So instead, he’d bought a little starter home in a community where we were sure to have our privacy. I had no say in that either. I’d learned from the very beginning that this was his show. If I wanted to be with him, then I had to play by his rules.
I had never chafed at them until here lately. Things had changed for me, but maybe not for him. I was no longer happy with the quick stops in and out, like a one night stand that kept repeating itself. I wanted more, but to get more I would lose him.
One thing about Jonas Harp, he’s very forthright, there’s nothing left to question when dealing with him, because he spells it all out. I have the contract to prove it.
He came back into the room, dressed, not a hair out of place. He looked towards me in the bed with a look on his face as if he were studying me. I held still, not even breathing. Is this when he would shred my heart to pieces? I waited for the horrible words that would turn my world upside down but they never came.
He checked his watch before looking back at me. “You’ll be late back if you don’t get a move on. We have the Sorensen meeting this afternoon I need you there.”
Sweeter words were never said. My heart flew free like a bird and my body relaxed. I didn’t realize I’d been tensed as if waiting for a blow. He left the room and the house and only then did I fly off the bed and head for the shower to clean up.
The soap was still wet from his shower, the towel he’d discarded still damp. I ran the towel through my thighs touching my most intimate parts for one last feel of him.
Chapter 3
***
I hurried back into my clothes, and grabbed an apple on my way out. I know I should be eating better, but my appetite wasn’t what is used to be. I got into the car he’d bought me as part of the package. It wasn’t sporty, wasn’t flashy, but I’d done the research. It was the safest car on the market.
The price tag had given me heart palpitations, but surely this was evidence that he cared. There had been questions and whispers in the beginning but he’d taken care of that as well. As far as anyone was concerned it was a company car fit for the assistant of one of the city’s leading businessmen.
The reminder burst my bubble, even though I had the bill of sale in my name showing that it was indeed mine and had nothing to do with work. But I couldn’t share that with anyone. That contract that had once made me feel taken care of and protected was now an albatross.
I’d snooped around and nowhere was it ever said that he’d dealt this way with any of the women he’d taken to his bed after his family’s demise. Those relationships if they can be called that had never lasted longer than a few weeks.
I couldn’t imagine losing him that soon after having known him. Most of those women it was thought were still working for him; I probably see them everyday. But none of us dare share water cooler gossip about the great Jonas Harp or things would end badly for us. I wonder how he’s kept them quiet sans the contract requiring their silence.
It was something I’ll never know the answer to.
Back at the office it was Rachel I saw as soon as I walked in. She was leaving his inner office again with a most satisfied look on her face. He wouldn’t dare would he? How could he leave my bed, my body and come here to flirt with her?
“Oh Thalia, you’re back. I thought you were gone for the day.” I mumbled something to her but pretended interest in the readout on my computer screen.
It wasn’t long before he came through the door into the outer office where her and I sat on opposite walls behind our desks. He didn’t spare either of us a glance as he walked through.
“Ms. Carmichael let’s go.” I jumped up from behind my desk like a little puppy before I caught myself and smoothed out my movements. I did everything but poke my tongue out at her in some juvenile display of one-upmanship.
All the way upstairs in the lift he didn’t look at me, just kept his head straight ahead while I stood there fighting not to fidget. I could still feel him inside me from earlier but we might as well have been strangers for all the notice he gave me.
I happened to look up and directly into the reflected door of the elevator and our eyes met. My face flushed with heat. He’d been studying me the whole time. My legs felt like jelly when the doors opened for us to step out.
What had he been looking for? Was he looking at all my faults? All the ways I didn’t add up to the new and more appealing Rachel? I think maybe the pregnancy had done something to my hormones. Either that or I was losing my mind, because until lately I’d never been plagued by such thoughts of these. Maybe I should’ve. Maybe I’d become too complacent too comfortable with the fact that I was the first woman he’d set up in a home with a car. The first he’d ever kept this close.
We made it to the conference room where the meeting was to take place. I took a few minutes to compose myself while we waited for Mr. Sorensen to make an appearance.
I checked over my notes one last time and made sure everything was in order. I could feel his eyes on me, could feel the heat from his gaze. I was beginning to feel the discomfort of that stare when the silence was broken.
“Jonas my man, it’s good to see you.” The younger man entered the room the way he always does, boisterous and overly exuberant. He wasn’t bad looking, but he was no Jonas Harp, nobody was. He reached his hand out to Jonas and the two men shook before Jonas retook his seat.
He’d never said it but I don’t think Jonas liked him very much. He was here to ask for money to help keep his company afloat. For the past few weeks we’d been going over his company’s numbers, well Jonas had been. I was just the one taking dictation and gathering information where he sent me.
I didn’t know what conclusion Jonas had drawn but personally I wouldn’t give this overgrown child money to buy a hotdog. He was frivolous and immature when it came to business.
Some of that could be excused away by the fact that he’d inherited the company a little over a year ago from his dad who’d ran the company for the better part of thirty years. But looking into his personal life showed that it was more than that. He was more playboy jetsetter than businessman and it showed.
Far be it from me however to tell the great Jonas Harp how to run his business so I kept my opinion to myself.
Next came his trademark behavior whenever in the presence of anything female. “And the beautiful Thalia. When are you going to take me up on that offer? It’s not going to be on the table much longer.”
My eyes flew to Jonas before dropping away again as my face heated up. “You don’t need his permission, he’s just your boss he’s not your owner.” Andrew joked as he took the seat closest to mine.
Jonas didn’t say or do anything, just sat there looking at the screen of his laptop. “Are you ready Sorenson?” Andrew cleared his throat with a grin. “This guy, it’s all business with him isn’t it? Okay Harp shoot.”
I felt sorry for him. Had he known anything about Jonas he would’ve known that he had very strict rules of protocol when conducting business and this wasn’t it. The laid back frat boy routine was the fastest way to get yourself annihilated.
Jonas sat back in his chair and tapped his finger against the smooth polished mahogany of the desk. Here it comes. “Well Sorensen after looking over the numbers of the last quarter I can’t see why I or anyone else would funnel more money into your company.”
I could see from his expression that that wasn’t the answer Andrew had been expecting. “What are you talking about? We did very well last quarter.” Oh no, never go on the defensive with Jonas, he’ll eat you alive.
“Yes, the papers you forwarded to me shows a growth, but on farther digging I found the real numbers and they are nothing like what you represented to me.”
“You, how…you went behind my back?” Andrew was halfway out of his seat.
“Yes, I also went to the board and they agree. You’ll all receive very impressive severance packages, but you’re done.”
“What? You can’t do that. My fam
ily built that company from the ground up.”
“Yes and it’s a shame that you squandered most of it in less than a year.”
“I’ll fight you…”
“You may try, but it’s already done. The board voted in my favor last week. Had you been there you would’ve known this already. Not to worry I’m not aiming to cheat you, you’ll receive enough money for you to squander for a very long time. Now if you’ll excuse me I have a business to run.”
Jonas got to his feet and so did I, wondering what had just happened. I didn’t have any of that in my notes. Andrew was visibly upset when he got to his feet. “You’d do well to get away from this shark little Thalia. I don’t know how someone as sweet as you can stomach him.”
Oh no, don’t bring me into the middle of this. I didn’t look at either man and almost dropped through the floor when Andrew reached a hand out to me. “Don’t touch her.” The words lacked any hint of emotion, but I heard the underlying threat all the same.
Andrew pulled his hand back as if stung before facing off with Jonas again. “You don’t own her Harp. Don’t forget what I said Thalia, the offer still stands.” I didn’t raise my head, not even when he walked to the door and left.
I started to follow after Jonas as he headed in the same direction but he closed and locked the door before turning back to me. Now I could plainly see the look of anger on his face.
I took a step back ready to explain Andrew’s slightly veiled innuendos but wasn’t given the chance. Instead I found my back pressed against the desk and his body pressing into mine.
Without a word his hand came up under my skirt and I felt and heard the tearing of my new silk underwear. My eyes flew open but no words came. I felt the movement of his hands as he wrestled with his belt and the tab of his slacks.
I had no time to protest or acquiesce before I felt him shove himself into my body. I had no choice but to lift my arm to his shoulder for support.
He didn’t make love to me as much as fucked me. We’d had some wild encounters before but this was different. His forceful thrusts seemed to be sending a message. I looked into his eyes but that earlier light was gone. In its place was something more feral, almost lethal.
For whatever reason it took me to the brink and it wasn’t long before my body betrayed me and I came. He wasn’t far behind, but this time more than the feel of him emptying himself inside of me it was the word he whispered that had me reeling. “Mine.”
He pulled out of me and reached down to retrieve the torn silk before stuffing it into his pocket. I fumbled my clothes back into place and patted at my hair though he’d never touched it. I just needed something to do with my hands.
I followed him out of the room and back down in the lift not daring this time to look anywhere but at the floor. Once on our floor on the very top of the building I rushed to the bathroom to get cleaned up.
I had to take a few minutes to compose myself before going back out there. The last thing on my mind was Rachel and what she was doing here. My thoughts were filled with what had just happened and why? Jonas has never shown any sign of proprietorship before, never revealed even an ounce of jealousy, that wasn’t his style.
Back behind my desk I made myself busy as my mind tried to process all of it. What did that mean ‘mine’? Was he staking his claim? Was he admitting that I meant more to him than just another office fling?
And what had set him off? It couldn’t be Andrew’s behavior. He ought to know by now that Andrew was just a terrible flirt; he flirted with everyone. His exploits were plastered all over the front page at least once a week.
For the rest of the day I pondered it all and was still no closer to an answer by knockoff time. I left the office with my mind going in a million different directions at once.
All the way on the drive home I played the scene over in my head looking for an answer. I made myself a quick salad for dinner since I’d missed lunch again. Since I’d been ill I hadn’t regained my appetite and I’d lost a few pounds that I couldn’t afford to. I ate my salad standing at the kitchen island almost in a daze.
That night he didn’t come to me, but I guess twice in one day was enough for him. I just wish for once he’d thought to lie next to me in the night, to hold me close until I fell asleep. That’s something we’d never shared.
I didn’t look too closely at his possible reasons for that. Jonas never let anyone get too close, not even the woman who was sharing his bed. There was a wall around him that was almost impenetrable. One I wish I knew how to break through.
I fell asleep with that one word he’d whispered in my ear playing over and over in my head like a loop; so forceful so heartfelt ‘mine’. I slept through the night for the first time in a long time and woke in the morning feeling refreshed.
Chapter 4
***
I took care with my morning toilette and chose a suit I knew he would approve of, one that he’d shown appreciation for in the past. It was the first intentional move I’d made since this whole thing had started.
I don’t know what drove me this morning, but instead of fear and uncertainty of what the day might bring, I felt empowered. Sometime during the night I had solved the puzzle. Jealousy! It was jealousy of Andrew’s unwanted attentions that had pushed Jonas to do what he did on that desk. To say that word to me that revealed more of what he felt than anything else had ever done thus far.
That had to mean something didn’t it? Why else would he be jealous if he didn’t care? And why would he show me that side of him, when he was so secretive and selective with everything else he shared? It must mean something.
I hummed on my way to the kitchen for my morning tea and a piece of fruit. It was the only thing I could keep down this early in the day though I hadn’t been sick yet. I wasn’t looking forward to that, but at least I’d be able to keep my condition hidden a bit longer when it started because he was never here in the mornings.
I played the radio in the car on the way to the office, a vast contrast from the day before. My first blip came when I saw that his car was missing from its usual place. That wasn’t like him. From my first day here he’d always beaten me to the office everyday.
I walked into the building on unsteady legs. “Hey Thalia, how are you?” I looked up at the greeting from Amy, one of the junior secretaries who I’d once shared a cubicle with before I was promoted to the great man’s assistant.
“Hi Amy, I’m good and you?” She shrugged her shoulders and walked next to me. “Oh I’m fine haven’t seen you at the café for lunch in a while, are you doing okay? The big guy keeping you busy?”
What did she mean by that? I looked at her sharply but there was nothing in her face, nothing that said she was being anything but sincere. “You could say that. He’s a workhorse as you know, so it stands to reason that I’m kept just as busy.
“Well a few of us are going to the club this Friday night if you want to come along. It might be good for you.”
“Sure, I’ll think about it.” It had been some time since I’d gone anywhere but home and work.
Jonas was very clear that I needed to be available any hour of the day in case he needed me. There would be days when he didn’t come to me, but it didn’t matter, as long as I was where he wanted me to be then all was fine.
I left her at the lift and made my way up to the office. Rachel wasn’t in yet so I got the coffee started and straightened out my desk. Today was the follow up to yesterday’s meeting. In the next few days Jonas would finalize his takeover of what was it now, his third company in a year?
He’s been an automaton since burying his family, snatching up failing companies left and right as if to fill the void left by the loss. I grew more and more apprehensive when he didn’t show up in an hour.
Where was he? He didn’t show up by noon and neither did Rachel. My mind went to the only place it could. They were together. My world imploded at the thought. I was at a loss as to what to do. I’d never been in this situation
before and though I tried convincing myself that I was jumping to conclusions their very absence spoke volumes.
Where could I look for evidence? What could I do if it were true? What were my options if the man I loved had lost interest in me? I had no answers, only uncertainty and panic. Jonas was so private, so secretive it was hard to know what he was thinking. For as long as I’ve been sleeping with him, I still know no more than the people who followed his life in the gossip rags.
I tried keeping myself busy but my concentration was shot. Instead I sat in a daze for the rest of the afternoon until it was time to go home. It would be the first time I was leaving the office this early in a long time for any reason other than to service Jonas.
I felt despondent and desperate when I left the building, going as slowly as I could in the hopes of catching a glimpse of him. It wasn’t like he was going to give me an explanation for him not being here, But at least if I saw him I would know…what? I would still be no wiser.
I pulled into the garage and for the first time didn’t want to be here. I’ve always felt close to him here. This was our place, the place he’d chosen for me, for us to share.
I dragged myself out of the car because there was nothing left to do but enter the empty house and face another night of ennui. I didn’t have the strength to put a meal together so I put the kettle on to boil.
Three months, was that the new cutoff point? Had I used up my time with the precious Jonas Harp? The cup of soothing tea wasn’t any help it only helped to fuel my anger. I walked around the rooms of the house feeling the anger build.
I went over our relationship in my head from start to what may be the finish. I’d been hired a few months before our official meeting. Just one of many in the secretarial poo. I’d just been happy to have landed a job after months of searching.
Yes it was way beneath me, but in the current market it was better than nothing. Besides, the company paid at the higher end of the spectrum. My plan was to work my way up when given the chance.
The Good Girl Page 2