Good Vibrations (Welcome to Paradise)

by S. L. Scott

  His lips move against mine, and he says, “I want to be inside of you. I need to make love to you, baby. Can we leave?” My knees weaken and his embrace tightens. “I’ll take that as a yes.”

  We give quick goodbyes and launch our small dinghy back into deeper water to start the motor. We’re about half way back to the marina when he catches me staring at him again.

  Evan tilts his head, making eye contact with me. His tone is soft, concerned, and caring when he asks, “Are you happy?”

  “Very much,” I reply without hesitation.

  “I’m glad.”

  “Are you happy?”

  He runs a hand through his hair and briefly looks past me as he continues navigating the boat. His eyes flick back to mine, and he says, “Today was a great day. I haven’t felt this happy in a long time. It’s good. Life is good.”

  I smile, feeling the good vibrations growing stronger, and in this very moment, I’ve never been more happy.

  Chapter 21

  Mallory

  “I’ll give you a two count head start and then I’m coming after you.” His warning is not playful or teasing and is a direct threat to my girly bits. Suddenly, he slaps my ass and says, “Go.”

  It doesn’t matter that I’m tired from a day at the sandbar with the gang. My adrenaline kicks in, and I take off running without looking back. Giddy mixed with a little fear sends me straight into the pool. He jumps in over my head. With anxious anticipation, I wait for him to surface as I hold tight to the edge. He stays under longer than I expect, but then I finally see his darkened figure swimming under water towards me. My swaying legs cross underneath the water in sex protection mode. He grabs my hips, pulls me under, and kisses me. I relax after taking hold of his shoulders, and we break the waters’ surface together. Our tongues mingle as I wrap my arms around his neck and he presses me against the side of the pool.

  Breathing much heavier and with a much huskier tone, he says, “You have entirely too many clothes on.”

  He pulls my shirt off and gets my shorts undone with precision and speed. Tossing them both onto the nearby grass, he turns back and tugs each string of my bikini one by one until it’s untied, letting it fall to the ground. He leans forward to kiss me, hard with determination and passion. His roaming hands glide over my naked body until he finds my hand and takes it, pressing my palm against his cock that is clearly ready to bust out of his shorts.

  Together our hands rub him, and I groan in desire, not able to stop myself. I start pulling at the drawstring to rid his body of this barrier. Just as his breaths turn to pants he stills my hand. He leans into my neck, nipping his way up to my ear, and says, “I’ll be right back. I need to get a condom and towels.”

  He swiftly lifts up on the side of the pool, and I ogle the muscles in his arms as he does. He dashes away, but stops and looks back. “Don’t start without me, baby.”

  “You better hurry up then,” I say as seductively as I can muster and add a moan for good measure. With my back to him, I hear him running and the opening of his door.

  Just as I giggle, the shaking of ice against the sides of a glass grabs my attention. I turn in the direction of the sound and when I find it, I also hear a female voice. “I’m glad to hear my son is smart enough to wear a condom.”

  My heart and breathing stop in unison as I watch a very petite, slender golden blonde-haired woman stand from one of the chaise loungers facing the ocean. She finishes what appears to be the last of her drink and stares at me in the pool. I drop one of my arms over my chest which I know is visible through the water and with the other arm I hold the cement edge to keep me afloat.

  She puts a hand on her hip. “I’m Mrs. Ashford and this is my pool that you’re skinny dipping in.” She walks around the far side of the pool as I remain in place—speechless and mortified. Stopping opposite of me, she stares down as if a thought has occurred, but doesn’t voice it.

  Delving down deep, I find the one tiny nerve I have left and start to say, “I’m—”

  “Shhhh!” she says, holding her hand up towards me to shush me. “I don’t need your name, your life story, or why you felt the need to contaminate my pool by having sexual intercourse with my son in it. I just want you gone.”

  I’m embarrassed, but turn when I hear Evan. “Mother?” She turns toward him and watches as he stands above me. “When did you get in?”

  “Evan.” Her tone is as chilly as the ice that tings against her fancy glass. “I landed a few hours ago. I’m tired and I’m going to bed. We’ll discuss things in the morning.”

  “All right.” His reply has no emotion attached.

  She grabs the handle of the back door, and says, “And, Evan?”

  “Yes?”

  “Make sure your friend doesn’t stay the night and please don’t make me have to drain the pool.”

  “Mallory is staying the night.” But his words fall on deaf ears as the door slams closed behind her. “Hey,” he says, squatting down next to me.

  Lowering a little further into the water, I can’t muster any gumption as shame fills me. “Can I have a towel please?”

  “Sure.”

  I use the steps in the corner, wrapping the towel around my body as I emerge from the pool. Walking towards the guesthouse, he takes me by the arm to stop me. “Hey, it’s okay. You don’t have to leave.”

  “Evan, you heard her. She doesn’t want me here—”

  “But, I do.”

  I finally have the courage to look up to meet his eyes although tears fill mine. “She thinks I’m one of your skanks. You haven’t told her about me and—”

  “Have you told your parents about me?” He searches my eyes for the answer he already possesses. “No? Why haven’t you told them about me?”

  “It’s different because you won’t be meeting them. I’m leaving in a month, so I didn’t think it mattered. But you knew I’d be—”

  He releases me, and stalks towards the beach.

  Shit! Realizing how that sounded, I feel horrible. “Evan! Wait!” I jog after him, holding the towel tightly around me. “Stop! Please. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it like that.”

  He does stop, but an instant later I kind of wished he hadn’t. He turns and looks at me, hurt written all over his face. “It doesn’t matter because I’m just the here and now, right? I’m just a summer fling to you and a dirty secret to your friends and family. What the fuck, Mallory? I thought… this whole past week…” He runs both his hands through his hair and then knots his fingers at the crown of his head and turns to face the ocean. “I thought this meant something more to you too.” He sits down on the sand and pulls his knees toward his chest then drops his head.

  I sigh in frustration. I’m frustrated with myself, and I’m a lot frustrated with what just happened with his mother. Sitting down next to him, I whisper, “You mean more to me than that. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for it to sound like—”

  “You said exactly what you were thinking and I got burned by one of the qualities I admire in you the most—your honesty.” He finally looks over at me, and says, “I think over the course of this past week, deep down, I’d hoped that maybe I would mean enough to you to stay beyond the summer, but I can tell that’s not where you’re head is at right now. I understand that your school, your friends, your family, all that’s back in Colorado waiting for your return.” His voice is steady and cold. I can almost see his walls go up as his eyes focus into the distance. “I get it. Your life is there and mine is here. I was just being stupid. That’s all.”

  I touch his arm, but he flinches, clearly not wanting to be touched by me. “Evan, you aren’t being stupid, but you’re right, my life is there and I can’t change that now.” The distance between Hawaii and Colorado is too far for my liking, causing the distance between us emotionally to grow. My heart hurts over the thought of leaving him. I’ve grown too attached to him.

  “Fuck, let’s not do this.” He stands abruptly and looks down at me. “I told you I
get it, all right.” He takes a step back, away from me. “I think I should take you to Sunny’s tonight.”

  “Why?” I demand, jumping to my feet.

  He searches my eyes once again then turns to walk away from me. “Grab your stuff and I’ll drive you back.”

  “No! You’re not pulling this bullshit with me. Stop walking away, Evan!” I run up behind him and grab his arm to stop him, needing him to face me. “Look at me, damn it!”

  His head tilts to the side and out of the corner of his eyes, he looks at me. But I can see this conversation is pointless. He’s already withdrawn from me, and it’s probably best if I just give him time. But this hurts and I care too much for him. I want to fight for him. My selfish side just wants him to hold me again and make me feel better.

  As I follow him inside, I stop and drop the towel. I’m shameless. “I’m not fucking leaving, so you can just get that right out of your mind.”

  I watch as he walks in silence to his dresser and pulls boxers from it. He tosses me the same pair that I had given him to wear a week ago. He strips his wet shorts off and slips on another pair. Without warning, he demands, “Why the fuck do you have some other guy’s boxers?” He walks back to the second drawer and pulls out two t-shirts and once again, tosses me one and then pulls one over his head.

  I remain there dumbfounded by his lack of attention to my nakedness and by his line of questioning.

  “Those shorts are mine. They aren’t some guy’s. I like to sleep in boxers at home—”

  “By home, you mean Colorado, not Sunny’s?”

  It’s clear what he’s getting at. “You knew I was leaving. I’m a senior. I would lose credits if I transferred now.”

  He yanks his cargo shorts up and walks over to the door after putting on his flip-flops. He doesn’t look at me, but says, “I’ll wait for you in the car.”

  “Fuck you, Evan!” I yell.

  He pauses, but then walks away.

  I’m so pissed that I throw the t-shirt on haphazardly and storm across the lawn to grab my wet clothes and bathing suit. I stomp my way to the car with my mind reeling in anger. The door is already propped open and he’s sitting in his seat with the car running. Tossing my soaked clothes onto his carpeted floorboard, I make a production of getting in then slamming the door shut. He glares at the clothes that we both know are drenching his carpet and backs out leaving tread marks at the end of his driveway.

  I try to calm my pounding heart. I don’t want to fight with him, and garnering some logic, I decide to try a different approach. “Evan?”

  Nothing.

  “We need to talk about what’s going on here,” I say, trying to stay calm.

  “I think we’ve said enough already.”

  “Well, I don’t—”

  “Well, I don’t want to fucking hear it. How about that?”

  I flinch when he yells, the car feeling way too small to contain this important of a conversation. Turning toward the window, the beauty of the crashing waves mimic the way his words hurt my heart. Silence is the best tactic, and I remain that way the rest of the ride.

  He slams on the brakes, coming to an abrupt halt when he pulls into the parking space near the apartment.

  After taking a slow deep breath, I try again, attempting to keep my voice from shaking. “Your mother started this. You realize that she ruined tonight, don’t you?” He shakes his head before resting it against the window. “You were happy. We were happy. Evan, we were about to have sex until—”

  Sitting straight up, he slams his fists onto his steering wheel, and yells, “Fuck, Mallory! I told you not to do this. But you have to push, always with the fucking pushing. My mother didn’t ruin this! You did!”

  “I didn’t say she ruined ‘this’,” I correct him, swaying my hand between us while a sinking feeling sets in. Barely above a whisper, I say, “I said she ruined tonight, not us.” I sit there staring at him, waiting for a response, but his emotions are void of true feelings. My voice is trembling as I let the words fall from my mouth. “Are we over?”

  He doesn’t look at me, but it’s more that he won’t look at me. I watch him and my breathing catches as everything begins to move in slow motion. He rubs his eyes with the heel of his palms and turns away from me, hiding his face.

  I’m confused by how this day took such a drastic and harsh turn. Opening my door, I get out before he has a chance to stop me, needing a cigarette like yesterday. He jumps out and runs after me, grabbing me by the arms. “We’re not over—”

  “Then why does it feel like we are?” I lost hope in us, and the stress of my life falling apart makes me crave a nicotine relaxer.

  Sounding just as hopeless as I feel, he asks, “Why are we so bad at this?”

  This might be a rhetorical question, but I feel the need to respond anyway. “I don’t know, but it doesn’t seem like it should be this hard.” I start walking for the door again. As I near, I can see Sunny and Zach sitting on the couch talking, laughing, and basically making it look so fucking easy.

  “Mallory, I only wanted us to talk tomorrow. I don’t want us to be over, but what you said… or slipped up and said, it’s how you feel and it might not be good for me to think that this can be more than it is.”

  This is one of those times I wish I hadn’t wanted to talk it out. Why couldn’t I have left it until tomorrow? We wasted so much time not communicating before and now I try and it backfires. Fuck, I hope I have a cigarette inside.

  He lifts my chin up. “Get some rest. It’s been a long day. We can talk again tomorrow.”

  I feel like I’m going to throw up. He leans toward me with his lips lingering against my temple before he finally pulls back. This is it, I can feel it.

  “Goodbye, Mallory.”

  I watch, unable to move, as he shoves his hands in his pockets and walks back to his car.

  As he gets in, I rush around the corner and lean against the front door, praying he can’t see me. I slide down the door in agony as my heart is ripped from my chest by the string that had bound us together just an hour earlier. The imagery of it dragging behind him makes my chest ache all the more. I drop my head between my knees and cry.

  I cry because of this fucked up situation. I cry because of his mother. I cry because I don’t have a cigarette. But mostly, I cry because the only man I’ve ever truly been in love with just left me.

  Chapter 22

  Mallory

  I give myself all of three minutes before I stand up, dust the dirt off of my ass, and enter the apartment. Zach and Sunny both look up from the couch, surprised to see me.

  “Hey there,” Zach says, smiling like his usual happy self.

  Sunny takes a second to analyze me before she asks, “Have you been crying?” She stands up and rushes over to me.

  I nod, embarrassed to be breaking down in front of Zach.

  “What happened?” she asks.

  “I don’t…” I stop to choke down a sob not seeming to be able to get out what I want to say. “I can’t talk about it.”

  She strokes my hair back off my forehead, and says, “Is it Evan? Did he hurt you?”

  I stare at her not sure if she means physically or emotionally. She’s seen the emotional damage from him already, but she should know he would never physically hurt me. Hell, he’s Zach’s best friend, of course, he wouldn’t.

  “We broke up.”

  “What?” Zach stands up and exclaims. “That makes no sense.”

  “Well,” I start, but my voice wavers. “I’m not sure, but I think we did. It’s all just so messed up. We’re messed up.” I throw my hands into the air, exasperated.

  Walking back to my bag, I squat down and dig through it, but am still not able to find a cigarette. I go into the kitchen and dig one out of the emergency pack hidden in a coffee mug in the cabinet and grab the lighter from the TV stand.

  I head to the sliding glass door and let myself out. After settling into one of the plastic chairs, I light up and inhale
the nicotine. Right now, this might actually be better than an orgasm.

  Sunny and Zach are mumbling to each other inside, probably debating who’s going to come out and have to talk to me. “Save yourselves the trouble. I don’t want to talk anyway,” I shout to make it easier on them.

  Silence fills the air then Zach appears in the doorway. Guess he lost.

  “Mallory, I’ve been meaning to catch up with you lately.” He tries for casual, but his body is stiff, uncomfortable as he makes his way out the door. “You know, me and Evan actually have a pretty cool bond for guys. We have similar backgrounds and—”

  “So I should warn Sunny to stay away from you before you two end up a complete mess like me and Evan?”

  “I’ll let that slide because you and Evan are a lot alike.” He takes a deep breath and noisily exhales before starting again. “Listen, I want to say something wise and helpful here, but I don’t know what to say other than you have turned Evan’s world upside down.” I sit up, wanting to hear more as the rain picks up to a steady mist. “He’s different with you… since you’ve been here. He’s better somehow and I thought he was pretty fucking cool before. People say some bad stuff about him, but it’s not who he is on the inside.”

  “Who is he then, Zach?” I stand up and walk closer, standing under the awning for shelter. Lowering my voice, I plead, “Please tell me who he is because I thought we were good and then I said something stupid. The walls went up and he shut me out.” I feel bad all over again and try to explain. “I apologized, but he wasn’t hearing it.”

  “He’s stubborn, but he heard you. Sometimes he just needs time to process stuff.”

  “I met his mother.”

  He looks at me with a raised eyebrow. “Oh! How’d that go?”

  “Not good. I want to blame her, but really, we should have been more open with our expectations.” I smile to myself. “He can be very distracting.”