Springer, Jan - Be My Dream Tonight [The Desperadoes 3] (Siren Publishing Ménage Amour)

by Jan Springer

  “Domesticated?” Her frown deepened, and she ripped off her leather gloves and blew onto her fingers.

  He wanted to take her hands into his, to warm those fingers. To intertwine them between his own. To hold her hands while he made love to her and showed her exactly how badly he’d missed her.

  Oh shit. That wasn’t happening. She’d been gone for almost two years now. She’d escaped whomever had kidnapped her, and from the little information they’d gotten, she’d been helped by the very pregnant, beautiful, black-haired mystery woman who’d refused to tell them who she was or who had kidnapped Eve. Eve had asked them to leave her alone that one time they’d encountered her in HellCity. Then she had gone off with the woman to parts unknown. Now suddenly she was back and his heart was aching like a son of a bitch once again.

  “They were stupid enough to fall for women. We went our separate ways.” The cold, harsh way he blurted out those words had Mad, Riley, and Eve snapping their heads up to look at him. Surprise etched their faces.

  Okay, so he was pissed off at her. No need to take it out on women in general, or on the guys who’d left. It hadn’t really bothered him that they’d found happiness. What bothered him was he hadn’t found the happiness he’d craved to find with Eve. Before he could profess his love for her, she’d been kidnapped, had escaped her captors, claimed memory loss, then refused to talk to them and subsequently disappeared with the mystery woman.

  He forced his anger aside and urged himself to drag a log stump to the opposite side of the fire from her. He had the feeling it was going to be an awfully long night.

  * * * *

  Eve thought she’d been cold earlier, after her parting with C.J. and then while traveling the trails and being blasted by the icy RockyMountain winds. She realized that she was even colder now as the three men stared at her. For almost two years they’d been strangers, except now, in the way her heart smiled as she looked at them and in the way her body burned for them, she knew they’d been much more than strangers. Her memories told her that she’d been intimate with them. Her emotions said they were important to her. But there were still missing pieces, and she just couldn’t remember all of her time with them. Did that make any sense?

  She could read the questions in their eyes. Why had she refused to see them after she’d escaped her kidnappers? Why had she gone off with a strange, hostile woman? Who had kidnapped her? What had her kidnappers done to her? Why couldn’t she remember them? The list went on in her head, and suddenly she felt so overwhelmed she had to bite her bottom lip to prevent herself from breaking down into tears.

  These three men were her men. She knew that without a doubt. Knew it in her heart that they were the three men she’d fallen in love with. She’d loved the way they looked at her. Remembered the amusement sparking their eyes when she’d teased them into having sex with her. She’d wanted them to make love to her on a daily basis, but she’d had fooled herself into thinking they’d wanted her that much. Truth was, she was addicted to the three of them.

  The tallest one was Kayne Durango, their leader. He’d been a builder before the Catastrophe struck. He had the bulging, gorgeous muscles to prove it, and despite those muscles being hidden beneath layers of winter clothing and tight jeans, she remembered every intimate part of his body right down to the exceptionally long cock with the purplish mushroom-shaped cockhead. And she remembered how much she loved his light blue eyes when they searched the vista of the mountains for any sign of life and how they darkened when he made love to her.

  And Riley Raine. Self-confessed computer geek, pre-Catastrophe days. He was the most well hung of the three, and bald. Nicely bald. His silky caffe latte skin felt so smooth not only on his head but over his entire body, feeling like luscious brown velvet beneath her fingers every time she’d stroked his flesh with her fingertips. His eyes were so dark brown they were almost black, but those eyes always smiled when he looked at her. Dark shadows still caressed his chin and cheeks. It was as if she’d never left. He still looked the same. As he watched her studying him, he flashed his white teeth at her, and her breath stilled beautifully inside her chest. He looked so sexy when he smiled at her.

  Maddox Burns, with his medium brown dreamy eyes. He had the shortest, spikiest, softest sandy-brown hair that curled just beneath his ears and stuck up in places as if he’d just gotten out of bed. It had always done that, and she just loved how cute and bedroomy it made him look. He was their hunter, their scout, and their gang doctor. Pre-Catastrophe days, he’d been a paramedic who’d enjoyed hunting deer. She remembered every intimate detail on him, too, right down to the elevated veins lacing his thick, short shaft.

  Over the past few weeks she’d remembered glimpses of their intense sex life and sincerely felt her emotions concerning them.

  But she still couldn’t understand how in the world she’d fallen for three guys. It just wasn’t possible. Yet it was possible, because that’s exactly what she’d done. Or at least that’s what her heart was telling her now as she gazed upon them. Her body, however, was suddenly not reacting in such a nice way as she vibrated from the coldness of their stares. She forced herself to calm down.

  C.J. had told her she may never regain her memory. Her friend wasn’t a doctor or anything like that, but she’d read stories about people getting conked on their heads and either not remembering who they were or losing memory of their loved ones. Some regained their memories. Some didn’t.

  Eve had accepted that news and had tried to move on with her life. It had been relatively easy starting with a blank slate, but then the strong feelings and fragmented visions had begun to bombard her. That’s when C.J. had revealed that Eve had once been with the Durango Gang. The same men who had been so concerned for her after she’d escaped her captors. The men she hadn’t wanted to see because she didn’t remember them.

  “Why are you here?” Riley asked, thrusting her from her thoughts.

  “She said she needs us to help her remember our relationship,” Maddox explained, not allowing her to answer directly.

  “Take a breath and just tell us what’s going on, Eve,” Kayne urged, obviously noticing her uneasiness and becoming impatient with her because of it. He’d never liked it when she wasn’t happy.

  “I’m remembering things.”

  They all blinked in stunned silence. Two sets of brown eyes and a pair of light blue ones. All surprised. Obviously this was the last thing they’d expected for her to say.

  She began to shake. Uncontrollably. She couldn’t stand to see their stunned expressions.

  “Like what?” Maddox said softly.

  Eve’s heart sunk. Now that she was here, she wasn’t sure what to say or where to begin because she sure as hell didn’t know what was going on herself.

  “Eve…” Riley prodded.

  “Are you remembering what happened to you while you were in captivity? Do you remember who took you? Do you remember us?” Kayne asked.

  She grimaced at his questions and saw the hope flashing in his eyes.

  “No…well, yes. Some things I can remember. I remembered many things about Maddox when I just saw him.” And the feelings for Riley and Kayne when she’d just seen them standing there by the chopping block staring at her had just about overwhelmed her. The flashbacks she’d been experiencing were nothing compared to what she was feeling racing through her system now. She knew in her heart she cared for them and loved them.

  She wanted to tell them that flashes of their scorching sex life had been burning her up and arousing her to no ends. That those sensual visions of the four of them together, sexually, were making her feel naughty and needy for them. But maybe she’d better not tell them these things. Not yet anyways.

  “I think I know where he’s hidden the gold,” she blurted out. She didn’t know why she’d said that. She’d planned on waiting a few days to announce the discovery of the gold bars. She’d wanted to feel the men out. See if she could trust them, even though deep inside of her she knew
she could.

  Maybe because the hope about her remembering them was shining so brightly in their eyes, making her feel too intense and overwhelmed, and she needed to change the subject and take the focus off herself?

  At her admission, they all fell silent and stared at her.

  “Gold? Who’s hidden what gold?” Kayne asked as he cocked his head slightly to the left side in curiosity and continued to stare at her as if she might be crazy.

  “The gold bars you were looking for that morning at that bank…the last morning we were all together. The morning I was taken from you.”

  She heard them all swear softly beneath their breaths. The hope flared deeper in their eyes, and they moved on their seats with apparent excitement. She felt a very nice warmth shift inside of her, blowing away that coldness.

  “Then you really are remembering? Who took you, Eve?” Kayne whispered. She saw something else flare in Kayne’s eyes. Rage at the person who’d hurt her. At what this person or persons had done to them, ripping them apart and interfering with their lives. That rage terrified her. She wanted to break eye contact with him, but she couldn’t, and she knew she had to tell them some of what she remembered.

  “It was Wolfe. One of his men.”

  They blinked at her, totally stunned. She continued. “The man found me behind the bank with the horses. I don’t remember much. Just getting hit in the head. Waking up. C.J. helping me escape. Lots of it is still a blur, but I know where Wolfe’s main hideout is…or at least I think I do…if I remember right. If he still uses it…I’m not sure. The gold might still be there.”

  She knew she was babbling, but now that she’d started talking, it seemed as if a dam had burst inside of her. She wanted to tell them more. Wanted to tell them her intense feelings of love for them. That she wanted to get her life back. But she forced herself to hold back any more information as they gazed at her and digested everything she’d just told them.

  For a few seconds, silence unlike anything she’d ever experienced before enveloped the air around them. She swore the wind stopped howling, and it seemed as if time literally stood still. Kayne didn’t so much as blink. The other two didn’t even breathe, for if they had, she knew she would have heard them.

  Then as what she’d said sank in, all three of them swore. Violently. Loudly. And she welcomed the roaring sound of the wind as it shot through their shadowy camp because it dampened the sounds of their anger.

  Rage thickened the air around her, and that intense cold slithered deeper through her, and she shivered harder. She hadn’t expected this type of reaction from them or from her. Hadn’t expected the fear for their safety rolling through her like a dark wave. She realized now she should have kept silent.

  “Wolfe surrounds himself with gunslingers. Men and women who, before the Catastrophe, had experience with weapons. They know how to shoot. They’re very good. Before the Catastrophe they were avid marksmen, army people, and hunters.”

  Instantly she knew Maddox, Riley, and Kayne didn’t have as much experience with weapons. They’d only taken up shooting as a matter of survival.

  “That fucking bastard,” Riley snapped. “I will kill him.”

  “What did he do to you? Did he hurt you?” Kayne’s cold question sent the raw chills deeper into her flesh. His face was pale now. Ashen, despite it being red from the cold only moments ago. She knew what Kayne was asking, and it didn’t have anything to do with the head injury she’d sustained. He wanted to know if Wolfe and his men had raped her.

  Eve shook her head and hugged herself.

  “I can’t remember. I don’t think so.” Did she even want to remember, if that’s what had happened to her?

  Kayne’s intense gaze held hers. Trapped her like she was a butterfly being pinned to an insect collector’s canvas. She held her head up in defiance and squared her shoulders. Even if she had been raped. It was none of their business.

  “Why did you come back to us, Eve?” Riley asked. His voice sounded so soft, it almost unraveled her. Emotions, thick and raw, welled, and she pushed them back inside of her. Now was not the time to lose it.

  “Because I need to explore these feelings I’m experiencing about the three of you. I need to find my past. I want to get the gold bars so I can—” She cut herself off. They didn’t need to know her reason for getting the gold. “I want revenge against Wolfe for taking my memory, and with my help we can take what we couldn’t take back then.”

  Maddox smiled, and it seemed as if he was laughing at her. “We?” he asked. His smile widened to the point where she got the feeling he thought she was just some useless woman who was only good enough for them to bed.

  Anger, sharp and bitter, snapped through Eve. Suddenly that emotion of uselessness seemed very familiar. She didn’t like this feeling. Not one bit. It answered a lot of questions as to why she instinctively didn’t want to share more of her feelings with them.

  “Perhaps I shouldn’t have come here?” she muttered, pressing hard against the despair shooting through her that they may not want her here. She hoped they would reassure her she had come to the right place. They didn’t.

  Shit. They weren’t going to make this easy for her, were they?

  “Why do you think we’re going to take you along on a dangerous run? If you say he’s surrounded by gunslingers like in some old West movie, why would we risk your life? We don’t want a repeat performance of that last robbery attempt,” Kayne taunted.

  She wasn’t surprised at that question. Had expected it.

  “Because, now you have me. I can shoot better than all three of you, that’s why.” Or at least she hoped she could. For all she knew they could have been practicing since she’d been gone.

  To her irritation, all three men grinned as if they thought she was toying with them.

  She wasn’t. Pre-Catastrophe days, C.J. had been a trained LAPD sniper, and she’d shown Eve how to shoot. She was, in every way a gun counted, their equal. Maybe better.

  “Prove it,” Maddox ordered.

  She tensed as he produced a gun from inside his jacket. He was about to toss it to her when she shook her head.

  “I’ll use my rifle,” she said. She made a move to stand and get her weapon from the scabbard on her horse when Maddox shook his head.

  “An expert can use any gun. Are you saying you can only use your rifle?”

  Actually, she had used a couple of other weapons, a shotgun included, but her rifle had been given to her as a gift, and it fit her like a glove. She smiled inwardly. The guys didn’t have to know that.

  “Fine, I’ll use yours.”

  He threw her his pistol, and she caught it with both hands. She tested its weight. It weighed much lighter than her rifle, and she stifled her surprise that maybe she just might not be able to move it as good as hers. She slipped off the safety catch.

  “Shoot that seedling at the top of that outcrop of rocks,” Maddox instructed and pointed through the darkness.

  Like she could see anything. She squinted and held up a hand against the firelight. Then she saw the tiny speck about thirty feet up.

  God, was he kidding? And then she remembered the number one rule she’d been taught. If you can see it, you can hit it. If you can’t see it, you can hit it.

  She grinned as a familiar wave of confidence swept through her. She could do this. She had to hit it.

  Aiming the pistol, she raised it and braced the handle with both hands. She took a bead and slowly pulled the trigger. There was hardly any kickback, which was nice, and the blast just about deafened her, but she saw rocks fly into the air and watched the seedling disintegrate.

  Damn! She did it!

  She lowered the weapon and held back a whoop of joy as she watched the men’s faces. Despite their disinterested looks, she swore she caught glimmers of admiration in each of their eyes. Approval they struggled to hide. Or maybe it was just wishful thinking on her part?

  “Shoot this,” Riley shouted, and he tossed something in
to the air.

  Swiftly, she snapped the pistol upward and aimed at the item, which looked like a coin. Confidently, she pulled the trigger, and the gun roared, followed immediately by the metallic ping that echoed through the camp.

  “Okay, so who taught you?” Kayne asked, his voice sounding low and husky. His gaze, their gazes, now twinkled freely with appreciation.

  Yeah, she liked that they seemed awed.

  “That is my business. Now will you help me get the gold? Or do I go in alone?” she asked and heaved the pistol back to Maddox, who caught it with ease.

  “You tell us where their hideout is, and we’ll go in and get the gold and split it four ways,” Maddox said.

  Eve shook her head, and he frowned. Sadness swept through her. She knew he was only looking out for her safety. Despite her good shooting, she sensed he still thought of her as a helpless female, who was available to him for a quick fuck and to cook him a hearty meal. She realized she’d wanted more than that from these three. Much more.

  “No, I go with you. Call it insurance that I’ll get half of the gold bars. Not that I don’t trust you guys. I do. I just want to make sure I’ve earned my share of it.”

  “Half?” Riley blinked, obviously surprised at her wanting so much of the take.

  “Without me, you have nothing,” she stated, staring at him until he slowly nodded in understanding.

  “Let me think about it,” Kayne replied.

  “Kayne, she may get hurt,” Riley chastised, and despite the concern in his voice, his objection irritated the daylights out of her.

  “Yeah, look what happened the last time,” Maddox chimed in.

  “She’s got plenty of time to keep proving she’s a good shot on the trail, if I decide she comes.”

  The sultry way Kayne looked at her when he spoke those last two words sent fiery shivers sweeping through her. Instinctively she knew he didn’t mean if she was coming with them on the trail. He meant something sexual. Suddenly she felt as if she were sitting across from a sexual volcano ready to explode. Actually, three volcanoes. She knew she shouldn’t be saying these next words. Knew she should put down her own rules for them to follow. But her stupid mouth seemed to have taken on a will of its own.