Jordan's Return

by Samantha Chase

  “Oh,” she whispered. “I see.” She felt the rejection pierce her heart as she stared at the floor.

  He stopped in front of her and reached down to cup her face in his hands. “I’m concerned about their mom, too,” he said as he bent forward and placed a gentle, featherlight kiss on her cheek.

  Jordan sighed and leaned in to him. She was no longer concerned with the smell of fish or what she was supposed to do. She just wanted to be near him, to touch him, and to feel him touch her. As his mouth moved toward hers, she remembered why they couldn’t do this.

  Friends, dammit, they were just going to be friends, she chanted in her head. She awkwardly cleared her throat. “What about Kelly?” she asked as she stepped back and nervously smoothed her hair.

  “What about her?” he asked, confusion written all over his face as his brows furrowed together.

  “You spent the weekend with her and now you’re here like this with me. Correct me if I’m wrong, but isn’t that the exact same reason we broke up all those years ago, Rob? You were spreading yourself around a little too much?” Sure, it was a childish statement and totally went against her whole commitment to letting the past go, but she had to protect herself.

  There were many responses she had expected.

  Laughter was not one of them. His hearty amusement made her that much angrier.

  “That’s priceless, Jordan! Kelly is my cousin’s fiancée. Why would you think she’s my girlfriend?”

  She wished a giant hole would open up in the floor and just swallow her. Her face must have been twenty-seven shades of red. “Well, like I, um…said, you…you went away with her for the weekend, so I just assumed…”

  He chuckled again. “She and my cousin are getting married next month and I designed their new home. He’s a builder, so we spent the weekend working on the house to get it done in time. Honest.” He reached out and pulled her into his arms, planting a kiss firmly on her lips. There was nothing romantic about it at all and as soon as it started, it was over. He released her and went back to working on the fish.

  “So, should I wait to cut off the heads until the boys are here to watch?” he asked with a wicked grin.

  * * *

  Dinner was an early and boisterous affair. After Rob had cleaned and filleted all the fish, he set about frying them while Jordan prepared rice pilaf, salad, and biscuits. Jake and Joseph had watched, full of pride, as their day’s work was being prepared. It was a real family effort.

  Tall fishing tales were thrown at Jordan from every angle. Her boys, who had never fished before in their young lives, were suddenly little Hemingways. They talked and laughed throughout the meal. Rob sat back and realized this was what he wanted: to be part of a family. This family.

  They were all so much at ease with each other, and the sounds of childish laughter and the look of pure joy on Jordan’s face as she listened to her sons’ stories caused his gut to clench. It filled him with happiness that he had contributed to the fun they were having tonight.

  Jordan’s comments from earlier in the day came back to haunt him. “We were fine before you came along, and we’ll continue to be fine after we leave.” He frowned. He didn’t want them to be fine when they left. Well, that wasn’t completely true; he didn’t wish them any ill will, but he didn’t want them to leave.

  Period. Time was going by too quickly as it was and he knew he hadn’t had his fill of being with them yet. He doubted that he ever would.

  As the boys rose to begin cleaning up, Joseph’s voice brought Rob back into the present. “Hey, Mom? Do you think we can go to Kings Dominion this weekend?” The brown eyes that mirrored his mother’s looked at her expectantly. “It’s not that far from here and they’re only open on the weekends. Maybe it won’t be so crowded since the season is over.”

  “Joe, we talked about this before we came here, remember? I’m just not up to it this year, baby. I’m sorry.” Rob noticed both pairs of brown eyes were brimming with tears.

  “Yeah, I know.” Joseph sighed. “I’m sorry. I just thought now that we’ve been here a little while, maybe you were feeling better and might change your mind.” He slowly walked over to the sofa and quietly sat down.

  Jordan sat at the kitchen table and placed her face in her hands and sighed wearily. She hated this. She hated how her boys had to suffer because of her. Before the accident, she could run around at an amusement park, or anyplace else for that matter, all day long. Now, even the task of walking around a supermarket could cause her extreme fatigue and muscle aches.

  Though she was beginning to feel better, Jordan didn’t want to take the risk of overdoing it and hampering her recovery.

  Without looking up, she heard Rob murmur something to the boys and then heard the sound of footsteps heading down the hallway to their bedroom and the door closing. He came and sat next to Jordan and took both of her hands in his.

  “I’m sorry, Jordan. I’m afraid that was my fault,” he confessed as he ran his thumbs over her knuckles. “We were talking while out on the boat today and they mentioned wanting to go to the park. I told them how great it was and I got them all wound up about it. I really had no idea this was a topic you and the boys had already discussed. I wasn’t thinking. I’m sorry.”

  “It’s not your fault, Rob. You’d think by staying close to the park that we’d go, but there never seems to be the time.” She smiled weakly at him, reveling in the feel of his strong hands wrapped around hers. She wanted to draw on that strength, have it fill her and take all her pain away.

  That thought nearly stopped her breath; if just having him touch her hands gave her such a strong reaction, how was she ever going to come to grips with just being friends? Who was she kidding—now that she knew Kelly wasn’t a threat, the thought of being just friends with Rob was completely unappealing.

  She looked at his face and saw he was waiting for her to continue. “The thing is, I get tired so easily still and I just can’t do all the things they want me to. Believe it or not, up until about six weeks ago, I was still using a cane to get around.”

  Rob dropped her hands and kicked the chair out from under him. He paced the length of the kitchen with a scowl on his face. Jordan eyed him hesitantly. She had never in all her life seen Rob when he was angry. She remembered Eric’s anger well. He had directed it at her often enough during their marriage and even well into their divorce. She silently prayed what she was about to witness wouldn’t be anything like what she’d experienced in the past.

  “Jordan,” he snapped but then caught himself. He took a moment to breathe and calm himself down before beginning again. “Jordan, I am just sick inside when I think about what you and the boys have gone through. I know I can’t erase any of it, but dammit, it breaks my heart to see them look at you that way!”

  Jordan finally let the tears she was fighting back fall. She knew exactly what he meant. “It’s not easy for me either, Rob,” she sobbed. “I have to live with the bad decisions I’ve made every day, and unfortunately, my children have to pay the price for them. A normal woman would have taken her children someplace fun for a vacation, but because of what I am now, we have to take quiet vacations where they have to look after me!” As her tears freely flowed, Rob stopped his pacing and came to kneel down beside her.

  “Look,” he said as he reached up and wiped the tears from her face with his thumbs. “Let me do this for them. Please.”

  “Do what?” She sniffled.

  “I want to take us all away for the weekend.” He stopped and waited for her refusal. When she stared at him with wide eyes and a watery grin, he went on. “We’ll leave on Friday night and drive up. We’ll get a hotel room or a suite someplace, and we’ll spend all day Saturday at Kings Dominion and then spend part of the day Sunday relaxing around the hotel before coming home.”

  Home. Oh, how he would love to have a home with Jordan and the boys that
they all could come back to and live in together.

  Calm down there, Romeo. You’re going all soft and emotional and getting way ahead of yourself. Get a grip!

  “Rob,” she began, “I can’t. I—”

  “Shh. You can go at your own pace. I’ll do all the running around. You can take as many breaks as you like—sit down in the shade and enjoy the view, have a snack, whatever you want. The boys will get to enjoy the rides, and you can sit back knowing they are having a good time.” Rob let that scenario play through Jordan’s mind for a moment before asking, “What do you think?”

  “That’s far too much, Rob,” she said and reached up to touch his face. The fact that this man wanted to do something nice for her and the boys touched her more than anything else in the world could have. It had been so long since she’d known this type of kindness—no, tenderness from someone, and she wasn’t sure how to respond.

  “It’s not too much, Jordan. I want to do this for you and the boys. Trust me. It’ll be fun. Come on. What do you say?” His eyes were sweet and pleading, and Jordan would have given him anything in that moment. Staring deeply into his eyes, she knew she was lost.

  “I say you are the sweetest man I’ve ever known.” She leaned in and kissed him briefly on the lips, only meaning to express gratitude, but at the initial contact, she realized it wasn’t enough.

  Rob still held her face in his hands and Jordan reached up to do the same to his as they tasted and teased each other’s lips with shy remembrance. They nipped at each other, both painfully holding back.

  Jordan sighed and leaned in to him, and all Rob’s restraint left.

  He slanted his mouth over hers again and again, and when he gently probed at her soft lips with his tongue, she willingly opened for him and let out a soft cry of pleasure.

  And then found herself alone. Rob stood and released her while he caught his breath. She feared she had disappointed him in some way. Maybe she had misread the signals, but she thought he wanted her as much as she wanted him. Placing her face in her hands, she cringed with embarrassment. And then he was back at her side.

  “Jordan? I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to get so carried away. I…I promise I won’t let that happen again. I’m not expecting anything from you in return for this weekend. That’s not why I asked, so please relax. I promise to keep my hands to myself.” There was a trace of desperation in his voice that caused Jordan’s head to snap up. Her eyes were full of questions.

  “I don’t think I understand.”

  Looking down at the ground because he couldn’t bring himself to look her in the eye, he spoke. “I know you’ve just been through a hellish few months and you’re here to recover, and I go and practically attack you. I’m so sorry. I don’t want you to worry about me pouncing. I promise to control myself and…” He stopped speaking at the sound of her soft laughter. “What’s so funny?”

  “Pouncing?” she laughed. “I think we’d have to admit that we both pounced. You have nothing to be sorry for. I just thought you were regretting kissing me because…well…”

  “What, Jordan?”

  “Because you didn’t enjoy it,” she admitted in a quiet voice.

  She couldn’t bring herself to look at him, either, but he left her no choice. Using his index finger, Rob lifted her chin so she was forced to meet his gaze.

  “Oh, I enjoyed it,” he said softly as he inched closer to her. “I enjoyed it very much.” His lips touched hers briefly. “In fact, I’ll probably dream about it for a very long time.”

  Unfortunately, they couldn’t let it go any further than that. Noises were drifting down the hallway from the boys’ room, and they both knew this would lead them nowhere for right now.

  Resting her forehead on his, she asked, “Are you sure you really want to do this? An entire weekend with my children has been known to take down many brave adults.”

  Rob stood and took her in his arms and held her close. She felt so good, and he just absorbed the sensations before speaking. “I’ll make all the arrangements,” he stated. “Besides,” he added playfully, “it isn’t fair for them to get stuck going to a theme park with a girl who doesn’t fully appreciate all the scary rides.” He winked at her and stepped away.

  “Oh, I see. So this isn’t really about helping me out. This is to spare Joseph and Jake the embarrassment of having a chicken for a mom, is that it? The fact that you are just a big kid who enjoys thrill rides is just a bonus, right?”

  “Absolutely,” he said as he headed down the hall to talk to the boys, leaving Jordan standing in the kitchen, smiling at his retreating form.

  Chapter 7

  It was a productive week for the Manning trio. Jordan was truly feeling stronger, and the boys were so thrilled about their upcoming weekend that they were on their best behavior at all times. Jordan figured if she’d made them a meal like liver and onions, they would have eaten it, complimented her on it, and asked for seconds, just to keep her happy and not rock the boat.

  In preparation for the weekend, Jordan had begun taking short walks around the neighborhood several times a day. She didn’t explain to the boys what they were doing or, rather, why they were doing it; she used the excuse of them needing to be outside, enjoying the fresh air, for their daily jaunts.

  In truth, Jordan knew these little walks weren’t going to suddenly make her able to keep up with Rob and the boys while touring the theme park, but by exercising her body like this, she’d speed up her recovery. She didn’t want anyone worrying about her at the end of the day, when their focus should be on how much fun they’d had.

  When Friday finally rolled around, they were all about ready to burst. The boys woke Jordan up at the crack of dawn to help them pack, even though they weren’t leaving until after dinner. She indulged them mainly because she knew going back to sleep was impossible and it was something to do to pass the time.

  While they were sat around the breakfast table, she stared sleepily at her two sons. Slouched to the side with her head resting in the palm of her hand, she asked, “Why exactly are we up so darn early?”

  “We’re too excited to sleep!” Jake said, his smile wide, his eyes twinkling.

  “I can’t believe we are finally getting to go to Kings Dominion. Rob is the best!”

  “Yes, he is.” Jordan nodded around a yawn as she reached for her coffee and realized she was going to have to do everything within her power today to keep them all occupied until it was time to go.

  After breakfast, she made them clean around the house while she packed, and even talked them into a walk on the beach for a picnic lunch. The distraction was as much for her benefit as theirs. Jordan was finding it hard to keep her own anticipation in check. The only difference was that she didn’t want to let on to the boys how excited she was. What would they think if she were to tell them she was excited about going? Would they think about it on their level—that she was excited about seeing the park? Jake probably would. Joseph, who was so intuitive, would probably realize she was excited because of Rob.

  They had never discussed Jordan dating, and in truth, she was afraid of how they’d react to having a man back in their lives full-time. She knew they loved having Rob around, but they knew it was temporary. Had Eric damaged their view on having a father figure in their lives? It was a topic Jordan knew would have to be discussed eventually, but she was unsure if she wanted to face that right now. Now, as they were about to embark on a fun weekend away, was not the time. First she’d like to have time with Rob to explore a little more of what was going on with the two of them.

  But what if they didn’t want her to get involved with anyone? She had made a life for them, just the three of them. Perhaps they would resent someone joining their family. It was too much to deal with on top of this weekend, so Jordan decided to push all thoughts of it aside until it simply had to be dealt with.

  It was nearing two in
the afternoon when they arrived back home covered in sand. Jordan had just sent them to get cleaned up and had collapsed on the sofa when Rob called.

  “Hi,” he said smoothly when Jordan answered the phone.

  “Hi, yourself,” she said softly. Since their dinner on Tuesday, they hadn’t seen each other but had spoken on the phone several times a day. Rob was catching up on work so he could be away for the weekend, and she found herself missing him while enjoying hearing his voice on the phone. Jordan longed to see him and was almost as excited as the boys at the prospect of spending the entire weekend with him.

  “Listen, don’t worry about cooking dinner tonight. I thought we could grab some pizza on the way out of town. Is that all right with you?”

  “Are you kidding? Not having to cook is what I live for on days like this!” she joked. “Although getting them involved in a complicated recipe would make a nice distraction at this point.”

  “Eager to leave, are they?” he chuckled.

  “We all are,” she said huskily, barely recognizing her own voice. She sighed into the phone and smiled again at the thought of being with Rob all weekend.

  His response told her he was thinking the same thing. “Mmm… You’re killing me, you realize that, don’t you?” he asked in a dark tone that held many promises.

  “Am I?” she teased.

  “Absolutely. It’s been torture not seeing you these last days. I’ve been dreaming of that kiss nonstop, Jordan.”

  She smiled. “I know exactly how you feel.” Now there was a double entendre if she’d ever heard one.

  “I’ll see you around five.” He hung up before she could reply.

  Jordan wasn’t sure what had gotten into her, but it felt really good to be so much at ease that they could flirt with one another. Though the thought of spending time with Rob was thrilling, it was also a little unnerving. The fact that the kids were going to be with them the entire time put to rest any notions of being alone with Rob. She wasn’t even sure Rob wanted to be alone with her. Was he getting as desperate as she at the thought of what it would be like to be alone together, to make love to one another again after all these years?