Skeletons

by McFadden, Shimeka

  I couldn’t breathe, herpes, does that mean that I have it as well and I that could have given it to Eric.

  Pandia put the cigarette on the ground and stomped it, “I can’t wait to see him.”

  Me either, I thought.

  I called my gynecologist as soon as I got into my office and she agreed to see me within the hour. Dr. Franklin was an old family friend and the first to discover the lump in my mom’s breast before she was diagnosed with cancer. The checkup was painless and it revealed that I didn’t have anything to worry about which was a relief.

  Pandia looked at me crazy when I got back to the office after the appointment. I lied and told her that I had to make some deposits at the bank when she asked where I’d been. I felt bad that my sister had herpes but I still felt that it was her own fault for staying with Keith even though she knew that he was cheating on her. I blamed her for being dumb and staying with a man who slept around on her.

  I knew that I was wrong for sleeping with her husband, but she was wrong for staying with him and putting not only her heart, but also her body in jeopardy. As much as the sound of his voice made me sick, I had to call Keith and ask him how he planned on dealing with the fact that Pandia knew about the child support that was being deducted from his check.

  “What do you mean what am I going to do? I am going to tell her the truth.”

  “What!” I exclaimed.

  “I am going to tell her that I got some chick knocked up and the girl refused to get an abortion.”

  “What if she wants to see the baby?” I questioned.

  “If she wants to see the baby then I am going to tell her that the bitch moved out of town and that I’ve never even see the baby.”

  I sighed, relieved, “You are real trifling Keith; now my sister has to live with herpes for the rest of her life because you just can’t keep your slimy dick in your pants.”

  “Herpes, what are you talking about?” He scoffed.

  “Don’t play stupid Keith; Pandia told me that you gave her herpes and that you told her that you got it from one of your trifling whores that you have been with.”

  Keith laughed, “Your sister is using a lie to get the truth.” He laughed again, “I’ve always told her that she should have went to the police academy instead of me. Look I don’t have herpes, Pandia doesn’t have herpes. I used protection with everyone except you.”

  Why would Pandia lie to me, I thought then I began to panic; Keith was right, Pandia was using a lie to get the truth.

  “I have to go.” I said as I rushed him off of the phone.

  I knew that it would happen sooner or later, I knew that I couldn’t keep my secret locked away in a closet forever. Slowly my skeleton was about to show her ugly head.

  37

  Jovanna

  The pain that radiated throughout my body woke me up; I looked to my left to see Justin talking to his brother Sam only rushing to my side when he saw that I was awake.

  “Jovanna!” he kissed me on my forehead. “Baby are you okay?”

  I coughed; it hurt to try to talk.

  “Don’t say anything save your strength.”

  “Hey kid, how are you?”

  I gave Sam weak thumbs up.

  “I am going to go get the nurse to let her know that you are awake.” Sam said.

  Justin kissed me all over my face; it felt like I’d been in the ring with Floyd Mayweather. Fighting through the pain I reached up and touched the right side of my face which was swollen down to my lips. My neck was so tender and swollen that I could still feel exactly where Chad’s hands were gripping it. A single tear ran down my face when I saw the look of hurt on Justin’s face.

  “What happened sweetheart?” he asked, “Why did you lie to me?”

  I shook my head.

  “Please Jovanna; please don’t lie to me any longer.” He begged, “Whatever it is I’m sure that we could work through it, but I cannot take the lies.”

  Justin put his head down on the bed and sobbed; my heart was in more pain than my body because as much as I wanted to tell Justin the truth, I knew that he would never understand. I had to lie to protect him. Three nurses walked into the room and asked Justin to step out while she checked my wound, my vitals and cleaned me up. I was relieved to see him go because I couldn’t stand seeing him hurt so much any longer.

  The police came to take a statement from me, but I lied and told them that I didn’t know who did this to me and that I didn’t see his face. I told them that I was attacked in the parking lot when I was coming out of the casino. After they took my statement Justin came back into the room carrying a large bouquet of roses and a big white teddy bear. Kissing me on the cheek he asked how I was doing.

  “I am fine.” I managed as I winced from the pain.

  “Your friends came when you were back in surgery.”

  I smiled.

  “They really love you.”

  “I know.” I whispered, “I see that you went to the gift shop.” I said looking at the teddy bear.

  “I know how much you like stuffed animals. Jovanna, why were you at Harrah’s that night? Why did you lie about going with Santana?”

  I didn’t have words to say to him, but when I looked at the amount of worry in his blue eyes I started to cry.

  Justin took my hand in his and said, “Jovanna, my mother struggled with a gambling addiction that fueled her alcohol abuse but we got her through it so I know that I can help you get through this.”

  “A gambling addiction?” I wondered to myself.

  “I know the signs, missing jewelry and your maxed out credit card. At first I thought that you were having an affair, but when they said that you were found at Harrah’s Casino it began to make sense to me.”

  The tears flowed down my face even harder.

  “It is okay we are going to get through this because I love you, but Jovanna I cannot take you keeping secrets from me any longer. I need you to promise me that the lies and the secrets are over.”

  Chad had his money and was most likely halfway back to Memphis by now so I didn’t have to worry about my secret getting back to Justin so I made the promise of no more lies and I was grateful not to have to worry about my well-hidden secret coming out of the closet.

  38

  Santana

  A few days after our conversation at the hospital, Mike and I decided to take the kids to Incredible Pizza and to my surprise I actually had a terrific time playing around with them and talking to Mike. It wasn’t forced so the pressure was off of me to try to make us seem like a picture perfect family.

  On the drive home, Mya wanted to know why they were staying at their grandparent’s house instead of at home and I told them that I just need some alone time.

  “Does that mean that you don’t want us any more mommy?” she cried.

  “No I will always want you Mya, it just means that mommy has a lot of pressure on her and I just needed a break.” I said.

  “Just like you take a time out from playing, grown-ups need a time out from time-to-time as well.” Mike said softly.

  Malik was too busy texting while listening to his iPod to even hear what we were talking about.

  “I had a great time tonight.” I smiled.

  “Yeah, me too. Do you mind if I drop the kids off first so that they can get showered and settled in for the night?” Mike asked.

  “Go right ahead.” I said, “I want to say hi to mom and dad anyway.”

  “Mom hasn’t been feeling too well lately.”

  “Oh, has she been to the doctor?”

  “Yes, but I don’t think that it was good news.”

  “Is the cancer back?”

  Mike shook his head yes as he looked in the rearview mirror at our sleeping daughter and oblivious son. “This time it is more aggressive.”

  I put my hand to my mouth, “I’m sorry to hear that.”

  “Please don’t mention it you know how private my parents can be.”

  Mike turned up
the music as we rode to his parents’ house. His mother was happy to see us together again, but the smile on her face didn’t hide the sick that was ravaging through her body.

  “It is good to see you.”

  “Hi mom.” I said hugging her tightly.

  “Well, well, well…” Mike’s father said as he came into the foyer of the large house. “It is good seeing the two of you together as a family, as God intended it.”

  “Hey dad.” I hugged him while ignoring the last comment.

  “Dad, I am going to put Mya in bed.” Mike said to his father as he carried Mya upstairs, “Malik come on and get in the shower.”

  I embraced my teenaged son and said, “I miss you baby.”

  “I miss you too mom.” He said without looking up from his important text message.

  “Boys and their toys.” Mike’s mother said as we walked into the formal sitting room, “How are things?”

  “Things are going okay.”

  “Now you know that I don’t normally get busy in you and Mike’s business, but this separation scares me Santana. I love you like a daughter, but Mike is my son and I don’t want to see him get hurt.”

  Shocked by her statement I said, “I don’t intend to hurt Mike; we are just working through some problems.”

  “Work through them together not apart.” Mike’s father spoke. “Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamor, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice. And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.”

  Mike walked into the room and cleared his throat, “Mya is in bed and Malik is in the shower; are you ready to go?” he asked me.

  “I remember when I first met you; I think that you were fifteen years-old and you were just a shy pretty little thing, but I knew it then that my son had found his wife.” Mike’s father spoke, “You did good son, now keep doing good and you two work this mess between you out.”

  Mike’s eyes went to mine.

  “I have ten brothers and two sisters and we were all married and stayed married until death did a few of them part. Mike you and Santana made a promise before God, honor that promise son.”

  “We are trying dad.” Mike said.

  “Good night mom and dad it was nice seeing you again.” I said nervously as I stood to leave.

  “It was nice to see you too; hopefully the next time we see one another it will be on better terms.” His mother said as she hugged me. “Good night.”

  It was hard going home alone, but I needed more time to sort out what it was that I was doing with Tabitha and what it is that I wanted for myself.

  “I need to run in and grab a few suits.” Mike said when we pulled up to our house.

  “Mike you don’t have to explain it to me; this is your house too.”

  When we got into the house I walked into the kitchen while he went to the bedroom that we once shared and got a few suits out of the closet. I’d poured myself a glass of wine and was standing by the island by the time that he came back down stairs.

  “Since when did you start drinking wine?” he asked.

  “I have always enjoyed a glass of Moscato or Pinot Noir, Mike.” I answered.

  “Well we never kept it in the house.”

  I changed the subject, “I had a nice time tonight; we haven’t laughed that much in a long time.”

  “We really miss you Santana.” Mike walked over to me with hunger in his brown eyes, “I have really missed you.”

  “Mike I…”

  Before I could get anything out he pulled me to him and kissed me with the appetite of a starved man and the passion of a lustful mind. Startled, I dropped the glass of Moscato sending it crashing onto the ceramic tile floor where it shattered at our feet. Normally Mike would’ve been livid and like a mad man rushed to clean the broken glass up, but tonight he was someone else. Releasing me for only a moment Mike looked deep into my eyes then down at the buttons on my cashmere cardigan. With a sweep of his hand he grabbed the sweater and ripped it open exposing a laced pink tank top underneath. Kissing my neck and collarbone Mike began working on my trousers as he fumbled with the belt and buttons. I hadn’t seen Mike behave this way in such a long time, but I did not stop him nor slow him down.

  Once inside of my pants Mike took his fingers and played with my freshly shaved pussy and smiled. Seeing my usually sedate husband behave this way turned me on; I began undressing while he took off his shirt and pants. We looked like two horny teenagers. Kissing my mouth Mike pushed me against the kitchen island lifting me on top of it where I wrapped my long legs around his body. He dipped low and began sucking my clit first softly then with aggression. With my nails entangled in his curly hair I threw my head back as I could no longer hold in the cries of pain and pleasure that spilled out of my mouth. His dick was as hard as concrete as he slammed into my body vehemently. I backed up, but he wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me back to him forcing me to take each and every inch of his manhood and each and every thrust of his dick.

  “Oh God!” I screamed, “I am about to come!”

  “Come for me baby!” Mike moaned as he pounded my body.

  Closing my eyes I could see every color of the rainbow, hear every sound in the heavens and taste the sweet sweat that poured down my forehead onto my lips. I gripped his back as the muscles in my thighs and arms contracted, but that didn’t stop him he only dug deeper. I couldn’t understand the sensations that were running from my spine to each of my limbs, but I didn’t care. Mike burrowed deep inside of me holding my legs around his body; he looked at me like a mad dog in heat as he geared up to explode inside of my body sending his own body into a convulsion.

  “Shit Santana!” he screamed. “I love you!”

  We laid on the cold, hard floor intertwined in each other’s arms, surrounded by articles of clothing with shallow breaths, pounding hearts and sweaty brows. Looking at me with softness in his eyes my husband smiled and began playing connect the dots with the light freckles that made a path across the face like he has done so many times before. We didn’t speak because there was nothing that needed to be said.

  The following day at the office I received a phone call from the company’s bank regarding my Visa card. The representative said that they were concerned by unusual purchases on my account and they needed to see if they were valid.

  “Five-hundred, thirty-two dollars and fifteen cents was spent at Saks Fifth Avenue in Frontenac, three-hundred, ninety six dollars and nine cents at BCBG also in Frontenac.” He said.

  My mouth hit the floor when he told me the charges for hotels and restaurants that have been made over the past few days. I couldn’t believe that I was so naive as to trust Tabitha with my credit card. Then I remembered the mysterious phone call that I’d gotten a few months before and how I should have taken that as a que to get out.

  After telling the representative that I lost my credit card and to deactivate it I went to Tabitha’s desk, but she was gone. Furious I walked back into my own office and dialed her cell phone, but I got her voicemail. I should have known better. Mike wanted us to have lunch together so as I was heading out to meet him for lunch I put a sticky note on her computer screen:

  We need to talk.

  “What’s wrong, you seem agitated.” Mike asked.

  “I lost the company credit card.” I answered.

  “Oh, well have them deactivate it until you find it. I’m sure that it is at home. Maybe it is on the kitchen floor.” He winked.

  I smiled.

  “I miss you so much Santana.” He said holding my hand.

  I smiled once more.

  “These past few days have been so hard on me and on the kids. I want us to work this out and I want our family back, but I just can’t take the secrets any longer.”

  “Mike I understand all of that, but you have to understand that I can’t take feeling unwanted and unloved either.”

  “I do love you Santan
a.”

  “You don’t show it.”

  Sighing Mike admitted, “I guess that I settled into the comfort zone and was kind of ignoring you lately, but baby I promise you that will change. Just be honest and tell me that you are not seeing another man behind my back.”

  I looked him in his pleading eyes and said, “I swear that there is no other man.” In my mind it was not a lie because Tabitha was not a man.

  “What about the Visa bill?”

  “I am sorry; I’ve been shopping and going out to eat a lot lately. I guess that I have been running from our problems.”

  “Baby there shouldn’t be anything that we can’t discuss with one another.”

  “I know, but I am tired of arguing.”

  “I am sorry for my part in this whole thing, but you are my life and I want to make this work. I am in this for life.”

  Out of the corner of my eye I saw Tabitha come into the restaurant holding hands and laughing with another woman. When she saw me looking at her, she whispered something to the woman then made her way over to our table, but not before letting go of her hand.

  “Hello.” She smiled, “Hi Mike it’s nice seeing you again.”

  Trying to hide my fury I forced a fake smile and said, “Fancy seeing you here.” As my eyes darted from her to her older friend then back to Tabitha again.

  “My friend asked me out to lunch and you know that I am not one to turn down a free meal.”

  Mike looked at Tabitha with contempt.

  “Yeah I know how you are.” I said dryly.

  Tabitha’s eyes went from Mike then back to me in an uncomfortable silence, “Well I guess that I will see you back at the office.”

  “Is she with that woman?” Mike asked in disgust as he looked at Tabitha and her friend snuggle at their booth.

  “I guess.”

  “I can’t stand to watch it.” He said beckoning the waiter for the check.

  “Watch what Mike?”

  “I can’t understand why a woman would turn to another woman or a man to turn to another man. It’s ungodly and disgusting.”