My mother-in-law-to-be wraps her arms around me and squeezes tightly. “I am so happy for you.”
She releases me and takes my left hand, bringing it closer to her face for a better look. “A cushion-cut diamond with a pavé halo. Gorgeous. You did good, my boy.”
“It’s the most beautiful ring in the world.” I love it.
“We’re thrilled you’re becoming part of our family,” Clarissa says.
“I’m happy too.”
This is what family is about. Happiness. Love. Affection. And I’m finally going to have that in my life for the first time.
“Congratulations. Have you chosen a date?” Sara asks.
“We’re looking at the Saturday before Christmas.” It’s the first Saturday following the required waiting period.
“That doesn’t give you long to plan a wedding. We need to go dress shopping as soon as possible. Even when you buy off the rack, alterations take time. There’s really no time to waste.”
“We can go tomorrow.” Clarissa turns and looks at me. “That is if you don’t mind shopping for your dress in Glasgow instead of Edinburgh.”
“Actually, Glasgow is preferable to Edinburgh.”
Hutch looks at me and we both know that it’s time. We have to tell them the rest.
“I have more news to share and unfortunately, it’s not as happy.”
“I’m sure it involves the Lochridges. Your bad news always does.”
Gus couldn’t be more right.
“Aye, and it does this time as well.”
“Let me guess. They aren’t pleased about your engagement?”
Oh, Clarissa. If only it were that simple.
“I’m sure they won’t be pleased, but they don’t yet know about our plans to marry. This is about Ava Rose.”
Clarissa’s eyes dart to her only granddaughter. “Is she all right?”
“She’s fine. This concerns her custody.”
“Her custody?” The muscles around Clarissa’s eyes tense, deepening the lines at the corners of her eyes. “What part of her custody could possibly be up for discussion?”
“Every part of it, I’m afraid.” Hutch clears his throat when his voice breaks on the final word. And my heart aches for him. This is something that he never wanted to tell his parents.
“My marriage to Mina was over long before she died. We hadn’t shared a bed in over a year when she got into the car accident.”
A soft gasp catches in Clarissa’s throat. “No, Max.”
Everyone goes silent around the table except Ava Rose. She frets and I get up, taking her out of her high chair. And as if she feels Hutch’s pain, she puts her arms out for him to take her.
“It was only natural for everyone to assume that I was Ava Rose’s biological father. And I let everybody believe she was mine because I couldn’t bear to add to their pain.”
Clarissa’s eyes glisten. “Oh, son. What a terrible burden that must have been for you to bear.”
“Blair knows everything, including who Ava Rose’s father is. She’s using that knowledge as leverage to blackmail me.”
“Blackmail you how?” Gus asks.
“She’s threatening to expose Ava Rose’s paternity if I don’t agree to marry her.”
“Marry her?” Clarissa laughs, but her laughter is clearly not induced by amusement. “I’m curious to hear how she believes you’ll become her husband when she’s already someone else’s wife.”
“She wants to divorce Doug and marry me.”
“That’s insane. She’s aff her heid.” Clarissa mutters a few more words but I’m not able to make out what they are.
“I’ve met with a family law solicitor in Glasgow. Alex Kincade. I thought it would be wiser to use someone outside of Edinburgh. Someone outside of Thomas’s reach.”
Gus nods. “He’s a wise choice. Kincade is the best in the business when it comes to family law.”
Hutch reaches for my hand beneath the table. “There’s more to Blair’s threats and blackmail.”
“Bloody hell, what else could there possibly be?”
Oh Clarissa. There’s so much more. And I hope that you don’t hate me after you find out about some of the decisions I’ve made.
“Blair has threatened to expose the circumstances under which Lou and I met if I don’t cut all ties with her.” Hutch rubs his thumb over the top of my hand. “I was very alone, and I had been for a long time before Mina died. We hadn’t been husband and wife in years. I was starving for companionship.”
Clarissa holds up her hand. “We’re all adults here and understand what that means. You don’t have to explain.”
“I do have to explain because the origins of my relationship with Lou are going to come to light. Things are going to become ugly with the Lochridges, and we need you to hear the truth from us.”
“We would never listen to anything the Lochridges have to say about you or Lou. The two of you are adults, and the circumstances under which you met are your business and yours alone. You don’t have to tell us a thing about it.”
Clarissa is giving us an out. I should be relieved and take the pass she’s offering. But I can’t. I’m going to be in this family for the rest of my life. I don’t want the past to hang over my head.
“The truth is going to be twisted until it suits Blair’s agenda. They’re going to try to make me look unfit to be Ava Rose’s stepmother.”
I feel like I need to take this back to the circumstances that led me to Inamorata. “My father and his wife cut me off financially and made me leave their home when I was twenty-one. I got a job at a pub working as a waitress but I could barely pay my bills. There was no way to pay for tuition with what I was earning.”
I feel so much shame as I prepare to confess the rest of it. “I took a job as an escort to pay for my two final semesters at uni. It sounds horrible, I know that it does, but I only agreed to go on dates. Dinner and drinks were it. No physical contact with clients.”
I stop and Hutch steps in to take over the story. “The agency was having a gala to introduce new escorts to clients. I met Lou at that party and became her first client. Her first and last. And we spent the next three months together, falling in love.”
Clarissa smiles. “Never be ashamed of the way you came together. Only be grateful.”
Many would take this opportunity to shame me for the choices I’ve made, but Clarissa Hutcheson does the opposite. She’s such an incredible woman. What a wonderful mother-in-law she is going to be.
“Blair has made a lot of threats but hasn’t acted on any of them. We expect that to change when she finds out that Lou and I have married. Hence the reason Mr. Kincade advised us to wed quietly without calling attention to ourselves.”
“Marriage isn’t a secret that’ll keep for long. There will be records. People talk,” Gus warns.
“We know our time will be limited, but Lou is going to need people who will testify about what kind of wife and stepmother she is. We need time for her to establish that before Blair starts spewing accusations.”
“I really want you to have a wedding, even if it’s small and secretive. Lou has never been a bride before and she deserves that. You can’t let that special day be taken away from her too.”
Clarissa is so thoughtful of my feelings.
Hutch turns to look at me. “You know I’ll give you any kind of wedding you want.”
“I love the idea of a small, secretive wedding.” It’s actually perfect. I don’t have anyone to invite except Rachel and Claud.
Sara pushes away from the table. “All women to the living room. Mum, grab your laptop. We have a wedding to plan and not a lot of time to do it.”
Sara cracks open Clarissa’s computer. “What kind of wedding do you have in mind?”
I’m not the girl who has a Pinterest board labeled wedding ideas. “I have no idea.”
We’ve only been engaged for a day. I’ve barely had time for the idea to absorb into my brain.
�
�You should choose the venue first. Obviously somewhere away from Edinburgh so word doesn’t get out.”
“I love castles.”
“My friend and I went to look at one a few years ago in Perthshire when she was getting married. She didn’t choose it because it only accommodated twenty-four people for a ceremony, but it was breathtaking. I think it could be perfect for you and Max.”
“Can you show me online?”
“Of course.”
We gather behind her and look at the gallery of photographs of the castle. “Oh, Sara. That is stunning. I love it.”
“You can book the entire castle and stay overnight.” Sara navigates through the gallery of bedroom photos. “Look at the laird’s room. Ideal for a wedding night, right?”
It’s so romantic. “It’s perfect.”
“It even has its own wee chapel where the ceremony can take place.”
“That’s where I want to be married.” There’s no doubt in my mind.
Shannon jolts and all of our attention turns to her. “I guess Pearl likes it too. She’s suddenly moving like crazy.”
“I want to feel.” Sara places her hand on top of Shannon’s stomach and smiles. “That’s one thing I miss about being pregnant. Feeling a baby move inside of you is the most extraordinary feeling there is.”
I wouldn’t know. I didn’t get that far.
“Do you want children?” Sara asks.
“I do. Very much.”
“Max has always said that he doesn’t want them. That’s why I was so surprised when Ava Rose came along. But I guess I know why now,” Sara says.
“When we met, he was adamant about not wanting children. But something happened several weeks ago and he changed his mind.”
All of Clarissa’s attention focuses on me. “It must have been a big something because he has sworn for years that he’d never have children.”
Do I tell them about my miscarriage or allow them to draw their own conclusions about Hutch’s change of heart?
I want to tell them. I have to tell. This is my new family, and I don’t want secrets between us.
“I had a miscarriage.”
Clarissa leans over and wraps her arms around me. “Oh, Lou. I had no idea. I’m so sorry.”
“Losing that baby changed the way Hutch felt about having children. He wants a family now.”
“My heart is happy to hear that Max has changed his mind about children, but I’m also heartbroken for both of you. Gus and I lost our first bairn in my third month. That was thirty-four years ago and I still remember how much we grieved for that child.”
“It’s been hard. Very hard. But there was a positive to come from our loss. I have to tell myself that when I think about it or I’ll start crying again.”
“It’s all right to cry for your angel baby whenever you need to.”
Hutch has been wonderful. And so understanding. But it’s nice to talk to another woman who has gone through this same tragedy.
A rainbow follows a storm, giving hope of what’s to come. And I look forward to discovering my rainbow and what awaits me at the end.
13
Maxwell Hutcheson
“You told my family about losing the baby?”
“They asked if we had discussed children. I couldn’t answer truthfully without telling them about the miscarriage. I hope you don’t mind.”
“I don’t mind. I’m glad they know.” Not telling them felt as though we were keeping a secret. And I’m so tired of secrets.
“Your mum was sad for us but also happy because you’ve changed your mind about wanting a family.”
“Aye, she didn’t miss the opportunity to corner me and put in her request for another grandchild sooner rather than later.” I almost think she’s afraid I’ll change my mind again.
Lou giggles. “What did you tell her?”
“That we practice making a baby every chance we get.”
Lou’s mouth opens wide. “Hutch! You didn’t.”
“No, I didn’t. But I would very much like to practice.”
“We’re in your parents’ house.”
She always says that.
I reach for Lou and pull her against me. “We’re consenting adults who are getting married in a month. I don’t think they’ll have an objection. And besides, Mum is the one who asked for a baby. She knows what has to be done to get one.”
“True.”
“You’re my fiancée. Almost my wife. It isn’t wrong for me to want you. And I do. I want you all the time.”
Lou sits on the bed and scoots backward, spreading her knees wide. “Then I suppose it isn’t wrong for you to have me.”
“No. And what my mouth is about to do to you isn’t wrong either.”
Lying on my stomach, my face is between her thighs. Pressing my nose against her slit, I take a moment to smell her before I taste. “There’s nothing in the world like your essence when you want to be fucked. I can smell your desire and how much you want it.”
I allow my breath to rush over her skin, and she squirms beneath me.
“You want my tongue, don’t you?”
“Yes, I want it. I always want it.”
“And I always want to give it to you.”
I’m dying to taste her. And when I do, she squirms her hips, grinding against my mouth, and her loud moan fills the room. Reaching up, I touch my fingertips to her lips to quieten her and she sucks my fingers into her mouth.
Fuck, it’s hot. She’s hot. My almost wife.
The moaning. The fast breathing. The movement of her hips. She isn’t going to last long like this. And it makes me happy that I’m able to make her orgasm so easily.
It isn’t long before she tenses and quivers. And then the sweet proof of her orgasm floods my mouth. Fuck, I love the way she tastes when she comes.
She relaxes and her eyes are closed when I crawl up her body, entering her in one smooth motion while she’s still savoring her post-orgasmic euphoria. I pull back and slide into her until I’m buried to the hilt again. And again.
“Ohhh.” Her voice is laced so heavily with breath that the single word is almost indistinguishable. But indistinguishable or not, I understand the meaning behind it.
“Hutch.” She grips my biceps and holds on when I thrust harder. “We’re doing it again without a backup method.”
Fuck, I don’t want to use a condom. It’ll ruin this for me. “I’ll pull out like last time.”
“We both know pulling out isn’t reliable.”
My head is warring with my cock. Moving inside of Lou feels so damn good and I’m close to coming. My cock doesn’t give a shite about reliable birth control right now. He isn’t the least bit concerned about the consequences of his actions.
“I don’t have a condom.” I bought some but I didn’t bring them with me. I didn’t know we were going to stay so late and end up spending the night here.
I move faster, bringing myself closer to orgasm. “I’ll stop if you want me to.” I say the words but I don’t really mean them.
“God no, don’t stop.”
Thank fuck.
“I’ll pull out before I come.”
I love coming inside of Lou, but I also don’t mind seeing my cum splattered across her body.
My jaw is clenched as I try to hold back and make this last for as long as possible, but I reach a point where getting off is beyond my control. “I’m almost there.”
Lou cups her hands around the sides of her breasts and pushes them together. “Come between my tits.”
What. The. Fuck?
Damn. Those words just did it for me.
I withdraw and she watches wide-eyed as jets of cum spurt between her tits.
We smile at each other when I’m finished and she giggles. “Well, that’s a first.”
It was a wee bit kinky. “What brought that on?”
“I don’t know. It seemed sexy and dirty, so I wanted to see what it would feel like.”
“Do you like it?�
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“I don’t know why but I do.”
I move off Lou and lie beside her, my eyes closed, reveling in the euphoria that always follows our lovemaking. I should probably be concerned about having sex without birth control but I’m not. I’m not the least bit worried about it.
If a baby happens, it happens. Our family will grow a wee bit sooner than expected.
I reach for her hand and bring it to my mouth for a kiss. “I love you, mo maise.”
She rolls from her back to her side, hitching her leg over me. Stretching her upper body across mine, we’re chest to chest. “I love you too, my hot Scot almost-husband.”
I stretch my neck and she does too, bringing our lips together to kiss.
“We need to have a serious conversation about sex and birth control. Initiating a discussion about it while we’re in the middle of doing it isn’t working.”
That’s probably a good idea since I lose all capacity to make sensible decisions when I’m inside of her. “Then let’s talk about it.”
“We were told to use a backup method during my first month on the ring and we haven’t, not even once.”
“That is very accurate.”
“I could already be pregnant.”
“I’m aware.”
“We’re playing a game of roulette every time we have sex, and a baby is at stake. Is that a gamble we want to continue to take or do we need to be intentional about preventing a pregnancy?”
Fate is what brought us together—twice. I think it did a good job. “I’m okay with leaving it up to fate. If a baby happens, it happens and was meant to be.”
Lou cups her hand around the side of my face. “I can’t believe what a different man you are from the one I met at the beginning of summer.”
“I’m a different man because of you.”
Lou has triggered something in me that I thought I’d never feel. All I can think about is making her mine and growing our family. “Being with you has changed everything for me. I want you to be my best friend, my wife, the mother of my children. I want you to be my number one in all things.”
“I swear that I will love you beyond the final beat of my heart. And I will never hurt you.”
I pull Lou close and place a kiss on the crown of her head. “I know.”
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