Life's a Witch

by Val St. Crowe

  Or maybe it was just that I was a girl too, and therefore less threatening, and so it was easier to flirt with me.

  It could also just be because I was the only one making eye contact.

  Logan and Reid already had their IDs out. I got mine out of my purse.

  She checked all the IDs with a tiny flashlight. “Okay, great,” she said, cracking her gum. “It’s five each for the guys. Ladies are free.” She winked at me again.

  Why was I free? What was up with that?

  Reid peeled a ten out of his wallet. “I got this.”

  Logan looked annoyed. “I don’t need you to—”

  “I said I was bankrolling this. I’m bankrolling this.” Reid handed over the money.

  “Have a great night,” said the woman, waggling her fingers at us.

  Reid started up the ramp.

  Logan and I exchanged a glance.

  Then I went after Reid.

  Logan brought up the rear.

  At the top of the ramp, the entirety of the club was laid bare. It was a large room with several levels. Steps went up and down into pits below various stages, which were at different heights.

  There were three stages. One at the front, the highest, that stretched across the entire room. There were three poles spaced out along that stage.

  There were two other stages on the sides. At one, a woman with dark hair was dancing. But she was still clothed. I mean, she was still in her bra and undies anyway. As I watched, she went over to the pole and wrapped her legs around it. She hung upside down.

  Huh. That didn’t look easy. I cocked my head to one side.

  Reid hit me on the arm. “Petra, stop drooling.”

  “I’m not drooling.” I glared at him.

  Reid pointed to a booth. “Let’s sit there.”

  “Why are we sitting down?” I said. “Shouldn’t we find a vampire?”

  “Someone will come to us,” said Logan, already starting for the booth.

  “How do you know that?” I said, trailing after him.

  “That’s how strip clubs work,” said Logan. “Strippers don’t make money by dancing on the stages, they make it giving lap dances. When they aren’t on the pole, they come out on the floor and try to upsell people sitting there.”

  I hurried to catch up to him. “Well, you know a lot about how this works.”

  He didn’t say anything.

  We reached the booth and Logan slid inside first.

  I sat down next to him. “You come to see strippers often?”

  “No,” said Logan, staring at the table. “But in my line of work, I end up in places like this a lot.”

  Reid sat down opposite us.

  “What line of work? Monster killing?” I said. “Why does monster killing mean you have to go to strip clubs?”

  Logan rubbed his forehead. “Can we do this later, Petra?”

  Reid laughed. “Oh, hell, is there trouble in paradise?”

  Logan shut his eyes and sighed.

  I tried to think about this. Was it awful if Logan had come to a strip club before? Like, for fun?

  Yeah, it was, kind of. Because…

  Well, because the Logan I knew wasn’t like that. He didn’t do that. I was only the third woman he’d ever had sex with, and he’d spent most of his life obsessed with Clarke. Logan was loyal. Excruciatingly loyal, so this idea of his ogling naked women on display, it was out of character, and if he had—

  “Hey, hey!”

  I looked up.

  A woman in an orange corset with her hair in pigtails was sitting down next to Reid.

  Reid peered down into her ample cleavage and then abruptly looked away. To the table, “You mind telling us why you work here?”

  The stripper laughed, sounding confused. “What?” She winked at me. “Hey, I’m Callisto.”

  What was with everyone winking at me? Seriously. It was making me very uncomfortable.

  Logan straightened and leaned across the table. “Callisto, let’s cut to the chase. We’re not looking for a lap dance. We’re looking for something else. It’s unconventional—”

  “All three of you at once?” said Callisto. “No problem.” She looked at me again and ran her tongue over the top of her teeth.

  Ugh. But… disturbingly, I was a little aroused. I kind of hated this place.

  “No,” said Logan.

  “Definitely not,” said Reid. “Look, all I’m wondering is if you chose this line of work because you were abused by your uncle or because you’re in terrible financial straits or—”

  “Callisto, we’re looking to buy vampire blood,” said Logan.

  Callisto sat back in the booth, looking puzzled. “What would you want with that?”

  “It’s for a spell,” said Logan. He jerked his thumb at me and then at Reid. “Mage students. Ravenridge. You interested or not?”

  “Well, I’m not a vampire,” said Callisto. “So, I guess not.” She turned to Reid. “Maybe you’d be interested in a private dance?”

  Reid swallowed. “No,” he said in a wooden voice. “No, I would not.”

  Callisto shrugged. “I’ll send Sapphira over. She might be able to help you.” She got up and left the table.

  Reid sagged against the back of the booth. “Petra, would you continue to be my friend if I just bought one dance with one of them? I would seriously overpay. Like triple the regular amount, and that would make up for—”

  “For what?” I said. “For the fact that you’re scarring her psyche for all time?”

  “Her psyche might already be scarred,” said Reid.

  I just shook my head at him.

  “It could be,” said Reid. “Couldn’t it?”

  Logan rubbed his temples like he was getting a headache.

  “Okay,” said Reid quietly. He heaved a huge sigh and bowed his head.

  A woman in a tiny black tank top and short skirt approached us.

  “Sapphira?” I said.

  “Nope, sugar,” she said in a rich, maple-syrup voice, “I’m Beah. I’m just here to see if you guys want anything to drink.”

  “We’re fine, thanks,” said Logan, waving her off.

  “Sure thing,” said Beah. “Flag me down if you change your mind.”

  I turned to Logan. “Maybe we call your friend in Sea City, huh? Maybe we just leave, because this place—”

  “Hi.” A woman leaned over the table, putting her hands down in front of me. She was wearing a purple corset and fishnets. She looked us over. “I’m Sapphira. Come with me.”

  Great, okay, well, I guessed if this was going to be over soon, that was good.

  I got up, and Reid and Logan did too.

  Sapphira led us over the floor, past the stages and the poles and down a hallway, where there were several different rooms with open doors. She pushed us into the first room. It was walled in mirrors, and there was a deep cushion, like a couch, but possibly deep enough to be a bed, running around three sides of the room. She gestured. “Have a seat.”

  We sat.

  She shut the door and then she marched directly over to me. She put both of her hands on my shoulders, and then she pressed her breasts into my face.

  I sputtered.

  “Whoa,” said Reid, who was on his feet.

  She turned to him. “Sit down. Hands down. No touching unless we’ve negotiated that.”

  “Um,” I said. “Can you?” I gestured.

  She backed away from me.

  “What did Callisto tell you we wanted?” said Reid.

  “She wasn’t specific,” said Sapphira. “She said you needed a vampire. I assumed we’d start with a dance, and if we wanted to work up to—”

  “No,” said Reid.

  “No,” said Logan.

  “No?” said Sapphira.

  Was there an echo here?

  She drew her brows together. “So, um, what was it you wanted?”

  A yell in the distance. “Help!”

  I got up. “What was that?”
/>
  “Sit down,” said Sapphira.

  I heard it again. A distant cry for help. Ignoring the vampire stripper, I darted across the room and opened the door. I peered out into the hallway. All I saw were doors, some open, some closed. There were maybe ten rooms down this hallway, five on each side.

  “Help!” It was louder now.

  I stepped into the hallway.

  “Look, you had better tell me what it is you want,” said Sapphira, who was just behind me.

  I started walking down the hallway, still ignoring her. Someone needed help, and I was going to figure out who.

  “You hear that, right?” Logan was saying.

  I turned to see that he was talking to Sapphira. They were standing in the doorway.

  Sapphira sighed. “Well, yes, it probably is a problem. But why don’t you go back into the room, and I’ll take care of it?”

  “Help, please, someone!” came the cry again.

  I turned in the direction of the sound and opened the door directly ahead of me. It opened onto a room like the one we’d been in, but in this one, there was a man lying on the floor and there were three women on top of him. One at his neck, two at his wrists. I could smell blood.

  The man locked eyes with me. “Help. They won’t stop.”

  Sapphira rushed past me, into the room. “Off of him!” she thundered.

  No response from the vampires that were drinking the man’s blood.

  I hurried into the room, Logan right behind me.

  Distantly, I could hear Reid calling, “Hey, where did you guys go?”

  I pointed at one of the vampires and used talisman magic to pick her up and pull her off the man. I made her fly through the air and collide with the cushiony-thing that ran around the room.

  She turned on me, hissing, her fangs out.

  I conjured a sword and pointed it at her. “How about you put those away, or you’re going to be headless?”

  “Hey,” said Sapphira, “there’s no need for death threats. This happens sometimes. The girls get carried away. But no one’s been seriously hurt.”

  “Tell that to the guy on the floor,” I said. I glanced over my shoulder at him. The other two vampires were still latched on, even though Logan had one by the arm, a knife to the back of her neck.

  “Let go,” Logan said to her in a quiet voice.

  “Who are you people?” said Sapphira.

  Vampire number one, the chick I’d yanked off the man, suddenly beckoned to me.

  I found myself being tugged through the air toward number one. She was using magic on me. I swung my sword.

  But she flicked her wrist and her magic tugged my weapon out of my hand. I came to a halt directly in front of her. She ran her fingers over my neck. “You ruined my dinner,” she said, and she used magic to pull me close. Her teeth sank into my neck.

  Damn it, that hurt.

  And at that moment, I noticed the skitters that my conjuring had called. They were crawling down over the mirrored ceiling, coming straight for me.

  CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

  Abruptly, the vampire with her teeth in my neck jerked her head back, her fangs coming out of me.

  “Hey, not cool,” came Reid’s voice.

  I looked over my shoulder at him. He was standing in the doorway to the room. He made a quick gesture with his hand, twisting it.

  The vampire’s neck snapped. She fell to a heap on the floor.

  I put my hand to my bleeding neck.

  “You’re welcome,” said Reid, stepping inside the room.

  I turned back to see that there were no more vampires on the man. He was panting and scrambling backward.

  The other two vampires, number two and number three, were circling Logan, who had a knife out, glaring at both of them.

  Sapphira was walking around behind numbers two and three, talking in a quiet voice that I couldn’t make out entirely. “…think about this… not worth it,” came snatches of her whispers.

  The skitters dropped down onto everyone. They landed on my head, Reid’s shoulders, on the vampires, and on Logan.

  I shook mine off, conjuring a gun. I shot the one on the floor.

  Reid knocked his off too. I shot that one.

  The vampires screamed, trying to get the things off. The skitters fell down onto the floor, but I couldn’t shoot at those skitters without possibly hitting Logan. I muttered swear words under my breath.

  And more skitters were coming, because I’d conjured that gun.

  I could see them crawling in the doorway, their feet clicking against the floor.

  Logan leaped on vampire number two, and they went down on the floor, grappling with each other. Logan’s knife went into her neck, but it wasn’t a big blade, and it didn’t do enough damage.

  Number two yanked it out, screaming.

  “Stop it, stop it!” yelled Sapphira. “And what are those things?” She pointed at the skitters.

  I handed Reid my gun. “Take care of the fucking skitters.” I ran for Logan.

  But number three grabbed me instead, digging long fingernails into my upper arm. “What the hell is your problem?”

  I punched her in the face.

  Her fingers splayed out.

  Her magic caught me in the stomach. I went down on the floor, oomphing as if I’d been punched in the gut. I looked up at her and did Reid’s little manuever, using magic to snap her neck.

  She went down.

  But now number one had recovered. Snapping a vampire’s neck didn’t kill her, after all, and this one seemed to have healed up pretty fast. She was getting up.

  In the distance, I could hear gunfire, Reid shooting the skitters.

  Where was Logan?

  I turned to look. He was beneath number two, who had straddled him and had one hand spanning his neck, pinning him down. Damn it. Logan’s knife was lying on the floor, just out of his reach—

  I was in the air again. Fucking vampire number one had me with her magic. She slammed me into the ceiling. Hard. It cracked the mirror up there.

  I groaned.

  Then she slammed me back down again.

  I hit hard again, and it hurt like hell. I let out a cry of pain and rage. I used talisman magic to pick up the sword I’d conjured and I sent it hurtling through the air at her.

  It hit her in the midsection and pinned her against the cushion, her back bent backwards like she was doing something gymnastic.

  I turned back to Logan, but he’d managed to turn the tables on the other vampire and get his knife back. He plunged it into her heart, and she went still.

  There. All the vampires were down for the count. All the skitters were gone.

  “What the hell?” said Sapphira.

  “Thank you,” said the man.

  Logan got to his feet. Reid stalked back to the center of the room. I came over as well.

  Logan pointed his bloody knife at Sapphira. “We’re taking some vampire blood from these three, okay?”

  “We’ll pay,” chirped Reid, taking out his wallet.

  *

  Now in possession of a container of vampire blood, we trooped across the parking lot to Logan’s car, all of us silent. I felt strange. A little grossed out, but also a little bit worked up. That could have been because of the fight, I didn’t know. But there was something about being in a place that was so sexually charged that affected me.

  I didn’t know if I liked it or not. I felt guilty about it. I knew that strippers were designed to make people feel aroused, but I figured that I would be above all that. Besides, it wasn’t like I was into girls or anything, so why was it making me feel…?

  Yuck.

  “God, that was the worst trip to the strip club ever,” Reid said as he got into the back seat. “Of course, I always forget how shitty trips to the strip club are, anyway. It’s all frustrating.”

  Logan jammed the keys into the ignition and started the car.

  Reid kept talking as Logan pulled the car out of the parking lot. “I m
ean, it’s just stupid is what it is. It’s nothing. You get worked up and then you can’t do anything, and… at least, usually, I get a lap dance, but all I got was to watch that chick grind on Petra for two seconds, and that was weird, because Petra is like my sister, and—”

  “No, she’s not,” hissed Logan.

  “Hey, sorry,” said Reid in a quiet voice.

  “You think I forget the history,” said Logan, glaring out the windshield. “I don’t.”

  “Yeah, but it’s history,” said Reid. “Like ancient history, and I don’t even think of Petra as, like, a girl except—”

  “Spare me,” growled Logan.

  “Logan,” I said. “Don’t be like that.”

  Logan just shook his head. “Whatever.”

  We were all quiet again.

  “Maybe just let me out,” said Reid. “Maybe I’ll head back there. Maybe I don’t care about paying for sex after all.”

  I turned around in the front seat to face him. “Reid!”

  “What?” he said. “My life is shit, or had you not noticed?”

  “Well, after we fought three of the girls and bled them out, I doubt they’re going to be welcoming anyway,” I snapped.

  “Figures,” muttered Reid.

  “I’ll let you out,” said Logan. “That’s just fine. I’ll drop you off and you can teleport your ass home. I don’t care who you fuck as long as you never look at Petra like that again.”

  My eyes widened. Whoa, what?

  In the back seat, Reid laughed. “Okay, insecure much, Logan?”

  “Fuck you,” said Logan, and he pulled the car over.

  “Guys,” I said, looking between the two of them. “Don’t. Whatever you’re doing, don’t.”

  Logan turned to me. “Stay out of this, Petra.”

  “Out of it? It’s about me.” I gaped at him. Was he insane?

  “I didn’t do that,” said Reid. “I didn’t look at her, like… like anything.”

  Logan let out a disbelieving, harsh laugh.

  “I didn’t,” said Reid.

  “I thought you were going to get out,” said Logan.

  “Logan!” I was aghast. Why was he being like this?

  “You want me out?” said Reid. “Yeah, sure, fine.” He opened the car door.

  “Reid, stay in the car,” I ordered. I put my finger in Logan’s face. “I don’t know what your problem is, but get over it. There’s no reason to be jealous of Reid.”