“I don’t know if I can handle you being with another man. I would do anything for you, Gretchen, anything, but sharing is not in my wheelhouse.”
“We could be together.”
“Not for real. We’d only have stolen moments here and there after you got pregnant. What if pregnancy is hard on you? What if you’re nauseous most of the time?”
“What if I’m not? That’s nine months where we can spend every free moment together.”
“How long will it take you to get pregnant?”
My gaze fell to the floor again, hope for us shattering into a thousand pieces. My mother had only had one child, and my grandmother had only born my mother. Multiple children didn’t run strong in my line. I remembered my mother speaking about how difficult I’d been to carry. Damn it. What if he were right? What if this was a convoluted pipe dream, a manipulation of the circumstances to ensure that Rose got her way without really having to tell us no?
“And then what? What about after you have the baby? Do I lose you then instead of now?” His bitter tone chipped at my already broken heart.
“I’m trying to find a way.” The words came out in a half-sob-half-wail. “Please, Alek. I would leave with you right this second if you would take me away from here, away from all of it.”
“I wish I could, Gretchen. By the gods, I would leave with you in a heartbeat if I thought it was safe.”
The door swung back open, and Rose stormed inside, slamming it behind her before the Drakonae could enter. It locked without a touch from her hand, and even under Miles’ pounding, it refused to budge. “Not a single Sister has left this castle in over a hundred years, and not a single one ever will. If you leave, you’d be vulnerable. If something happened to you, the entire House would suffer for it. Are you really that selfish?”
“I love him,” I said, trying to keep my voice from shaking.
Rose was angry. Her typically soft, compassionate brown eyes were flecked with white, and her skin was starting to glow. She kept one hand focused on the locked office door—keeping out the dragons—while the rest of her magick filled the room until the air itself seemed statically charged.
“Is your love worth the deaths of hundreds, perhaps thousands more innocent people? People who need to leave this Earth and return home. People who’ve fought their entire lives without the support of a place like Sanctuary. Is that worth you throwing away the dedication and sacrifice of your mother. Of your grandmother?”
One stab after another, each statement and question making me feel smaller and more insignificant than the last.
“You take the offer I made or leave it. As of this moment, Alek will not be permitted inside the Blackmoor residence again until you are pregnant. Any attempt to leave the premises will not be taken lightly. Alek… if you are caught trying to sneak in to—”
“Fuck you, Rose. If you think we can’t be in each other’s presence without sleeping together, you’ve got a few marbles loose in that ancient brain of yours. Gretchen and I are friends, first and foremost, and you think you get to just end tha—.” He coughed and grabbed his throat.
I screamed and threw myself at Rose’s feet. “Please. Let him go. Please. I’ll do it. I’ll do what you want.” Tears cascaded down my cheeks.
Rose released him from her magickal grasp, and his choking subsided. “I don’t want to have this conversation again.” Her voice was thin and pained and tired. “I know what it is like to love. And I know what it is like to lose the one we love. Be thankful for your years of friendship. You were blessed to have so many.”
Alek grabbed me by the shoulders, lifting me from the floor in front of Rose. “I love you. I will always love you, no matter what. Remember that…And never bow to her again.”
Then he was gone, snarling his way past Rose and between Miles and Diana, who stood speechless in the doorway.
My body shook with the remnants of a sob, and I wiped my eyes, determination filling my soul. I was done being broken. Done being a little girl, crying about her circumstances. Neither my mother nor my grandmother would’ve begrudged me happiness. They hated being stuck in the House of Lamidae as much as I did. There were others that felt the same and others that didn’t. Most said there was no use fighting the status quo, and so they didn’t. It wasn’t like anyone could win against a woman who considered herself god…at least of our world.
Didn’t mean I wasn’t going to try.
Chapter 15
ALEK
“Alek,” Miles shouted, sprinting to catch up with me.
Ignoring him, I barreled down the staircase in the foyer and out the giant oak door. I turned to the right, following the path to the left toward the street ahead.
“Alek, you can’t give up on her. Not if she’s your mate.”
I whirled on the Drakonae. Miles was only three or four inches taller than me, but I still had to look up, and in my state of unrest, everything pissed off me and my Gryphon, and not being taller than the alpha-asshole Drakonae calling me out was doing a bang-up job. A growl rumbled from my throat, and I felt my skin tighten and stretch. My beast pushed to come out and rip apart anything it could get its claws into.
“I don’t know if she is, Miles. I got thrown out of the Veil as a fucking fifteen-year-old. I don’t know my history, or my lore, or anything really about being a Gryphon. I’d barely gone through puberty. My family had just started teaching me. My father had taken me to our family temple once before the Incanti struck our city. There were dozens of us on Earth in ancient times—all teenagers mind you—but I haven’t seen a Gryphon in almost two thousand years. As far as I know…” I couldn’t say it. I couldn’t admit aloud that I was the only one left alive, even though I knew it was most likely the truth.
The big Drakonae fell into stride next to me, and we walked silently down the sidewalk, passing Calliope’s shop then the market. We halted in front of the small building Jared and I called the sheriff’s office and fire station.
“What do you feel when you are near her? When you touch her?”
I dragged in a ragged breath, staving off the burning rage building in the pit of my stomach. “I want her with a fury I can’t explain. My Gryphon wants her. I feel like I’m going to lose control and come out of my skin at the very thought of another man touching her. I want to rip Rose’s face off.”
Miles chuckled.
“What’s so fucking funny?” My voice carried a unique mix of beastly snarl and human annoyance. How could he possibly find humor in my situation?
“I think we’ve all wanted to rip Rose’s face off at one point in time.”
Now that I believe. “But you can’t. The fight would be over before you could lay a single claw on her.” Lamassu weren’t gods, but their magick could encompass everything around them with a mere thought or flick of their hand to direct the power. I’d seen Rose freeze rooms full of people. I’d felt the chokehold her magick could inflict. I could still feel it around my neck even now, and that small display of power had been just enough to remind me of my place—below her.
“Oh, I know. Believe me, I know.”
“At least her magick doesn’t work on you when you’re shifted.”
“It doesn’t help as much as you think. I can’t shift inside a building without bringing it down on everyone around me. I’m the size of a small gulf stream. At least you can fit inside a living room.” Miles’ tone carried a hint of amusement.
“Touché, though I wonder if it’s just your dragon that can block the magick. Have you seen her use her power on other shifted beings?”
“I cannot say that I have, perhaps a wolf? We shift so rarely these days. It’s difficult to remember when we fought wars in our beast form. Though I know that even as a Drakonae, if I haven’t fully shifted before the Lamassu magick takes hold, I can’t complete the shift.”
We entered the office, and I gestured for Miles to follow me to the back room. I needed to beat on something, and Jared’s reinforced punching bags would ha
ve to be my unfortunate victims today.
“Back on the subject of mates…” He stopped, looking at me to see if I wanted him to continue.
I nodded and picked up a couple of boxing gloves from a box against the wall.
“For many supernaturals of the Veil, Magick is how we recognize the connection to our mates.”
“Of the Veil? There are no supernaturals native to Earth?”
Miles shrugged. “None that we know of, but that doesn’t mean they don’t exist. There are stories in Earth legends that speak of peoples and powers or magick I’ve never heard of in the Veil.”
“I’m betting they all wish they had somewhere else to go now.”
“Probably,” Miles answered, a frown pulling the corners of his mouth. “Many from the Veil can feel our mates even when we are not near them. We know when they are upset or in pain. Though much of this does happen after sex has occurred or a claiming.”
“We haven’t had sex, and I do remember my father speaking about a blood bond between himself and my mother. I don’t know the ceremony and never witnessed one. They also had these matching glyphs on their bodies. Not sure how those came to be, either.”
“That is a start. Blood magick is common for witches. It is possible the Batemans might have some information on your people’s practices. I don’t know how the glyphs work, but I remember seeing them on your people from time to time.”
“I certainly hadn’t thought to ask the witches. Probably still won’t since Harrison Bateman is Rose’s go-to guy. Their family does anything and everything Rose asks. Anything I speak to them about would swiftly find its way to Rose’s ears. Not that I blame them, she saved Meredith and Hannah from being stolen by Djinn.”
“Saving a child is a debt that is difficult to ever repay.”
I took a deep breath, angled my body into a ready-stance, and launched a punch at the bag in the center of the room. Instead of a sand-filled bag, Jared and I had labored to create solid leather bags. They were hard enough to take a beating but soft enough not to tear flesh from our knuckles. The bag dipped nearly to the floor before springing back into place.
Miles moved around to the other side and stood, bracing the bag for my next strike.
I raised a questioning eyebrow, and he crooked a finger, inviting me forward. I struck again.
Left, left, right.
The last punch elicited somewhat of an oomph from the dragon shifter.
“Good stance. Lean forward a little more and keep your hands up.”
I rolled my neck, followed his advice, and launched my fists at the bag again. This time
Left, right, left, duck.
Left, left, right, knee.
I continued on for the next hour, beating the shit out of the bag until I heard the door at the front of the office open and slam shut.
“Feel better?” Miles stepped away from the bag, grabbing a couple of water bottles from the small fridge in the corner.
“Not really, but at least my Gryphon doesn’t feel like it needs to burst out at the moment.”
“Alek?” Jared’s deep voice called from the front room. “You here, man?”
“In the back,” I answered, catching the water bottle Miles tossed across the room. The cold water refreshed my parched throat, but now that I wasn’t hitting anything, the anxiety over Gretchen crashed back down around me, filling my brain with frustration and anger and plans that would either get me killed or kicked out of town.
Jared strolled through the hallway, nodding a silent greeting to Miles. “What went down?”
“Rose is a bitch.” The words left my mouth like arrows launched from a steel bow.
“We knew that already. All leaders want what promotes their cause over anything and everything else. Some have more morality and integrity, but mostly, they just want their way.” He sighed, leaning against the sheet-rocked wall of our training room. “Rose is no different. She has integrity. She doesn’t typically lie through her teeth…at least that I’ve noticed. And she truly seems to be on the side of the supernatural races, but otherwise, yes, she can be bitchy.”
“Well said.” Miles’ voice was low and filled with solemnity. “But back to the basics. Have you ever felt about a woman the way you feel deep in your soul about Gretchen? Finding a mate for a supernatural is a thing that can’t be dismissed.”
“A mate? Who the fuck said Gretchen was his mate? How can a Sister be…?” Jared’s mouth remained open as his words drifted away.
“I don’t know if she is…” I started, growling again, and I ran my fingers through my sweaty, spiky hair. “I’ve spent hours with her every day for over a decade. She was just a child, but I—” Damn it. I’d wanted to be with her from the very beginning. Needed to be in her presence. Needed to be close by. She brought my weary soul comfort and peace like I’d never had in my life before.
“You know it, don’t you?” Miles asked, his eyebrows raised questioningly. “It’s something you can feel. Something palpable in your soul.”
“She’s a baby.”
“She’s a grown woman in human years, a woman who’s been in love with you for a decade. Her pain was as genuine as her desperation to be with you.”
“If she sleeps with another man, I might go insane.”
“She won’t be able to go through with it,” Miles said, downing the last bit of his water before tossing it into the garbage can next to the fridge.
“I heard her agree to the terms.” My skin crawled like someone was dragging knives along it. My beast wanted out again. It would take her away from this place, but I couldn’t let that happen. Not with Xerxes’ Lycans and Djinn literally beating at Sanctuary’s doors.
“What did she agree to?” Jared asked, concern flashing in his eyes. “Why would she sleep with someone else?”
“Rose said we could be together if she participated in the joinings and got pregnant.”
Jared fumed, and flames flickered in his irises. His skin illuminated. Fire licked at the edges of his fisted hands.
“Hey, man.” I nodded, drawing his attention to his combusting skin.
He inhaled and exhaled several times. The flames disappeared and he sighed. “Sorry, but did you say Rose is going to require her to get pregnant by another before what…you can see her at all? Does she think you’re some seventeen-year-old boy who can’t control himself?”
“If Manda was in the building across the street, how would you behave?”
“Point taken,” Jared said, defeat filling his voice.
“If Gretchen truly is your Gryphon’s mate, being alone with her and unable to claim her would be a torture worse than any enemy could devise.”
“What do I do? I want Gretchen, but I believe in Rose’s goal of getting us back to the Veil. I want to go home. I need to know if any of my family—my people—survived.”
“I want to get home as much as you, man,” Jared said, his tone heavy. “But if it came down to saving Manda or going home, I wouldn’t be able to leave her.”
Miles nodded. “When the choice comes, you will do the right thing. Fate does not make mistakes.”
I chucked the sweaty gloves into the plastic crate by the wall. Fuck. “Fate sure likes to twist things around.”
“The gods have their own agendas. It is not for us to decipher, merely to react in the wisest way possible to stay strong and protect what is ours.”
“Our gods aren’t even in this dimension.”
Miles cracked a half-smile, looking like a man who knew the answer to the riddle everyone was trying to figure out. “Our gods are always with us. Why else do you think the humans around the world struggle to settle on one pantheon?”
“Because they have short lives and are shortsighted,” I said, spitting out the words as if they burned my tongue. I’d never liked humans—not until Gretchen. They were frail and easily broken. I was better off not investing time or emotion into a being that wouldn’t live more than seven or eight decades.
Tech
nically, Gretchen wasn’t all human.
It didn’t matter. I still wanted her. Loved her. Even if she was completely human. Magick, supernatural, or alien, I would keep every precious day with her and treasure it like a rare diamond. There was no other and would never be another who touched my soul the way she did. In all my thousands of years of life, there had been no one like her.
The roar of a diesel engine vibrated through the air, and my muscles tensed. All the stress I’d released into the punching bag surged back along with even more. My vision reddened, and I forced myself to breathe. In. Out. In. Out. My racing heartbeat slowed a little, and I stalked toward the door.
“Alek, this is not a good idea. You can’t do anything. She has to make the choice herself.”
“I can kill them all.”
“Alek,” Jared growled, his tone laced with irritation. He knew I wouldn’t kill anyone, but by the gods, I wanted to. I wanted to walk up to Harrison Bateman’s bus, climb aboard, and use my claws to eviscerate every single fucking male who’d had the nerve to come enjoy one of the Sisters. Any of the Sisters. Not just Gretchen.
The men were worthless human scumbags, paying to fuck and forget. They got to go back to their lives with no memory of their sins. They deserved to feel pain and fear and loss, but then I’d become the monster they feared. I’d be solidifying that they were right, that we were vicious animals to be hunted and killed.
I shoved the front door of our office open and stopped on the sidewalk. Miles exited behind me, but continued walking instead of stopping next to me. “Believe in her, Alek.” His voice was barely a whisper over his shoulder. He crossed the street to the green space and flat stone platform in the center of the town circle, and then continued across more street pavement to the front of the bus.
Jared came out to stand next to me while the Protectors escorted each male from the bus to the castle’s front door—influencing them to remember nothing of their human lives while inside the castle and then to remember nothing of their experiences outside the castle once they’d left. I’d heard the spiel before. I didn’t need to approach to know what was happening or be able to see the gray hairs on several of the human males’ heads. My eagle eyesight took care of that, zooming in like a powerful telephoto camera lens.
My Guardian Gryphon (Sanctuary, Texas Book 5) Page 12