“The song does say that love is a battlefield.”
Shelly laughed loud enough to draw looks from the neighboring tables.
The women ate happily together, making small talk about the food. Phaedra ate every morsel on her plate and finished the fruit plate, too. Shelly grinned. Phaedra was definitely embracing eating for two.
“Now that we’ve gotten the fun stuff out of the way, on to business,” Shelly said.
Phaedra groaned. “Do we have to? I was in such a good mood.”
“I want you to stay in a good mood, but this is important. I spoke to Logan yesterday.”
Phaedra groaned and put her head in her hands.
“Don’t be so dramatic. I explained to him that getting upset with you didn’t give him a chance to consider things from your point of view. He seemed like he might be receptive. Have you spoken to him?”
“No. I can’t. All I was doing was considering his side. Why couldn’t he consider mine?”
“Because he’s a man, sweetie. I’m sure he’s thought about it since our talk yesterday. But he is used to processing things in an analytical manner. There is no room for that when love is involved.”
“I guess you’re right.”
“Besides, if you had just talked to him instead of holding back this information, things might have gone differently.
“So, this is my fault.”
“Oh, both of you are pig headed. I’m not placing blame. I’m trying to help.”
“It doesn’t feel much like help,” Phaedra grumbled.
“I can be more helpful. What does your schedule look like this week?”
“Why?”
“Because I’m the one asking the questions here,” Shelly said firmly.
“Fine. I have an ultrasound on Monday at two. The rest of the week is the usual photo editing, marketing, and website updates.”
“I can work with one outside appointment and working from home.”
“What is that supposed to mean?”
“Nothing. Let’s go somewhere fun. Do you want to go baby shopping or to the Museum of Modern Art?”
“If we go baby shopping, I might cry. But the MOMA sounds fun. I haven’t been there in ages. Walking off some of this food sounds like a great idea.”
“Wonderful. It’s your treat. Let’s go.”
Phaedra laughed while Shelly requested the check from their server. After their meal was paid for, Phaedra and Shelly grabbed a cab and headed to the museum. As a photographer, Phaedra appreciated art in all of its forms. This trip was no exception.
Phaedra walked from room to room and felt her inspiration growing. There were so many mediums and displays that caught her eye. People were doing things artistically that Phaedra had never considered. Every time she stepped foot in this building she saw something new and intriguing. One day, she’d like to have her photographs adorning the walls of this place.
“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you this quiet,” Shelly said with a smirk.
“I guess you don’t take me on the right dates,” Phaedra replied.
Shelly linked her arm through Phaedra’s. “I can’t wait for you to bring the baby here and share your love of art. Then, Logan can bring the baby to the courtroom and share his love of arguing.”
They both giggled. It struck Phaedra that while she and Logan had gone on plenty of work appropriate dates, like fundraisers and dinners, they hadn’t gone on creative dates. Or, tried something that played to their strengths. They should try that. It might go a long way. Even a photography walk would be a nice diversion. If they did get this all sorted out, she would be sure to mention it to him.
“Oh no. I’ve ruined your good mood,” Shelly said, pursing her lips. “I’m sorry. I just love seeing the two of you together so much. Besides, the fight can’t be that bad if you’re still wearing your ring.”
Phaedra looked down at her ring. She hadn’t even thought about taking it off. Since they first started this adventure, the ring felt like a part of her. Logan did too. She gave Shelly a weak smile.
“I just hope Logan believes that, too,” Phaedra said.
Shelly patted Phaedra’s arm reassuringly as they continued to walk arm in arm. Phaedra knew that whatever happened, good or bad, Shelly would be there for her. That meant a lot. In times like this, she would need a friend.
Chapter Twenty
Logan
Logan’s weekend went by with a flurry of activity. He picked up the phone to call Phaedra at least fifty-seven times, but each time he hung up before it would ring. He missed her. He was sorry, too, but his feelings were still hurt.
He wasn’t sure how he might make this right. Logan decided to take out his frustrations on his home. He reorganized his home office, alphabetized his files, and washed his floors. Logan even dusted under his bed, which quite frankly he wasn’t sure he had ever done before.
When he started in on his sock drawer, he realized he might be going too far. Logan wondered if he would have had time to do all of this if Phaedra had been around. Had he been neglecting anything else because he was in love?
Then he remembered who he was talking about, himself. While Logan was a fairly neat man, it never occurred to him to reorganize his socks. The most thought he ever put into a sock drawer before was to open it when he threw his socks inside. The level of organization wasn’t important to him as long as he could find a matching pair of socks. Right now, Logan would do anything if it meant not facing his girlfriend.
Logan hadn’t heard a word from Shelly since she read him the riot act on Friday. Phaedra still hadn’t called. That had to be a bad sign. Phaedra wasn’t the type of woman that put her business on social media. She liked to keep things professional, mentioning only photography and upcoming events that were open to the public.
He knew that Phaedra wouldn’t post anything about the baby, so he didn’t bother to look. Logan wondered what was happening with the baby. He wasn’t a total Neanderthal. He knew a thing or two about the stages of pregnancy.
At this point, Phaedra couldn’t be more than a few months pregnant. The baby would be very small. He wondered if the baby had started kicking yet. She hadn’t mentioned any ultrasounds. Their fight hadn’t left much time for Logan to ask questions.
Logan was kicking himself for that now. He’d spent the better half of the day making his place magazine ready. He didn’t have much left to do. Logan decided it was time to do some research. Choosing a pregnancy website was tough. Most seemed geared toward mothers. He managed to locate one that was gender neutral and not condescending. Some of them made him feel like an idiot for not knowing more.
There was so much to learn. Based on the information that Logan found, the fact that she knew for sure she was pregnant meant she was pretty far along. She wouldn’t tell people she was pregnant otherwise. Most people don’t notice anything is amiss for the first month or two. He should have asked exactly how far along she was. Logan knew he could ask Shelly, but she would just tell him to call Phaedra.
Logan found more information than he could ever expect to process. They even had a chart that compared baby size to various fruits. At one stage the baby was the size of a grape. At a later stage, an orange. Logan wondered who came up with this idea. Wasn’t there anything else to compare babies to? Perhaps something that wasn’t edible? What about sports? They could have used golf balls, tennis balls, volleyballs, and basketballs. Pregnancy culture was strange.
Logan just hoped that they were both okay. Despite having never met this baby, he loved it already. Now that he thought about it, Logan had been around the baby. If Phaedra was a few months pregnant, he had been around the baby quite a bit. He tried to think back to any time he might have caught a glimpse of her belly. He hadn’t noticed any new roundness.
Phaedra didn’t seem to be gaining weight. She had been eating a lot lately, but Phaedra always had a healthy appetite. The pregnancy was probably why she had fallen asleep on the couch after he cooked for her. If he h
ad known that she was carrying his child, he would have cooked for her every day. He should have ordered her fancy desserts or baked her some cookies.
Suddenly, Logan felt like he had done the bare minimum. In law, it was never good to provide the minimum viable product, and that’s exactly what he had done with Phaedra. Yes, he loved her. He spent time with her, but with this pregnancy, all he had done was to cook her one meal and get in a fight with her.
That’s not the kind of father or husband he wanted to be. Logan wanted to be hands-on father. A wave of guilt washed over him. He felt like he needed to do something big. He couldn’t make a grand gesture if he was too afraid to pick up the phone.
Shelly was probably up to something, but there was nothing he could do about that. Right now, all he could do was learn. Logan was determined to read everything he could find on pregnancy and childbirth so that when the time came, he would be ready. Phaedra was going above and beyond to grow an entire person. Logan needed to do the same to support her.
* * *
Monday morning, Logan went to work as usual. He didn’t have any further tension with Shelly. Their relationship was back to normal and Logan was relieved. He checked his calendar and things seemed typical for a Monday. The only outlier was an offsite meeting with a new client, but that was a common occurrence. Shelly was a little quieter than usual, but in high spirts. Logan assumed she was waiting for him to tell her about a reconciliation with Phaedra. He wished he had one to tell her about. Logan was still trying to figure out how to approach that situation.
Logan went through his day with as much focus as he could muster. He tried not to let thoughts of Phaedra distract him too much. Based on his research, she should be nearing the end of her first trimester. Logan couldn’t wait until she started to show, which could be any day now. He hadn’t seen her in a few days. He hoped he hadn’t missed it. Logan wanted to experience the baby belly firsthand.
When Logan left the office, he tried giving Phaedra a call. She didn’t pick up. He tried not to let that get to him. It was the middle of the day; she might be at a shoot. A phone call before heading into a meeting wasn’t the best time to try to reconcile things with your pregnant girlfriend. Logan needed to take his time with that apology, so maybe it was for the best.
Logan got out of his cab and took the elevator up to the office that he was going to visit at Bridges Diagnostic Medical Sonography. He walked into the room and froze. Phaedra was sitting in the waiting room. She was scrolling through her ereader with her hand protectively over her belly. Phaedra must have come here for an appointment.
Before he could say anything, Phaedra looked up at him, as if sensing his presence. Her mouth opened and closed in surprise. Now Logan knew what Shelly’s master plan was. She had tricked him into a meeting with Phaedra. Shelly had never approved of the women in his life, but clearly she approved of Phaedra.
Logan nearly dropped his briefcase and rushed over to her. Phaedra looked hesitant, but Logan threw his arms around her in a warm embrace.
“Phaedra, what are you doing here?”
“I could ask you the same thing, but I think we both know why you’re here.”
“Shelly,” they both said in unison.
Phaedra gave Logan a weak smile.
“I didn’t know you were going to be here,” Logan said. “Shelly just put a meeting on my calendar. I’m so glad she did. If I knew you were coming, I would have come anyway.”
“Really?” Phaedra asked. Her eyes glistened with tears that threatened to fall.
“Of course. We’ve got a little ring bearer or flower girl to train. We have to get started early,” Logan said carefully.
Logan knew that it wasn’t an apology, but it was the best he could come up with on such short notice. Plus, they were in the middle of a waiting room and people were watching them. They didn’t have much time to go through their thoughts about the baby because the nurse came and called them back for the sonogram.
Chapter Twenty-One
Phaedra
Phaedra was never more grateful for a meddling friend than she was today. She saw Logan’s call on her way into the doctor’s office, but she was afraid that he would say something to upset her. Phaedra didn’t want to cry in the waiting room. She wasn’t looking forward to another solo appointment, but there was no viable alternative until Logan walked in.
The fact that Logan seemed excited about the baby was a good sign. Then, when he mentioned their wedding, her heart soared. Their wedding plans might not have been real, but their baby was as real as it got.
When the nurse called her name, she didn’t know what to do. They had no choice but to go inside. Logan followed closely behind her with his hand on the small of her back. Phaedra was so grateful to have his support. She was interested to see how he would react to the ultrasound.
The preliminary ultrasound at the doctor’s office had not prepared her for a real one. Her doctor, Christine, had used a portable unit that could be wheeled from room to room. This unit was larger with a big screen. It looked like top-of-the-line equipment. The sonographer was going to measure the baby for size today. Phaedra had no idea how that would work, but she was anxious to find out.
Her belly was still small. It was just starting to round out, but not big enough that she needed to wear bigger clothes. When she was prepped for her sonogram, she saw the look of surprise on Logan’s face. Phaedra wasn’t sure if he still found her attractive until she saw a small smile on his face. She wanted to cry with relief. It seemed like a small, unimportant, detail. His smiles were so much better than his frowns.
“I’m so glad that we have Mommy and Daddy here today. Sometimes, both parents can’t make it. That’s totally understandable, but it’s always awkward when Dad shows up alone,” the sonographer said with a laugh. The silly joke was enough to put Phaedra at ease.
“I don’t think I would look as good in that jelly as she does.” Logan smiled.
Phaedra giggled hard enough to make her belly wiggle.
“I think you’re right about that. Also, that wouldn’t have told us much about the baby. Let’s have a look and see what we can find out.”
The technician was very professional as he explained the process. As soon as the wand touched her belly, she heard the familiar whooshing noise of the baby’s heartbeat. Phaedra was comforted by the sound. She had no reason to believe that there was anything wrong with the baby, but it was still great to hear.
“What’s that sound?” Logan asked.
“That’s our baby’s heartbeat.”
Logan grabbed Phaedra’s hand. He gave a short nod, his eyes shining. He really was happy to be there.
“Are you two waiting to be surprised, or did you want to know the sex of the baby today?”
“It isn’t too soon to find out?” Phaedra asked.
Logan tightened his grip considerably. Phaedra winced, and he loosened up. “Sorry. I was caught by surprise. I thought you would have to have a big belly for that.”
The sonographer laughed. “Don’t worry. A lot of dads have no idea what’s going on.”
“We haven’t really talked about the boy or girl reveal yet,” Phaedra said.
“No time like the present,” the sonographer replied.
Phaedra knew she wouldn’t be able to handle the suspense of waiting her whole pregnancy. “I would love to know. The sooner we know the sooner we can start picking out baby names.”
Logan nodded in agreement.
“Perfect. Well, since you both want to know and I’m measuring the legs next, we might be able to tell. Your baby is in perfect position. Let’s have a look underneath.” The sonographer was beaming. “Do you see what I see?”
Logan and Phaedra looked at each other. Neither of them wanted to admit that they didn’t see anything. The sonographer saw their confused glances.
“Not to worry. I do this all day, so I might see more than you do. I know what to look for. What I see here is your daughter.”
“Hot damn!” Logan exclaimed.
“I take it that’s good news.”
“Any healthy baby would be good news. We’re just happy to know,” Phaedra said.
“That’s what I like to hear. Let’s finish up the rest of our check and you two can be on your way. I’ll even make you a print and a video of the ultrasound to take with you.”
Once they were done, they walked out of the office hand-in-hand. Their earlier argument was all but forgotten.
“How did you get here? Did you drive, or were you in the city?” Logan asked.
“I drove. I wasn’t in the mood for public transportation. I was off today, working from home.”
“I took a cab over from the office. I’m sure I can have Shelly cover for me if I took the rest of the day off. Do you mind if I ride with you?”
“I don’t mind. We have some talking to do, anyway.”
“You’re right. We do.”
When they got to her car, Logan delicately took the keys from Phaedra and unlocked the car doors. If he wanted to drive, she wasn’t going to stop him. All she wanted to do was stare at the pictures of their baby. A healthy baby girl. Hopefully, she would be a happy baby, too. Everything was great, and Mommy and Daddy were here together.
Since Logan was driving, Phaedra didn’t pay attention to where they were going until she noticed that they were off the beaten path.
“Where are you taking me? Why are we in the Bronx?”
“After seeing something so beautiful, I thought we should keep that going. I figured that you might like to see the botanical gardens.”
“That’s a wonderful idea. I’d love that.”
When they arrived at the botanical gardens Logan rushed around the car to help Phaedra out before she could even open the door. They walked the botanical gardens in silence at first, just enjoying each other’s company. Phaedra didn’t know where to begin, and it seemed like Logan didn’t either.
Her Focus: Exposed to Love: Book Two Page 6