by Mary Clay
"Mom did me in," he said. "Woody was just gathering information until he heard Mom call Abby a worthless bitch when she was talking to Penny Sue." Kevin sighed. "Mom has never gotten over the fact that Abby walked out on me and stole my research. She wanted me to sue Abby. Actually, Mom wanted to have her roughed up, but I nixed that, and Mom gave in because she really liked Abby's mother."
I filed Kevin's last comment re: roughed up in my memory bank under, don't mess with Alice!
"What did Woody say?" Penny Sue asked Kevin.
"You know. 'Why did my mother say that?' which led to the fact that Abby and I used to live together. I think you know the rest."
"Surely they don't suspect you had anything to do with her death. You left the library with us," Penny Sue said.
"When Woody started, I thought it was a perfunctory interview. But when he honed in on Mom's bitch comment, it seemed I was suddenly a suspect." He gazed at us with dull eyes. "Abby walked out on me, and I was heartbroken, but I sure didn't want to kill her!"
"Of course not." Penny Sue patted his hand. "We don't even know if Abby's death was foul play. If it was, the dead man probably did it. Or," her eyes flashed, wheels in her head turning, "Abby killed the weird man and had a heart attack after she realized what she'd done." Penny Sue snagged a chip. "That's it! The weirdo hid out in the library and attacked Abby. She knew karate or something and killed him in the struggle. Then she had a heart attack when she realized what she'd done." Penny Sue took a bite of the chip and munched it slowly. "Yep, Abby killed the magazine guy, then died from guilt. The snake was an innocent bystander. By the way, your mother is coming down tomorrow."
"What?!" Kevin nearly fell off his stool.
Penny Sue took another chip and grinned weakly. "Your mother didn't like what she overheard from Woody. She's going to see Abby's mother this morning, then leave immediately. She should be here tomorrow evening."
"You're kidding," Kevin exclaimed.
"No. She's going to stay with you at my place, and I'll stay over here."
Kevin cradled his head in his hands. "This is going to be a disaster. She'll threaten everyone in law enforcement with her mafia contacts and before you know it, I'll be in jail. And, if that doesn't happen, I'll have to spend days playing gin rummy."
"I love gin rummy," Guthrie gushed. "I'll keep your mother company and off your back."
Kevin regarded Guthrie as if manna had fallen from heaven. "Do you really like to play cards?"
"Love it. Timothy and I used to play all of the time."
"My mother is difficult."
"No one could be worse than my Aunt Harriet, and she might be tolerable if she could play cards."
Kevin regarded Guthrie skeptically. "Are you sure?"
"Well, I can't entertain her 24 hours a day, but I'll help you out between my Lemon Aid business calls and volunteering at the library."
Kevin's eyes softened. "Thanks, Guthrie. I believe my mother would like you."
"Does she drink scotch?" Guthrie asked.
Kevin nodded. "You'll be two peas in a pod."
Penny Sue raised her hands and face to the ceiling. "See, Ruthie, it's just like you said--'the Universe provides.' Who would have guessed? Two people who love rummy and scotch."
Ruthie rolled her eyes. "If it will help, I'll run to the store and buy a case."
"I'll go with you if you're paying. I think we need to stock up on wine, too." Penny Sue flashed a mischievous grin. "But first, we need to move my stuff over here."
While Guthrie and Kevin morbidly sucked down alcohol, Penny Sue, Ruthie and I went next door to pack up Penny Sue's clothes and prepare for Aunt Alice's arrival. Ruthie and I changed the sheets and cleaned the master bathroom. Penny Sue packed up clothes and necessities. Close to an hour later, Ruthie and I had finished straightening the condo and headed for the front door. There were two large Hartman suitcases with hanging clothes draped over them and a huge woven basket of pill bottles.
"What in the world is that?" I asked, pointing at the pill basket.
"My amino-acids and vitamins," Penny Sue said airily.
She'd told us that she was on a health kick, making a complete change in her life. I guess the change didn't include alcohol. Still I didn't know about the supplements. "What are they for?"
"My personal trainer in Atlanta recommended that I read a book about neurotransmitters. She thinks mine are off."
Yes, Lord!
"The book says that certain amino-acids and vitamins will restore a person's brain."
Heavens, yes. You need them all!
Ruthie pointed at the basket. "Do you take all of those pills?"
"Not all of them, now. Actually, there were two books. The first book recommended one batch and the second recommended others. I think the second batch is better for me, so I only take about half of the bottles there."
I reached down and picked one up. "What's this for?"
"That's good for ADD, memory, sex drive, and stress."
I was stunned. That Penny Sue could recite that list of ailments was a testament to the supplement's benefit to memory. I also noticed that it was on the top of the pile, indicating that she recognized she had all of the problems, except a lack of sex drive. Of course, she wouldn't admit to sex problems if there were any. She hadn't dated anyone since she'd been in New Smyrna Beach, but neither had I! My memory wasn't so good, either. Geez, maybe I needed some of that stuff. "Where did you buy all of this? Is it expensive?" I asked.
"Not really. There's a place on the Internet that sells them for half price."
"Remind me to get the web address."
We all exchanged nervous glances when the car horn blared. Penny Sue swallowed hard and started for the front door, the rest of us followed. She paused for a deep breath and swung the door wide. One glance at the big blue Caddy--sand billowing from a quick stop--told me we were in for trouble. Aunt Alice must have really hauled it down I-95, it was only 6:30 p.m. Apparently Kevin's mother shared some of Penny Sue's driving skills as well as personality traits.
Penny Sue forced her lips into a tight smile and offered a hand to the curly, gray-haired woman who already had a foot on the ground.
Aunt Alice waved Penny Sue aside. "I'm fine," she insisted. "I may be old, but I'm not crippled." Only about five-foot-four and slightly stooped, Alice projected the aura of a pro basketball player. Her polo shirt and neatly creased slacks looked as fresh as when she donned them for the long drive.
Kevin pulled his mother into a bear hug. "Mom, you didn't have to come down. I'm fine."
She patted his stomach. "I can see that. You've put on weight."
"Penny Sue and her friends are terrific hosts." Kevin quickly made introductions, his attention lingering on Ruthie.
Not to be slighted, Guthrie rushed to Alice and shook her hand. "Man, I couldn't wait for you to get here. Alice is one of my favorite names! I think it's a sign. Did you ever see the movie Alice's Restaurant? Man, that Alice was--" I gave his forearm a good squeeze. Guthrie cut his eyes at me, grinned sheepishly, and turned back to Alice. "Anyway, I hear you like scotch and playing gin rummy. They're, like, my favorites, and I've been looking for a buddy since my partner, Timothy, was transferred to Houston. He didn't drink, but he loved to play rummy."
Aunt Alice hauled back and gave Guthrie the once over. Apparently concluding he was a ditz and not dangerous, she started to laugh. "Are you always so hyper?"
Guthrie gave her a silly grin. "Sorry, I ramble when I'm nervous. If I talk too much, tell me, I won't be offended. It's just that I've really been looking forward to hanging out with you. I've been terribly lonely since Timothy left. Congress is a real pisser, you know, canceling the shuttle program and forcing Timothy to move to Houston. He's a brilliant fuels engineer. Now our astronauts have to hitch a ride with the Russians to get to the International Space Station that our country mostly built. Does that make sense to you? We build something that we can't get to. And you know the Russians will c
harge top dollar for a ride. It's all a real stupid bummer--"
I squeezed Guthrie's shoulder.
"I'm rambling again, huh? Sorry, Alice. Can I call you Alice? My real name's Fred Fribble, but everyone calls me Guthrie. And don't worry--if anything comes up I can protect you. I have a Glock and I know how to use it. I protected the ladies here during the hurricanes."
Penny Sue gave him the squinty-eye. "His major contribution was eating all of the chocolate," she whispered to Ruthie and me.
Aunt Alice patted Guthrie's arm. "Son, you've got to calm down or you'll have a heart attack. Please call me Alice, and I'll call you Guthrie, okay?" She turned to Kevin. "Where's the loo? It was a long drive."
While Aunt Alice freshened up, Kevin and Guthrie carted her luggage to Penny Sue's master suite. Penny Sue had made a point of clearing out several drawers in her bureau for Alice, particularly the drawer with underwear.
As Alice unpacked, Penny Sue made a pot of Starbucks Special and set a plate of cookies on the coffee table in the living room. Kevin had pulled over the high backed rattan chair for his mother, and the rest of us sat on the sofa and loveseat, eyeing the cookies and wondering what had come over Penny Sue.
"Can I help you?" I asked, noticing the perspiration beading on Penny Sue's forehead.
"Yes. Would you please take this to the coffee table?" Penny Sue waved at a tray of cream, sugar, cups with saucers, and cloth napkins. Cups with saucers? Not our usual mugs? Cloth napkins? Boy, she was really putting on the dog for Alice. I squinted at the napkins that looked familiar. They were my napkins!
I sidled up to Penny Sue and whispered, "Don't be nervous, Alice seems nice. What's with the cloth napkins?"
"I found them in the utility room."
"Oh, yeah, I guess I forgot them when I moved next door. That was the only complete set of anything I got from my divorce, if you don't count the matching table cloth that Zack took."
As I said before, my sleazy ex works for Judge Daddy's law firm. The Judge always liked me and strongly advised Zack to be fair with the divorce settlement--split everything fifty-fifty--which the jerk did. He took half of everything. Half of the pictures off the wall; half of each set of china and crystal; all of the top sheets, no bottoms; one twin bed from Zack, Jr.'s room. He probably would have chain-sawed Ann's double bed in half if he had a chain saw and it wouldn't make him break a sweat. Considering Zack was responsible for the divorce in the first place by running around with a strip club dancer, to call him slimy was being kind. He'd also pilfered our life savings that he stashed in off-shore bank accounts. If not for Judge Parker's intervention, I'd be living in a homeless shelter or tent instead of next door to Penny Sue at the beach.
"Alice really has you rattled, doesn't she?" I whispered.
Penny Sue clenched her jaw. "Momma's not here, so I'm the recipient of all of Alice's anger about the way the family treated her. Alice was raised Southern, so she knows how things should be done. With the big deal her parents made about her Yankee husband, I know she's going to point out any faux pas I make."
"I think you're wrong, she doesn't strike me that way at all."
"You don't know her," Penny Sue said squinty-eyed. "Momma told me."
"Penny Sue, that was years ago. The feud was between Alice and her parents, not you. She went on to become a high government official. I'm sure she doesn't give the olden days in Georgia a single thought."
Penny Sue handed me the tray. "Yeah, she had to worry about the Mafia."
"Come on, Kevin's a great guy who loves you. Y'all get along fabulously."
"Sure, he takes after his father."
I had just arranged the cups, saucers and napkins on the table when Alice came in from the bedroom.
"Mom, take this chair," Kevin said, ushering her to the rattan chair that resembled a throne.
"Coffee, anyone?" Penny Sue appeared with the Mr. Coffee pot. "It's Starbucks Special!" That was added to blunt the genteel slight of a Mr. Coffee instead of a silver serving pot.
Alice glanced at the cookies, and then at Guthrie who was wide-eyed, as surprised as we all were by the formality. "I'd really prefer a scotch, if you have it," Alice said.
Guthrie raised his hand. "I'd like one too, please ma'am."
Penny Sue's face fell to her boobs. So much for her efforts at Southern hospitality. "Of course, there's scotch and wine."
Noticing Penny Sue's crestfallen expression, Kevin, Ruthie and I asked for coffee. Each of us also took a napkin and cookie.
Alice picked up a napkin. "I haven't seen lace napkins in twenty-five years. I thought they went the way of the abacus."
Penny Sue's jaw flexed. I jumped in to take the heat. "That was my idea. We wanted to pull out the best for our initial meeting since we're planning to have pizza delivered for dinner. We didn't want you to think we were beach bums. The napkins belonged to my grandmother."
Alice winked. "They're very pretty, but you don't have to put on airs for me. This is the beach."
Guthrie grinned like a Cheshire cat. "Man, I'm really glad you said that, because I don't have any cloth napkins. I use paper towels." He waved his arm. "Only Bounty, though, not the cheap stuff."
Penny Sue handed Alice and Guthrie their drinks. Alice took an appreciative sip. "No airs. I'm here to help Kevin."
I noticed that a stomach cramp seemed to hit Kevin at the comment. Fortunately, the phone rang. Penny Sue answered. "Aunt Alice, it's for you."
"It must be Myrna, Abby's mother, about the funeral arrangements." Alice took the phone, mouthed some pleasantries then listened for a long time. She hung up and turned to Kevin. "There's not going to be a funeral or memorial service anytime soon. Myrna and the authorities down here want an autopsy. But Myrna has a copy of Abby's will. She left all of her books and research notes to you, Kevin. Myrna has to clean out Abby's apartment and wants me to pack up the things at the timeshare Abby rented here at the beach. Myrna's going to ship all of Abby's books and notes down here to you. Myrna said she told the New Smyrna police to give you any of Abby's research they found."
Kevin hopped up, spilling his coffee. "To me? We broke up fifteen years ago! Why me?"
Alice blew out a long sigh. "I suppose Abby felt guilty about stealing your research."
Kevin sat down, dabbing at his trousers with the lace-trimmed napkin. "I can't believe this. I don't want the research. I've spent years trying to put the whole affair behind me."
Alice gave her son a stern look. "Well, Kevin, it's come back around. You'll just have to deal with it."
Chapter 5
Penny Sue and I were scheduled to work at the library the next day. This time, she wore slacks and a silk blouse with flat shoes. She also insisted on driving her Mercedes.
"I thought you didn't want to drive the Mercedes because of the transmission," I said.
"Yeah, that and I wanted to leave it for Kevin to use. Now that his mother's here, he can use her Caddy. Besides, I'd like your opinion on the transmission. You know how some repair shops are. They'll replace the whole engine when all you need is a fan belt, especially now with the economy so slow. I'll bet Mercedes sales are in the tank." She stopped at the intersection of our sand driveway and Highway A1A. "Listen for a clunk when I accelerate." She made a right turn and floored it. The engine whined, obviously straining, then came a jerk and grinding sound as the transmission shifted to a higher gear.
I glanced sidelong. "No question about it, your transmission needs work."
"Darn, I hoped it was my imagination. I can't afford to have it fixed right now."
"Just keep the car parked. Ruthie and I don't mind driving. Your Dad called last night. Did he have any news on your house?" I asked.
"He didn't admit to anything, but I think something's cooking. He's mailing a power of attorney down here for me to sign. He said it was merely a precaution in the event a deal materialized. That's all I could get out of him. He's trying to torture me, Leigh."
"He is not."
&nb
sp; "Yes he is. He wants to teach me a lesson, as if having to sell my house isn't lesson enough. He also wants to oversee my investments from now on. I'm not a child, and I won't agree to that." She thumped her chest. "I'm not the only person who lost money to Madoff. Most of our friends invested with him. Ruthie and Daddy are the only people I know who didn't jump on the bandwagon."
"I didn't."
"Well ... okay, you were smarter than I was."
"Or luckier. Zack handled our finances."
"Maybe it's a good thing he was distracted by the stripper. If he hadn't been so busy getting lap dances, he might have gotten caught up in the Madoff scheme. Ruthie says there are no accidents, and even the worst disasters can have a silver lining. Maybe that's yours. Did you ever think of that?"
I gave her a disgusted look as she parked at the library. "I promise, that thought never crossed my mind," I said as we headed toward the front door, passing a Volusia County deputy at the entrance.
"I guess they're still investigating," Penny Sue said.
"Yeah, that's probably a crime scene tech." I pointed to the aisle where Abby's body was discovered. A large area was roped off with yellow crime tape. A young woman in khaki slacks and a green polo shirt was examining the books on the floor and sorting them into boxes. Every now and then she stopped to take a picture. "I guess they're searching for evidence, like a weapon or Abby's blood."
Penny Sue shivered and glanced away. "It gives me the chills. I hope they let me work in the reference stacks or do something that's a long way from this part of the library."
"I'm sure Terry--" I caught sight of a man with a bad comb-over hairdo in the row next to the crime scene. He pulled out a book, fanned the pages, then peeked through the void to the other side. I elbowed Penny Sue. "Look, that's Dr. Willows!" As we watched, he replaced the book, glanced from side to side, and repeated the process, this time removing two or three volumes. "He's spying on the technician. You know, I believe the roped off area is the place where he and Abby had the disagreement before the debate."