Generations I: Book of Enlightenment

by Mia Castile

  “How’s Zeke?” Moriah had composed herself now and was standing in the doorway to the rooftop. She entered the living room and sat down on the couch.

  “Uh, he’s Zeke, you know, always busy,” he quickly answered as Gideon followed Moriah in. Gideon had all the food on a large plate. He sat it on the counter and looked at me nervously.

  “Yeah, I know. He’s not coming, is he?”

  “Zeke? No, he’s not coming,” Ben said with a slight edge in his voice as he looked toward Boss and took the salad to the table. I set down the plates. Selah took those to the table and set it. Gideon chimed in, “Moriah, we are going to have a good time. No exes.”

  “Just currents,” I whispered to him under my breath, adding a wink at the end. He smiled distractedly.

  “When did you get a dog?” Selah patted Boss’s head as she looked at Ben.

  “A few months ago, January-ish,” he said, as he took his place at the table. We ate dinner in silence. As we were cleaning up, Selah asked, “So I didn’t ask; how did you meet Ben?” Ben and I told her and Moriah the story. When we were done, they looked at each other and then back to us in amazement. Then we told them what had happened to Gideon, excluding why he was out in the first place. They didn’t say anything. Selah put her hand on Gideon’s shoulder. He winced in pain, and then his face softened. Selah smiled. Moriah took Gideon’s hand and led him to the rooftop. Ben and Selah began to wash the dishes. I lingered near the door trying not to eavesdrop but failing miserably. I wanted my brother to be happy. I tried to look busy, though, so no one would be onto me. Moriah sat down in the lawn chair. Gideon sat next to her.

  “How are you holding up?” Gideon asked, as he put his hand on hers.

  “Why didn’t you tell me he was coming? I could have prepared myself and not acted like a jerk.” She was looking up at the dark sky now.

  “I didn’t know. He bumped into Ellie today. He and his dog were here when I got home from work. I didn’t know you knew him—or his brother.” He paused.

  “Zeke and I haven’t talked for over a year. We were really good friends growing up. It was a mistake to date. All we did was talk on the phone, and we went out a couple times. We were too young to really date. It ended badly because we wanted different things. He couldn’t see my side, and I couldn’t see his. I don’t even think I loved him. I don’t think I’ve ever loved someone until. . .” She paused, not wanting to finish.

  “Until what? Go on.”

  “Until you. Gawd.” He smoothed the hair away from her face. Her eyes were filling with tears. “But what if it’s me and Zeke all over again.”

  “I’m not Zeke by any means, and I’ve wanted to be with you since the moment I first saw you. We became friends, and I love everything about you. You know me, and I know you. We can take things really slow. Starting with prom.” He looked down at his hands, and she looked at him as he continued, “I don’t want to get married tomorrow. I’m too young for that.” She chuckled at his joke. “We have at least four more years before our lives really begin. Whether we fall in love or not, I want you in my life forever.” He smoothed the tears that were running down her face.

  “I lost Zeke. I don’t want to lose you.”

  “You won’t. I promise.”

  “Prom?” she asked.

  “Yeah, you want to?”

  “Yeah.” He hugged her, and they smiled at each other, hoping it would all be OK.

  The night wound down and finally everyone was ready to leave. We said our goodbyes. Ben and Boss walked the girls to the bus stop, and then they walked home themselves. Everyone was going to call when they got home to make sure they made it safely. After they did, we went to bed.

  Chapter 8

  “We’ve gotta stop meeting like this,” I smirked as his shadow appeared in my doorway. It was dark, but I knew he was there.

  “Hey, I was supposed to wake you up.” He chuckled as he came over and sat on my bed. I sat up, then turned on the light. I began to tell him about what had happened, and he held up his hand to stop me. “I know all about it. I don’t want to talk about that though. There are so many other things I have to tell you. There are other things I want to talk about with you.” He paused. “But I can’t tell you those things either. Not yet.”

  “Why did you come then?” I was confused.

  “I needed to see you. I’ve. Missed. You.” He stuttered over that last statement, almost like he was struggling to get the words out.

  “You say things to me that aren’t fair.” What was wrong with me! This was the boy I’d dreamed about my whole life, and I was giving him the third degree.

  “What’s wrong?”

  “You’re not real. I dream about you. Sometimes we’re us; sometimes we’re someone else.” I was sad. I wanted more from him.

  “I know. I’ve been there every time. You think I’m a figment of your imagination?” His eyes looked past me at the wall, like he was trying to read something.

  “You are,” I sighed. I reached into my nightstand and produced my leather bound journals. “You inspired me to write these.” I tossed the books at him. “No real person is that inspiring.” These words were just coming out of me. This wasn’t how I really felt. Was it? I couldn’t stop myself. I was confused. I suddenly wanted to have a boyfriend. I wanted someone to go on dates with, too, and cuddle on the couch with. I wanted someone who Gideon could scrutinize and tell me he wasn’t good enough for me because I deserved the best and no one would be that. I was torn between something tangible and something made of dreams. He flipped through the books and read excerpts. I eyed him suspiciously. After a few minutes he looked at me and smiled.

  “What? I’m mad at you!” I argued, my face turning red.

  “No. You’re mad at our situation.” He waved the journal he held as he laid it down on top of the other books. He crawled up to me and lay beside me on the bed. I snuggled close to him.

  “This is why I came tonight. I needed to make sure you’re safe, and I wanted to feel safe with you. Don’t be mad at me. I can’t stand the thought of that.”

  “How serious is this stuff?” I rested my head on his shoulder.

  “The Noctem is the ultimate evil. He engulfs one of every generation. Our generation is still innocent, but The Noctem is growing stronger every day.”

  “Our generation is not innocent. There are kids committing crimes every day. They have some evil in them.”

  “You have to think beyond what you see. There is a war going on all around us. We can’t even see it, but we are talking about the ultimate evil. You need to ask your brother to walk you to and from work. You have to stay safe. You need protection.” He let out a sigh.

  “Don’t leave me tonight,” I whispered, as I closed my eyes and drifted to sleep.

  When I woke, the sun was breaking. He was still lying beside me sleeping. I looked at the clock. It said five o’clock. My alarm would sound in one hour. He stirred. He lifted his head and looked at me. He smiled.

  “I could wake up to that face every day.” He looked at my clock with a groan. “But I have to go. My mother might have noticed I’m gone, and that would be bad.”

  “Are you real?” I asked. My eyes searched his for the truth.

  “I’m as real as you.”

  “Then why aren’t you in my life, instead of just my dreams?”

  “The moments we share are life. We’ll be together again soon.” He squeezed me to him. He rose out of bed, went into the bathroom, and closed the door behind him. I sat up.

  “When?” I said, as I followed him to the door. I knocked on the door. There was no answer. “When?” I repeated and turned the knob. He was gone. I stood in the bathroom alone. I looked in the mirror at my reflection. “When?” I whispered again.

  I was sitting on a lounge chair on our rooftop wrapped up in the throw blanket from the couch when I heard Gideon’s footsteps. He was sipping a cup of coffee and had one for me. He sat down beside me but didn’t say anything. I did
n’t say anything either, so we sat there in silence for a while. Eventually Gideon stood up.

  “We have to get ready for school. We have a long day ahead of us.” He turned and walked into our apartment. I heard the shower start. I sat there a few minutes longer. When I heard the water turn off, I went to my room and decided what I would wear to school.

  Chapter 9

  “Are you going to your prom?” Ben asked, as he lounged across the foot of my bed, flipping through a magazine Selah had loaned me.

  “Probably not, especially since I haven’t been asked.” Prom wasn’t even on my radar.

  “If I asked, would you go?” He traced the pattern in my comforter, his eyes avoiding mine. He seemed nervous.

  “Are you asking me?” I put my pen in my book to hold the place where I was writing.

  “Are we doing that answer a question with a question thing?”

  “Or are you avoiding my question?” He shook his head at my joke.

  “I’d like to take you to your prom. Selah said it’s in two weeks. I think it’s the same night as my prom. We could go to either one or both if you want.” He wasn’t looking at me, and my mouth was opened wide in disbelief. I couldn’t believe he really was asking me.

  “As a date?” I asked before I could turn on my filter. He continued avoiding my eyes.

  “Um, I was hoping so, but we can just go as friends if you’d feel better.” He looked back at me, his expression fallen a little.

  “I’m not sure; I can’t even afford a dress.” I pulled my knees up to my chest, a little more embarrassed.

  “It was just an idea. It could be fun. You only get one junior prom.” He finally looked up at me, his eyes hopeful. I wanted to please him. He was a new friend that I was beginning to treasure. He made me laugh, and I felt happy when we hung like we were doing right then. There was something special about him, and I could almost see myself falling for him. But if I were being honest, I wanted to share special moments like that with my angel, the boy who was in my imagination and my dreams. It would be wrong to go with Ben and wish I was going with someone else, whether or not he really did exist. Or, did I need to actually go out and have a life and not wait for something that was a possibility when I had something that was a guarantee?

  “Think about it.” He went back to flipping pages, and I re-read the poem I was constructing.

  A few days later, when I arrived home, there was a big white box with a large red ribbon on it sitting in front of my apartment door. The envelope said

  To:Ellie

  From: Your fairy godfather,

  (But not in a creepy way)

  I took it inside to open it. There was a silver spaghetti-strapped silk dress, which happened to be in my size. It was so beautiful. I opened the envelope on top and read the note.

  I took it upon myself to make sure you have the hottest dress at prom. I hope you like it. I will pick you up at seven.

  Can’t wait,

  Ben.

  I tried it on, and it fit perfectly. I spun in front of my mirror as the skirt swirled around me. I still needed shoes, but I could make this work, I thought to myself. I called and thanked him. He said it was nothing, but he was just happy that I liked it.

  My hair was done in an updo, and my short nails were painted a soft shimmery pink color that matched my toes. I had borrowed a pair of strappy heels from Moriah. I looked at myself in my mirror, not believing the eyes looking back at me were actually mine. I looked grown up; I looked a little sexy, too. Selah went with Todd, I went with Ben, and Gideon and Moriah went together. A limo picked us up in front of the apartment. Then we went to my first dance. The dance was at the oldest hotel in our city. It had high ceilings, crystal chandeliers, and old, framed, tall windows that showed the busy main street. As the sun set, the walls changed from a soft yellow color to a golden hue. Ben was very charming. A lot of the girls from my school whispered and smiled at him as we passed. He laughed and flirted a little with them. I knew he was eating it up. I laughed, too.

  “It doesn’t make you jealous? That he’s flirting with those girls over there?” Selah asked, as she pointed at him standing by the punch bowl touching a girl’s hair and whispering in her ear.

  “We’re not together; I hope he gets her number,” I laughed.

  “Still, he’s your date. If he was my date, I wouldn’t leave his side.” I looked at Selah and raised my eyebrows.

  “No! You know what I mean. Where’s Todd?” He looked over at us at the mention of his name. I looked back at Selah. “See, right by my side.” I laughed again, as I looked back over at Ben, still engrossed in his conversation.

  “Um, Ellie?” I turned to see Todd’s friend Bobby standing beside my chair. I smiled at him. He seemed really shy, which took me by surprise because he was usually very confident. “Would you like to dance?” He shifted from foot to foot.

  “Yeah, that would be nice.” I stood, and he took my hand. Selah and Todd whispered conspiratorially. He led me to the dance floor. The song ended and a slow song began. He put his hands on my hips and smiled at me. He was a cute boy with dirty blond hair that hung in his blue eyes. He had a strong broad smile.

  “I didn’t think you did dances, or I would have asked you,” he leaned into my ear and whispered.

  “I came with my friend; he seemed to think prom is a rite of passage that you shouldn’t miss.” I stared at his lapel.

  “I bet he did,” he said under his breath, so softly that I almost didn’t hear it. I looked over to where Ben stood with the girls he was talking to, but they were gone, and he stood there alone, eyes glued to me. I looked away, suddenly feeling guilty. We were just friends. Yes, he invited me. Yes, he said he hoped we’d go as a date, but he said he was fine with us going as friends. Yet there he was, staring at me like I’d just sucker-punched him in the stomach. I looked back up into Bobby’s eyes. He was watching my expression. Then he nodded, “I get it. You were a nice dream, Ellie Solomon.” He held me tightly against him. “But I can’t compete with that.” I opened my mouth to say something but nothing came out. Ben tapped him on his shoulder.

  “Can I cut in?” he asked politely. I closed my mouth.

  “What took you so long?” Bobby asked as he let go of me and walked away. Ben took my hand in his and put his other hand at my waist. We didn’t say anything for what felt like an eternity.

  “Did you get her number?” I asked, staring at the flowers in his lapel.

  “Na, not my type.”

  “What is your type?” I asked. I felt his eyes on me.

  “You. Could be my type.” I looked up at him, his eyes burning a hole through me. I felt myself go weak suddenly, almost collapsing in his arms. He held me up, tight against him. “Are you all right?”

  “I need some air,” I barely whispered. He stopped dancing and walked me out with his arm tight around my waist. I leaned into his shoulder and felt safe. We walked out onto a terrace that led to a courtyard enclosed by hotel walls. He walked me to a stone bench near the center of it; we sat down, our knees turned into each other. He cupped my hands in his.

  “I think you could be good for me.” His eyes burned me still. I looked away. It was dark now except for the twinkle lights strung across the length of the courtyard. It was dark, but I could have sworn I saw a shadow move behind a tree a few feet from us. I looked back at him. He was real; he was cute. No, he was beautiful. And he wanted me, in real life. I could almost feel myself falling for him. Almost. “I think I could be good for you,” he added.