After the work out we hit the steam room and I know I can’t escape any longer, the questions are going to come my way and Pip knows me too well for me to brush her off with generic answers. She wants the truth, and she’ll get it.
“What now then Rosie?” she asks as soon as we sit down,
“What do you mean what now?” I know what she’s asking but I need to stall her while I think,
“Rosetta, I know you! Do you really think you can just move on from this? I mean you can’t really blame Jackson for Thailand, even though he should have told you straight away! But yesterday Rosie… he went to Sasha of his own accord, that’s not cool Ro”
“He fucked up Pip, but he stopped himself before he did anything really stupid and I have to take that into account. This is all new to him and we all know how he behaves when he gets scared!” I feel angry at Pip and protective of Jackson, even though I know she is right. He did go to Sasha, “I know what he did was wrong Pip, but I can’t throw us away. So we’re going to put it and her behind us and move forward, he won’t get any more chances”
“Ok Rosie, if you really think you can do that…but you know where I am” Pip is resigning herself to supporting me even though she doesn’t agree, I can hear it in her voice,
“Pip, I love him, and it means the world to me that you two get on so well, so please don’t let that change now. We all make mistakes” I am pleading; I don’t want the people I love to turn against Jackson. It was bad enough having them hate Michael, but my feelings for him were nothing like they are for Jackson, he’s like oxygen to me.
“Give me a couple of days Rosie. I am angry at him, really angry. Just give me a couple of days” I smile, I know Pip better than anyone and know that what she’s just said means that she wants to keep her friendship with Jackson too, we’ll all be ok.
After the gym I head back to my flat. Despite it being Jackson’s thirtieth today, he has work to do and I have some ideas for a new book that I want to get down while they’re fresh. I had planned to cook a nice meal and have a romantic evening in, but the thought of that now makes me really uncomfortable. I just don’t feel in the mood for romance but we have to celebrate in some way, so I call Rafe,
“Brother of mine, what are your plans this evening?” I ask, trying to sound as upbeat as possible,
“Nothing really Sis, we were just going to chill. Aren’t you and Jackson having a candlelit dinner or something? How is the birthday boy feeling anyway? Old git!”
“OI, Watch it Alvez!” I hear Matthew chastise Rafe in the background. He turns thirty in a couple of months and is a bit sensitive about it, Rafe laughs as I respond,
“He’s fine, he’s working. Look I was thinking we could all get together instead. Food, a few drinks, you could bring the Wii over?” I’m almost begging and I worry that Rafe can sense that I’m hiding something,
“Yeah, sounds good baby sis, what time?”
I feel relieved, “Seven Thirty-ish? I’ll ask Pip too”
“Great, see you later then” Rafe hangs up and I release the breath that I feel I’ve been holding for an hour. I’ve avoided a romantic evening in; I just hope Jackson doesn’t mind.
I decide to cook a big pot of chilli and rice, it’s always a winner and everyone can just help themselves. When I called Jackson to tell him about tonight’s change of plan he sounded as relieved as me that it wouldn’t just be the two of us. He asked if I’d told Rafe what had happened, obviously worried about a confrontation, I hadn’t of course but I told him that Pippa knew, he said he was aware of that already as she’d called him to tell him what a prick he’d been and wish him happy birthday. We both laughed and it definitely relieved some of the tension we’d both been feeling.
When Jackson walked into my flat at just after four, I didn’t even hear the door. I only realised that he was here when I turned around during my big Prince number, hairbrush microphone in hand to see him leaning on the doorframe of my bedroom watching me,
“Oh my god” I jumped out of my skin at the site of him “How long have you been there?”
“Since the chorus, I had no idea you could, erm, gyrate so well!” he laughs and I feel a little embarrassed,
“You know exactly how well I gyrate Mr James!” I throw my brush at him and he catches it laughing, I turn the music down and turn to look him in the eyes, “Happy Birthday”
“Thank you Rosie, can I have a kiss?” he seems sheepish, like he isn’t sure if I’ll say no, but I don’t. Instead I can’t wait to wrap my arms around his neck and start this process of moving on.
Jackson relaxes as I kiss him deeply and before long the hands resting firmly on my sides are pushed down over my backside, lifting the t-shirt that I’m wearing to reveal the black lace French knickers underneath. The feel of lace against my skin never fails to get Jackson going and his eagerness for me is evident as he holds me hard against him.
“I was so scared I’d lose you Rosie” he breathes into my neck between kisses,
“Shush Jackson, I’m here to stay” I don’t want to think about the past weekend ever again, I just want Jackson to do what he does so well.
In an instant he picks me up and I wrap my legs tight around his waist. I can feel his arousal as he presses against me increasing my own. He carries me to the bed, kissing me the entire time, not stopping even as he lays me down and comes to rest on top of me.
Jackson stops kissing me and stands to remove his jumper, I sit up eagerly and undo his chinos as he reaches to pull my underwear quickly down and off. I am hungry for him, I need him to erase the bad memories with great ones, and it can’t come soon enough for either of us.
There’s no time or need for foreplay, we need each other more than we ever have. Jackson climbs back onto the bed kneeling between my welcoming thighs and without hesitation he leans down to kiss me and pushes into me. He hasn't removed his trousers and I can feel the zip rubbing against my inner thighs, the sensation is strangely arousing as I open my legs wider to accommodate Jackson’s entry. It’s tight without any foreplay but delicious as he slowly makes his way inside inch by inch, sliding his hand down my left side and underneath to support my backside as he withdraws and pushes back again, a little easier this time and with each thrust the pace quickens and sensations increase.
“I love you Rosie” Jackson breaths into my ear as he buries his head into my neck while he plunges deep inside me and out again, I’m lost in the sensations pulsating through my body and the love that I feel for the man giving them to me,
“I love you, please Jackson quicker, harder” I am breathless, I need to feel his release inside me, I need to feel my own.
Jackson obliges and pushes himself up onto his arms, thrusting hard as I dig my fingers into the cheeks of his backside. I need him deeper and I try to pull him in as far as I can. The way he says my name through gritted teeth lets me know that he’s close and I nod my instruction for him to come when he needs to. I’m close and as he starts to pound harder into me I can’t stop the waves of pleasure rushing over me.
My legs stiffen and Jackson groans as I tighten around him and then he thrusts, hard and fast before stilling deep inside me and collapsing down on top of me. We both breathe deeply for a moment, enjoying the aftershocks of our orgasms before Jackson looks me in the eyes with a shy smile and kisses me deeply.
“You drive me crazy baby, in all the right and wrong ways!”
I giggle girlishly as he pushes up and out of me before heading to the bathroom, I call after him,
“I’m surprised you can still get it up at your age!” a shocked Jackson puts his head around the door and his face changes to a look that means business. He flushes the toilet and when he heads back into the bedroom I can see that he is becoming hard again, “Ah I can see you like a challenge Mr James?”
“You have no idea Miss Alvez”
When I wake to the sound of the doorbell I jump up in a panic, after Jackson decided he wanted to prove just how well he could st
ill get it up I must have dozed off. I hear Rafe singing happy birthday as I put the light on and quickly run into the bathroom. I realise that Jackson is already up and had left me to sleep, part of me is annoyed but the other part knows that he is aware how tired I have been and will have it all under control.
I pull my hair into a bun on top of my head and have the quickest shower in the history of the world before throwing on some jeans and a vest and heading out to greet my guests.
The evening is a blast. Pip greets Jackson with a tight hug when she arrives and I thank her for making the effort, she insists she only came so that she can yet again beat Rafe at bowling and immediately picks up the Wii control from the table.
As Jackson and I put out the food and watch our family having such a great time, we know we’ll be ok. We have something great, something that’s worth fighting for and we’re both too stubborn to lose it.
“Come on then James, Let’s see what you’re made of” I crick my neck and roll my shoulders as though I’m getting ready for a fight and take the controller from Rafe, “Boxing or Table Tennis?”
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
It’s been five weeks since Jackson’s birthday and things are great between us. We really have moved forward and I’ve surprised myself at how relaxed I’ve been. For the first time ever I can genuinely say that I do trust Jackson, I know he’s not going anywhere, we’ve been through too much.
Apart from when we’ve been working or at the gym we’ve been together and it’s been great. We were in love before but we didn’t know each other that well, I know now that Jackson has a guilty pleasure for McFly and he knows that I love to have my feet tickled. He’s learned that my toast has to be buttered and served hot and I know that he played rugby at school and could have played professionally, but chose writing instead.
We’ve spent hours talking about books, films and music; we’ve cooked together, shopped together and even been out clubbing together. Jackson took Rafe out for a beer and filled him in on everything with Sasha, he knew that I needed Rafe to know and be ok with it all so he took it upon himself to make that happen. Rafe wanted to kill him at first, but Jackson was wise enough to have Matthew on standby to calm him down.
After a few days, Rafe like Pippa before him, calmed down and realised that what Jackson and I had was worth holding on to and he and Jackson have been getting closer by the day, helped along by Matthew.
Jackson has some work to do in London for the next couple of days so he can’t join Rafe, Pip and I as we head up to Buxton. Rafe’s wedding is just a week away now and we’re travelling home to put the final touches together. Matthew also has work, so is going to travel up with Jackson. The two of them have become great friends recently so I feel more comfortable leaving Jackson knowing that Matthew is around.
He has lots of friends in London of course, but they’re all more familiar with the old single Jackson, so he hasn’t really seen much of any of them of late. I did feel a little guilty for that but Jackson insists that he doesn’t really have much in common with his old set anymore, all they want to do is go out, get wasted and take a different girl home each night.
We did bump into one of his friends in the supermarket a few weeks back, Andy I think his name was. He was probably the tallest man that I’ve ever met and given how tall Rafe, Matthew and Jackson are, that was quite a shock.
Andy, based on appearances seemed like the kind of guy I’d get along with. Before he spotted Jackson and came over to say hello I had noticed him, his impeccable dress sense and his perfectly coiffed hair as red as my own drew my attention to him. I love the geek chic look that he was completely owning, and his model good looks were certainly eye catching.
When he turned and spotted ‘Jacko’ and came over to shake his hand however, I changed my mind. Andy decided that I was best ignored until he felt that the time was right to ask if I was Jackson’s ‘bit of stuff’ and then proceeded to piss himself laughing when Jackson introduced me as his fiancée. Apparently Andy found it utterly hilarious that ‘Shagger’ James is settling down, and he had no qualms about expressing all of this with me standing right there. After meeting Andy, I have to say that I couldn’t be more pleased that Jackson is staying away from his old group of friends.
Matthew is exactly the kind of bloke that Jackson should be friends with, for a start they can both have a bitch about the crazy Alvez’s whenever they need to, but mostly they just have a lot in common. They both love sport and fitness, they like old pubs, good food and travelling, and they’re both really great blokes. I like that they spend time together, and that it’s not a third wheel situation when Rafe joins them, they’re just three guys having a laugh together.
Since we got back from Yorkshire after New Year, Jackson has been training with Matthew and quite often Rafe too, and I’ve really noticed the difference in his physique. Jackson has always had a great body but the training he’s been doing of late has really trimmed him down and defined him, it’s really sexy. Rafe joked that he’d have to stop sparring with Jackson if he continued getting hotter, but Jackson just laughed it off with a ‘what happens in the gym, stays in the gym’ comment.
I love that he accepts that Rafe is gay and is not threatened by practicing a martial art with him and having to be so close. Michael was scared that his own brother would fancy him; little did he know that not even his fiancée did.
Jackson and Matthew have come along to the station to say goodbye to us, I’m a little anxious to leave him after so long being so close, and I can tell that he feels the same when he hugs me tighter than he ever has and tells me that he can’t wait to get to Buxton. It’s bittersweet because he’ll be there in just three days, but it’s my birthday in two.
“I’ll see you in a few days then Mr Alvez-English” Rafe in grinning like a small child at Christmas as he addresses Matthew by his new double barrelled name. He’s changed it in advance of their wedding and Rafe’s will change to match after the ceremony,
“You will indeed, I can’t wait Rafe” Matthew takes Rafe’s face in his hands as he kisses his fiancé “I cannot wait!”
We say bye to Jackson and Matthew and the three of us take our seats on the train. Pip is giddy to be heading up to see Ben. They’ve been going strong for a couple of months now and she is the happiest that I’ve ever seen her. We wave our goodbyes as the train leaves the station and Rafe wastes no time pulling out a bottle of wine and three plastic cups from his bag,
“Classy Alvez, real classy!” I can’t help but laugh at my brother, always prepared.
Forty five minutes into the journey Pippa’s phone rings, it’s Ben. Rafe and I heckle her while she talks but both of us are really pleased to see her so settled. She tells Ben where we are and how long we have to go, and I can tell that if she could get out and push to make the train go faster, she would.
“So, how’s the lovely Ben?” Rafe asks as a smiling Pippa places her phone back down onto the table,
“Lovely” she grins her response and we all laugh,
“And how is he in the sack?” My brother never was one to mince his words,
“Rafael!” Pip answers, pretending to be shocked, “A lady never tells!”
“Good job you’re no lady then…spill!” I laugh at the banter between Pip and Rafe. It never fails to amuse me and I know Pip really can’t wait to disclose intimate details of her relationship,
“AMAZING! Seriously the best ever!” Pip has placed both hands on the table as though trying to stop herself from floating away and Rafe presses on,
“That’s not detail Philippa, come on…is he big? I bet he’s big!” Rafe has a glint in his eye, eager for a full description of Ben’s manhood,
“Perfect Rafe, beyond perfect. It’s like he was made to fill me completely!” she’s now leaning forward and looking my brother in the eyes, driving her point home,
“Jeez, he must be big then!” Rafe raises his eyebrows as Pippa and I burst into uproarious laughter.
Th
e rest of the journey is filled with stories about our men and the things they do to us in the sack. Rafe shares more information than a sister should know, but I return the favour when I tell him about Jackson going down on me at the back of the cinema and about the amazing sex that we had in the back stairwell up to Rafe’s flat this morning, to which my brother laughed that he didn’t know whether he should beat Jackson up or shake his hand!
These two are the only people in the world that I would share that information with and the feeling is mutual, I am just grateful for the empty train carriage.
Dad is waiting in the car park when we arrive at Buxton station; he steps out of the car to welcome us when he spots us leaving the station,
“My babies, you took so long” Dad hugs Rafe and I in turn before pulling Pip into a huge hug and joking about her being his favourite. When we get into the car the usual moaning starts and Rafe and I laugh at the familiarity of it.
“Your mother! She wants me to go to the shop and get all these things, she knows I’m not well” Dad is convinced that because he is sixty now, he’s on his way out. The truth is that he’s probably fitter than I am,
“You’re fine Papá, there’s nothing wrong with you” Rafe tries to convince Dad who just waves his hand to shut his son up, Rafe turns to Pip and I in the back seat and rolls his eyes,
“Rafael, what do you know? I’m an old man mijo! You should look after me now!”
I can’t help but giggle as I wrap my arms around the back of the driver’s seat to hold my Dad, “I’ll take care of you Daddy, te quiero Papá”
“I love you too mija; you should have sat in the front!” Dad slaps Rafael on the thigh and we all laugh. After a few moments of waiting for it, Pip doesn’t let us down,
“You know mijo means piss in Portuguese right?” And a resounding “Yes Pip!” echoes around the car before more laughter, it’s so great to be home.
Me & Mr Write (Mr Write Trilogy) Page 9