Goddess for Hire

by Sonia Singh

  He patted the spot next to him, and I sat down. His eyes were tired and his jaw covered in stubble. “I was waiting for you.”

  I entwined my arm with his and rested my cheek on his shoulder. “I’m glad.”

  “You know, I think you went a tad overboard with Nadia. She was humiliated.”

  So much for snuggling.

  I moved away. “She had it coming. What about her crack that I had doomed the human race?”

  Tahir reached for my hand. “It’s not about her. It’s about you. Have you been out patrolling for malevolence lately?”

  I pulled my hand back. “I’ve been busy, okay? The meet and greet is as much a part of my job as fighting evil.”

  Tahir gave me a dubious look that roused my ire, and reached inside his pocket, pulling out a slip of paper. “I’ve been doing some research, asking around. I found her.”

  “Her?” I took the paper.

  Indira Bhatia

  GBS Syntex

  “GBS Syntex?” I asked. “How did you find this out?”

  He grinned. “Through the Indian grapevine. GBS Syntex is in Tustin. I’ll take the day off and go with you. We’ll just stroll through the lobby, find out where Indira’s office is, barge in there, and you can do your cool wind tunnel–mind control thing.” He glanced at his watch. “She’ll be at work in a couple of hours.”

  “Well thanks for the info,” I said. “But I really need to get some sleep.”

  “We’ll catch her in the evening, then, before she gets off work.”

  I didn’t respond.

  “Would you rather go by yourself?” he asked. “I understand. Although I was hoping to see you in action.” He smiled and slid his arm around my waist.

  “I’ll go when I can, Tahir.”

  His grin disappeared. “What’s more important? Sitting around and being petted and pampered, or going after the man who has sworn to kill you?”

  I shrugged his arm off me and stood up.

  “What’s wrong with you?” Tahir demanded.

  What was wrong with me?

  “I just want to enjoy being a goddess for a while. I don’t want to think about Sanjay or all the evil in the world. I want to bask in the attention, the love, the smiling faces of my parents and my aunts—who for once—aren’t trying to fix my life. I want to be with these people—these strangers—who’ve come from all over just to see me.”

  Me.

  Maya Mehra.

  Gandhi girl.

  Tahir slowly rose to his feet. “Maya…I didn’t realize…I’m sorry.”

  “Yeah, well, you were just trying to help.”

  He reached out and gently pulled me into his arms. I closed my eyes and pressed myself against him. He kissed me, and we pulled apart. “Now get a good night’s, ah, day’s sleep, and I’ll call you.”

  I smiled. “Okay.”

  He smiled back and turned to walk down the drive.

  Without thinking I blurted out, “Can you tell your mom to maybe ease up on me a little?”

  Tahir stopped, shoulders rigid. “What did you say about Ma?”

  Oops.

  There was no going back now. “What I mean is, I threw up on her, and that was bad. But I apologized, didn’t I? So why does she glare at me like she’s a sleeping cobra and I’m the little boy who’s been poking her with a stick?”

  Well it was a good metaphor.

  Tahir slowly turned around. “She’s come to every one of your Pujas, hasn’t she? Have you ever taken the time to talk to her?”

  “Talk to her? I can barely get within ten feet of her. She’s drenched herself in Eau de You’re Not Good Enough For My Son.”

  Tahir took a step forward. “Listen, the reason Ma flew in was because I told her how serious I am about you. I want her to get to know you, like you…”

  “Why do you even care what your mom thinks? We love each other. That should be enough.”

  Tahir’s laugh was abrasive. “Well it’s not. That’s the difference between India and America. I care what my parents think. I need for them to approve of the woman I love. I need their blessing. Couldn’t you try—”

  “Try what? Try to be a different person? Your mom obviously wants a typical Indian daughter-in-law who quietly pours tea and doesn’t speak her mind. I’m American. Screw that. I’m a goddess.”

  Tahir looked at me for a long moment, then turned and walked away.

  I tossed my hair. Whatever. I needed my beauty sleep. Tomorrow night my worshippers would be waiting. I turned to go back inside when—

  “Maya?”

  My brother Samir was coming up the walkway. He was on the shorter side—like all Mehra men—and had always been quiet and serious. I noticed he’d ditched the glasses, grown his hair, and had a leather satchel slung across his chest. He looked good. Stanford seemed to be agreeing with him.

  “Hey,” he said.

  “Hey.”

  He shoved his hands in his pockets. “So you’re really a goddess.”

  “Yeah.”

  “Cool.”

  “Can be.”

  “Well, I drove all night, so I’d better get some sleep.”

  “Me too.”

  Together we entered the house.

  It was the longest conversation Samir and I had had in years.

  Chapter 51

  TAHIR WAS just being a bitch.

  He’d come around.

  The little voice inside me, covered in dirt, crawled up from the hole and tried to say something. I clubbed her over the head for good measure and pushed her back in with my foot.

  I was never one to subscribe to that sacrifice-everything-for-your-family Indian shit. Unfortunately I’d fallen in love with a guy who did.

  What I didn’t get was why Pinky was so opposed to my relationship with her son? She and Aunt Dimple had made the match in the first place. It couldn’t just be because of the vomiting.

  I had a sudden sneaking suspicion.

  Picking up the cordless by my bedside, I dialed Aunt Dimple. “Tell me more about your lunch at McDonald’s with Pinky,” I said by way of greeting.

  My aunt was eating and talking at the same time, and her reply was unintelligible.

  “Aunt Dimple, can you not eat for a few minutes please?”

  “But I’m hungry,” she cried. “All morning I have been running around buying candles and incense and sandalwood—your mother has me doing all the hard work—I only had time for toast and egg in the morning. And then a Cinnabun and chocolate milk shake at the shopping mall.”

  “I’m sorry. But I need to know if Pinky really agreed to my match with Tahir.”

  Aunt Dimple was silent.

  I rubbed my forehead. “I won’t get mad.”

  “Well,” my aunt said slowly, “she liked your picture. She thought you were very pretty. She was happy you lived with your parents and not on your own doing God knows what. The age factor was appropriate—I had lied about that, you see, because you look so young—”

  “It’s okay,” I assured her. “Go on.”

  “But she wanted a girl born and raised in India, with Indian values.”

  “I knew it!” I couldn’t keep the triumph from my voice. “I knew you lied!”

  “I did not lie,” Aunt Dimple protested. “I wanted the two of you to meet because I knew it would be love at first sight. And it was, no?”

  Not.

  She continued. “I spoke to Tahir. I told him he had to meet my niece Maya.”

  “Told or begged?” I asked.

  More silence.

  I closed my eyes. “Forget it. What’s done is done. I just wanted to clear things up.”

  “But Maya, you’re a goddess! It is most auspicious to have a goddess in the family. Pinky will surely see that. Better than having a daughter-in-law who can cook and organize the household.”

  “Good-bye.” I hung up.

  I sat back against the pillows. So that explained it. Aunt Dimple had fudged the facts. Tahir’s mother had nev
er approved of me in the first place. She’d probably told Tahir to at least meet me just to make my family happy, and he’d agreed because we were providing him with room and board.

  None of that mattered now. I had no intention of trying to win Pinky over. It was an impossible task anyway. Tahir had to choose. His mother or me.

  I had a sick feeling I already knew the outcome.

  I wanted to wallow in my thoughts. I wanted to burrow under the blankets. I wanted to be alone.

  My bedroom door banged open, and Ram rushed in.

  I shrieked and pulled the sheet up to my chin. I was wearing a thin white cotton tank top that skimmed my ass, and no bra.

  “Rise and shine,” Ram said happily.

  “This is highly inappropriate,” I snapped.

  He waved his hand. “Bah. Every day the beautiful ebony statue of Kali-ma is undressed and bathed in milk by the chosen priests of our temple. At night she is dressed again.”

  “I’m not a statue, Ram!”

  “That is true.”

  “What do you want?”

  He sat on the edge of the bed. “I have found a most worthwhile organization. They rehabilitate snakes that were mistreated or abandoned as pets and release them into nature. You and I shall pay them a visit this afternoon.”

  “Snakes? Snakes give me the creeps—anything with scales does.” Including Tahir’s mother.

  Ram wagged his finger at me. “Snakes are good luck. They are worshipped in India.”

  “I thought snakes were considered an omen,” I argued.

  “Some worship snakes, some fear snakes, it is essentially the same thing,” Ram countered.

  It might have been the afternoon, but it was still too early for me to try and make sense of what he just said.

  “I’m not going, Ram.”

  He wagged his finger even harder. “A goddess must take care of her children. She must give back to the community. Half of what you are given must in turn be bestowed on those who need it.”

  “Fifty percent!” I sat up and the sheet dropped to my waist. Ram’s eyes widened, and I quickly lifted it up again. “You want me to give half my money away? Christians only give ten percent! I need this money, Ram, and I’m not giving it away. Especially not to a couple of snakes! I’m buying a condo.” I folded my arms and stared at him stubbornly.

  Ram sighed and sat up. “I cannot force my will on yours. I will go alone. There is much you still have to learn, and it is clear I will not be the one to teach you. I have failed.”

  “Come on, Ram—” I began, but he had already left.

  I got out of bed. Ram had left the bedroom door open, and I went to close it when a burly red-faced man in overalls walked down the hallway. “Can someone tell me where to set up the new altar?” He looked at me, and his eyes bulged.

  “Oh, grow up,” I snarled, and slammed the door in his face.

  Chapter 52

  BY DINNERTIME Ram still had not returned.

  My mom nervously tore her chapatti to shreds. “What should we do? Why didn’t I give him my cell phone?”

  I got up from the table. “I’m sure he’s fine.” It was time for me to start getting ready. First, a long soak in a tub filled with milk, almond oil, and rose hips.

  My dad pushed back his chair and burped. “Maya’s right. After all, if something had happened to Ram, she would have sensed it.”

  Umm.

  This wasn’t the time to inform my parents as to the extent of my powers. I’d spent enough years being a disappointment as a daughter. I didn’t want them seeing me as a disappointment as a goddess.

  My dad was scooping out a bowl of vanilla ice cream and my mom was heaping more food onto my brother’s plate. In an Indian household the son is forbidden to have an empty plate. Samir rubbed his stomach and looked faintly ill.

  No one was looking at me, so I turned around and quickly called the Goddess Within.

  I tried to zero in on Ram like I’d done with my parents. I didn’t feel anything.

  Huh.

  Well as long as the feeling wasn’t bad, that was good, right?

  I went up to take my bath.

  I stepped out of the tub, tying the towel around me when my mom ran into the bathroom.

  Seriously, did anybody ever knock around here?

  Then I noticed her pale face and the phone pressed to her chest. “What’s wrong?”

  “There was a call,” she gasped. “An accident.”

  I could feel the coldness seeping into my chest. “Ram?”

  She nodded. “He’s at the hospital.”

  Chapter 53

  I DIDN’T GO to the hospital.

  I made the excuse about needing to stick around in case any worshippers showed up.

  The truth was I couldn’t face Ram.

  I should have gone with him to that stupid snake farm or wherever the hell he went. I should have protected him.

  I could just imagine the conversation my parents and brother were having in the car. “Why didn’t Maya see this? Why didn’t she prevent this?”

  What was the point of going to the hospital anyway? It wasn’t like I could heal him.

  I flopped down onto the couch and buried my face in my hands. I knew who was behind Ram’s “accident.” I should have annihilated him when I had the chance.

  Ugh.

  The malevolence hit me at the same time the phone rang.

  It was Sanjay.

  If he was calling collect, I’d vanquish him.

  I ran to the kitchen and grabbed the phone in midring. “Sanjay, you bastard, what’d you do to Ram?”

  “How does it feel, when you can’t even protect the people around you?” he questioned smugly.

  Rage boiled up inside me. “He’s an old man. And he’s your cousin!”

  “He’s a damn nuisance,” Sanjay spat. “He was always criticizing my apartment.”

  “I will find you.”

  Sanjay laughed. “I overestimated you this whole time. Now everyone will know what a joke you are.” He laughed again.

  “Are you going for that whole maniacal laugh thing? ’Cause your voice is far too nasal to pull it off,” I pointed out.

  “You’ll never find me,” he said coldly, and hung up.

  I quickly punched star sixty-nine. The automated voice informed me that although the service was working…blah blah blah.

  I stood there, closed my eyes, and tried to zero in on Sanjay. I strained so hard I nearly burst a blood vessel in my brain.

  Nothing.

  When the doorbell rang I ignored it—I knew it was an early devotee—and went upstairs to my room. I retrieved the slip of paper Tahir had given me.

  Indira Bhatia

  GBS Syntex

  Maybe there was still a chance to redeem myself.

  I only hoped it wasn’t too late.

  Chapter 54

  BY 7:00 A.M. I was in the car and headed toward GBS Syntex in Tustin.

  Well, technically, I stopped off at Starbucks for a vanilla latte first, and then had to wait in a long line with a bunch of morning commuters.

  So by seven-thirty I was on my way to Tustin.

  I’d gotten the directions off Map Quest, and the tall glass building was hard to miss. I parked and noticed that half the cars had Cal Tech bumper stickers. I passed through the entrance and skirted a group of nerds to get to the circular reception desk. “Can you tell me where Indira Bhatia’s office is?”

  The young woman frowned. “Ms. Bhatia no longer works here.”

  The news hit me like a blow. I felt faint. “Are you sure?”

  “She quit.”

  “When?” I whispered.

  “Yesterday was her last day.”

  I reached for one last straw. “Do you have a number where I can reach her? An address? Do you know if she started another job? Please, I’ll take anything you can give me.”

  Her frown deepened. “I’m not allowed to divulge such information, but it doesn’t matter because I don’t
know. She wiped all her personal information from the computer database, which really messed up the system. Now I’m going to get stuck after work uploading all the new stuff and—”

  I turned away. The hope within me died.

  There was no point trying the Goddess Gaze, the receptionist was telling the truth.

  If only I hadn’t waited. If only I’d listened to Tahir.

  But not about his mother.

  Navigating through a cloud of failure, I trudged back to my car.

  Nadia was right. The human race was doomed.

  All because of me.

  Chapter 55

  I SAT ON my favorite stretch of beach.

  Thank God it was winter. I couldn’t imagine wallowing in misery with chattering children building sand castles nearby and horny teens rubbing suntan oil on each other.

  I had decided to give up my dharma.

  I wasn’t going to do the goddess thing anymore.

  I’d get a normal job like normal people and stop off at Starbucks at a normal hour and develop normal ulcers and die with all the normal regrets.

  Kali could be reborn as someone else next time.

  My worshippers would have to find someone else to idolize.

  Of course my Malevolent Meter would still go off, but I’d have to learn to ignore it. In the beginning it would be hard, but if that guy in A Beautiful Mind could turn his back on all the voices in his head, then I could turn my back on malevolence.

  Maybe it wasn’t the right or moral thing to do.

  But it was right for me.

  Before I knew it I was crying.

  Tahir had never called. I had thought he would. He and Nadia were probably consoling themselves together, both of them running down my list of faults, with Tahir’s mother jumping in every time they forgot something.

  I’d been so close. I had Tahir. I had Ram. I had a house filled with people who adored me. I had money and gifts. Nadia was the family leper. In short, my life for one happy moment had been perfect.