All a Man Is

by Janice Kay Johnson

  He wanted to think it was a prank call, but well-developed instincts said no. One of Sheriff Brock’s increasingly desperate staffers? More likely. If so, Alec doubted the threat was real.

  He couldn’t dismiss it altogether, though. Fanatics could be found anywhere. Frowning, he sat thinking about the call. He wasn’t worried about himself. He’d been a cop too long to ever be anything but wary. What he didn’t like was knowing that he now had an Achilles’ heel.

  Three of them, to be precise. And, although his home address was and would stay unlisted, it wouldn’t be hard to follow him home. Or even just ask around. This small city more often felt like a small town to him. Everyone knew everyone. And anybody watching him would see quickly that the woman and children living on the other side of the duplex weren’t just renters.

  But the caller hadn’t mentioned them, he reminded himself. Anyone in law enforcement got used to being threatened. This one hadn’t been atypical. He couldn’t deny that it had unsettled him, though.

  Tell Julia?

  No. All he’d do was upset her and make her overprotective, which wouldn’t go over well with Matt right now.

  He swore aloud, disconcerted when he heard his voice. Damn it, he was overreacting.

  One thing he could do was check with Noah Chandler and find out whether he’d had a similar call. Chandler wouldn’t be any more likely to give in to that kind of pressure than Alec was, but, like Alec, he had recently acquired an Achilles’ heel of his own. In fact, if Alec wasn’t mistaken, Chandler’s wedding to Colin McAllister’s sister was only a couple of weeks away. He had an invitation.

  Alec wondered if any security had been planned for the wedding.

  It was a good ten minutes before he could drag most of his attention back to his required-manpower projections for the city of Angel Butte.

  CHAPTER THREE

  TWO DAYS LATER, they were moved into the duplex, a huge relief to Julia after the aeon she and the kids had spent trapped together, first in the car and then the hotel room. At least with three bedrooms, each of them had a refuge. She would have been ashamed to admit to anyone else how grateful she was for the hours Matt usually spent holed up in his bedroom.

  The one drawback was that the kids’ bikes arrived on the moving truck along with the furniture, and now that he had wheels, she couldn’t think of a good reason to forbid Matt from disappearing to who knew where.

  Thank heavens for the positives she was able to cling to as the first week in their new home went on. Number one, of course, was Alec. He was there. Eating with them every evening, quietly interceding with Matt, teasing Liana, giving Julia a sounding board. He was everything she’d wanted Josh to be, and while making a comparison like that disturbed her, she was too grateful for Alec’s solid presence to let herself dwell on whether she was a dreadful person for contrasting him with Josh.

  Second, Matt had yet to pull anything awful, like get drunk or be caught shoplifting, or even get into a fight. He wasn’t exactly a delight, but she was letting herself hope, if only a tiny bit. Could having Alec so much more involved in their lives be making a difference?

  And then there was the fact that, despite her shyness, within a day Liana had made tentative inroads with a neighbor girl.

  Bothered that the girl seemed to be home alone all day, Julia kept an eye out the front window near the end of the third day. When she saw a car turn into that driveway, she strolled over to meet Sophie’s mother, who introduced herself as Andrea Young. Obviously feeling a need to explain why her daughter was alone during the day, Andrea immediately started talking about her divorce and the fact that her ex had shortly thereafter moved to Texas. To her credit, she kept an eye on the girls to be sure her daughter wasn’t overhearing her. The ex called occasionally, Andrea said with some bitterness, and that was about it.

  “I count my blessings he’s paying his child support so far.” She cocked her head. “You on your own, too?”

  “I’m a widow.” Julia hated saying that, seeing the instant sympathy. “My husband was military. The blessing is that we do have death benefits, so I’m not as strapped financially as most single mothers. As soon as we’re settled in, I’ll be job hunting, though.” She explained about her relationship to Alec and said that they’d decided to move to a smaller town for the sake of the kids, without being specific about her troubled son.

  Both women continued to watch the girls, who were playing hopscotch on the sidewalk, having drawn the squares with colored chalk Julia had provided. Sophie was apparently artistic, as she’d gotten Liana to help her decorate the sidewalk for several additional squares in each direction with elaborate, intertwined curlicues. They’d probably had more fun doing that than they were having now playing such a childish game, even though they kept making mistakes—seemingly on purpose—and then giggling madly.

  Julia mentioned Liana’s upcoming birthday, when she’d turn eleven.

  “Sophie’s twelve,” Andrea said, a slowness in her voice. “It’s legal to leave her alone now, but I’d rather not. Full-time day care is so expensive, though, and she begged not to have to do it, anyway. This in-between age is hard. She’ll be able to ride her bike to some of the Parks Department activities. I make her call me anytime she leaves the house.”

  She sounded helpless and maybe hopeless, too. Julia sympathized. Both emotions had become familiar to her.

  “I plan to sign my kids up for some of those activities, too. If she’s interested in any of the same things Liana is, I’ll be glad to chauffeur Sophie, too.”

  When Andrea invited her in for a cup of coffee, Julia was happy to accept. The two mothers pored over the Parks & Recreation Department schedule. Then they called the girls in for a consultation.

  The two-week horse day camp was a definite go, as were swim lessons. Sophie and Liana weren’t quite at the same level, but the advanced class took place right after the intermediate, and Julia insisted that it wouldn’t kill any of them to hang around the pool for an extra half hour one way or the other. Sophie wrinkled her freckled nose at the idea of ceramics class, but thought she might like tap dancing.

  Studying the two girls, Julia was disconcerted to see that, only one year older, Sophie was developing a figure. She didn’t wear a bra yet, but she probably would be before she started back to school. Which, in her case, would be middle school here in Angel Butte. In L.A., Liana would have been starting middle school, too. Thank goodness she wasn’t here. The fact that the two girls would be separated for school in September would probably kill this budding friendship, but as far as Julia was concerned, if it lasted the summer, she’d be happy.

  Now, if only there was a nice neighbor boy Matt’s age.

  But she didn’t kid herself that Matt would want anything to do with a nice boy.

  Which left her worrying about what he was doing when he rode away on his bike and didn’t return home for two or three hours at a time.

  When she asked, he only glared at her. “There’s nothing to do around here. I’m just, like, riding my bike, okay?”

  Her offer to help with Sophie was rewarded only a few days later, when Sophie shyly invited Liana to go to a movie with her on Friday night. The invitation included Matt, too, if he would like to see a blow-’em-up thriller that Andrea had noticed was also at the multiplex and running at close to the same time.

  Guilt induced Julia to offer to go with Matt, which earned her a look that almost reminded her of the much more likable boy he’d once been.

  “You’d hate that movie,” he said.

  She grimaced. “Probably. Still, if you want company...”

  He remembered he despised her and sneered, “Sure. My mother. Yeah, thanks but no thanks.”

  Knowing she should feel rejected, Julia could only be relieved.

  After the kids left, she tried to convince herself that sh
e was blissfully happy alone and wouldn’t even notice if Alec didn’t come home right after work. Or came home only to change clothes because he had a date.

  Of course, every time she heard a passing vehicle, her head came up. She hadn’t quite memorized the sound of his SUV yet.

  She couldn’t miss it when he pulled into the driveway so close by, though, and only a minute later her doorbell rang. Her pulse accelerated even though she’d half expected him.

  He had already shed his suit coat and tie. The cuffs of his white shirt were rolled halfway up strong forearms. He looked tired, she saw, but smiled when he saw her. “Hey. You and the kids want to go out for pizza or something?”

  “It so happens the kids have already gone out for burgers and a movie.” She paused for effect. “Without me.”

  One eyebrow tilted up, giving his face a wicked cast. “A fairy godmother?”

  “Andrea.”

  He knew about Liana’s new friendship, but still looked surprised. “Did you hog-tie Matt or drug him into compliance?”

  She told him the arrangement for separate but equal movies. “He’ll probably sit at a separate booth at McDonald’s or wherever they went, too, but Andrea seemed to understand. I haven’t started dinner yet, but if you’re okay with something simple—”

  “I vote we go out,” he said. “Someplace decent.”

  “You mean someplace the kids would boycott?”

  She loved his smile. “You got it.”

  He suggested Chandler’s Brew Pub, owned by the mayor. There was a live band scheduled, but he thought not until later in the evening. Julia quickly changed, had second thoughts over her choice and would have started over if she hadn’t been so aware of Alec waiting.

  When he saw her wearing slim-fitting black pants, heels and a shimmery tunic-length sleeveless sweater, his eyes had a glint that raised heat in her cheeks. It wasn’t the first time she’d seen that expression on his face, but she hadn’t decided what to make of it. If he was attracted to her, he obviously didn’t plan to act on it. Maybe he was only being politely appreciative.

  “You look about twenty-two,” he told her. “No one would believe you have a kid Matt’s age.”

  “That makes you a dirty old man to be giving me the once-over,” she suggested lightly.

  He laughed. “It’s been quite a few years since I’ve looked over a girl that age with anything approaching serious intent.”

  She felt a small burst of pleasure. Was he implying he had serious intent where she was concerned?

  But when he stepped so ostentatiously aside to let her exit ahead of him, ultracareful not to brush against her, the thrill died as if he’d dumped cold water on it. No, of course not. He thought of her as a sister. What else?

  Oh, God, she was so pathetic. Foolishly in love with her brother-in-law.

  She had to be sure he never knew. For the hundredth time, at least, she reminded herself that of course she should be glad he didn’t feel the same. His indifference reduced any temptation on her part, and yes, that was good.

  Alec was steadfast with her and the kids in a way Josh had never been, that was true. But in one essential way, he was too much like his brother. She’d always known that. She’d listened to the two of them talk so many times, voices laconic as they casually exchanged stories of terrifying exploits, but the excitement they felt seeping through.

  Yes, but are they really so much alike? asked a voice in her head, one she’d heard more often lately. Alec made a decision Josh never would have, didn’t he?

  But he could still regret it. He could still go back.

  And while he called himself a desk jockey now, she saw the way his head turned as they walked to his Tahoe, his expression flat. Julia knew he was conscious of everyone and everything within a block radius, down to any shadow of movement passing behind the reflected sunlight on windows.

  Once a street and vice cop, always one.

  Please don’t let him be too bored.

  Yesterday had been the Fourth of July. Since fireworks were shot off the crater rim of Angel Butte, they had been able to put lawn chairs on Alec’s small patio and watch from there. Liana had oohed and aahed while Matt, predictably, appeared bored. The show wasn’t as spectacular as some they’d seen, but they also hadn’t had to fight crowds, spend ages searching for parking and walk miles for a good spot for viewing. To Julia, this felt...magical. All of them together in the dark, in their own yard.

  All the neighbors were outside, too. After the fireworks show, people started lighting their own smaller ones. Andrea and Sophie came over. While the girls swooped across the lawn waving sparklers, Matt and Alec set off fireworks Alec had bought, murmuring together and laughing. Watching them, Julia had felt the sting of tears in her eyes from, oh, a complicated mix of gratitude and joy, and sadness, too.

  Talking about last night carried her and Alec through the short drive to downtown. The police department had gotten the predictable complaints, there’d been a few minor injuries but no serious ones and he was pleased at how his officers had handled the holiday.

  He found street parking less than a block from Chandler’s. On a Friday night like this, the sidewalk was busy. He stepped around her to be sure he was walking on the curbside, and actually went so far as to lay a hand on her back. The warmth of it burned through the thin knit of the sweater. She was kept from feeling flattered, though, by his expression, which was oddly distant as he kept watch around them, much as he had between her front door and his SUV.

  Had he always been so...protective? Funny, she didn’t remember ever noticing until recently. If he hadn’t been edgy in L.A., she couldn’t imagine why he’d be so here. Surely she was imagining things.

  He held open the door to Chandler’s. They’d barely stepped in when she heard a groan, almost but not quite beneath his breath. She looked at him, surprised.

  He bent so his mouth was close to her ear. “Chandler’s here. Thank God, it looks like he’s well into his meal, so neither of us will feel obligated to suggest we make it a foursome.”

  The handsome and absurdly young man serving as host greeted Alec as Chief Raynor and ushered him and Julia straight to a table that had just been cleared by a busboy. The route took them close to the booth where a man she recognized from that television news interview sat with a beautiful woman with pixie hair and intriguing earrings that shimmered in the light when she turned her head.

  Alec’s hand splayed on Julia’s back again and he steered her over to the booth. “Chandler,” he said with a polite nod. “Cait. I’d like you to meet my sister-in-law, Julia Raynor. Julia, our mayor and my boss, Noah Chandler, and his fiancée, Cait McAllister.”

  In a surprisingly gentlemanly gesture, the mayor slid out of the booth and rose to his feet. He took Julia’s hand in his much larger one. “Good to meet you. We’ve all been hearing about you.”

  She laughed. “Hmm. I think I’ll refrain from asking what he had to say.”

  Noah Chandler was an intriguing man, she realized. She remembered the word tough coming to mind and even thinking he was kind of ugly, but in person...he was really a very sexy man, if big enough to be alarming to her. And the smile on his fiancée’s face was genuine and warm.

  “We didn’t know if you’d arrive in time or not,” Cait said, “but Alec has an invitation to our wedding and we hope you’ll come, too.”

  Julia returned the smile. “I’d love to come. You should have made the wedding on the Fourth, and you could have had a fireworks send-off.”

  Noah’s grin was downright rakish. “Oh, there’ll be fireworks.”

  Cait laughed, rolled her eyes and blushed all at the same time.

  The host was politely waiting to one side, clutching menus, so Alec excused them and they allowed themselves to be seated by the window.

  Not until they
were alone did she laugh. “Okay, why the groan? He seems nice enough.”

  “Nice isn’t the word that comes to mind to describe Mayor Chandler,” Alec said drily. “He’s improving on acquaintance, though.” He glanced their way. “I did tell you about Cait getting kidnapped and Noah rescuing her, didn’t I?”

  “Yes, sort of.” Her forehead wrinkled as she thought back. It had all happened during her last few days getting herself and the kids ready to leave Los Angeles. As she remembered it, he’d said they “had some excitement here in Angel Butte.”

  “But I hadn’t met anybody you were talking about, and mostly I was having a quiet panic attack because our handpicked town didn’t sound nearly as safe as I’d imagined it. So tell me again.”

  “Let’s choose our meals first, before the waiter shows up,” he suggested.

  Since she’d had it with pizzas and burgers, she went with an interesting-sounding wrap, while Alec ordered a steak. Once they had their salads and a Cabernet from a Willamette Valley winery, he told her the story in more detail.

  She had also seen Cait McAllister’s brother during that news clip. He was the police captain who was running for county sheriff, the one the mayor admitted having blacklisted for the job of police chief. Cait had lived in Angel Butte as a child, but hadn’t been back since she was ten years old. Only recently had she moved here to be near her brother. Within days of her arrival, impulsive words spoken to a barely remembered acquaintance made her the target of a killer. She’d eventually remembered as a child seeing two men burying something, and one of the two was the man she’d spoken to.

  “After they filled in the hole back then, they poured a concrete patio over it,” Alec told her. “Once Cait pointed us to the right place, we broke it up and, no surprise, found bones.” He grimaced. “In a bizarre twist of fate, the dead man was Chandler’s father. Solved what had been a mystery in his life.”