Skeletons

by McFadden, Shimeka

  When we got home the kids went up to their rooms to change clothes so Mike could take them to his parent’s house. I went into the kitchen to make a snack for everyone, Mike followed.

  “What did you really think about today’s sermon?” he questioned as he loosened his tie and threw it on the island.

  “I thought that it was an interesting message that needed to be said.” I responded moving the tie from the island and placing it back in his hand. “Put this in the laundry room.”

  “I agree there are some skeletons in people’s closets that just need to come out but when they do…well I’m sure that you know where I’m coming from.” He said then walked upstairs to change clothes.

  Taking my phone out of my purse I read Tabitha’s message again then hit the delete button just in case Mike decided to snoop through my cellphone.

  Mike came to bed that night and attempted to put his arms around me, what usually felt normal and comforting now felt annoying and wrong.

  “Baby what is going on with you?” he asked, “I don’t want to fight, but you have been acting strange lately and I can’t help but think that you have another man in your life.”

  Turning over on my back I fumed, “Mike you should know me better than that but if I did have another man you need to stop and ask yourself why it is that I chose to disrespect our marriage vows in the first place.”

  “Baby I’m trying everything in my power to make you happy, but when you don’t communicate with me how do I know what is going on.”

  “I do communicate with you, but a major part of the communication process is listening and I can’t help that you don’t do that very well.”

  Mike let out a hurt sigh, “Now you insult me.”

  Sitting up in our king sized sleigh bed, I looked at Mike in disbelief, “On one hand you want me to communicate and tell you what is wrong but as soon as I do that you get offended. That is exactly why this whole conversation is pointless.”

  “How can something that can benefit our marriage be pointless Santana?” he asked with pleading eyes.

  “Look I’m tired and we both have to work in the morning.” I gave up while rubbing my temples in frustration, “Let’s just get some sleep.” I turned my body away from him and pulled the covers up to my ears. I knew that Mike was hurt, but at this point it was time for me to do me, it was time for me to be selfish.

  22

  Jovanna

  I couldn’t breathe; my flailing arms were growing limp by every second that passed; I felt my eyes struggling to stay open, but that too was a fight that I was losing. Gasping for air, I fought my assailant to get loose, but I felt my life slipping away as my soul began to prepare itself for the next journey. Chad’s hands felt like vice grips around my neck, the uncaring look in his grey eyes was as emotionless as the blade that lay stuck in my back. I was dying a slow and painful death, in the background I could hear Justin’s pleading voice calling out for me by my name, Marquita.

  Waking up from my nap I was drenched in sweat, my breaths were deep and jagged. Jumping up from the couch I ran into the bathroom and threw cold water on my face. Looking at my red, swollen eyes I could still feel his hands around my throat, choking the life out of me. I knew Chad, and I knew that he would not give up until I gave him what he wanted. I now regretted what happened the night that I thought I left my past behind me.

  Wishing that I could take back my past, I knew that I had to make right what I did wrong over ten years ago, but in order to do that I would have to contact Chad and that was something that I was not prepared to do.

  July 1999

  The Memphis heat was sweltering; I grabbed my spray bottle and spritzed water on my face and body in an attempt to cool down. Even though it was well past midnight, the temperature was still in the mid nineties. Standing outside of the Centennial Inn on Shelby Street, my feet were starting to ache; I didn’t know what was taking Chad so long to get here, the job was over an hour and a half ago.

  Chad had been acting really funny towards me since he found out about me taking G.E.D classes during the day.

  Chad causally pulled up to the front of the motel as if he were on time, rolling my eyes I got inside of the candy-apple red Cadillac which was paid for with money earned on the backs of his women. The stench of the Don Diego cigar smoke filled my nostrils and lungs and I coughed.

  “It took you long enough.” I fussed underneath my breath.

  Not saying so much as hello, Chad held out his soft hands to accept the stack of fresh bills that I laid in his palm. Slamming ten, fresh twenty-dollar bills in his hands I folded my arms across my breast waiting as he counted every single bill as if I couldn’t be trusted. I knew better than to skim money off the top, I’d seen girls get beat down from trying to steal money from Chad.

  Loving Chad came so easily when I was a wide-eyed seventeen-year- old, run-away who was looking for someone to love. My parents were too fucked up to give a care, both too strung out on crack to even know that I ran away. When he found me working at the Honey Lounge he was my escape from a place that I had to drink or smoke weed in order to get up on stage. He took me away from all of that, his words were so smooth that he drew me in and I never wanted to leave him. First he made love to my mind, then he made love to my body and I was in love with him.

  Loving Chad came easily because he treated me better than any of the men that came to the Honey Pot; he even treated me better than my own parents. Chad was more than my pimp, he was more than my boyfriend, he was even more than my husband; Chad was like my father and he taught me the tricks of my trade like a child learned to ride the bike from her father. I hung on to his every word as if he was a God and I was his follower. Now that love that I felt for him was gone, replaced by hatred and disgust.

  The smooth words that he used to say to get me to do whatever he wanted now I didn’t even listen when he talked. His touch was so loving and caring at one point, but now I couldn’t even stand the smell of him or his foul smelling cigars. As much as I hated Chad, I knew that he had a hold on me and unless I left him I would be stuck with him until I stopped earning him money. I knew that I had to get away from him.

  Tasha was one of the girls that worked for Chad; we lived in a two bed-room apartment around the corner from him. Chad was so insecure in himself that he had to have complete control over every aspect of our lives. Not only where we lived, but also what we ate as he brought all of our groceries, what we wore as he took us shopping and every time we left the house as if we left the house without him knowing we would pay for it later. I was twenty-two and I felt sorry for Chad, he was a sad and pitiful excuse for a man and I couldn’t wait to leave him.

  “I am tired of this shit Tasha!” I fussed right after Chad dropped me off that night.

  Looking up from polishing her toes Tasha said, “What is going on?”

  “Not only did this fat fuck of a trick spit his foul tasting come all on my face, but Chad took his sweet time picking me up tonight!”

  “Be careful of what you say Marquita,” my friend warned as she looked towards Sunny and Lacy’s room, “You never know who will snitch.”

  Sunny and Lacy were two of Chad’s other girls and they hated Tasha and me because we got the higher end clients and they looked for every chance they got to snitch on us.

  Rolling my eyes I continued, “I don’t even care anymore Tasha, it’s not like Chad hasn’t kicked my ass enough already. To add insult to injury he won’t even let us see a dime of the money that we earn.”

  Taking the wig off, I tossed it across the room, “I’m just tired of working my ass off and not having anything to show for it. Yet this slimy mother fucker walks around in five-hundred dollar suits, three-hundred dollar gators and one-hundred dollar hats! I swear if I could get my hands on that money that he keeps in his safe….”

  Tasha quickly looked up at me and closed our bedroom door, “What money in what safe?” my usually loud-mouthed friend whispered.

  “Cha
d keeps our money in a safe that is hidden in his closet at his house.”

  “Have you seen it with your own eyes because I’ve never been inside of his apartment?”

  At one point I was one of Chad’s personal girls so he would invite me to spend some time with him in his apartment so I knew where almost everything was.

  “Yes I’d seen it with my own eyes girl,” I told my wide-eyed friend, “Every time a girl would pay him he would put the money in that safe. There has to be over ten-thousand dollars in there at one time.”

  “Wow girl, we’d better stop talking about this before we get into some kind of trouble.” She said nervously.

  In deep thought for the rest of the night, I showered then got in bed and I whispered to Tasha, “I’m going to get my money even if I have to step over that bastard’s dead body to get it.”

  23

  Santana

  Tabitha made me want her even more than my fantasies already did. Pulling away our breathing was shallow as we reluctantly released our embrace as not to get caught while we were in the elevator.

  “I bet Mike doesn’t make you feel like that.” She smiled, “I also know that your panties are drenched.”

  “I feel like I peed on myself, but I could feel how hard your nipples were through your shirt.”

  We giggled like two school girls until the elevator opened and Mr. Gold and his assistant walked in.

  “Good morning Mrs. Montgomery.” He addressed me, ignoring Tabitha.

  “Good morning Mr. Gold.” I spoke, “Good morning Julie.” I addressed his assistant.

  Tabitha, feeling disrepected, stepped up to Mr. Gold with her hand extended, “Hello Mr. Gold I don’t think that we’ve been formally introduced, my name is Tabitha Gray.”

  Halfheartedly Mr. Gold shook Tabitha’s hand; I had to admit that she had balls to approach him. “Nice to finally meet you Tabitha.” He said, “I hope that you are keeping a professional profile while you are here.”

  “I always keep a professional profile Mr. Gold; maybe you haven’t seen my resume.” Tabitha said through silted eyes.

  “Professionalism is very important and if you want to stay in this company always remember that.” He continued. “Fraternization amongst employees is strictly prohibited we are here to work not play.”

  Tabitha looked uncomfortable for the rest of the ride to our floor where we got off and said goodbye to Mr. Gold and Julie.

  “Did he really have to treat me like that?” she huffed as we walked to my office.

  “That is just how Mr. Gold is, always has been and always will be don’t be offended.”

  “Whatever, but thanks for having my back.” She rolled her eyes and went to her desk where she stayed for the rest of the day.

  Mr. Gold called an impromptu meeting to discuss some of the expense accounts which he and Julie have been watching closely that he wanted copies of everyone’s receipts for the month. After the meeting I headed back to my office, but noticed Tabitha crying as I passed her desk. Not wanting to disturb her I walked past her as if I didn’t notice and sat at my desk. A moment later my phone rang,

  “This is Santana.” I answered with my eye toward the door waiting for Tabitha to come in as she normally did.

  “Santana Montgomery?” the female on the other end asked.

  “Yes, how may I help you?”

  “You can’t help me, but I can help you.” She said, her voice was light and airy almost childlike, but filled with pain.

  “Excuse me?”

  “Tabitha is not who she appears to be, you better watch your back, better yet you’d better watch your bank account.” She spoke.

  “I’m sorry, but who is this?”

  Click. The phone went dead.

  Riding home that evening I kept a close watch on the rearview mirror wondering who the strange women that called me and how she knew about Tabitha and I. When I got home, Mike and the kids wanted to go to The Olive Garden for dinner since I didn’t feel like cooking anyway I decided that it was a great idea. For the first night in a long time Mike and I actually talked and laughed like we use to, but it was still in front of the children that we connected. The problem was that I don’t want to connect with him as mother and father; I wanted to connect with him as husband, wife and lovers.

  During dinner my cellphone rang, it was Tabitha I left the table telling Mike and the kids that I had to take the call.

  “I’m sorry about earlier.” She said. “It is just that I had a bad morning already and Mr. Gold just made it worse. He made me feel like I am nothing.” She explained. “All of my life I’ve had to put up with people shitting on me and treating me as if I am nothing.”

  “That is okay, you can’t let what that old fool says disrupt your entire day like that Tabitha.” I said, “Is that why you were crying at your desk this afternoon?”

  She was silent for a moment, “I didn’t mean for you to see that.”

  “What was the matter Tabitha?” I asked truly concerned.

  “I may have my car repossessed.” She said.

  “Repossessed, but why?” I asked.

  “Because I can’t pay my car note due to being out of work for three months before I started working for you.”

  “They are not willing to work with you?” I asked.

  “Yeah right not in this day and age.” She scoffed, “But don’t worry about it I will find a way.” She said.

  “You can’t be without your car honey; is there anyone that you can borrow the money from? Your parent’s maybe.”

  She laughed, “Girl I haven’t seen my parents in years. To them I was never good enough that is the reason that I moved to St. Louis in the first place.”

  “I know the feeling of not having supportive parents.” I said thinking of my own.

  “Maybe I can sell some of my jewelry or clothes to get the fifteen-hundred dollars that I need in order to keep my car.”

  “No, don’t sell your things Tabitha.”

  “How else can I get the money?” she asked.

  “I will let you borrow it and you can pay me back whenever you can.”

  “No I couldn’t take that much money from you Santana.” She gasped.

  “It is a loan and besides I can’t see you without your car.”

  “St. Louis buses run all day then and is the Metrolink.”

  “Don’t worry about it sweetie, I’ll give you the money tomorrow morning.”

  She began to cry, “Thank you so much Santana, you are such a good friend.”

  “No problem. I am out to dinner with Mike and the kids so I’ll see you in the morning.”

  “Okay, thank you so much.”

  Mike eyed me as I sat back at the table, “Was that Mr. Gold?” he asked.

  “No, it was Asteria and her boy troubles as usual.” I lied.

  Mike may have paid for dinner that night, but by the look on his face he did not buy the lie that I was selling.

  24

  Asteria

  I had not talked to Keith since the night he left my house over a week ago. He wouldn’t answer my calls, texts or emails and as much as I hated him for cheating on me with Keisha I hated not being able to at least talk to him. On the outside I seemed perfectly fine, but inside I was dying without him. I missed his touch, his kiss and the way he sent me to the moon with each stroke of his dick. Every time I thought of him and Keisha together I wanted to throw up. I couldn’t believe that he would betray me like this.

  Every day that I walked into work Keisha made it her business to smile and speak to me as if her ass were not sleeping with my man. Pandia questioned me on why I changed my mind on firing her and I just told her that I was going to give the girl one more chance to improve.

  Saturday was my day off so I went shopping with Jovanna and Santana meeting them at the Galleria in Clayton which was not too far from my house and the salon.

  I hugged Santana before I looked at Jovanna; I was still pissed off at her for what she had the nerve
to say to me the last time we were together.

  “Hey Asteria, I’m sorry for how I came at you the last time.” She said, “I was bogus and out of line for what I said to you. I’m under a lot of pressure and I took it out on the wrong person.”

  Smiling I hugged my best friend, “It’s cool girl, I figured that you were stressing about the wedding.”

  Santana looked confused, “Are you guys keeping secrets now?”

  We all laughed, “Now we just had some silly ass words between us. It is squashed now.” I said.

  “I was about to say because we have been friends with one another for far too long to be keeping secrets.”

  “You guys know everything there is to know about me so I have nothing to hide.” Jovanna smiled.

  “Yeah, the two of you know me better than my own husband.” Santana added.

  “Best friends never keep secrets from one another.” I said knowing that my own skeleton wanted to come out of the closet.

  After shopping we had lunch at The Cheesecake Factory then parted ways. Pulling up to my house I was amazed to see Keith’s squad car parked in its usual hiding space behind the building next to the huge oak tree.

  The smell of his cologne was in the air as I walked in and sat my bags down at the door.

  “What are you doing here?” I asked as I walked into my bedroom seeing him lying across my bed watching television.

  “Where is Latif?” he asked.

  “With your wife, why?”

  “I see that you’ve been out spending more money.”

  Rolling my eyes at him I began to take off my coat and boots, “If you came to see my son you need to go home because that is where he is.”

  “I came to see you.” He said as he walked towards me wearing nothing but a pair of Sean John boxer briefs. “Did you miss me?” I could not help but notice the huge bulge that threatened to be released from his underwear.

  I wanted to tell him no and to go to Keisha’s house, but my tongue wouldn’t cooperate with my mind so I whispered, “Yes.”