Popped Off

by Allen, Jeffrey

  “I think he left out some details.”

  “Guess so. But if he’s got money, I say yes.”

  “Isn’t that some sort of conflict of interest since we’re already helping Belinda?”

  Victor shrugged his tiny shoulders. “I don’t think so. The broad, we’re helping her find the money. With this dude, we’re looking for his brother.”

  “They’re one and the same.”

  Victor rolled his eyes. “Look, we got two people willing to pay for our services. Rule number one for private investigators is always say yes to the money.”

  I made a face. My enthusiasm for investigating was fading. I wasn’t involved this time, and I was tired of dealing with people who seemed to be missing a few screws. I didn’t need the work. And I sure as hell didn’t need the frustration.

  “He said he’d meet with us Monday,” Victor said, sensing my reluctance. “On our terms, wherever we wanted.”

  “He wouldn’t tell me anything.”

  “We’ll tell him it’s one and done. Either he spills what he knows or we dump him and he can go find his own brother. Simple.”

  I doubted it was going to be simple, but I wasn’t sure what else to say. “Fine.”

  He hopped down out of the chair. “Excellent. Monday morning for breakfast. I’ll set it up.” He stopped. “Hey. The swaddling thing? It worked.”

  “I told you it would.”

  “Well, you don’t need to get all puffy about it. I’m just telling you it worked for us. He’s sleeping and not crying so much.”

  “I told you it would.”

  His face screwed up in agitation. “I’m trying to say thank you, you big moron.”

  I smiled. “I know. I just wanted to hear you say it. And you’re welcome. Let me know if you need help with anything else.”

  He made a face. “I won’t need any other help from you. Guaranteed. I got this daddy thing wired.”

  “Sure you do.”

  “Go ahead, doubt me,” he said, walking to the door. “But I got it down. Maybe I’ll quit my job and sponge off my wife like you do. Play Daddy all day long and eat bonbons.”

  “Your wife probably puts the bonbons up high in the fridge,” I said. “You’d have trouble reaching them.”

  “Your short jokes get old, moron,” he said, sneering. “I’ve heard them all.”

  “Really? That sounds like a challenge.”

  “Bring it. I can handle you.”

  I lunged at him, like I was going to grab him. He jumped, spun, and sprinted out of the bedroom.

  30

  Both of my girls were awake when I went downstairs, and Julianne seemed very pleased with herself that she’d sent Victor to wake me up.

  “That little man is funny,” Carly said, working hard on a drawing of what was either a cow or a spaceship.

  “If you say so,” I said.

  “Plus, he’s my size.”

  “That is accurate.”

  We spent the rest of the evening eating dinner, playing games, and watching a little television. On Sunday we stayed close to home, playing out in the yard, picking up the house, and generally being lazy. By the time Monday morning rolled around, I felt back in sync with my life.

  I dropped Carly at VBS and headed into town for my breakfast meeting with Victor and Elliott. I was still hesitant about working with Elliott, but at least I’d have Victor’s opinion this time. As much as I hated to give him any credit, he knew his job and he did it well. If he thought we could work something out with Elliott, we probably could. What he lacked in social graces, Victor more than made up for in savvy business skills.

  I found the two of them at a table near the front window of the diner on Main. Victor raised a small hand at me when I entered, while Elliott just stared blankly at me.

  I took the seat next to Victor. “Morning.”

  “Morning,” Victor said, holding a coffee mug with both hands.

  Elliott nodded.

  “I’ve just been getting to know Mr. Huber here,” Victor said.

  “Ah, lucky you.”

  Victor frowned at me. “Easy.”

  I looked at Elliott. “Just so we’re clear, when Victor told me you contacted him, I was against working with you.”

  “Thanks for the info,” he said.

  “I gave you plenty of time to tell me what you knew and to come up with an idea of how to help you,” I said, “but you wasted my day.”

  A waitress came, and I ordered pancakes, bacon, and coffee. Victor ordered the same. Elliott shook his head and sipped from his ice water.

  “You have to understand,” Elliott said, “I’m not exactly sure what I’m doing here.”

  “Well, that makes two of us,” I said.

  He set the water down. “I don’t want to go to jail.”

  “You stole. From a casino,” I said. “You aren’t going to have much choice.”

  “We’ll see,” he said. “But forget about me. I wish to help my cousin.”

  “How much is he in for?” Victor asked.

  “A little over a hundred thousand,” Elliott responded.

  “Then he’s got enough to pay it off,” I said.

  Elliott looked at me, confused. “I don’t think so.”

  “He took seventy-five thousand from the soccer association,” I said. “And he stole a boatload more from the church. I don’t even get now why you had to steal from the casino.”

  Elliott squinted at me. “Wait. Church? What?”

  I recounted my conversation at the church with Haygood.

  Elliott’s expression hardened. “That is not true.”

  “What isn’t?” Victor asked.

  “Moises did not steal that money.”

  “How do you know?” I asked.

  His eyes shifted away from us for a moment. “I would know if he did that.”

  “Maybe he owed more than you knew about,” Victor said.

  Elliott shook his head. “No. Not possible.”

  I looked at Victor and shrugged. “Just telling you what I was told.”

  “He had a gambling problem?” Victor asked. “You don’t deny that, right?”

  Elliott thought hard for a moment, then nodded. “Yes. He does.”

  “So isn’t it possible that he might’ve been in deeper than he told you?” Victor asked.

  Elliott tapped his fingers on the table. “It’s possible, yes. But I don’t think so.”

  “Why?” I asked. “Why are you so sure?”

  “Because he would’ve told me,” he said. “And because he was doing other things to pay off his debts.”

  Victor raised an eyebrow. “Like?”

  “I don’t wanna say.”

  “Told you,” I said, shaking my head.

  Our food arrived, and I dug into it, thinking about what I was going to do with the rest of my day, because it sure didn’t look like I was going to be doing anything to help Elliott Huber. Wash the car. I hadn’t washed the car in forever, and it was going to be nice....

  “Look, pal,” Victor said, shoveling pancakes into his mouth, “if you want our help, you’re going to have to be an open book. End of story. Either you are or you aren’t. It’s pretty simple. And if you don’t want to be, that’s cool. Let’s part friends now.” He wiped his mouth. “Because if we agree to help and you hold out on us, I guarantee you, we will not part friends.”

  Like I said, Victor was good at his job. He managed to sum up everything I had tried to convey to Elliott in the barn in about ten seconds. He was a pain in the ass, but he was good.

  Elliott leaned back in his chair, contemplating his next move.

  We ate and drank coffee and said nothing.

  “All right,” Elliott said finally. “I understand. I will be an open book. But I need something else, then.”

  “We can’t keep you out of jail,” Victor said. “That isn’t going to be our choice. Ultimately, you and the casino are going to have to work that out between yourselves.”

 
; Elliott shook his head vehemently. “That’s not what I mean.”

  “What do you want, then?” I asked.

  “Protection.”

  “Protection?” I glanced at Victor. “Like bodyguards?”

  Elliott nodded. “Yes. I am going to need protection.”

  “We can’t guarantee that, either,” Victor said. “We can offer some suggestions, but we aren’t bodyguards, pal.”

  Elliott thought that over. “These suggestions . . . they will help keep me safe?”

  Victor shrugged. “Probably. If you’re talking about hiding or whatever, I can help you with that. But not from the law.”

  Elliott’s face tightened in anger. “I told you, I understand the legalities. I am not going to hide from the police once this is settled.”

  “So who are you going to hide from?” I asked. “Who do you need protection from?”

  He fixed me with a hard stare. “The girls.”

  31

  “You mentioned these girls the other day,” I said after our plates had been cleared and our coffee cups had been refilled. “Who exactly are they?”

  Elliott leaned into the table. “They are the ones who have Moises.”

  “You’re sure?” Victor asked.

  Elliott nodded. “I’m sure. They are evil, evil girls.”

  “Are they, like, his bookies or something?” I asked.

  Elliott held a finger to his lips, indicating I was speaking too loudly. Then he nodded. “Yes. They are the ones who handle his bets.”

  “Who are they?” I asked.

  “They are all young and pretty and act very nice,” Elliott said, sneering, like he smelled something awful. “But you better believe they are nothing like that.”

  “Who are they?” I asked again.

  Elliott set his jaw. “College girls.”

  I looked at Victor, and then we both burst out laughing. I wasn’t sure what I expected to hear, but it certainly wasn’t that. I couldn’t even conjure up the image.

  “I’m serious,” Elliott said after our laughter died off. “Students. In a sorority at SMU.”

  I looked at Victor again, and we laughed even harder this time.

  A look of annoyance took up residence on Elliott’s face. “You don’t believe me.”

  “What’s the name of the sorority?” Victor asked. “We Takka Bets?”

  I laughed and we high-fived.

  Elliott’s face reddened. “I am not making this up. They are the ones responsible for my cousin’s gambling debt and the ones holding him hostage.”

  “I can think of much worse places to be held hostage,” Victor said and then dissolved into a fit of giggles again.

  Elliott looked at me. “The room he was in yesterday? What did it look like to you?”

  I thought back to Moises’s face on the computer screen. The white headboard. The baton.

  “A girl’s room,” I said, glancing at Victor.

  Elliott nodded. “Yes. Exactly. Because it was.”

  “Are you really trying to tell us he’s being held against his will in a sorority house?” I asked.

  Elliott sighed, irritated and frustrated. “Look, I don’t know all the details, all right? But I do know that they are holding him against his will and that they are the ones he owes money to. You can believe me or not, but it’s true. And the stories he’s told me? These are not normal college girls.” He shook his head. “Not normal at all.”

  Victor was still giggling, but I was starting to feel bad. Elliott was clearly telling us what he believed to be the truth. As absurd as it sounded, there was something there that made him believe it was fact.

  “Do you know how Moises got hooked up with them?” I said. “How he started placing bets with them?”

  Elliott shook his head. “No. I’m not sure how it started.”

  “What did he bet on?”

  “Everything.”

  “Sports?”

  “All sports. Even the kids’ sports.”

  “Kids’ sports?”

  “The soccer program he is in charge of?” Elliott nodded. “He was betting on those games.”

  I felt like my head was going to explode.

  “He was betting on kids’ soccer games?” I asked, making sure I heard him correctly.

  “Yes. He thought he could make a fortune on them since he ran the league and knew all the coaches and players and teams. But turns out it was hard.”

  No kidding. I thought of all the different things that affected Carly’s team. Lack of sleep. Appetite. The weather. Planes overhead. There was no possible way to find any consistency in little kids. Betting on those games seemed like suicide.

  And who in their right mind took bets on those games? Who set the lines?

  “The sorority,” Elliott said, reading my mind. “They set it all up.”

  I looked at Victor. “I don’t even know what to say.”

  Victor just shook his head, unsure what to think.

  “And there is something else,” Elliott said.

  “Of course there is,” Victor said.

  Elliott focused on me now that I seemed to be the one who was trying to take him seriously.

  “When Moises’s debt started to grow and it became obvious he couldn’t pay it,” Elliott said, “they asked him to start doing things.”

  “Doing things?” I asked.

  “Illegal things.”

  I let out a long, deep breath. “All right. What kind of illegal things?”

  Elliott again leaned into the table. “Smuggling.”

  “I think I’ve officially heard it all now,” Victor muttered. “Really.”

  Elliott set his eyes on me. “You asked me about the trophies yesterday. You remember?”

  “I remember.”

  “Those are what he is using now to smuggle.”

  “The trophies?”

  Elliott nodded.

  “What trophies?” Victor asked. “I’m lost.”

  I quickly explained the missing soccer trophies to him.

  “These girls,” Elliott said, “they are serious business. They are organized, and they know what they are doing. I think they finally just decided that they no longer trusted my cousin, and decided to hold him until he paid what he owed them.” He shook his head. “And you can laugh all you want, but they are capable of many bad things.”

  I was trying to take him seriously. The things he was talking about—gambling, smuggling, kidnapping—were the things you tied to organized crime or gangs. It was difficult to place the faces of a sorority on those things.

  But there was something sincere in Elliott now that I had either missed or ignored the previous day. I wasn’t sure he had all his facts right, but I believed that he thought he was telling the truth.

  “They will hurt me if they know I’m talking to you,” Elliott said. “I know this.”

  I nodded. “Okay. All right. We’ll see if we can protect you.”

  “Wait, wait, wait,” Victor said. “I wanna hear more about these trophies.”

  “I don’t know all the details,” Elliott said. “This was the first time he had to do that.”

  “So what was he doing with them?” I asked.

  “He was hiding the stuff in the trophies,” Elliott said. “I’m not sure what the plan was from there, but he had to fill up the trophies.”

  “Fill up?” I asked.

  “The girls,” he said. “With stuff that they sell.”

  “Drugs?” Victor asked.

  “Yes, I suppose that’s what you’d call it.”

  “You suppose?” Victor said. “They are either drugs or they ain’t, pal.”

  “Yes, it was drugs,” Elliott said. “But not what you are thinking. You are thinking cocaine or marijuana or something like that, right?”

  Victor and I both nodded.

  “Not those kinds of drugs,” Elliott said.

  “What kind then?” I asked.

  Elliott leaned into the table. “Viagra.”
/>   32

  “I don’t know what they do with it,” Elliott said as we walked out of the diner. “But that’s what he had to pick up.”

  “Where?” I asked.

  “He had to go down to Mexico,” Elliott said. “He filled the trophies with the pills.”

  “Did you go with him?” Victor asked.

  “No. He wouldn’t let me.”

  “Do you know where the trophies are?” I asked.

  Elliott shook his head.

  I looked at Victor. “I don’t even know what to say.”

  “Me, either,” Victor said. “Me, either.”

  “So you won’t help us?” Elliott said.

  “I didn’t say that,” I said, before I could stop the words from coming out of my mouth.

  “We’ll discuss it,” Victor said, giving me a pointed look.

  I ignored him. “You were able to contact Moises yesterday on Skype.”

  “Yes.”

  “Can you contact . . . the girls?” I asked.

  He looked suddenly uncomfortable, like ants had made their way up his pants. “I don’t know. Maybe.”

  “See if you can,” I said. “I’d like to go meet with them.”

  “We’ll discuss it,” Victor growled.

  “I’m not sure you want to do that,” Elliott said. “I am not lying about them. My cousin has told me many stories.”

  “I’ll take my chances,” I told him.

  “We’ll discuss it,” Victor yelled, tired of being ignored.

  “After we discuss it,” I said.

  “I am unsure what to do now,” Elliott said.

  “Go home,” I said.

  “I’m not staying at home. For a lot of reasons. I’m at the barn.”

  “Then go back there. We’ll be in touch later today. I promise.”

  He shook hands with each of us and walked down the block, disappearing around the corner.

  “You can’t honestly be serious,” Victor immediately said.

  “About?”

  “About taking this nutcase on.”

  “Why is he a nutcase?”

  His eyes bulged. “Hello? Did you not just hear his story?”

  “I heard it.”

  “Then you have to know he’s off his rocker.”

  “I don’t think he is.”

  “So you think his cousin is being held captive by some rebel, machine gun–wielding college sorority?”