Beneath The Texas Sky

by Jodi Thomas

  Josh nodded a greeting and watched Cain’s reaction as he placed his arm around Bethanie’s shoulder. The older man stiffened, not like a jealous lover but more like an alert watchdog.

  Josh walked Bethanie back to her horse and said he would be along later. She seemed reluctant to leave him, but she said nothing in front of Cain. Josh knew he had some heavy thinking, and maybe drinking, to do before he headed home. The way he felt about her hadn’t changed in three years, and he knew what would have happened if Cain hadn’t interrupted. By the look in her eyes, she knew, too, and that fact frightened Josh more than anything had in his life.

  Bethanie lay awake most of the night thinking and listening for Josh, but he didn’t come home. She tried to act as if nothing were wrong all the next day, but even Rachel could read her clearly enough to know something was amiss. They cleaned house all day. The work used up Bethanie’s energy and allowed little time to think. By nightfall, Bethanie was too tired to wonder why Josh hadn’t come home.

  Just after she went to bed, she heard voices in the hall. Bethanie ran to the landing to see Cain holding Josh against the wall as Josh yelled obscenities at him in a drunken slur.

  Bethanie ran down the stairs. “Cain,” she shouted. “Don’t hurt him.”

  “Hurt me, hell,” Josh yelled. “I’ll…”

  Josh’s words were stopped by Cain’s fist at his jaw. She heard the pop of the older man’s knuckles and the snap of Josh’s lower jaw. Bethanie watched in horror as Josh slid unconscious to the floor like a huge rag doll.

  Cain looked up with no hint of anger in his face. “Sorry, Mrs. Weston, but my hand slips when I hear that kind of language in front of ladies.”

  Bethanie had to smile. Cain was a poor liar. He wasn’t sorry and his hand hadn’t slipped. “Can you get him upstairs to his room? He can sleep it off, and we can explain the accident tomorrow over black coffee?”

  She followed as Cain slung Josh over one shoulder and took the stairs two at a time.

  He stopped her at Josh’s bedroom door. “I’ll see he gets to bed.” Cain didn’t wait for an answer, but closed the door in her face.

  Bethanie spent another restless night tormented by the knowledge that Josh was only a wall away from her. She recalled the words he’d said to her when he first saw her at the stream. He’d said he hated her, yet love was in his eyes. Even as she’d held him to comfort his sorrow, her body had warmed at the feel of his muscular shoulders and the touch of his hands on her back. Had Josh felt the desire and also the guilt of needing her, even as they grieved his brother? Maybe that was why he had to be drunk to come back home.

  Dawn filtered into her room, and finally Bethanie heard movement in the hall. She climbed from her bed as her doorknob twisted soundlessly. She waited, thankful for the bolt blocking the door. The footsteps retreated back down the hall. She shook herself awake. She was overreacting. It was probably only Rachel checking to see if she was still asleep. Or was it Josh? Or was Cain on guard just outside the door?

  Bethanie dressed quickly and went downstairs. Rachel was already hard at work in the kitchen. Two dirty plates cluttered the table. “Mornin’,” Rachel smiled. “You’re the last one up. Cain and Josh have already downed a pot of coffee and gone off to look at the herd over on the north pasture.”

  “Cain and Josh?” Bethanie accepted the offered coffee.

  “Sure,” Rachel laughed. “Once that young man sobered up, they were thick as thieves. Mr. Weston is a gentleman, even if he did belt one on last night. He came down this morning and apologized to me right off.”

  Bethanie cleared away the men’s plates and sat down with her coffee. Rachel poured herself a cup and took the chair beside Bethanie. “They said not to expect them back until mid-afternoon. What part of the house should we tackle today?”

  Bethanie had lost all interest in housekeeping. She drank her coffee and nodded at Rachel’s chatter. Her bleak mood continued all morning while they worked. The weather seemed to mimic her emotions as clouds gathered and threatened rain.

  By four, Bethanie could stand the house no longer and saddled Twilight. The clouds were now dark, and thunder echoed off the surrounding mountains. Mariah was busy helping Rachel make long curls from apple peelings. Bethanie promised a mothering Rachel that she would go only a short distance from the house. With her first taste of freedom all day, Bethanie kicked her horse into a gallop toward the north.

  The woods were unfamiliar, and the wind whipped Bethanie around. Even the joy of riding was lost in her dark mood and the brooding weather. Why was Josh avoiding her? Maybe she had only brought him pain. Then, the sight of the doorknob turning flashed in her mind. Did he think he could come without knocking to her bedroom? She felt angry at him for thinking he could just take up where he left off, and angry at herself for knowing she would not only allow his advances, but welcome them.

  Large drops of rain stung her face. She had ridden farther from the house than she’d planned. In a race to beat nature, Bethanie kicked Twilight into a run toward the barn. The storm opened forth a blinding rain as thunder crackled in victory. She gave her powerful animal his head and leaned low over him. If she hadn’t been lost in her thoughts, she would have never been caught so unaware of the sky.

  As Twilight galloped into the open barn door, Bethanie allowed her cramped hands to let go of the reins. She leaned forward and patted the strong neck in a “thank you” to the animal for bringing her to safety.

  Suddenly, powerful hands encircled her waist and pulled her off the horse with a jerk. She whirled to see Josh’s face twisted in anger. “What kind of fool are you to be out in this?” he yelled above the thunder. The rain hammered against the roof like a thousand workmen. Shadows darkened the barn as clouds blocked the setting sun outside. Nature’s storm was reflected in Josh’s angry, dark eyes.

  Josh’s hands were still tight around her waist as he pulled her closer. “When I got back and discovered you were out in this storm I thought I’d go mad.”

  “I can take care of myself.” Bethanie resented being thought of as incompetent.

  “Don’t ever do that again.” Josh moved his hands to her shoulders. Though his words were hateful, his fingers were a caress.

  “I’ll do what I please, Josh Weston.” Bethanie’s anger at herself for being caught in the storm transferred to Josh.

  “When did you get so sharp, woman?’ Josh’s words were a slap.

  “About the same time you became a drunk,” Bethanie answered, and saw her words had stung him also.

  She pulled free, knocking herself off balance. Josh lunged to steady her, and they both fell backward against an empty stall. Josh swore and Bethanie screamed as the wood cracked, giving way beneath their weight. She fell against the packed earth, and Josh tumbled atop her. For a moment they lay face to face, staring at each other. Bethanie could feel his hard body covering her, their wet clothes doing little to hamper her sense of touch. His shoulders were wider, more muscular than she remembered. His dark hair was damp, covering his forehead.

  In a flash of lightning, Bethanie could see it all in his eyes. She saw the need he had for her even though anger still clouded his smoldering gaze. As his chest pressed against her breasts, she could see the desire in his eyes. The longing, not for a night, but for a lifetime.

  The instant shattered. Josh rolled violently off her as mighty arms jerked him to his feet. In a blink, Cain’s hand reached to help Bethanie up. “I heard the crash. Are you all right, Mrs. Weston?” Cain glanced in rage toward Josh, and she watched his hands ball into fists.

  Bethanie steadied herself. “I’m fine, Cain. It was just an accident.” She looked over at Josh. The raw passion in his dark eyes embarrassed her. Were her feelings toward him as obvious? “I must get out of these wet clothes.” Fire rose in her cheeks as Josh’s eyebrows lifted slightly.

  Bethanie turned and ran for the house. She thought she heard Josh start to follow, then stop. In that second on the barn floor, she had see
n the promise in Josh’s eyes. She could bolt her door tonight, but could she close her heart to him?

  Josh took two steps to follow Bethanie before a mighty hand grabbed his shoulder. Rage flowed through him like water through a broken dam. He swung around blindly at the huge man behind him and plowed his fist into Cain’s middle. Cain stumbled back a few feet in shock, then stood ready to fight.

  “I’ve had enough of your interfering,” Josh said as he swung and missed Cain’s jaw by an inch. “You act as if I could do her harm. I don’t know what you think gives you the right to protect Bethanie against me. I’ll have no more of it.” He swung again and heard a grunt as muscles bruised knuckles.

  “You’re a good man, Cain, but unless you’re Bethanie’s father, stay out of her life. I love that woman. She’s mine. No man is ever going to come between her and me again while I’m alive.”

  Josh struck again, but not as hard. He realized that Cain was not fighting, only blocking blows. As his fist turned Cain’s jaw, the man dropped suddenly to his knees making no defense to block another blow. Josh stopped his blow in mid-flight and knelt beside the strong man. Cain’s head rested on his chest in total defeat, not by Josh’s blows, but by his words.

  “Cain?” Josh put his arm on the man’s shoulder. “What is it?” Could it be that Cain loved her, too? Josh could not hate the man for that flaw. He had felt the pain of loving her and not being able to have her.

  Cain raised his deformed face to Josh. Tears fought their way down his scarred flesh.

  “I’ll have the truth, Cain.”

  The older man nodded as if he could no longer hold his lie within himself. He tried to speak but a sob tore the words from him. Finally his voice won over a low cry of pain. “I am her father,” he whispered. “Though I have no right to see her again, I’d give my life for her. I’m her father.”

  Chapter Nineteen

  Bethanie arranged the oak table in the large dining room for dinner. The house must have been beautifully stocked before vandals broke in and stole many of its treasures. All the linens and china seemed to be present, but most of the silverware had vanished. She searched every cabinet for candlesticks nice enough for the grand table. Finally she had to settle for an overturned china bowl as a base for three fat candles.

  Each time she passed the wide bay window, Bethanie paused a moment. There was a magnificent view of the storm rolling over the mountains, but it was the barn that drew her constant attention. Josh and Cain had been in there for hours. Were they fighting, or merely waiting out the storm? The pounding of the rain against the house echoed the throbbing at her temple. She had so much to talk over with Josh. How would he react when he learned half of the mine was hers? His eyes had told her he still loved her, yet he had said nothing. Would he always see his brother’s widow when he looked at her? Bethanie had known the minute she touched him that her passion for Josh was the same as it had been three years before. Even his angry words in the barn seemed to tell her he still cared.

  As the rain slowed and dusk blanketed the mountains in velvet, Bethanie heard Josh and Cain return. She paused outside the kitchen door, listening to the two men.

  “I still think you should say something.” Josh’s voice sounded adamant.

  As Bethanie pushed the door open silently, she saw Cain run his hand over a worried brow. “Some questions are better left unanswered.”

  “As you wish,” Josh agreed, raising his head to observe Bethanie watching them. His gaze seemed to devour her with a long-denied thirst. Though his words were for Cain, his eyes never left her face. “Will you join us for dinner, Cain?’

  “No.” Cain backed away. “I’d like to eat in here with Miss Rachel, as usual.”

  Bethanie thought little of Josh’s invitation, since she’d seen Ben do the same with many ranch hands. Josh, like his brother, treated all men equally regardless of position. Whatever had been the thorn between Cain and him, it must have been solved in the barn, for they were friendly enough now.

  Josh offered his arm to Bethanie and they walked into the dining room. Dark eyes stared down at her as his free hand reached to cover her fingers. She felt his muscles tighten as her hand pressed into his damp shirt. He smiled as she shivered beneath the pressure of his touch. His pace slowed to a lingering walk. Could it be he wanted to savor this moment of nearness?

  Josh pulled out her chair as if they were dining at a fine restaurant. “I bought this house from a lucky gold miner who hated the winters up here. When he sold it to me, there were more chairs,” he smiled. “I seem to remember a housekeeper, too, but guess she got swept out with the broken furniture.”

  Bethanie liked the little game he was playing and decided to play along. “You might find her piled up with the broken wood behind the house. No doubt the candlesticks will be packed in her pockets.”

  “I guess so,” Josh sighed. “But to tell the truth, this place never looked better than it does tonight.”

  Even before she looked up, she knew he was staring at her and not the room. She felt her cheeks redden at his compliment. His fingers lifted and brushed her jawline, then returned to rest lightly on her shoulder. The passion smoldering in his dark brown eyes said more than any words ever could. With great willpower, he made himself move away and take his seat opposite her.

  Bethanie tried to bring up all the things that needed to be said between them, but, as always, words came awkwardly to her. Conversation seemed only background noise to the emotions she read in his eyes. He was caressing her with his gaze, brushing over every curve of her body, undressing her with his eyes even as she served dinner. She felt a fire burn from the core of her outward, blushing her skin with its warmth.

  As if knowing of her distress, Josh talked of his luck buying old gold mines when gold was running out and the silver being discovered. His low voice was an embrace, and she had trouble following what he was saying.

  As Josh talked, she watched his mouth move and wished she could touch her finger to his lips. The wonder of looking at him had not diminished in the past years. He was a handsome man, strong in body as well as character.

  Leaving their plates of food almost untouched, Josh carried their coffee over to the huge fireplace. He pulled two chairs close to the hearth. They sat talking of nothing while each drank in the nearness of the other. Her gaze became hypnotized by his strong tanned fingers holding the fragile china cup. She remembered how gently those fingers had touched her body, and how quickly they’d been covered with blood when he’d slammed his fist into a tree at the falls after he’d learned of her marriage to his brother.

  Bethanie heard Mariah cry out as they finished their coffee. She hurried up the stairs to her daughter. Mariah’s room was across the hall from Bethanie’s. It was large and airy with a small side room built for a maid or nanny. Rachel had claimed the space to be near the child even at night.

  With Mariah in her arms, Bethanie returned. She wanted to reassure herself that with the reality of Mariah, the dream with Josh wouldn’t vanish.

  Josh had pulled off his boots and stretched his long legs out in front of him. Tears came to his eyes as he watched Bethanie and Mariah coming toward him. He slowly stood and leaned his long frame against the doorway.

  “There must be no beauty anywhere else in this world,” Josh whispered. “For it’s surely all now within my vision.”

  Mariah looked up at Josh and joy filled her face. His resemblance to Ben seemed enough for her to welcome him openly. She moved into his arms willingly. For a few minutes, Josh didn’t know how to handle such a wiggly bundle. He sat back and cradled her to him.

  He stroked her black hair, the same coal color as his own. She lay her head against his chest, and after a few moments of nestling, fell asleep in his arms. Josh tucked her bare toes under the hem of her long gown and kissed her cheek. “She’s wonderful,” he said to himself.

  He cradled Mariah as if holding a great treasure. “I have to ask, Bethanie,” he whispered. “I’ve wondere
d all these years, is she mine?”

  Bethanie moved beside him. She placed her hand on his shoulder and leaned close. “Does it matter?’ she whispered, her lips brushing his ear.

  Josh cuddled the sleeping child closer. “No,” he answered. “It doesn’t matter at all.”

  Josh stood and carefully carried Mariah up the stairs. He tucked her in bed and kissed her forehead. Bethanie felt tears flood her eyes as she watched him. He would never know he was kissing his own daughter, but somehow she felt now she must keep her secret in honor of Ben’s memory. Bethanie smiled suddenly at life’s funny turns. First, she wouldn’t tell Ben the truth about Mariah and now she wouldn’t tell Josh. Somehow, if she told Josh, she would be taking something away from Ben. She moved next to Josh’s side and blew out the candle on the bedstand.

  They stood in the shadows beside the bed for a moment. She could hear his breathing in the darkness. Without speaking they moved nearer to each other as if magnets were pulling them together.

  Josh folded Bethanie gently against him. His fingers lifted her chin and turned her face toward him. “One thing does matter,” he whispered as his lips brushed her forehead. “Are you mine?”

  The dam of emotions Bethanie had held back, all the promises she’d made to herself about going slowly, vanished with his words. She returned his embrace as completely as if three years had never passed. She ran her fingers through his black hair and fought to keep from screaming out her joy.

  Josh’s lips found hers, and his kiss was as tender as the touch of first love. His hands roamed slowly over her back as if he feared he might frighten her away. She slid her arms around his neck and brushed the raven curls. Her lips blocked his moan as she pressed her breasts against his hard chest. There was a crying need between them. A need as vital as air to survive. A longing within each that only the other could fill.

  As if from miles away, they heard steps coming up the stairs. Bethanie spoke her thoughts. “Will you come to me tonight?” she whispered.