by Toni Aleo
CHAPTER ELEVEN
AIDEN
AS I DRIVE to Mom’s wine bar, Brooks House, my dad’s words play over and over again in my head. I hate when he is mad at me. My mom always says I have that first-child syndrome, where I aim to please everyone. For the longest time, I didn’t agree with her, but it’s moments like these when I feel she may be right. I don’t want my dad to be mad, and if I’m honest, I don’t like how things went down with Shelli either. I don’t like how any of it went down. The sex, I liked that a lot, but I don’t like that I didn’t know who I was sleeping with. And I sure as hell don’t like that I may have hurt Shelli’s feelings.
As much as people want to believe I don’t care, I do. I don’t like hurting people; it’s not my jam. Which is why I keep feelings an arm’s length away. Things go bad when you actually start caring about someone. I’ve always had a soft spot for Shelli Adler, so it’s easy to see why this is a fucking shitshow. Our lives are too intertwined, and I don’t want her to hate me. Though, I think that ship has sailed, and she’s the captain of it.
When my phone rings, I pull it out of my pocket. My brows shoot up when I see it’s my brother, Asher.
“About time, I’ve only called nine times in the last week.”
My brother’s deep chuckle fills the car when the Bluetooth connects. “I knew why you were calling, and since you used to ignore me when our sisters would drive me crazy, I figured I’d hit ya with the same treatment.”
“Rude,” I accuse, and he laughs. “You know they’re insane.”
“I know, dude. I don’t get how Mom and Dad had such amazing, civil, handsome sons and then those two.”
“Emery set fire to Stella’s makeup.”
Asher doesn’t even laugh. “Dude, I watched her pick up a TV and toss it at Stella. That’s when she had to start going to therapy. She’s still going, right?”
“Yeah, but I don’t think it’s doing anything.”
“Because the cure is getting her away from Stella. Those two are insane. They hate each other but love each other at the same time. It’s some weird, sister shit. I don’t get it.”
I grin as I turn off the highway. “I don’t either, but it is what it is.”
“It is.”
“How’s school?”
“School, man—I’m kicking ass and taking names.”
“Nice. You don’t miss us, do you?”
“Nope,” he teases. “I’m happy out here. Thinking about staying after I graduate.”
“Really? That’s surprising.”
“Yeah, I love it.”
“That’s awesome, dude.” I mean it. Whatever makes the guy happy.
“How about you? Love being home?”
“Eh,” I laugh. “I thought I’d enjoy it more, but it’s only been a week and Dad already lit into me.”
“No way. His golden child prodigy? Never!”
“Ha. If you asked him, I’m the mud on the bottom of his shoe right now.”
Asher’s laughter falls off. “Wait. It’s not about that bullshit from last year, is it?”
“No,” I say quickly. “He says I need to grow the fuck up. His words, not mine.”
“Damn. What did you do?”
Even with the eight years between us, Asher has and always will be my best friend. He’s the yin to my yang. He’s totally different, but he gets me. And while I have no clue what he’s talking about when he gets all smart on me, I’d die for the dude. He’s a good brother. Great, even. When everything happened last year, I didn’t call my parents first. I called Asher. So spilling the beans on my situation with Shelli is easy enough.
“So. Wait. Sorry.” He laughs when I’m done telling him, and then he takes in a deep breath. “Dude, you slept with Shelli Adler?”
“I did.”
“You know that’s bad, right?”
“Depends how you look at it. We had a great time, but the Adlers will kill me.”
“Exactly!” he yells, and then he laughs again. “I’m so jealous. She’s so damn hot.”
“I didn’t know it was her.”
“Yeah, I don’t know how you didn’t, because I would know Shelli Adler a million miles away. She’s stunning. Don’t you follow her on Instagram? I mean, holy fuck, she’s gorgeous.”
“No, because for the longest time, she was ten.”
“She is not ten, dude. I mean, she’s a ten for sure. Jesus, she posted this picture of herself in this black dress… I swear, if she bent over…ass for days.”
“Wow. Do you have a thing for her?” I ask, and I’m confused by the knot in my chest. I don’t like that he’s talking about Shelli that way.
He scoffs. “Have you seen her? Everyone has a thing for Shelli Adler. She’s gorgeous.”
“We need to move on. You’re pissing me off,” I say, getting more annoyed. “But Dad says I was an asshole to her and I need to apologize.”
Asher tsks at me. “You do know our parents fucked you up?”
“Wait, what?”
“For real. Look at me, Stella, and Emery—we don’t have these issues because we only saw Mom and Dad after they got together. You saw them before and during, so you’re all scared to feel something, which is why you sleep around like you do. Why you won’t allow yourself to actually get close to someone.”
“What’s your point?” I ask, bored. I heard this not even ten minutes ago.
Asher laughs. “My point is Shelli scares the fuck out of you because she knows you, and you know her. Feelings could happen in a snap, and you don’t want that. You don’t know how to handle what you’re feeling, so you just turn into a jackass.”
“That’s bullshit. I’m not feeling shit because nothing could ever happen—even if I wanted it to. She’s her, and I’m me. My career could be ruined.”
“Likely excuse.”
“What does that mean?”
“Means until you get your head out of your ass and realize there is more to life than just fucking around, you’ll always be like this. Your career wouldn’t be ruined if you had a meaningful, loving relationship with her.”
There is a knot in my throat. “Are you high? I told you to be careful with those brownies out there.”
He laughs. “Seriously.”
“That will never happen, and there is nothing wrong with me. I’m good.”
“You’re lonely. You’ve never been in a relationship—”
“And I don’t want to be in one with her, that’s for damn sure.”
“Or you really do, and you don’t like the way that makes you feel.”
“What the hell? You know nothing!”
He scoffs. “I’ve been in a committed relationship for nine months. I know a thing or two. It’s pretty cool.”
My eyes narrow. “You’re still with that chick?”
“Jasmine. Yeah, it’s nice.”
“No, that’s dumb. You’re gonna break up and then feel like shit.”
Asher laughs. “Please tell me more about how Mom and Dad didn’t fuck you up?”
My face scrunches up as I pull into Brooks House. My mom and dad’s history has nothing to do with me. Yeah, I saw it all go down. I still remember the nights my aunt would hold my mom as she cried. Mom always felt like she was failing me because I didn’t have a dad. I was curious. I wanted a dad, but I loved my mom, I loved my aunt, I was okay. But then my dad came along, and I learned what it was like to be great. Dad completed us. But even so, I never forgot the way my mom would cry. Or how mad she would get at him. He’d hurt her, and she’d hurt him too. Yes, I’ve seen them be the happiest they’ve ever been, but the pain is there. Guilt. I don’t want that.
“I don’t like you right now.”
“I bet you don’t even like yourself right now,” he says. “You’re not an asshole, Aiden. I get it… It’s weird to feel something other than the need to fuck, but don’t be a dick just because you don’t know how to handle it.”
“You act like I’m in love with her or something.�
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“Or something,” Asher says simply. “I think, for the first time ever, you can’t get someone out of your head, and you don’t like it. I just heard you rant over a girl for more than ten minutes for the first time in our lives. I think that means something.”
“I think you don’t know shit,” I snap, and he laughs. “I have more important things to do and worry about than Shelli Adler. I have a new start, and I’m not ruining it by getting involved with someone who, hello, doesn’t even like me.”
“Whatever you say,” he says offhandedly. “But when you guys hook up again—and believe me, you guys will since she is still very much into you, because if she weren’t, then she wouldn’t have jumped on the defense so quickly.”
“She hates me.”
“Whatever, dude, but remember, don’t be a dick. Don’t be that guy.”
He’s on something. Probably those hippie-dippie brownies or something. “I gotta go.”
“Great talk!”
“Yeah, whatever.”
I hang up on his laughter as I get out of the truck and lock it up. Asher has no clue what he is talking about. Do I think about Shelli? Of course I do. She’s hard to forget. The things we did in bed, the way we touched, and then the way she looked at me with that defiant little tilt of her chin? Not even the pope could forget that. She’s unforgettable. But that doesn’t mean I want to shack up and make her mine. I’d love to sleep with her again, but it wouldn’t be smart. I’ve already made some bad choices—no need to make any more.
Though, man, if there is anyone I want to make bad choices with, it’s her.
That wasn’t a smart thought.
I shake my head as I head inside my mom’s wine bar. It’s a really upscale joint in Nashville’s Gulch. The place is packed like always, and the ambiance is pretty damn sexy. Mom wanted it to be as if you were sitting in a fancy barn illuminated only by candlelight. She succeeded hands down, and this was just voted one of Nashville’s most romantic spots. The food is supposed to be pretty damn good, and the wine is, of course, perfection. Tables are everywhere, some for four, some only for two. There are booths around the perimeter of the room and a huge bar in the middle of the floor, right beside the stage that holds a piano. There is someone setting up, but my sister immediately steals my attention.
“Hey, the girl replacing me is running late. Take a seat at the bar. I’ll be done soon.”
Then she’s off again. She’s been working here since she was sixteen. She started off as a hostess, but when she turned eighteen, she became a waitress. She makes damn good money and loves it. I think she’ll be the one to take over for Mom when the time comes. For the longest time, we all thought Asher would, but he wasn’t interested in Mom’s wine empire the way Stella is. She loves it. Can’t blame her either. Mom’s business is great.
As I sit at the bar, a glass appears before Stella winks at me. Then she’s off again. From the looks of the stellar red in my glass, I assume it’s merlot. I take a big sip, and I am impressed with myself when I’m right. Go me. I take another sip just as Stella appears in front of me behind the bar.
“Mom told me to tell you that Elli had to push back the party. She wanted to wait till y’all had a two-day break. I think that’s in a week or two, I don’t know,” she says quickly as she pours four wide-mouth glasses. “Call Mom.”
“I’ll get right on that,” I say since that party is the last thing I want to deal with right now. I look around the bar. “This place is poppin’.”
“Oh yeah, it’s a good night. Wish Mom would let me work past eight. She’s killing me.”
“You’re a baby, Stella.”
When she flips me off, I grin as she rushes to deliver her drinks. The crowd gets a little sexier after eight, which is why Mom doesn’t like Stella here then. I get it, but Stella doesn’t. She just wants to work. I lean back in my chair as a beautiful melody comes from the stage. I lean on my elbows so I can see, and I don’t expect what is before me.
In a tight black dress that hugs her thighs in the most delectable way, Shelli moves her fingers along the keys as she sings like an angel. I don’t know the song, but I also don’t care. It’s stunning. She’s stunning. Her hair is down over her shoulders in big wide curls, while her makeup has been applied to accentuate her eyes. Not that her blue eyes need it; they shine no matter what. When she hits a high note, her eyes shut, her lashes kissing her cheeks, and she captivates me.
For the love of God, how am I supposed to ignore this girl?
“Oh, let me get that.” I don’t even pay attention to Stella as she playfully wipes my mouth with a rag. “You’re drooling, bubba.”
“Shut it.”
“She’s pretty amazing, huh? I love listening to her.”
“Yeah,” I say as I watch people drop money in her tip jar. I knew Shelli sang; I remember when we were younger and all she did was walk around with her guitar. She was talented even then, but it’s nothing compared to now. Her voice stops the room, or at least me. It’s beautiful and belongs on a real stage. Just like that, all the pieces fall together. That was how she knew Chris; she was on Broadway.
Maybe I do need to grow up. If I had been paying even a bit of attention, I would have put two and two together. Then none of this would have happened. Then I wouldn’t have seen her crying in Elli’s truck. I still don’t know if that was about me, but I have a feeling it was.
“Everyone loves her here. She makes more money than I do, I swear it.”
“With a voice like that, how could she not?”
“Right? So talented.”
So beautiful.
I can’t take my gaze off her. Shelli opens her eyes, looking out into the bar as her voice carries, stealing everyone’s attention and stopping conversation. Her voice has an edge to it, but it’s soft and magical also. It’s not only her voice that has me breathless, it’s the way she sings. With such beautiful emotion, it’s impressive. It’s as if she is the song herself. It’s amazing to witness. She’s spectacular, but I could tell that before I slept with her.
If the need to apologize wasn’t great before, it is now. I don’t want her to be mad at me or even hate me. I don’t know why, but I can’t have that. Problem is, I don’t know how to apologize. I hardly ever have to, but I know I need to now. Not because my dad said to but because I want to. I lift up my glass and take a long sip as the napkin falls from where it clung to the base of my glass. I watch it fall, and then the idea is there. I place my glass down and reach for the napkin before stealing a pen out of the jar in front of me. I write quickly on the napkin and then glance back at the stage. She’s still singing as if there is no one in the room. My heart is in my throat as I get up, heading toward the stage and folding the napkin in my hand as the distance between us closes.
Her gaze locks with mine, and everything stops. With a shaky hand, I place the napkin on the sleek black piano before I bite my lip. She doesn’t stop singing, nor stop playing, but her eyes stay locked with mine, sending jolts of heat through my body. I want nothing more than to capture that mouth with mine and never stop. Her lips are so plump, so beautiful.
Shit… Asher may be right.
CHAPTER TWELVE
SHELLI
IT’S as if I’m on autopilot.
Aiden’s eyes are like gray thunderclouds as he walks toward me. Or better yet, walks like he’s having sex. He’s just so smooth, so sexy. I’m usually not into guys who are always so damn GQed out—nice suits, perfect hair, and expensive shoes. But all the times I’ve seen him since New York, he’s been just that, and I’ve been insanely turned on by him. It irritates the fuck out of me that I allow him to do that, but then, my body has not caught up with my brain. And if I’m honest, my brain is the only smart thing at the moment.
Because this heart of mine is still one hundred percent yearning for Aiden Brooks.
It’s so annoying.
Especially since I’m pissed that I cried over him. How pathetic do I have to be to cry
over some dude who doesn’t even want me? But then he’s walking toward me like that, and I feel like I’m the only thing he sees. My breath catches, but I keep on singing a soft version of Julia Michael’s “Issues.” I didn’t think I would love this job as much as I do. It’s such fun doing songs my way. I love it, and the money is great. Plus, I start my internship at the Assassins on Monday, and I’m stoked.
My life seemed to be getting on track, but then Aiden started for me with that spark in his eyes.
With his gaze intent on mine, he slides a napkin toward me. That’s it. Just the napkin, and then he walks away. Of course, I want to end the song right now and read it, but I still have another verse. As I sing, I watch him sit back at the bar and sip his wine. He’s watching me, those eyes ever so dark, with no cares that he’s staring at me. He’s utterly divine, and his suit fits him perfectly. His hair is down, curly around his face. He just shaved, and I know if I were near him, he’d smell delicious. He runs his finger along the mouth of his glass, and shit, it almost makes me forget the words to the song!
It reminds me of when he touched my mouth with those fingertips.
I finish the last note, and the room fills with the sounds of clapping. I love it here. It’s easygoing and I feel good, but right now, I’m on the edge of my seat as I reach for the napkin.
My breath is gone once I read what he’s written.
I’m sorry,
-Aiden
I blink. Then again. And then I squint at his handwriting. Irritation rattles through me as I glare at his napkin. If I were still ten, I would smell it to see if it smells like him, but now I just want to ball it up and throw it at him! Is this some kind of pity apology? When I snap my gaze up to find him, I see him walking out with his arm around Stella.
Oh, hell no.
“I’ll be back in five!”
I get up quickly and run as fast as I can in heels toward the exit. The cold hits me as soon as I push the doors open. I regret not getting a jacket first, but for some reason, when it comes to this guy, I don’t make good choices. I don’t see him at first, but then I catch him as he’s opening the door to the truck for Stella.