A Silent Prayer

by Samreen Ahsan

“Excuse me.” I avert my eyes and take the phone from my bag. I have never been so elated to receive a call from Adam. “Hi,” I say. “It’s so good to hear your voice.” That’s certainly the truth.

  “Really?” He sounds pleased. “Then I’m glad I called. How is your training going?”

  “It’s good. I am enjoying it and learning a lot. It is an exceptional experience.” Murray’s gaze is still probing me through his thick-rimmed glasses. “How about you? How was your interview?”

  “It went well. Boring at the start though… you know, general business questions. They were interested in us also.”

  “Really? What did they ask?”

  “I will tell you when we meet. You had lunch?”

  “I am having it right now.” I put a forkful of salad in my mouth.

  “Please, carry on. I was wondering if we could hang out and see a movie tonight?”

  “That sounds interesting. I will call you when I’m free.” I smile over the phone.

  “Take care.” And he hangs up the phone.

  I put the phone back in my purse. “Sorry about that.”

  “Boyfriend?” He adjusts his glasses, interrogating me.

  “Yeah. How did you know?”

  “You were blushing like a rose. It was obvious.” I look out the window, to deflect his remarks, but his eyes are still on me. “You are very beautiful, Miss Ahmed. Has your boyfriend told you that?” I look back at him in shock.

  I adjust my scarf and look into the salad plate. “Yes, he keeps reminding me.”

  “Never lose an opportunity of seeing anything beautiful, for beauty is God’s handwriting.”5 His eyes bore into me as he speaks. What a sleaze. I look away.

  “Have you ever been to San Francisco?” He changes the subject quickly, which makes me look at him. I shake my head. “It’s a beautiful city, with amazing weather all year round. You should visit there. Be my guest.” He takes a bite from his plate.

  “Well, thank you, Mr. Murray. I will, hopefully.”

  “There is another summit in New York, around New Year’s. Do you have an invitation for that?” I look at him quizzically, wondering exactly where this is going. “You are a bright young woman. These kinds of summits and conferences will accelerate your career. May I have your email, so that I can send you an invite? I will send you two invitations; you can bring your department head or whoever is interested in coming.”

  “That is very kind of you, Mr. Murray. But I guess I already have an invitation for that. My boss has mentioned it, but in case it’s not the same one…” I take out a pen and write my email address on a paper napkin. “I would love to attend another summit like this. Thank you very much.” Now we are talking like professionals.

  “Have you ever thought about living in California?”

  “No. Why?”

  “I would like to offer you a job in my department. We take good care of our employees, Miss Ahmed. I saw your work today, and I must say I am very impressed. You are very skillful and technical, and your choice of colors and perception in digital publishing is unique. The two people you just met, I wanted them to meet you so we could discuss things further.” He takes a sip from his glass and continues. “Consider yourself very lucky, Miss Ahmed. This kind of career opportunity comes once in a lifetime.” I look at him in astonishment, with no idea how to react. Ethan Murray is offering me a job at Adobe®. It is certainly a big boost on my career path; I have never imagined working in Silicon Valley. People dream about this kind of job, that I am being offered with my soup and salad in a fancy restaurant.

  “I am surprised and delighted, Mr. Murray. I—”

  “Think about it. I’m not asking for an answer now. We can discuss it tomorrow, or perhaps over the phone one day next week.”

  “Sure, Mr. Murray. I feel very privileged to have an offer from you, but—”

  “I have good experience in digging out gems.” He pauses for a moment, then continues. “So… what does your boyfriend do?”

  “He is a businessman.”

  “That’s interesting. What kind of business?”

  “Umm… he builds… houses… communities and…” I’m not sure what else to add.

  “Rich man. What’s his name?” I don’t know if I am supposed to disclose his name or not, but since I have already said so much, there is no escape.

  “Adam Gibson.”

  “The man behind Gibson Enterprises?” He takes his glasses off and stares at me.

  “You know him?” I ask curiously.

  “Who doesn’t know the most eligible bachelor in Toronto? I am originally from there, by the way. Though it has been ten years since I moved to Silicon Valley, I keep track of my city’s news. He is the talk of the town every time he makes move.” He takes a sip and continues. “In fact, I read last week about his recent affair and…” He puts his glasses back on. “Are you the same girl who hit the news last week?” I nod in silence. The world seems so small right now. I want to hide somewhere, to avoid all the questions.

  “I must say he is a lucky man.”

  “I am lucky to have him.”

  After a minimal pause, he continues. “Please, let me know soon about your decision.”

  “Do you want my resume, Mr. Murray? Or any letters of recommendation?”

  He smiles for a moment and tilts his head to look at me from his gray eyes, his glasses resting on his nose. “Do you know personal beauty is a greater recommendation than any letter of reference? I don’t say it, Aristotle did.” He indulges himself pleasurably in his drink, while looking at me. What the hell is he talking about? “What are your plans for tonight? Are you coming skiing? Everyone is going.”

  “No, I have plans with Adam.”

  “He is here in Edmonton?”

  “Yes, Mr. Murray.”

  “I would like to meet him, then.” He smiles with a hint of sharpness in his eyes.

  “Sure.” I look down to check the time on my watch. “Thank you for the lunch, Mr. Murray, and for your offer. I will let you know soon. My training is starting in ten minutes, so I need to go…” I stand up and he joins me.

  “Bring your man for skiing tonight. It’s going to be fun.”

  “I am not sure, Mr. Murray. Let me ask him, and I will let you know. Thanks for the invitation, though. Good day.”

  “Take care.” He fixes his glasses and follows me.

  I don’t know why, but I feel like he is walking deliberately close to me. “Your fragrance is very charming, Miss Ahmed. I like floral perfumes on beautiful ladies. It is a great blend of feminism with flowers.” He speaks behind my ear. I feel a wave of danger in his message, so without looking back at him, I speed up to enter the main hallway. Our badges are checked again and we head in.

  Fortunately, our ways part and I feel myself breathing normally as I join the others at the training session. I still can’t believe my luck that I have been offered such a huge opportunity. Though I have not decided about it, I am dying to share my excitement with Adam. We all get involved in the hands-on training on the recent versions of Creative Suite®, which engrosses me so much that I don’t realize how much time has passed. After two hours, Mr. Murray peeks in with an announcement. “We are serving tea and coffee outside. Please, join us, everyone.”

  We all halt our work and head out, along with our trainer, Mr. Richard, who is a pure Californian in his early forties. Ethan Murray and Richard Godfrey are busy talking to each other, and some of my teammates join the conversation. I see some of the girls getting a little too close to Murray, responding to his magnetic charm and enigmatic looks, which seem to always draw a crowd. I distract myself with pouring myself some tea. As soon as I touch the milk pot, a masculine hand covers mine.

  “Allow me.” I look behind me to see Ethan Murray. His smile is charming, which makes me smile back at him. I release the mil
k pot and he adds the milk to my tea.

  “Thank you.” I pick up the sugar.

  “One tea for me, please,” he adds.

  Without saying anything, I pick up another empty cup and make tea for him. He guides me to sit at a round table, away from everyone else. I see girls from my training session watching me and talking to each other, as if they are gossiping. I ignore them.

  “How is your training so far?” he asks.

  “It is very informative. There is a lot to play around with, with the tools.”

  “All the trainees will get the latest versions, so that you can learn more on your own machines.”

  “That’s better still.” I take a sip of my tea. “So, you were involved in the development and enhancement of the latest version?”

  “Yes, in bits and pieces. But primarily in documenting it in the web world. Most of my time is spent on integration research and writing tutorials about the products.”

  “I have seen your books.”

  “You have a chance to read them?”

  “Frankly speaking, Mr. Murray, technology books don’t attract me.”

  “Then what kind of books do you read?”

  “Fiction, mostly.”

  “Interesting. You like unreal things?”

  “They are less torturous than reality.” I speak behind my cup of tea.

  “Very astute, Miss Ahmed.” We don’t speak any more for the entire tea session.

  After my tea, I excuse myself and join my training session. I concentrate completely for the next three hours, until Adam calls, reminding me the day is over. Adam informs me that he is waiting outside in the lobby for me, so I pick up my bag and hurry to the washroom to check if I am presentable for my newly created fake boyfriend. When I come out of the washroom, Ethan Murray is waiting for me.

  “Are you leaving?”

  “Yes, I have to go. Someone is waiting for me.”

  “Your rich boyfriend?” He says “rich” in a sarcastic tone. I know he wants to meet Adam, and he follows me without saying anything further. I see Adam sitting on a black leather sofa, dressed gracefully in his casual clothes. He stands up when he sees me coming toward him. I don’t know why, but I have never been so delighted to see him waiting for me. I put my bag down and hug him tightly. He pauses for a moment and I am sure he must be wondering what I’m doing, since I’ve never acted this way before. He holds me closer in his warm scented embrace.

  “I am so tired. I missed you.” I speak over his shoulder. I feel like smiling, and he rubs my back gently.

  “I missed you too…” He pauses for a moment, and continues. “Is everything okay, Rania? You seem upset.”

  How does he know my body so well, what I think, what I feel? Why is he so damn right, every time?

  He knows, though I have told him I missed him, it is not the truth. I pull myself away and he checks my expression.

  “I am just stressed out. Take me away.” I feel really good in his arms; I feel protected. I hug him again to feel the blessing that is holding me warmly.

  “Ahem, ahem.” I hear someone clearing his throat. I turn and see Ethan Murray waiting for us. Adam’s expression changes as soon as they make eye contact.

  “Good to see you, Mr. Gibson. Your girlfriend is very fond of you.” Murray looks at me, and then to Adam, with sharp eyes. “You have successfully charmed this beautiful lady.”

  “How are you, Ethan Murray. It has been a long time.” Adam shakes hands with him stiffly. Do they know each other? Why didn’t Murray mention that to me earlier? They glare each other.

  “Do you guys know each other?” I look back and forth between them.

  “I told you, Miss Ahmed. Who doesn’t know Mr. Gibson?” He gazes at me deeply and I notice the fire in Adam’s eyes.

  “Let’s go, Rania.” He grabs me by my shoulders and drags me away.

  “Won’t you introduce your girlfriend to me, Mr. Gibson?” Murray says behind us, which makes Adam freeze in his tracks.

  “You have already introduced yourself, Murray.” He leaves my side and gets in Murray’s face. “Stay away from her.” His voice is low, but I still hear him. I break in between them and pull Adam away.

  “Will someone tell me what is going on?” I look at Adam, who seems furious. “Adam? Tell me!”

  Ethan Murray adjusts his glasses and looks at me with a jagged smile. Adam grabs my hand and drags me out of the lobby. Our car is waiting outside; I slip inside and Adam joins me. His face and body are stiff and tense, and I also want to know what was behind his exchange with Murray. Obviously there is some history there. I remain quiet all the way back to our hotel.

  Ten minutes later, we are seated on the couch. Adam is rubbing his lower lip, thinking really hard about something. He goes to the bar and makes himself a drink, still angry, but putting up a front of calmness for me. He comes back with his glass of whiskey and sits next to me on the couch. “How do you know Ethan Murray?” he asks.

  “I should ask you that, Adam.” I cross my legs and face him. His eyes are fixed to the wall.

  “Answer me first, Rania. How do you know him?”

  “I don’t know him. I met him this morning. He is a digital media head with Adobe®. He opened the summit with a speech, and afterwards he sat down beside me and introduced himself.”

  “There were three hundred people there, Rania. What made him sit beside you and introduce himself?” Adam’s sudden question shocks me.

  “I… umm… I don’t know.” I shrug my shoulders.

  “What else did he talk about?” He’s still staring at the wall. Why isn’t he looking at me?

  “He invited me for… lunch…” I speak with hesitation, twisting my ring on my finger. He cocks his head toward me with disappointed look.

  “You lied to me?”

  “I didn’t lie to you, Adam. He introduced me to other colleagues and we had lunch. He offered me a job in Silicon Valley.”

  “And you accepted it?” He rises from the couch. “After all… who can refuse the charming Ethan Murray?”

  “I just don’t understand what you are talking about.”

  He turns and moves closer to me, squatting down before me, still holding the glass of whiskey. “What else did he say, Rania?” He leans closer, placing one hand under my ear and caressing my cheek with his thumb. “Did he tell you how beautiful you are? Did he tell you that you entranced him? Tell me, Rania. Did you like him complimenting you?”

  “What are you talking about, Adam?” I jerk his hand off my face and move away from him. He is not in his right mind—something is bothering him terribly. If I tell Adam it is all true, what he just said, then I have no idea how he will react, so I lie deliberately.

  “No, Adam, it was strictly professional. He didn’t say anything like that to me.” I take the glass and pull him up next to me. “What is it that you are holding back? Please, tell me.”

  “Did you accept his job offer?” He still doesn’t look at me.

  “No, I haven’t said anything.”

  “Are you going to accept it?”

  “I don’t know. He offered me a great deal and—”

  “And you will think about it. Right?” He looks down at the floor. “After all, it would be a big boost in your career.”

  “I haven’t decided anything. I have to finish my time in Canada, till I get my citizenship, and—”

  “Is that the only reason for you staying here?” He looks straight into my eyes. I am totally confused. “If you had citizenship, would you have considered his offer?”

  “Adam! Stop talking in riddles and tell me what this is about!”

  “I am sure he must have invited you to the next conference in New York.” He looks toward his shoes.

  “Yes, he did. How did you know?”

  “He intends to fuck you, Ra
nia, that’s why.” He looks up and faces me. “He wants to use your body, so that he can torture my soul. Will you let that happen?”

  “Of course not, Adam. Don’t you know me by now?”

  “I know you, but I know him also. He is a fucking charmer. How he lures women with his sweet talk, so that before you know it you will be in bed with him.”

  “Please, stop it, Adam. How can you say something like that?”

  “Because I know, Rania.” He raises his voice. “He fucked my sister, when she was only sixteen. I didn’t see Eva my whole life. One night, she called me from the hospital and told me that she was all alone there after an abortion, because some fucker made her pregnant and left her by herself in the hospital. It took her three months to recover from the trauma. She was only sixteen, damn it. She hadn’t even started college yet. I passed the message to the Moore family that she was on a summer break, but the fact was I used to take her to psychiatric treatment and after three months of therapy, she was able to face her family.” He pauses for a moment. “Mother still doesn’t know about it. It’s a secret between Eva and me.” He looks at me with tears in his eyes. “You are the only person I’ve ever told. I am telling you because I see the same danger coming to you. The way he looked at you… he was fucking you with his eyes, Rania. He is the true version of Satan, and the worst part is, I can see him.” I put my hands on my mouth, shocked at his revelations.

  He continues bombarding me with the rest. “Eva finally got settled in college and started her academic career. Mom still doesn’t know that we ever met. Once I knew she was fine, I didn’t see her anymore. Meanwhile, I registered a complaint against Murray; he was doing his doctoral program at the University of Toronto. The university suspended him for six months and he flew to California, where he started his career once again. He tried contacting Eva and blackmailed her. The fucking prick had videos of them having sex. I had to pay him a handsome amount to hand over everything to me, but I know he still has the originals. Who could sexually use and abuse a sixteen-year old girl and then blackmail her with the videos? Isn’t he a walking Satan?” I still have my hands over my mouth, riveted to every word. “Have you wondered how you got a seat at the front of the summit, when there were giants of technology attending? You think Ben did that?” He looks straight into my eyes. I am dumbfounded. “He wanted you to sit in front of him. He has been chasing you since he found out I have someone in my life. His luck is fucking awesome that you are in the same field. He sent an invitation through Ben, and asked if you could attend this summit, so he could meet you in a new city and cast a spell on you.”