Crazy For You (Last Frontier Lodge Novels Book 8)

by J. H. Croix

  Just to be let the waiter win, Sawyer ordered the same coffee with Kahlua she did. As the waiter turned away he called out. “Add a beer to that.”

  A balled up napkin bounced off of his shoulder. He glanced back to her to see her eyes snapping and her cheeks flushed. “Not fair! You’re not even going to drink the coffee and Kahlua.”

  Heat went straight to his groin. He wanted to yank her across the table into his lap. Not the time and place for that though, so he shrugged. “Maybe I will. The beer’s my back up.”

  She rolled her eyes and leaned back, brushing her hair off her shoulders. “Oh, fine.”

  “Hey, I just wanted the guy to win the bet with you. This way he’ll get his five dollars plus our tip.”

  Her eyes widened and then she laughed. “Oh that’s perfect! I wouldn’t have held him to the bet. I was just teasing.”

  “Good to know.”

  Violet was quiet for a moment. She idly fiddled with the tie on her blouse, a tie that had been ridiculously tempting for him all evening. He wanted to rip it open and tear her shirt off. Her generous breasts curved up over the top, but he wanted to see more. She was just plain delectable.

  The last few months he’d been so out of sorts he hadn’t even considered dating, much less sex. She made him forget all of that and put everything in perspective. All he had to deal with was a cranky knee and a little shrapnel. He could do that if he had more of Violet to keep his attention elsewhere.

  A short while later, they were walking out into the cool evening. Sawyer had quickly discovered evenings in Alaska seemed almost endless. Dusk lasted for hours with the sun starting its descent in late evening and light lingering until close to midnight. At the moment, the sky above the mountains was streaked with pink and purple, fading into the soft darkness. A half moon was rising above the bay in the distance. A raven called nearby, the distinct sound of its wings swishing through the air following its call.

  His hand naturally landed on Violet’s back, just where it dipped at her waist. The temptation to let his palm slide over the curve of her lush bottom was almost too much, but he managed. They walked in silence to his truck. He reached for the door right as she turned to glance up. The second her gaze caught his, a jolt of lust shot straight through him.

  Her lips were right there, inches away. The air felt charged, the electricity between them humming to life. He waited a moment, forcing himself to give her the chance to turn away. She didn’t. He could see the rapid beat of her pulse in her neck, her breath coming in short pants, mimicking his own. On the heels of the only deep breath he could manage, he closed the distance between them and fit his mouth over hers.

  Oh damn. Kissing her was better than he remembered. Her lips were plush and warm. She turned more fully to him with a sigh. He swept his tongue inside her mouth and stepped closer, one hand resting on the truck door behind her and the other threading into her silky hair. She drove him just as mad as she had last time he’d kissed her. Once their mouths met, she threw herself into it—her tongue tangled with his and she flexed against him. Holy hell, she felt so damn good—all lush curves against his hardness. He couldn’t get enough and kissed her as if his life depended on it. Soft sounds came from her throat, driving him wilder inside. By the time he broke free to gulp in air, he had pressed her into his truck, every inch of her plastered against him. His cock was so hard, he was on the verge of exploding. He let his head fall into the sweet curve of her neck, breathing her in—she carried the subtle scent of vanilla with something tart mixed in.

  Her breasts rose and fell with her breath, and he could’ve stayed right there for hours, savoring the feel of her. For the first time in months, he felt like himself again—his body nearly vibrating with the force of his desire for her. An odd side effect was a sense of strength and aliveness he hadn’t felt since his injury. As they stood there, sounds eventually filtered into his awareness, and it occurred to him they were in a parking lot in public view. Oh sure, where they happened to be standing they were shielded from the main entrance to the restaurant, but it wasn’t exactly private. He didn’t give a damn, but wondered if perhaps Violet did.

  He reluctantly lifted his head. She’d leaned her head back against the truck and opened her eyes slowly when he looked to her. In the smudgy light of dusk, he could still see the deep blue of her gaze, which was darker than usual. The air around them felt weighted with their desire. He stayed quiet, as she did as well. For several beats, they simply stared at each other. She swallowed and gave her head a little shake when a raven’s call broke through the silence.

  She licked her lips, and blood shot to his groin again. He was plenty aroused already, but damn she needed to stop that if he was going to keep a grip here.

  “I suppose we should go,” she finally said, her words husky.

  He stared back at her, scrambling for purchase in his mind. He might not have been too focused on women since his injury and not had a life that allowed much room for them before that, but he’d certainly been more suave than this. He tried to recall if he’d ever been so muddled and caught by the whims of his body and was pretty damn certain he hadn’t. He didn’t want to move because that meant this moment would end—this moment with Violet soft against him, her lips swollen from their kiss and her cheeks rosy.

  He was winging it, but he wasn’t letting go that easy. He took a breath and steeled himself. “Probably, but I’d be lying if I said I wanted to have tonight end here.”

  Her breath drew in sharply, and her eyes widened. His body reacted on its own, his hips flexing just enough to feel the heat of her against his rock-hard cock. She bit her lip, a soft sound escaping and then pinned him with those sexy-as-hell eyes, sharp and snappy now.

  “Not fair,” she muttered.

  He shrugged. “You existing isn’t really fair, at least not as far as my body’s concerned.”

  She laughed, her head falling back, tempting him to taste her neck. So he leaned forward and nipped, grinning in satisfaction at the goose bumps that rose on her skin.

  “That’s definitely not fair,” she said, lifting her head again, her silky hair falling around her shoulders.

  She didn’t move and lifted a hand to trace along his collarbone. Damn if that single point of contact didn’t send a jolt of electricity through him. “Okay then. Drive me home.” She held his gaze for a long moment, the air taut around them. “You can walk me in.”

  He didn’t know with certainty what that meant, but he’d take every moment she offered. With alacrity, he stepped back and ushered her into the car.

  Violet was fairly certain she might melt into a puddle in Sawyer’s truck. That’s how hot and bothered she was. She supposed she could count herself lucky the truck had been conveniently right behind her when Sawyer kissed her. Otherwise, she’d have fallen at his feet, awash in sensation. The space inside his truck felt electric. Meanwhile, she wondered just what the hell she’d gotten herself into. In the midst of her earlier obsessions about whether to call off this dinner date altogether, it had occurred to her Sawyer was only here temporarily. As far as her sources of gossip knew, he’d come to stay with his family while he recuperated. Those same sources of gossip also presumed he’d be returning to duty as a Navy SEAL once he was fully recovered. Violet didn’t know what the situation really was, but all signs pointed to the fact Sawyer wouldn’t be around too long. That tidbit had spun her in circles in her brain. Because her firm commitment to staying independent and not running the risk of falling for someone who wanted a family wasn’t threatened if she happened to have a fling with someone who wouldn’t be around long-term.

  Her body was all kinds of happy about that because sweet hell did she want Sawyer. Something fierce. Her conscience was relieved as well because then she didn’t have to worry about front-loading something casual with the announcement she didn’t intend to let things get serious. She could avoid the natural questions about that. Talk about putting a damper on things. When she’d stared down he
r infertility, she’d thought she could date here and there and have a little fun as long as everyone knew where she stood. When most of her friends were complaining they couldn’t find a guy who wanted to settle down, Violet promptly discovered that telling someone you couldn’t have children was like dumping ice water all over them. She never even got to find out what might’ve happened because that was the fastest way to turn a little flirting into nothing.

  She’d tried telling herself love and commitment weren’t inextricably linked to having children, yet the intellectual knowledge couldn’t seem to get past the emotional wall inside. Perhaps her emotions were tangled up in the way Ted dumped her, so abruptly on the heels of learning about her infertility, but the why and how didn’t change her conundrum. She preferred not to let her heart meander accidentally in the wrong direction again. Sawyer’s temporary stay here alleviated the burden of those worries for now.

  She glanced up and realized they were at her apartment. Sawyer turned the truck into the parking area to the side of the building where a set of stairs led up to the small deck outside of her apartment. He turned the engine off, and they sat there, the air heavy around them. She was almost afraid to look at Sawyer. She was so flustered from their kiss and so turned on, she feared she’d tackle him. He saved her by opening the driver’s side door.

  Out of habit, she started to open her own, only to have Sawyer reach her door just as she fumbled for the handle. He winked when he swung it open. “Beat you to it,” he said with a slow grin.

  She swallowed and pointlessly tried to slow her rocketing pulse. She managed to climb out without falling on her face, although her knees were weak. Annoyed with herself for being so ridiculously affected by Sawyer, she turned to face him once he closed the truck door behind her. She opened her mouth to say god knows what, and he smoothly leaned forward and fit his mouth over hers. The intense need coiled tightly inside snapped loose. Her purse fell to the ground as she curled her hand around his neck and tugged him to her. There was nothing tentative about his kisses, it was as if the moment he acted, it became definitive. He swept his tongue in her mouth boldly and drew back to trace her lips and nip at them before diving in again.

  Fire spread through her veins, and she stopped fighting her own battle against allowing herself to explore the madness. A distant siren rang inside. She simply couldn’t say no, more to herself than to Sawyer. She wouldn’t let it go too far. She’d just let herself have a little more than a few kisses. She tore her lips free with a gasp and grabbed his hand, pulling him behind her. She was half out of her mind with need, but she managed to recall he was dealing with a bum leg, so she didn’t run, although she moved as fast as she possibly could and still call it slow.

  She almost dropped her keys trying to open her door and then they stumbled through. The door clicked shut behind Sawyer. She dropped her purse and jacket to the floor and walked straight across the room to flick on a lamp in the corner. She turned to find Sawyer right behind her. Holy hell. He was all dark and strong, so damn sexy he took her breath away. She knew with certainty he left women swooning everywhere he went. Simply by existing with that dark hair, those steel gray eyes, and a body carved from stone, he was beyond delicious. Throw in the whole strong, sexy, military vibe where you just knew he’d save you if you needed saving, well that was more than swoon-worthy, it was panty-melting.

  Her control, which she’d been keeping a firm grip on for years now, was frayed. Her breath came in shallow pants as he advanced on her. He stopped a hairsbreadth away from her, his eyes tracking over her. Streaks of heat raced through her, and her channel throbbed. He lifted a hand and tugged on the bow holding her shirt together. With the slightest pull, it came undone. Her belly clenched and she could barely catch her breath as he traced along the edge of the curved neck of her shirt. In two slow sweeps, it fell open. Her breasts felt heavy and taut, aching for his touch.

  He dragged his finger across the sheer black silk of her bra, tracing a circle around one of her nipples, tight and begging for more. After he teased her mercilessly by doing the same to the other, he leaned forward and swiftly sucked her nipple into his mouth. She cried out, a jolt of hot pleasure scoring her. He stepped closer, and she thanked the stars she happened to be standing beside the back of the couch. Her hips bumped against it, but she didn’t collapse. He set to drive her simply mad, drenching the silk of her bra as he toyed with her nipples. By the time he flicked his thumb under the clasp in the center, low moans were breaking from her throat and she was so close to a climax, it stunned her. Her channel was drenched and throbbing, slick with her need. The air whispered over her damp skin when her bra fell open, her nipples tightening further in response.

  Sawyer lifted his head, his eyes locking with hers, his gaze dark. He was quiet, yet the intensity of his gaze sent a wash of heat through her. Without a word, he stepped back. For a flash, she felt bereft. Nothing more than a few inches between them, and she instantly wanted him right back where he’d been. Before she could form a thought, his lips closed over a nipple again, and she cried out. In seconds, he’d swiftly unbuttoned her jeans and slipped his hand inside, cupping her mound. Her hips were already rolling into his touch as he dragged his fingers back and forth over the silk between her thighs.

  He bit down softly on one of her nipples, and she cried out. Restless, her hands roamed over his chest and she sighed when she dragged a hand down over the hard ridge of his arousal. With a muttered swear, he lifted his head and stepped between her thighs, bringing his mouth against hers in a scalding kiss. Just as his tongue swept into her mouth, he shoved the silk out of the way and drove two fingers into her channel. She came instantly, pleasure tightening and then snapping inside, spiraling through her in sharp shocks as her channel convulsed around his fingers.

  He slowed his kiss and lifted his head. She was practically stunned, awash in pleasure and the pure release she felt. He slowly dragged his hand out and buttoned her jeans again. He started to put her bra back together when she realized he thought that was it. Oh no. She had to have more. Her need jolted her, and she pushed him back, roughly tearing his jeans open.

  “No, you don’t…” he started to say.

  “I don’t what?” she asked, cutting him off.

  “Need to do that,” he finished, his eyes scanning her face.

  “It’s not about need,” she snapped, annoyed, but she couldn’t say why. She wasn’t about to let him come in here and leave her nearly boneless without making sure he felt the same before she was done.

  He started to say something else, but groaned instead when she slid her hand over his briefs, curling her palm around his cock. She pushed his briefs out of the way and almost moaned when she saw his cock. Of course he’d have a gorgeous cock and of course, he was well-endowed. Nature had been beyond kind to Sawyer. It was like all of him, every inch just delectable. His skin was hot and velvety, and he groaned again when she leaned forward and dragged her tongue along each side of his cock. She didn’t wait to take it slow. That was for another time. She took him into her mouth, savoring the subtle salty flavor. If he meant to stop her, he didn’t try very hard. He mumbled her name once more and then one hand landed on the curve of her waist and the other gripped her hair. She held him lightly in her fist as she drew her mouth up and down the length of him.

  With a guttural cry, he came in a rush. After he started to relax, she slowly pulled back, wiping her sleeve across her mouth as she stood. When she got a look at his face, she couldn’t help but grin. He looked as stunned as she’d felt moments ago. She liked to be in control, so if she was going to lose it, it was only fair if she could turn the tables.

  She rested her hips on the back of the couch and put her clothes back together. After a moment, he turned and propped beside her, a low laugh escaping. “Well then. I, uh, guess I didn’t expect that.”

  She glanced sideways and saw he’d pulled his briefs and jeans back in place. His eyes scanned her face, and she suddenly felt vulne
rable. She didn’t know what he wanted. She reminded herself sternly that he was just here for a visit. She didn’t need to worry about what he wanted. Before she realized what she was doing, she was talking, stumbling over herself to get out ahead of this.

  “Well, that was fun. If you’re worried I have expectations, no need. I know you’re here temporarily, so nothing to worry about there,” she said. Hearing her own voice, the forced brightness made her want to cringe.

  Sawyer looked puzzled and almost hurt. She had to be imagining that. His eyes scanned her face. That tiny flash of hurt she thought she saw burrowed in her mind, a kernel of uncertainty forming. Her words had sounded so casual, as if she did this kind of thing easily. She didn’t. Her heart was greedy and wanted more, but her dream of love and children had already been shattered spectacularly. She couldn’t let herself think that glimmer in Sawyer’s eyes meant anything because then she’d start wanting things she couldn’t have.

  “I can’t say I had any expectations, but you make it sound like I’m just out for a little fun. Maybe I was once upon a time, and hell if I know what I expected, but I almost died a few months ago, so my perspective’s a little different. You don’t have to worry about expectations, but don’t assume I’m just some guy looking for a little fun. I don’t know what this…” He paused and gestured between them. “…is, but I know it’s more than that.”

  Her heart gave a hard kick, and her breath came out in a whoosh. Startled, her thoughts began spinning wildly, and she frantically reeled herself in. She stared back at him as he slowly straightened and faced her. He dipped his head and dropped a kiss on the side of her neck, sending a hot shiver through her. “Good night, Violet.”

  She was stuck where she was, incapable of moving it seemed, when he stopped by the door and looked back at her. “I’d like to see you again. My surgery’s in four days. How about dinner or something else the day after tomorrow?”

  She nodded swiftly. She might not be able to talk, but her body knew what she wanted even if her mind was spinning in circles.