The Unknown Ajax

by Джорджетт Хейер

  “Nay, I didn’t know you’d company!” said the Major sheepishly.

  “I have not what you choose to call company! What the devil’s the matter with you, sir?”

  “Oh, there’s naught the matter!”Hugo hastened to assure him. “I just wondered whether my cousin was here!”

  “And now that you know that I am here, in what way can I serve you?” said Vincent, with smooth mockery.

  “Oh, it’s nothing of importance!” replied Hugo unconvincingly. He then became aware of Lieutenant Ottershaw, and exclaimed: “Ee, lad, I didn’t see it was you! What brings you here this late?”

  “Unlike you, sir, I am here on a matter of considerable importance!” replied Ottershaw curtly. “Perhaps you can—”

  “Eh, I’m sorry!” Hugo said, conscience-stricken. “I shouldn’t have come cluntering in on you!” Addressing himself to his grandfather, he added, apologetically: “I didn’t know there was anyone with you, sir! I’ll take myself off! Vincent lad, if you’re not throng, I’d be glad if you’d spare me a minute: got something to tell you! It’s just a private matter—nothing of consequence!”

  Vincent regarded him with a faint, supercilious smile. “A trifle castaway, coz? I should be interested to know what you can possibly have to say to me of a private nature, but it happens that I am, as you put it, extremely throng. Oh, don’t look so discouraged! I’ll join you presently—if I must!”

  “Nay, it won’t do presently: it’s what you might call urgent!” said the Major desperately.

  “Oh, for God’s sake—!” exploded Lord Darracott. “You’re disguised, sir! You can take yourself off—and if you’ll take this fellow whom you’re so devilish pleased to see with you I shall be obliged to you! And as for you, sir,” he said, rounding on Ottershaw, “I’ll see you damned before I’ll let you search my house!”

  “Search the house?” repeated the Major, his eyes round with astonishment. “Whatever do you want to do that for, lad?”

  “I have no wish to search the house!” said Ottershaw. “As I have already informed Lord Darracott, I am here to see Mr. Richmond Darracott, and that, sir, I am going to do! If his lordship doesn’t want his house to be searched, perhaps you can convince him that his only course is to produce Mr. Richmond! He seems strangely reluctant so to do, and I warn you—”

  “You impertinent jack-at-warts, how dare you—”

  “Nay, don’t start fratching!” begged the Major. He looked at Ottershaw, and shook his head. “You know, lad, you should know better than to come up here at this time of night! It’s no way to go about things. What’s more, you’ve no need to be in a pelter because our Richmond’s been playing tricks on you: I gave him a rare dressing, the night you and I watched him capering about in a sheet, and got the whole of it out of him, the young rascal! There’ll be no more of it: take my word for it! Eh, but you shouldn’t let yourself be hoaxed so easily, lad!”

  The Lieutenant, stiff as a ramrod, held out his warrant. “Perhaps, sir, you would like to read this! I am not here to enquire into any hoax!”

  Hugo chuckled, but took the warrant, and perused it, apparently deriving considerable enjoyment from it. But he shook his head again, as he handed it back to Ottershaw, and said: “You’ve made a bad mistake, lad, but if you’re set on making a reet cod’s head of yourself there’s nowt I can do to stop you!”

  During this exchange, Lord Darracott, glancing at Vincent, had encountered from Vincent’s hard eyes a steady look. It held his own suddenly arrested gaze perhaps for five seconds, and then dropped. Vincent drew out his snuffbox, tapped the lid and opened it, and delicately helped himself to a pinch, raising it to one sharp-cut nostril. As he inhaled, his eyes lifted again to his grandfather’s face, fleetingly this time, but still holding that curiously enigmatic expression. It was on the tip of Lord Darracott’s tongue to demand what the devil he meant by staring at him, but he refrained. It was unfamiliar, that hard stare, and it disturbed him; it was almost insolent, but Vincent was never insolent to him. His lordship, grasping that Vincent must be trying to convey a warning to him, but having as yet no clue to what it could be, curbed his tongue, and turned his angry gaze upon his heir.

  The Major, as everyone could see, was looking harassed, and rubbing his nose. He cast an eloquent glance at Vincent, who promptly responded to it, saying in a resigned tone: “Well, what is it, cousin? Don’t keep me in suspense any longer, I beg of you! It is quite obvious that you have something of great moment to disclose, but why yon are making such a mystery of it—dear me, how stupid of me! You appear to be so well-acquainted with Lieutenant—er—Ottershaw, is it not?—that it had not occurred to me that—”

  “Nay, I don’t mind him!”interrupted the Major ingenuously. “The thing is—” He gave a foolish laugh, and again rubbed his nose. “Eh, I’ve made a reet jumblement of it!” He turned once more to the Lieutenant, who was by this time almost quivering with rampant suspicion, and said confidentially: “Sithee, lad, the fact is, it’ll be a deal better if you shab off now, and come back tomorrow!”

  “For you, sir, no doubt! But I have no inten—”

  “It’ll be better for you too, think on!” remarked the Major, with a reflective grin. “You’ll get precious little sense out of our Richmond tonight, lad!” He added hastily, and with a wary glance at Mrs. Darracott: “At this hour of the night, I mean! Now, I’m not saying you can’t see him, because if you’ve a warrant to do it—”

  “Hugo!” uttered Mrs. Darracott, unable to contain herself another instant. “This—this person is accusing my son of being a—a common smuggler!”

  His grin broadened. “I’d give a plum to see him at it!” he said. “Nay, then, ma’am, don’t be nattered! The Lieutenant’s got a bee in his head, but I’m bound to say it was Richmond who put it there, so it’s not the Lieutenant you should be giving a scold to, but Richmond, the hey-go-mad young scamp that he is! If ever I met such a whisky-frisky, caper-witted lad! Anything for a bit of fun and gig! that’s his motto! You can’t but laugh at him, but one of these days he’ll find himself in the suds, and all for the sake of some silly hoax! Happen it wouldn’t do him any harm if he did get a bit of a fright, but we don’t want any more upsets—”

  “How dare you say Richmond is a scamp?” broke in Mrs. Darracott, bristling. “He is nothing of the sort! He has never given me a moment’s anxiety, and as for his being what you call a caper-witted, I have not the least guess what can have put such a notion into your head!”

  “No, dear aunt, of course you haven’t!” said Vincent. He sighed wearily. “I wondered if that was it. You have all my sympathy, Lieutenant—even though I must own I am devoutly thankful that you, and not I, have been his latest victim.”

  “Vincent!” she cried indignantly. “Of all the ill-natured, false things to say! You know very well—”

  “Be quiet!” interrupted his lordship harshly. “I will not endure any more of this nonsense! The boy doesn’t tell you what pranks he gets up to, ma’am, or me either! I’ve no doubt he plays all manner of tricks—all boys do so!—but let no one dare to tell me he has ever gone one inch beyond the line!” He glared at Ottershaw as he spoke, his breathing a little quickened, his face very grim.

  “Eh, I know that, sir!” Hugo assured him, apparently taking this to himself. “Now, there’s no need for anyone to go giddy over the lad! And no need for you to think our Richmond’s being hidden from you, Ottershaw, just because his lordship don’t like getting visits at midnight from Riding-officers, and being told he’s to produce his grandson slap! Nor because I told you you’d do better to go away—which doesn’t mean that the lad’s not here! He’s here reet enough, but there are reasons why you’ve not just nicked the nick in choosing your time! The fact is there’s been a bit of an upset—”

  “Why the devil couldn’t you have said so before?” demanded Vincent. “What sort of an upset?”

  “Nay, I can’t explain it now! All I want—”

  “Major Darracott
!” suddenly interrupted the Lieutenant, “you are perhaps not aware that your cuff-band is bloodstained!”

  The Major looked quickly at his wrist and then directed a quelling glance at Ottershaw. “Ay, well—never mind that! It’s of no consequence!”

  “I must ask you to tell me, sir, how you come to have blood on your cuff, when you appear to have sustained no injury!”

  He was somewhat taken aback by the Major’s response. Looking at him with a fulminating eye, the Major said, under his breath: “Sneck up, will you, dafthead?”

  “Hugo, no!”Mrs. Darracott cried involuntarily, starting forward. “Richmond—? Not Richmond, Hugo, not Richmond! It isn’t true—it couldn’t be true!”

  “No, no, it’s got nothing to do with Richmond!” said Hugo, in exasperated accents, adding bitterly to the Lieutenant: “Now see what you’ve done!”

  “Whom has it to do with?” demanded Vincent. “Come, out with it!”

  “If you must have it, our Claud’s met with an accident!” said Hugo, in a goaded voice. He looked at Lady Aurelia, and said apologetically: “I didn’t mean to say it in front of you, ma’am, and, what’s more, Claud’ll be reet angry with me for doing it! There’s no cause for alarm, mind, but happen if you’d go down to the morning-room, Vincent—”

  “I will certainly go down. What happened? Did he cut himself?”

  “Nay, it’s not exactly a cut,”replied the Major-evasively.

  Lady Aurelia rose. She had scarcely taken her eyes from the Major from the moment that he entered the room, as he was perfectly well aware, but it was impossible to interpret that steady gaze. She said, with her accustomed calm: “I will accompany you, Vincent.”

  “Well, I wouldn’t do that, if I were you,” said Hugo. “He’d as lief you didn’t: he doesn’t want a fuss made, you see!”

  “You would do better to remain where you are, Aurelia!” said his lordship, his voice a little strained. “Depend upon it, he’s done something foolish, which he doesn’t wish us to know! Elvira, I wish you will go back to bed, instead of standing there like a stock!”

  “I will not go to bed!” declared Mrs. Darracott, with startling resolution. “If this insulting young man is determined to see my son, he shall see him! I will take you to him myself, sir, and when you have seen that he is precisely where I told you he was—in bed and asleep!—I shall expect an apology from you! An abject apology! Come with me, if you please!”

  “Nay, ma’am, I’ll take him!” offered Hugo hastily.

  “Thank you, I prefer to take him myself!” she said.

  Ottershaw, glancing uncertainly from one face to the other, encountered yet another of the Major’s fulminating looks. This time it was accompanied by an unmistakeable sign to him not to go with Mrs. Darracott. He began to feel baffled. He had not expected to find that Major Darracott was in any way entangled in Richmond’s crimes, but he had very soon realized his mistake. He was a good deal shocked, even sorry, for it was abundantly plain that the Major was desperately trying to fob him off. Then, just as he had decided that the Major was recklessly aiding Richmond to escape from his clutch, it seemed as if it was not from him that this large and somewhat clumsy intriguer was trying to conceal something, but from Lady Aurelia, and Mrs. Darracott. That had puzzled Ottershaw; the signal that had just been made he found quite incomprehensible, for it almost seemed as if what the Major was trying to conceal could scarcely have anything to do with Richmond. Frowning, he stood listening to the Major’s efforts to get rid of Mrs. Darracott. It suddenly occurred to him that perhaps he was only anxious to spare her the shock of witnessing her son’s inevitable exposure. If that were so, Ottershaw was very willing to further the scheme. He said: “If you will take me to Mr. Darracott’s room, sir, there is no need for Mrs. Darracott to come with us.”

  “That is for me to decide!” said Mrs. Darracott, flushed and very bright-eyed. “I, and no one else, will take you, sir!”

  The Major gave it up. “Nay, he’s not in his room!” he disclosed. “He’s downstairs.” Looking extremely guilty, he said: “Seemingly, my grandfather ordered him off to bed, but—well, he came downstairs instead! We’ve been playing piquet.”

  “Major Darracott, do you tell me that he has been with you all the evening?” demanded Ottershaw. “Take care how you answer me, sir! I have very good reason to suppose that Mr. Richmond Darracott, until less than an hour ago, was not in the house at all!”

  “Nay, you can’t have,” replied the Major. “He’s been with me ever since he was sent off to bed—and, what’s more, he’d no thought of leaving the house, for he’s having such a run of luck as I never saw! Pretty well ruined me, the young devil!”

  “Well!” exclaimed Mrs. Darracott. “I must say, Hugo, I think it was very wrong of you to encourage Richmond to sit up late when you know how bad it is for him! And as for gambling with him—Well, I shall say nothing now, except that I didn’t think it of you!” Her voice broke, and tears started to her eyes as she directed a look of wounded reproach at Hugo. He hung his head, looking very like an overgrown schoolboy detected in crime. Mrs. Darracott, the top of whose head perhaps reached the middle of his chest, said with cold severity: “You will now oblige me by going downstairs again, and desiring Richmond to come to me here immediately!”

  The expression of dismay on Hugo’s face lured Lieutenant Ottershaw into banishing doubt. Certainly betrayed him into abandoning the dogged deliberation which made him formidable; the light of triumph was in his eye as he said, on a challenging note: “Well, sir?”

  “Nay, I can’t do that! I mean—I don’t think—” Hugo stammered, looking wildly round for succour. “Well,—well, for one thing—happen he won’t care to leave our Claud!” His guileless blue eyes, meeting Ottershaw’s in seeming horror, took due note of the fact that that dangerously level-headed young man had at last allowed himself to be coaxed into an unaccustomed state of cocksure excitement. He said, as one driven from his last defensive position: “The fact is—he’s just a bit on the go!”

  “Do you mean that Richmond is drunk?”cried Mrs. Darracott. “Oh, how could you? I thought you were so kind, and good, and trustworthy!”

  “In that case, Major Darracott, I will go to him!”said Ottershaw. “You are sure, no doubt, that Mr. Richmond Darracott is drunk, and not wounded?”

  “No, no, he’s not—” Hugo checked himself suddenly, an arrested look on his face. “Now, wait a minute!” he said. “Wounded, did you say?”

  “The Lieutenant, coz,” interposed Vincent, “was good enough to inform us, before you came upstairs, that Richmond had been shot by one of the men under his command, not an hour since. He appears—perhaps fortunately!—to have been misinformed, but I am strongly of the opinion that an enquiry into the incident is called for.”

  The Sergeant stared woodenly before him. “Upon being commanded to halt, in the name of the King, the pris—gentle—the individual in question, instead of obeying—”

  “Shot?”interrupted Hugo. He turned his eyes towards Ottershaw. “In the wood, up yonder was it?”

  “Yes, sir, in the wood, up yonder! He was challenged—”

  “Were there—two men posted in the wood?” asked Hugo, in a very odd voice.

  The Lieutenant stared at him, suspicious and puzzled. “Yes, sir, two dragoons! They—”

  “And was—Mr. Richmond Darracott—wearing a mask, by any chance?” enquired Hugo, a look of unholy awe in his eyes.

  “His face was blackened, sir!”

  “Well, happen it may have looked like that,” said Hugo, very unsteadily, “but it was only—a sock, with a c-couple of holes c-cut in it!”

  At this point his command over himself deserted him, and, to the utter bewilderment both of Ottershaw and of Sergeant Hoole, he went off into a roar of laughter. Feeling much the same sensations as a man might have felt who, believing the ice to be solid, suddenly found it crackling all round his feet, Ottershaw saw the Major helpless in the grip of his mirth: slapping hi
s thigh; trying to speak, and failing to utter more than two unintelligible words before becoming overpowered again; mopping his eyes; and finally collapsing into a large armchair, as though too weak with laughter to remain on his feet.

  Watching this masterly performance with every sign of hauteur, Vincent said, as soon as his cousin’s paroxysms began to abate: “I think, my dear Mama, that, if Richmond’s condition in any way approaches Hugo’s, you would perhaps be well advised—and my aunt too!—not to come down to the morning-room.”

  She replied at once: “You need be under no apprehension: I have the greatest dislike of inebriety! Unless you should find your brother in a worse case than I consider probable, I have no intention of coming—or, if I can prevail upon her to listen to me, of allowing your aunt to do so either!”

  “Your good sense, Mama, is always to be relied upon!” he said, with his glinting smile, and graceful bow. His glance flickered to his grandfather’s face, set like a mask, its harsh lines deeply graven, the fierce eyes fixed in a rather dreadful stare on Hugo. Vincent could only hope that the silence which had fallen upon him would not strike the Lieutenant as strangely unlike him.

  The Lieutenant’s attention was concentrated on Hugo, who managed to utter, in choked but remorseful accents: “Ee, I’m sorry! Nay, it’s no laughing matter, but—oh, Lord, it’s better nor like! far, far better nor like!” He gave a final wipe to eyes that so much rubbing had artistically reddened, and looked at Ottershaw. He gave a gasp, and said imploringly: “Don’t look at me like that, lad, or you’ll start me off again! You come with me, and I’ll sh-show you—what you’ve done!” He got up, now grinning broadly. “Happen you’d better come too, Vincent, but there’s no need for anyone else!” He saw Lord Darracott rise stiffly to his feet, and said: “Nay, stay where you are, sir! Richmond will be fit to murder me if he knows I let it out to you that he’s had a cup too much!”