  I jumped up. “I’ll make sure everyone takes one.”

  “We’ve got it,” Zakiyah said. “You’ll get your turn. It will make its way back to you.” She rolled her eyes as she returned to her seat—right next to Teo. Of course, she put herself next to the hottest guy in the room. Not that that mattered now. I had bigger problems.

  I didn’t know what to do. I was supposed to draw first, so I could pretend to pull out my premade slip, but the jar was already making the rounds. I had to stop this. Only how? I couldn’t make a scene, not with Teo there. But if I didn’t, by the time the jar got to me, they’d realize we were one name short.

  If I didn’t know better, I would have thought this was Zakiyah’s revenge for gutting most of her gossip column. I was fine with the who’s dating who, and who got into their dream colleges—but the breakups and rejections just seemed mean. Only next edition, she’d have a real scoop: COEDITOR OF THE PAPER RIGS SECRET SANTA DRAWING. And I wouldn’t even be able to edit it out. That would just be asking for her to spread it over every social media channel imaginable. I was done for.

  The jar made it halfway around the room. Zakiyah had just reached in, and I still didn’t have a plan. “Seriously,” she said, studying her slip. “Does someone want to trade?”

  She probably got my name. Although three of her exes worked on the paper, so it really could have been any of us. But honestly, it didn’t matter. That was the least of my concerns.

  There had to be a way to fix this. I was smart. I could come up with something. I wasn’t trying to cover up some diabolical plot, just a silly holiday game. This was a no-brainer. Think, Charlie! Okay, I could just get up, walk over to the jar, pretend to trip, and knock it over. Who am I kidding? That won’t work. Everyone would know I did it on purpose. It was way too obvious. Maybe I could pretend one of the slips of paper fell under my desk and that I just found it. Only then I’d have to throw Teo’s name in the jar and ruin my chances of getting it. I could wait until the jar came around to me and then magically find the slip of paper on the floor, but what if someone called for a do-over? Zakiyah was bound to ask for one. She had made it clear she wasn’t happy with her pick.

  I didn’t have any choice. I was going to have to risk it. Either that or admit that I tampered with the drawing—which wasn’t an option.

  Only I waited too long.

  The jar made it to Ruthie Gruber, who was sitting to my right. “Hey,” she said, reaching her hand into the jar. “There’s not enough. This is the last one. Someone’s name was left out.”

  “I told you we should have all put our own names in,” Zakiyah called out.

  Why hadn’t I moved faster? How was I going to get Teo’s slip on the floor without everyone noticing?! I reached my hand into my pockets, but they were sweaty and shaking. “Um, I … um, I, uh, filled out everyone’s names. Maybe one of them, um, fell.” I got down on my knees and pretended to look around. So much for appearing calm and cool and in my element. I just wanted to disappear. How bad would crawling to the other side of the room and curling up into a ball in the corner until everyone left look? This was what I got for trying to break the rules once in my life. Morgan was right; I was an awful liar. Why had I even tried?

  “Let’s just fill out new slips and start over,” Zakiyah said. “I want to get out of here.”

  I got up and nodded. It was over. I had lost.

  Morgan was staring at me with an I-told-you-so look mixed with pity. I closed my eyes and willed away the tears that were threatening to show themselves. Why had I been so stupid?

  Zakiyah pulled out some paper and started tearing it into little slips.

  “Wait!” Morgan called out over everyone’s
chatter. “Don’t kill me. We don’t have to do it over. We’re good. It’s totally my fault. I accidentally took two names. The papers were stuck together. I’m sorry. I’ll give the extra to Charlie. I’ll see most of you next week. Everyone else, I’ll see you at the party.”

  Wait, what?!!

  Was I hearing correctly? Had my best friend really come through again?

  I sat there frozen as everyone but Morgan filed out of the room. I still couldn’t believe this worked.

  “Merry Christmas,” she said and smiled. “You got what you wanted. Do I give the best gifts or what?”

  “You do,” I said, my whole body finally relaxing. I … well, Morgan … actually pulled off my plan.

  “I know,” she said and did a little victory dance. “I told you I had your back.”

  “Thank you,” I said. But it wasn’t just for the Secret Santa help. It was for everything. Morgan was always there for me, no matter what. My boy situation was still a work in progress, but I definitely got an A when it came to picking a best friend. And with her help, I knew I could make the Teo operation a success.

  I was going to have a date to the Christmas Ball. I could feel it.

  Eight

  “Score,” I called out as I pulled into one of the best parking spots at Sandbrook Mall. “Your superpower has come through again,” I told Morgan and drummed on the steering wheel in excitement. The shopping trip for Teo was already off to a great start.

  Morgan laughed. “Glad to be of service.”

  The girl had the absolute best luck in the world when it came to finding spots. It was like the parking gods watched over her, even during the holiday rush, and got her a spot in seconds. There were dozens of cars still circling, but not us!

  “And before we go in,” she said, pulling a small container from her bag, “some sustenance.”

  My mouth was already beginning to salivate. “Oh my gosh! Have I told you how much I love you?”

  “Yeah, I’m the best,” she said jokingly. Only it was no joke. Morgan took off the lid and the smell of cinnamon-sugary yumminess filled the car. It was her famous snickerdoodles. After I stuffed what had to be the eighth one in my mouth, we were ready to hit the mall. “Those are incredible,” I told her. “The PTA is going to be demanding more after they get a taste of these.” They really were addictive. All of Morgan’s creations were. I had gained fifteen pounds since she and I started our bakery business, and at this rate I’d put on a few more by Christmas. There was a good chance I’d have to start wearing stretchy pants to school, but I didn’t care. It was worth it. “The only problem is, I may be eating all of our profits.”

  “Hey,” she said, slightly knocking her shoulder against mine, “if it gets you back in the holiday spirit, it’s all good.”

  “Thanks.” The truth was, I was finally starting to feel like my old self. I may not have been getting my usual Christmas, but Operation Secret Santa gave me something to look forward to. It would let me spread Christmas cheer and snag the perfect guy to kiss under the mistletoe at Noelle’s party.

  I felt a rush when we walked inside. Some things never changed; you could always count on the mall to remind you it was holiday time. The throngs of people headed in every direction, the holiday decorations as far as the eye could see, the scent—I was fairly certain they pumped a pine fragrance into the air—and, of course, the sounds: the chatter of kids and parents finishing their shopping lists and the Christmas music that filled the space. Holiday songs always made me smile, but the fact that “All I Want for Christmas Is You” was playing made it even better. It felt like another sign that I was headed in the right direction.

  “Where to first?” Morgan asked.

  I pulled out my list. Last night, I went over a map of the mall and planned out the most efficient course of action. “We start out on the lower level with the sporting goods store, and then make a beeline down winter village.” Every Christmas the mall set out a row of little kiosks that sold all sorts of gifts—everything from snow globes, candles, and ornaments to jewelry, wallets, specialty foods, and more. “Then we head to the upper level and stop at the bookstore, Funny or What gifts, and finish at Jordan’s.” I saved the best for last. Jordan’s was one of the most popular stores in the mall. Partially because it had these awesome massage chairs that you could sit in and the employees rarely kicked you out, but also because it had really cool stuff. All the latest electronics, app-controlled devices, gadgets like glasses and pens that had recorders in them, games, consoles, and more. I figured after all that shopping, we could reward ourselves with a well-deserved massage.

  The sporting goods store wound up being a bust. Nothing called out Teo.

  “Want to try the sports boutique?” Morgan asked.

  I shook my head. I specifically left that off my list. “I don’t know which players are his favorite.” Not for lack of trying. I had studied his GroupIt page in depth to prepare for today. I looked over every single picture, every post, every interest. I was going to know the perfect gifts when I saw them. “It’s okay. We have a lot of places to look at.” I wasn’t deterred; I hadn’t really expected to find anything at the first store.

  But my confidence was starting to wane when I came up empty at winter village, the bookstore, and Funny or What. Turned out that looking at someone’s selfies and photos of their ski trip, birthday, and other random events didn’t make you an expert on them. I couldn’t even pick out one book I thought suited Teo, let alone five of them.

  I let out a huge sigh. “Well, this isn’t going like I planned. Did you see anything?” I asked Morgan.

  “No, this is hard.”

  “Impossible,” I corrected her.

  “Hey, we are not giving up,” Morgan said, her voice sounding optimistic. “There’s still Jordan’s.”

  She was right. I wasn’t done yet. I could do this. I wasn’t a quitter. “Yeah, totally, it has everything.” I’d find something there.

  And I did. Lots of amazing somethings. For me. As for Teo? I was at a loss. Not only did nothing call out his name, but everything was so expensive. I wanted to get him something nice, but I didn’t have a gazillion dollars to spend.

  A knot was forming in my neck. A massage in one of the store’s chairs would have helped, but two kids were camped out in them and showed no sign of moving.

  Nothing was going right. Just when I thought maybe the holidays were looking up, my plans fell apart. I couldn’t show Teo how well I knew him, because I didn’t. So much for five perfect gifts. I couldn’t even come up with one semi-okay one. I walked out of the store and leaned against the wall.

  “This sucks,” I muttered. Not even “Winter Wonderland,” one of my favorite Christmas songs of all time, blasting through the speakers was going to improve my mood. “Any ideas?” I asked Morgan, hoping she had a burst of inspiration.

  “Still no clue. I had a hard enough time thinking of something for Ira, and he gave me hints. I barely know Teo. I wouldn’t even know where to start.”

  That was the problem.

  Neither did I.

  But I knew someone who would. Now, the question was, could I bring myself to ask him?

  Nine

  Don’t do it, Charlie. Don’t do it. Leave now. It’s not too late. I turned around and headed away from J.D. Ortiz’s house, but I only made it about three feet before I made a one-eighty and was back at his doorstep. Do not push that doorbell. Don’t do it. You will regret it. You can come up with your own ideas. You don’t need J.D.’s help. You are better than this. Only I wasn’t. If I wanted to get Teo personalized gifts, I needed someone who knew him personally. But did it have to be J.D.?

  I turned to leave again. Then back around. I may have repeated that move three or four times. I didn’t know what to do. But I couldn’t stand there forever. I had to make up my mind. I can do this. I can do this. No, I can’t.

  This was a stupid idea. I was going home. I should have just dropped Morgan off and kept driving in the
first place. I’d just buy Teo a Starbucks card and some chocolate snowmen and be done with it. Operation Secret Santa was officially over.

  I’d made it down the steps when I heard the door open.

  “So,” J.D. said, with one eyebrow raised, “did you just come to spin around at my doorway or did you want something?”

  Crap. Why did he have to see me? “Don’t worry about it. Forget I was here.”

  “Yeah…” He hemmed. “I don’t know that I’ll be able to unsee that.” Then he mimicked my awkward turns back and forth. “If it’s dance lessons you’re after, I agree, you need them. But I’m probably not the guy.”

  “Good to know,” I said and continued down his walkway.

  “Wait,” he called after me. “Are you really not going to tell me why you’re here?”

  I have already made a fool of myself; should I just ask for his help? It’s not like it can get any worse. Only I knew that wasn’t true. Still … I was already there … “Fine,” I said. “I have an offering. These”—I held up the half-eaten container of Morgan’s snickerdoodles—“in exchange for your help.”

  “Help with what?”

  “You have to swear this stays between us,” I said, and walked back over to him.

  “How can I swear when I don’t know what I’m swearing to?”

  “You are just swearing to keep a secret.”

  “But if I don’t know the secret…”

  I turned around again. “I knew this was a bad idea. Forget it.”

  “Okay, okay,” he said. “I swear.”

  I held out my pinkie finger.

  “You’ve got to be kidding.”

  “Just do it,” I instructed.

  “Solely for the sake of curiosity,” he said as he did the pinkie promise with me. “Now do you want to come in and tell me your big confession, or would you rather stay out here? It’s pretty cold out.”

  “Fine.” I followed him inside, and he offered me a seat in the living room. I don’t know what I was expecting his house to look like, but not this. It had a warm, homey feeling. Almost rustic. I guess I expected something a little more scattered, kind of like J.D.