Wonderlust (Steel Roses #1)

by B. L. Wilde

“I didn’t realize you were…”

  “I’m a rock star. It’s kind of my job,” he chuckled. “Although, I haven’t written my own songs from scratch for years.”

  “Since Steel Roses,” I mused, almost in a daydream.

  “Yes.” His eyes widened. Shit! Why did I say that? “Were you a Roses fan?”

  “I liked some of your songs,” I lied, looking down at my plate. Really, I had been a hardcore groupie with posters all over my room.

  “Wow! You were a rock chick. I never would have guessed. I had you down as a boy band kind of girl.” Not him, too? He and Diego had me all wrong.

  “Technically, you were a boy band.” I couldn’t help but tease him.

  “Like fuck we were. We were a rock band. I wasn’t some pretty boy whose balls hadn’t dropped. I was pure, dirty, hard, rock and roll.” Holding my legs together, I steadied my breathing. He had been pure sex in Steel Roses. Remembering the first time I’d seen them live, I smiled. He’d radiated sexual desire the whole time. I’d never felt a connection from one man on a single stage before. That night, the entire arena surrendered to him the moment he sang the first line to Caged. It had been an incredible evening.

  “I don’t remember it that well. Like I said, I only knew a few of your songs. Besides, I was only a teenager when Steel Roses was together.”

  “Teenagers were our main fan base. Are you sure there isn’t something you want to tell me?”

  “No. Like what?”

  “That you’re a secret Steel Roses fan and have been in love with me since you were a teenager.”

  “Ha! You wish.” I may have overdone the fit of the giggles as I tried to mask the truth. “My best friend back in London is a huge fan of yours, though.”

  “Is that so? Maybe you should invite her over. I’d love to meet her.”

  “You really think I’d let you near my best friend?” I snorted.

  “It’s your duty as her best friend to make her dream come true. Honestly, what kind of friend are you?” He nudged me playfully.

  “I’m a damn good friend by keeping her away from you.”

  “Ouch. Why don’t you say it like it is?”

  “You know I always do,” I grinned, taking my last bite of food.

  “It’s definitely a change. I didn’t think I’d enjoy having a woman challenge me as much as you do.” He seemed to shake the idea off.

  “I didn’t think I’d make friends with a rock star, either.”

  “Is that what we are now?” He was trying to hide his smirk.

  “Well, we’re not enemies anymore.” Getting up, I began to clear the breakfast table while he finished his food. He hadn’t mentioned our conversation from last night and it didn’t seem like the right time to bring it up. He was in a good mood for once.

  “That’s a good thing. We have a busy few months ahead of us.”

  He wasn’t kidding. We’d hardly be at his hilltop mansion over the next few months. In fact, we’d be flying all over the world to promote the new aftershave brand, Latitude, he was representing. Plus, he was scheduled to shoot the campaign footage for it in London. It would be nice to go home for a few days.

  He had various media events that coincided with the country he was in, from talk shows to radio interviews, as well as the private show for his billionaire friend in Macon. It was going to be an exhausting few months. That was for sure.

  I pushed through into the hotel entrance with two freshly brewed coffees in my hands. Bloody fan girls were everywhere. The thought had me laughing to myself. Ten years ago that would have been me. Although, I’d never been lucky enough back in those days to find out the hotel Alex had been staying at.

  We were currently in Paris. Alex had been stuck in interviews for almost three hours now. His European publicist, Dustin Fairbanks, was perhaps the best-dressed man in Europe. He had taken over my duties, so all I could do was keep Alex fueled with coffee and Maltesers. Dustin was prim and proper: a true English gentleman with dark, slicked black hair, brooding brown eyes, and an immaculate sense of dress.

  We’d been away for almost three weeks now, with London as our next stop. I’d never seen a commercial filmed before, and was excited to watch it take place. It also meant I’d get to see Liv, though I hadn’t told her yet. A surprise visit was probably a better idea once she knew I was here with Alex.

  “Is my break coming up soon?” Alex sighed once I’d made my way over to him. Shane was chatting with hotel security in the far corner of the room.

  “I counted another five interviews on the schedule before we wrap. Our flight to London leaves at six. After that, you’ll finally be able to rest until tomorrow morning.” He nodded solemnly, taking a cup of coffee from me.

  “Thanks, I needed this.”

  “If you’re good, I’ll let you have a packet of Maltesers with your next coffee.”

  “I’ll be good, then,” he winked, getting up to take his seat for the next string of interviews.

  Alex was in full rock star mode today, complete with his legendary ego. His tight leather trousers and V-neck shirt clung to him in all the right places. Sitting and watching him being interviewed was quite amusing, too.

  “Are you trying to get rid of your bad boy image by promoting Latitudes latest aftershave?” the reporter from Rock News asked, flicking her red hair behind her shoulder while giving him her best come to bed eyes. “You have to admit, Alex, no one would have put you and this brand together.”

  “I have a bad boy image?” Alex frowned in confusion. “Where on earth did you get that idea from?” The reporter looked stunned and began going through her notes, embarrassed. I almost felt sorry for the woman, but I was laughing too much. “I’m just kidding. I wanted to go outside the box. People think they know me from my past, but I’m not that man anymore.”

  “Are you saying you’re reformed?”

  “Not quite yet, but I’m working on it.” His eyes found mine as he spoke, and the intensity of his gaze made me look away. Why did he keep doing that?

  “You seem to be taking style more seriously these days, and now you’ve signed a contract to promote an aftershave. Is this your way of telling us that you’re leaving music behind?”

  “Not at all. Music will always be my first love. It made me who I am today. I’ve turned down a lot of contracts over the years with different sponsors. Latitude just came at the right time. The aftershave it quite relatable to me.”

  ”You are certainly giving the brand more of an edge.” The redhead began to suck on her pen while giving him lustful gazes. Could she be more of a whore?

  “How’s he doing?” Dustin muttered from behind me, touching my shoulder.

  “He’s getting tired, I think.”

  “Diego was right about you.” Turning to look at Dustin, I frowned. “Alex has never had someone so concerned for his welfare before. It’s been good. I’ve noticed the change in him. He’s a lot calmer. Usually, he would have flipped out by now and refused to do anymore interviews.”

  “There’s still time,” I teased, looking down at my phone as it began to ring. “Excuse me for a moment.” Frowning, I looked down at the withheld number. Maybe my parents were trying to get hold of me on a different phone. They’d done that a few times while away. “Hello.” I answered the call once I was in the corridor.

  “Have you been deliberately ignoring my calls?” I froze, stunned. What was David doing calling me? “Nat, answer me. Why haven’t you called me back?”

  “David, I don’t work for you anymore. What could we possibly have to say to each other?” I didn’t remember receiving that many calls from him. I may have ignored a few, but that was because I’d taken this job to get some distance from him.

  “Plenty. I want you to come back to Flavour Records. Whatever Rock Records is paying you, I’ll match it.”

  “What?” Gasping, I noticed Diego was making his way down the corridor toward me. I didn’t want him to hear this conversation. “That’s not going to happ
en, David. I’m happy working for Alex.”

  “Are you sleeping with him?”

  “That is none of your business?” I hissed as quietly as I could into the phone, turning my back to Diego.

  “You wouldn’t have a fling with me behind my girlfriend’s back, but you’ll happily get it on with a washed out rock star.”

  “I wasn’t going to be your mistress!”

  “Nothing ever stopped you before. You were always begging for it.”

  “You fucking asshole! I can’t believe that I ever had feelings for you! Wish Sarah luck for me, because she’s going to need it marrying a womanizing prick like you! Goodbye, David!” I hung up harshly, wincing when I turned back around. Diego had obviously heard everything.

  “Girl, you need to tell me everything. Who is David?” He looked way too excited, clapping his hands together.

  “It’s nothing. Can we just drop it?”

  “Oh, come on!”

  “Diego! Just fucking leave it!” I lost my temper, storming outside. I needed some air. David had riled me up, but it was wrong to take it out on Diego like that.

  Leaning against the wall outside, I looked up at the sky, watching the clouds slowly glide over the city. What was David playing at? He wasn’t supposed to keep hassling me. He had Sarah. For a split second, I wondered if he’d discovered that he cared for me, but that would be ridiculous. What man would want me over Sarah Greaves?

  “Nat?” Steve’s voice pulled me from my thoughts. “Sorry, but Alex is asking for you. He’s finished with the interviews.”

  “Tell him I’ll be right there. I just need a minute.” Steve nodded, leaving me to collect my thoughts. David was not going to get to me. Taking a deep breath, I squared my shoulders and walked back in.

  “Where did you go?” Alex asked, slipping into his leather jacket. Men in leather…it did things to me.

  “I needed some fresh air. It was getting hot in here. The car should be here soon to take us to the airport. I’ll go and check with reception.”

  Touching the side of my face gently, he studied me. “Are you okay?”

  “Yes, why wouldn’t I be?”

  “Diego said…”

  “Alex, I don’t want to discuss my personal life with you. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have work to do.”

  We made it in plenty of time for our flight to London. Diego gave me the cold shoulder the whole ride over. I’d need to apologize to him later. We were on a private plane, so I couldn’t do it until we landed. I didn’t want everyone to hear our conversation.

  “Do you have any chocolate left?" Alex asked, moving to sit across from me. Searching in my bag, I found a few packets of Maltesers and some Cadbury Freddo bars. “You’re a life saver.” He was such a big kid when it came to his chocolate and candy. “What?” he asked with a mouthful of chocolate.

  “You, Mr. Rock Star, eating chocolate like a five year old.”

  “This is good shit. It’s the one thing I’m not ashamed of being addicted to.” His words apparently stunned him. Maybe he hadn’t meant to let that slip. “Chocolate doesn’t fuck me up after I’ve had it, that’s for sure.”

  “You just enjoy the sugar rush,” I grinned. “My parents used to ban chocolate and sweets after five o'clock when I was younger because I’d be too hyper before bedtime.”

  “They sound like caring parents.”

  “They are.” I smiled fondly, thinking about them. “They’re on a world cruise right now. They had an antiques shop in Soho, London for almost thirty years, but they’re both retired now.”

  “You’re a proper Londoner then,” he smirked. “My parents split up when I was ten and I moved to the states with my mom. I wasn’t given a choice.” He opened a pack of Maltesers, offering some to me before diving into the bag himself. “I remember all the arguing before they split. Mom used to spend most nights crying. It was better once we moved to the US. Destructive love, that’s what my parents had. It’s the worst kind.”

  “You wrote a song about that when you were in Steel Roses—Slay Me.” Why did I let that slip out? How did I remember all this crap? It was years ago. He stopped mid chew, looking quizzically at me. “I remember my best friend, Liv, telling me about the song years ago,” I rebuffed, looking toward the window to avoid his gaze.

  “Did you like the song?” His voice was so tender that it made my eyes snap up toward his. It was my favorite song, but I couldn’t tell him that.

  “The song is beautiful. I never get tired of listening to it.” I had to be honest. It was a work of art, like pure poetry.

  “Wow! Another compliment. Easy, Straight Lace.” Blushing, I looked away. What was this man doing to me? He was breaking my damn defenses; that’s what he was doing! I liked him; I couldn’t deny that to myself anymore. His ego didn’t even seem to bother me as much as it used to. I loved our banter that came with it. “Are you excited to be going home for a few days?”

  “Yeah.” Sighing, I looked out the window. I’d be more excited if David wasn’t hassling me.

  “That doesn’t sound very convincing.”

  “I’m just tired, sorry.” I forced a yawn and stretched. This conversation would lead to David if it carried on, and I didn’t want that.

  “I’ll leave you to take a nap.” Alex got the message and moved to sit with Diego.

  Resting my eyes, all I could think about was David. I really hoped he didn’t know that Alex and I were coming to London. If he showed up, I had a feeling things might get messy.

  Chapter Ten

  “Hey, wakey, wakey. We’re here.” Alex was shaking me gently as I fluttered my eyes open. Crap, I’d fallen asleep. Gathering my things quickly, I followed everyone out onto the tarmac.

  “Diego, I’m sorry about earlier,” I whispered, grateful that he was even letting me walk next to him. “It’s complicated with David and I.”

  “Did he finish with you? Or was it the other way around?” I scanned ahead of us. Alex was out of earshot, which was good.

  “It never really started. It was an on again-off again fling.”

  “I see. Are you in love with him?” He was so blunt. “You can’t run away from your feelings, Nat. It only makes things worse.”

  “He’s getting married.”

  “Jesus, you were seeing an engaged man!” Everyone turned to look at us as Diego screeched. Great!

  “No, I was seeing him before they got together,” I stressed, rushing into one of the two waiting cars. I expected Diego to get into the back seat with me, but my eyes widened when Alex joined me.

  “What are you and Diego arguing about?”

  “It’s nothing. He overheard a phone call of mine that he shouldn’t have.”

  “Nat, if you’re being coy about your relationship with David Barclay, you don’t have to be. I’ve known about it for a while.” My mouth fell open. “He’s been hassling Gina with calls since the first week you started.” Oh no!

  “He has?” I gasped. “Alex, I’m so sorry.”

  “What are you sorry for? He’s the asshole that can’t let go.” Putting my head in my hands, I took a deep breath. “Don’t sweat this, Nat. You made the right choice leaving his sorry ass behind.” I looked up, frowning. “You’ll see the world with me. David can only show you a desk in London.”

  “It wasn’t just a working relationship, though, Alex.”

  “You love him?” Tears were brimming in my eyes as I nodded. “Why did you apply for this job then?”

  “To get some distance. He’s engaged to Sarah Greaves.” Realization spread across his face. “We didn’t do anything behind her back. Our fling stopped once he started seeing her.”

  “Was that his choice or yours?”

  “Mine. I don’t do any form of cheating. None of this matters anyway. It’s my personal life.”

  “You said we were friends now. I’m just looking out for you.” Alex’s smile was so sincere. I took my time to admire his fine features. He was such a good-looking guy. He’d
become even more attractive to me in the last few weeks, if that was even possible.

  “Thanks, but I’m fine, really.” The car pulled up outside the back entrance to The Dorchester Hotel. I was relieved to have the evening to myself because I felt emotionally drained.

  “Are you coming to the bar for a nightcap?” Dustin asked once we’d all been checked in. Shane was liaising with the concierge, making sure the bags went to the correct rooms, and Alex had already been shown to his suite with Steve.

  “No, I’m going to lie down. I’m exhausted.”

  “Okay, I’ll see you in the morning,” Dustin called. Diego gave me a sympathetic smile as I walked past him to the elevator.

  Once I’d messaged Liv to let her know that I’d be in town tomorrow, my head hit the pillow and I fell asleep. Exhaustion had taken over.

  “Alex, give me that smolder one more time when Maddison jumps on the back of the bike,” the director called. They’d been shooting the commercial for a few hours now. I would have been more enjoying if Maddison Lily wasn’t Alex’s leading lady. If I thought she’d been annoying when I first met her at the interview stages with Gina, that was nothing compared to watching her gush all over Alex. She was still stunning, but in a completely fake way. From blonde hair extensions to blood red nails, it made me wonder if any part of her was natural.

  “Do you think I should open another button on my shirt?” Maddison asked innocently, thrusting her chest in Alex’s direction.

  “Darling, I don’t think that’s my decision,” he chuckled, gazing down at her breasts. “But if it was, I’d say yes.” Ugh! Why was he flirting with her? Was she really the kind of woman he liked? She was just like all the other bimbos!

  “You should have given me the job, Alex. We would have had so much fun together,” she giggled, moving to get on the back of his Harley. Alex riding a motorcycle was hot to watch. It reminded me of a Steel Roses music video back in his early days. I may have had to wipe a little drool from my mouth when I first saw him ride it onto the set.

  “I don’t think we would have gotten any work done, Maddison,” he winked suggestively. I slammed my clipboard down before storming off, making them both look in my direction. Fine! If he wanted Madison as his PA, he could have her!