Delphi Complete Works of O. Henry

by O. Henry

  Truly, he was not pleasing to the sight. He was a bent, ungainly old man, with a face screwed to one side and wrinkled like a dry prune. The red shirt, which proclaimed his enlistment into the ranks, was a misfit, being the outer husk of a leviathan corporal who had died some time before. This garment hung upon Bulger in folds. His old brown cap was always pulled down over one eye. These and his wabbling gait gave him the appearance of some great simian, captured and imperfectly educated in pedestrian and musical manoeuvres.

  The thoughtless boys and undeveloped men who gathered about the street services of the Army badgered Bulger incessantly. They called upon him to give oral testimony to his conversion, and criticized the technique and style of his drum performance. But the old man paid no attention whatever to their jeers. He rarely spoke to any one except when, on coming and going, he gruffly saluted his comrades.

  The sergeant had met many odd characters, and knew how to study them. He allowed the recruit to have his own silent way for a time. Every evening Bulger appeared at the hall, marched up the street with the squad and hack again. Then he would place his drum in the corner where ‘t belonged, and sit upon the last bench in the rear until the hall meeting was concluded.

  But one night the sergeant followed the old man outside, and laid his hand upon his shoulder. “Comrade,” he said, “is it well with you?”

  “Not yet, sergeant,” said Bulger. “ I’m only tryin’. I’m glad you come outside. I’ve been wantin’ to ask you: I)o you believe the Lord would take a man in if he come to Him late like — kind of a last resort, you know? Say a man who’d lost everything — home and property and friends and health. Wouldn’t it look mean to wait till then and try to come?”

  “Bless His name — no!” said the sergeant. “Come ye that are heavy laden; that’s what He says. The poorer, the more miserable, the more unfortunate — the greater His love and forgiveness.”

  “Yes, I’m poor,” said Bulger. “Awful poor and miserable. You know when I can think best, sergeant? It’s when I’m heating the drum. Other times there’s a kind of muddled roarin’ in my head. The drum seems to kind of soothe and calm it. There’s a thing I’m tryin’ to study out, but I ain’t made it yet.”

  “Do you pray, comrade?” asked the sergeant.

  “No, 1 don’t,” said Bulger. “ What’d be the use? I know where the hitch is. Don’t it say somewhere lor a man to give up his own family or friends and serve the Lord?”

  ‘“If they stand in his way; not otherwise.”

  I’ve got no family,” continued the old man, “nor no friends — but one. And that one is what’s driven me to ruin.”

  “Free yourself!” cried the sergeant. “He is no friend, but an enemy who stands between you and salvation.”

  “No,” answered Bulger, emphatically, “no enemy. The best friend I ever had.”

  “But you sav he’s driven vou to rum!”

  The old man chuckled dryly:

  “And keeps me in rags and livin’ on scraps and sleepin’ like a dog in a patched-up kennel. And yet I never had a better friend. You don’t understand, sergeant. You lose all your friends but the best one, and then you’ll know how to hold on to the last one.”

  “Do you drmk, comrade?” asked the sergeant.

  “Not a drop m twenty years,” Bulger replied. The sergeant was puzzled.

  “If this friend stands hetween you and your soul’s peace, give him up,” was all he could find to say.

  “ I can’t — now,” said the old man, dropping into a fretful whine. “But you just let me keep on beating the drum, sergeant, and maybe I will some time. I’m a-tryin”. Sometimes I come so near thinkin” it out that a dozen more licks on the drum would settle it. I get mighty nigh to the point, and rhen I have to quit. You’ll give me more time, won’t you, sergeant?”

  “All you want, and God hless you, comrade. Pound away until you hit the right note.”

  Afterward the sergeant would often call to Bulger: “Tme, comrade! Knocked that friend of yours out yet?’ The answer was always unsatisfactory.

  One night at a street corner the sergeant prayed loudly that a certain struggling comrade might he parted Irom an enemy who was leading him astray under the guise of friendship Bulger, in sudden and plainly evident alarm, immediately turned his drum over to a fellow volunteer, and shuffled rapidly away down the street. The next night he was back again at his post, without any explanation of his strange behaviour.

  The sergeant wondered what it all meant, and took occasion to question the old man more closely as to the influence that was retarding the peace his soul seemed to crave. But Bulger carefully avoided particularizing.

  “ It’s my own fight,” he said. “ I’ve got to think it out myself. Nobody else don’t understand.”

  The winter of 1892 was a memorable one in the South. The cold was almost unprecedented, and snow fell many inches deep where it had rarely whitened the ground before. Much suffering resulted among the poor, who had not anticipated the rigorous season. The litde squad of Salvationists found more distress then they could relieve.

  Charity in that town, while swift and liberal, lacked organization. Want, in that balmy and productive climate, existed only in sporadic cases, and these were nearly always quietly relieved by generous neighbours. But when some sudden disastrous onslaught of the elements — storm, tire or flood — occurred, the impoverished sufferers were often too slowly aided because system was lacking, and because charity was called upon too seldom to become a habit. At such times the Salvation Army was very useful. Its soldiers went down into alleys and byways to rescue those who, unused to extreme want, had never learned to beg.

  At the end of three weeks of hard freezing a level foot of snow fell. Hunger and cold struck the improvident, and a hundred women, children and old men were gathered into the Army’s quarters to be warmed and fed. Each day the blue-uniformed soldiers slipped in and out of the stores and offices of the town, gathering pennies and dimes and quarters to buy food for the. starving. And in and out of private houses the Salvationists went with baskets of food and clothing, while day by day the mercury still crouched among the tens and twenties.

  Alas! business, that scapegoat, was dull. The dimes and quarters came more reluctantly from tills that jingled not when they were opened. Yet in the big hall of the Army the stove was kept red-hot, and upon the long table, set in the rear, could always be found at. least coffee and bread and cheese. The sergeant and i-he squad fought valiantly. At last the money on hand was all gone, and the daily collections were diminished to a variable sum, inadequate to the needs of the dependents of the Army.

  Christmas was near at hand. There were fifty children in the hall, and many more outside, to whom that season brought no joy beyond what was brought by the Army. None of these little pensioners had thus far lacked necessary comforts, and they had already begun to chatter of the tree — that one bright vision in the sober monotony of the year. Never since the Army first came had it. failed to provide a tree and gifts for the children.

  The sergeant was troubled. He knew that an announcement of “no tree” would grieve the hearts under those thin cotton dresses and ragged jackets more than would stress of storm or scanty diet; and yet there was not money enough to meet the daily demands for food and fuel.

  On the night of December the 20th the sergeant decided to announce that there could be no Christmas tree: it seemed unfair to allow the waxing anticipation of the children to reach too great a height.

  The evening was colder, and the still deep snow was made deeper by another heavy tail swept upon the wings of a fierce and shrill- voiced northern gale. The sergeant, with sodden boots and reddened countenance, entered the hall at nightfall, and removed his threadbare overcoat. Soon afterward the rest of the faithful squad drifted in, the women heavily shawled, the men stamping their snow-crusted feet loudly upon the steep stairs. After the slender supper of cold meat, beans, bread, and coffee had been finished all joined in a short service of
song and prayer, according to their daily habit.

  Far back in the shadow sat Bulger. For weeks his ears had been deprived of that aid to thought, the booming of the big bass drum. His wrinkled face wore an expression of gloomy perplexity. The Army had been too busy for the regular services and parades. The silent drum, the banners, and the cornets were stored in a little room at the top of the stairway.

  Bulger came to the hall every night and ate supper with the others. In such weather work of the kind that the old man usually did was not to be had, and he was bidden to share the benefits conferred upon the other unfortunates. He always left early, and it was surmised that he passed the nights in his patchwork hut, that structure being waterproof and weathertight beyond the promise of its outward appearance. Of late the sergeant had had no time to bestow upon the old man.

  At seven o’clock the sergeant stood up and rapped upon the table with a lump of coal. When the room became still he began his talk, that rambled off into a halting discourse quite unlike his usual positive and direct speeches. The children had gathered about their friend in a ragged, wriggling, and wide-a-wake circle. Most of them had seen that fresh, ruddy countenance of his emerge, at the twelve-stroke of a night of splendour, from the whiskered mask of a magnificent Santa Claus. They knew now that he was going to speak of the Christmas tree.

  They tiptoed and listened, flushed with, a hopeful and eager awe. The sergeant saw it, frowrned, and swallowed hard. Continuing, he planted the sting of disappointment in each expectant little bosom, and watched the light fade from their eyes.

  There was to be no tree. Renunciation was no new thing to them; they had been born to it. Still a few little ones in whom hope died hard sobbed aloud, and wan, wretched mothers tried to hush and console them. A kind of voiceless wail went among them, scarcely a protest, rather the ghost of a lament for the childhood’s pleasures they had never known. The sergeant sat down and figured cheerlessly with the stump of a pencil upon the blank border of a newspaper.

  Bulger rose and shuffled out of the room without ceremony, as was his custom. He was heard fumbling in the little room in the hallway, and suddenly a thunderous roar broke out, filling the whole building with its booming din. The sergeant started, and then laughed as if his nerves welcomed the diversion.

  “It’s only Comrade Bulger,” he said, “doing a little thinking in his own quiet way.”

  The norther rattled the windows and shrieked around the corners. The sergeant heaped more coa! into the stove. The increase of that cutting wind bore the cold promise of days, perhaps weeks, of hard times to come. The children were slowly recovering the sad philosophy out of which the deceptive hope of one bright day had enticed them. The women were arranging things for the night; preparing to draw the long curtain across the width of the hall, separating the children’s quarters and theirs from those of the men.

  About eight o’clock the sergeant had seen that all was shipshape; and was wrapping his woolen comforter around his neck, ready for his cold journey homeward, when footsteps were heard upon the stairway. The door opened, and Bulger came in covered with snow like Santa Claus, and as red of face, hut otherwise much unlike the jolly Christmas saint.

  The old man shambled down the hall to where the sergeant stood, drew a wet, earth-soiled bag from under his coat, and laid it upon the table. “Open it,” he said, and motioned to the sergeant.

  That cheery official obeyed with an indulgent smile. He seized the bottom of the bag, turned it up, and stood, with his smile turned to a gape of amazement, gazing at a heap of gold and silver coin that rolled upon the table.

  “Count it,” said Bulger.!’he jingling of the money and wonder at its source had produced a profound silence in the room. For a time nothing could be heard but the howling of the wind and the chink of the coins as the sergeant slowly laid them in little separate piles.

  “Six hundred,” said the sergeant, and stopped to clear his throat, “six hundred and twenty-three dollars and eighty-five cents!”

  “Eighty,” said Bulger. “Mistake of five cents. I’ve thought it out at last, sergeant, and I’ve give up that friend I told you about. That’s him — dollars and cents. The boys was right when they said 1 was a miser. Take it, sergeant, and spend it the best way for them that needs it, not forgettin’ a tree for the young ‘uns, and”

  “Hallelujah!” cried the sergeant. “And a new bass drum,” concluded Bulger.

  And then the sergeant made another speech

  A PROFESSIONAL SECRET

  THE STORY OF A MAID MADE OVER

  Dr. Satterfield prince physician to the leisure class, looked at his watch. Jt indicated five minutes to twelve. At the stroke of the hour would expire the morning term set apart for the reception of his patients in his handsome office apartments. And then the young woman attendant ushered in from the waiting-room the last unit of the wealthy and fashionable gathering that had come to patronize his skill.

  Dr. Prince turned, his watch still in hand, his manner courteous, but seeming to invite promptness and brevity in the :nterview. The last patient was a middle-aged lady, richly dressed, with an amiable and placid face. When she spoke her voice revealed the drawling, musical slur and intonation of the South. She had come, she leisurely explained, to bespeak the services of Dr. Prince in the case of her daughter, who was possessed of a most mysterious affliction. And then, femininely, she proceeded to exhaustively diagnose the affliction, informing the physician with a calm certitude of its origin and nature.

  The diagnosis advanced by the lady — Mrs. Galloway R.ankin — was one so marvelously strange and singular in its conception that Dr. Prince, accustomed as he was to the conceits and vagaries of wealthy malingerers, was actually dumfounded. The fol lowing is the matter of Mrs. Rankin’s statement, briefly reported: She — Mrs. Rankin — was of an old Kentucky family, the Bealls. Between the Bealls and another historic house — the Rankins — had been waged for nearly a century one of the fiercest and most sanguinary feuds within the history of the State. Each generation had kept alive both the hate and the warfare, until at length it was said that Nature began to take cognizance of the sentiment and Bealls and Rankms were born upon earth as antagonistic toward each other as cats and dogs. So, for four generations the war had waged, and the mountains were dotted with tombstones of both families. At last, for lack of fuel to feed upon, the feud expired with only one direct descendant of the Bealls and one of the Rankins remaining —

  Evalina Beall, aged nineteen, and Galloway Rankin, aged twenty-five. The last mortal shot in the feud was fired by Cupid. The two survivors met, became immediately and mutually enamoured, and a miracle transpired on Kentucky soil — a Rankin wedded a Beall.

  Interposed, and ‘rrelevant to the story, was the information that coal mines had been discovered later on the Rankin lands, and now the Galloway Rankins were to be computed among the millionaries.

  All that was long enough ago for there to be now a daughter, twenty years of age — Miss Annabel Rankm — for whose relief the services of Dr. Prince was petitioned.

  Then followed, in Mrs. Rankin’s statement, a description of the mysterious, though by her readily accounted for, affliction.

  It seemed that there was a peculiar difficulty in the young lady’s powTers of locomotion. In wralking, a process requiring a coordination and unanimity of the functions — Dr. Prince, said Mrs. Rankin, would understand and admit the non-existence of a necessity for anatomical specification — there persisted a stubborn opposition, a most contrary and counteracting antagonism. In those successively progressive and generally unconsciously automatic movements necessary to proper locomotion, there was a violent lack of harmony and mutuality. To give an instance cited by Mrs. Rankin — if Miss Annabel desired to ascend a stairway, one foot would be easily advanced to the step above, but instead of aiding and abetting its fellow, the other would at once proceed to start downstairs. By a strong physical and mental effort the young lady could walk fairly well for a short distance but s
uddenly the rebellious entities would become uncontrollable, and she would be compelled to turn undesirable corners, to enter impossible doorways, to dance, snuffle, sidestep and perform other undignified and distressing evolutions.

  After setting forth these lamentable symptoms, Mrs. Rankin emphatically asserted her belief that the affliction was the result of heredity — of the union between the naturally opposing and contrary Beall and Rankin elements. She believed that the inherited spirit of the ancient feud had taken on physical manifestations, exhibiting them in the person of the unfortunate outcome of the union of opposites. That in Miss Annabel Rankin was warring the imperishable antipathy of the two families. In other words, that one of Miss Rankin’s — that is to say, that when Miss Rattkin took a step it was a Beall step, and the next one was dominated by the bequeathed opposition of the Rankms.

  Doctor Prince received the communication with his usual grave, professional attention, and promised to call the next day at ten to inspect the patient.

  Promptly at the hour his electric runabout turned into the line of stylish autos and hansoms that wait along the pavements before the most expensive hostelry on American soil.