I’m not sure if she’s feeling this way too but we both look over at each other at the same time and our eyes lock. For a brief moment, everything is perfect.
“Thanks again for coming tonight.” I’m struggling to find the right thing to say.
“With everything you’ve done for me, I wouldn’t have missed this for the world.”
I hold my breath, lean over towards her and lightly place a kiss on her cheek. She turns her face towards me and brings her lips to mine. The kiss is soft but passionate and I let myself get lost with her for a moment. We separate for air then immediately begin kissing again. This time, I bring both of my hands up and place them behind her neck and tilt her head at an angle. Jennifer steps closer into my body and I can’t help but press into her. I don’t mean to but I’m caught up in the moment and everything feels so right between us. When we finally pull apart, I can’t help but notice I’ve caused a little excitement down below. I would give anything to be able to shift the bulge that has formed in my pants but I would die if she noticed that I got a little turned on. Who knew that a kiss from her could stir this kind of feeling inside me?
“You about ready to head back?” I ask, not really wanting to end this moment but I know it’s getting late. I don’t feel the alcohol anymore and feel it’s safe for me to drive us now.
“I suppose.” She takes a deep breath and then asks. “Will you bring me back out here again sometimes? I would love to be able to see what this looks like during the day. Don’t get me wrong, it’s beautiful out here tonight, but I bet it’s just as stunning in the day when there are boats out on the water.”
“I would love to.” I’m like a kid again, grinning from ear to ear, knowing she didn’t mind our kiss and wants to spend more time together.
Instead of taking her hand again, we walked side by side and our arms would occasionally brush against each another. I hope she’s truly enjoyed tonight because I know I have and wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world. We get back to the truck and I open the door for her. Before she climbs up inside, she turns to face me again and it’s this moment that makes the night complete.
Without hesitation, she closes the gap between us and our lips come together again for another kiss. I can’t get over how soft and tender her lips are. This time, I take the kiss a little further and slip my tongue inside her mouth tracing it along her teeth. She pulls me nearer and I hear a soft whimper escape her mouth. I can’t help but place my hands on the small of her pack and pull her closer towards me. The kiss intensifies quickly and I notice the arousal below is back. I’m sure she feels this too since our bodies are so close. We pull away for air, and I’m, once again, bringing her towards me again. I can’t get enough of her. I let me hand fall to just above her butt while I keep the other on the back of her shoulder. She presses herself against me and I feel her lifting her leg up and wrapping it around my leg. This moment is priceless. I’ve wanted to do this for so long now but knew nothing needed to happen between until she was ready. Now, I can’t believe I’ve waited for so long. I’ve felt there was something between us, I just never knew if she was willing to act on it. The sound of her phone ringing quickly ends this passionate moment.
Jennifer digs around in her purse searching for the phone. She pulls it out just as the phone call ends.
“Hmm. I don’t recognize this number. I wonder who would be calling me this late.” I can tell her tone has changed already.
In another moment, the phone rings again. This time she asks if I think she should answer it, and I shrug my shoulders, not knowing what she should do.
“It’s up to you, especially since you don’t know the number.”
“Hello.”
I can tell no one says anything on the other end.
“Hello.” She says into the phone again.
Suddenly, her eyes become watery, and she quickly turns off the phone.
“Baby, what’s wrong. You didn’t say anything.” I’m quick to place my hands on her shoulders to comfort her.
“Damn it.” She says. “It was him. It was Brian. He said my name just as I was about to hang up. I thought this was over now.”
She drops her head and brings her hands up to cover her face and the moment of passion between us is definitely over this evening. I hold her and let her sob. I wish there was something I could do. Brian cannot keep doing this to her. I help her climb inside the truck and close the door for her. The mood has changed but I’m not about to let that jerk ruin the night for us. Jennifer deserves to be happy and if I have to find that son of a bitch and tell him how I feel, I will.
Todd pulls out of the parking lot to drive us home and I’m saddened that the phone call ruined the evening. Everything was going so well, including the kiss we shared. I was completely caught off guard but it was definitely a moment I truly enjoyed. I’ve felt emotions for Todd for some time now but never knew if he felt the same way. It’s obvious now that there are feelings on his part too but I have to wonder if I’m ready to jump into another relationship this soon.
“I wish there was something I could say to make you feel better.” Todd says and I look over at him as he drives us home.
“I’ll be okay. It’s just that it’s been a while since I’ve heard anything from him. Getting the call from my attorney sort of gave me the closure I needed, but I guess it didn’t mean he would stop calling.”
“I’m sorry.”
“It’s not your fault. Just when I start to feel better about it all, he has to ruin everything. Why can’t he just go away?”
“Eventually he will stop. I can’t believe the only thing he has been concerned about it is you. How many times has he asked about the baby? Does he even realize you’ve had her? He’s so hung up on you.”
Todd reaches for my hand again. There is such a difference between him and Brian. Todd is almost too perfect and is every girl’s dream. But no, I pick the loser. How did I allow myself to get involved with him? I guess if I had never met Brian, then I never would have met Todd either. But, dang it, I sure hate knowing I’ve had to endure all of this just to get to the point I’m at today. And then there’s Chloe. Even though I don’t regret having my daughter, I’ve still got to live with the fact that Brian is her biological father despite the fact he will never be a part of her life. It’s just sad he has chosen this path for himself. It would be one thing for us to have realized we couldn’t make it as a couple, lots of people experience this and go on about their lives remarrying and having visitation with their children, but Chloe doesn’t deserve to have a deadbeat father.
We don’t really say much the remainder of the drive home. And, thank goodness, my phone doesn’t ring anymore either. I don’t think I can put myself through another night of my phone ringing all night long. Even though it has been awhile since Brian has pulled this stunt, actually, when I had his phone disconnected it came to a halt, but I’m not looking forward to him having a phone again.
Todd pulls in the driveway and doesn’t turn the truck off. I’m sort of thankful for this, even though I’m sad the night is coming to an end.
“Thanks again for coming tonight.”
“You’re welcome.” I yawn, not realizing how tired I really am. “Maybe I’ll see you tomorrow?” I ask hoping he’ll pick up on this as an invitation instead of thinking I’m just making a general statement.
“I’d love that. I’ll call you.” He’s all smiles as I climb down from the truck. I turn around and wave goodbye then make my way to the porch. Todd doesn’t back out of the drive until I’m safely inside with the door locked.
The next morning, I roll over and notice the clock on the bedside table. It’s after eight in the morning. I quickly jump from bed and head over to the crib where Chloe is still asleep. I can’t believe she has slept the entire night. My mom had just put her down from her bottle when I got home last night. She said Chloe had been the perfect angel and she was so glad I decided to out of the house. I filled her in on the phone ca
ll from the lawyer’s office and she looked so relieved to know the nightmare was about to be put behind us. I didn’t tell her about the other phone call later on.
I hadn’t realized how tired I really was until I crawled into bed and I fell asleep instantly. Now, I’m feeling pretty rested and it feels good for a change. I’m sure getting a full night’s sleep has a lot to do with it. I have to wonder if this could be the start of Chloe sleeping longer hours during the night too. Wouldn’t that be nice for the both of us?
I think back to last night and the job opportunity Mr. Williams presented me with. Is this something I could consider? I know I can’t depend on my parents for their financial support forever and this could be my chance to do something different, to get back out in the workforce again instead of staying in the house all day. But then there is Chloe to think about. I think Beth would make a great sitter and she’s already offered numerous times to watch her long enough for me to run to town or just to get out for a little while. Looking back, maybe she was encouraging me to actually do something with Todd and I just didn’t pick up on it.
I could stand over the crib and watch my baby girl forever. Babies are just so precious and I am so lucky to have had a healthy, happy angel. Almost like she senses me, Chloe begins to stir so I go to the kitchen and prepare her bottle. It’s only a matter of time until she cries out letting me know she’s hungry. I flip the switch on the coffeepot and jump immediately when I hear the sound of my phone ringing. I’m definitely not expecting a phone call so early in the morning. I cringe, afraid to see who’s calling, but I figure it’s probably my mom checking in on me and the baby.
My face lights up when I see its Todd calling.
“Good morning.” I say into the phone.
“Morning to you too. I hope I’m not calling too early.” He sounds cheerful. “How did Chloe do last night?”
“She did great. My mom said she was the perfect little darling.”
“See, I told you that you didn’t have anything to worry about.”
“I know, but it’s still hard being away from her. I guess it’s good for my mom to spend some grandmother time with her since she won’t be here much longer.”
“My mom made some homemade blueberry muffins this morning. I was wondering if you’d like me to bring you one over.”
“Did she really? I bet they are delicious. I just put on a pot of coffee. If you don’t mind the way I look first thing in the morning, then come on over. I’m getting Chloe’s bottle ready now so we could eat after I finish feeding her.”
“Great. I’ll be over in a few minutes then.”
I dash back to the bedroom and quickly run a brush through my hair. Although it still looks halfway decent from last night, I make it a point to wash it daily even though I don’t get out of the house. I grab my toothbrush not wanting to have morning breath. I grab my bra and put it back on underneath my t-shirt and take a look at myself in the mirror. This is going to have to work for now. Just as I’m switching off the bathroom light, I hear knocking on the front door. Almost at the same time, Chloe begins to cry. I scoop her up and head to the front door.
“Morning.” Todd greets me as I open the door but I’m barely able to hear him over Chloe’s wails.
“Hey.” I manage to say as I take Chloe and place her against my shoulder and gently rock her.
“Is she okay?” Todd asks.
“Yea, she’s fine, just hungry. Can you believe she slept all night? I thought I could warm her bottle before she got up but she’s not wanting to compromise.”
“Let me put these down on the table and I’ll help you with her.” Todd offers as he puts a plate wrapped in plastic wrap down on the table.
“Are you sure?” I ask, finding it hard to believe Todd would be willing to take her. I would think most guys would want nothing to do with a screaming baby.
“Of course I’m sure. Let me see her.” I pass Chloe over to him and wait a moment to see if she calms down. “Go. Get her bottle ready. We’ll be fine.” Todd motions towards the kitchen.
I’m not sure why I’m so nervous about him having her. It’s not like he’s going to drop her or anything. I guess it’s just part of being a new mother and being overly cautious about who handles her. I back slowly into the kitchen and watch as he sits down on the couch with her. Todd has held her a few times, but like most men, they feel awkward with a baby and think they are easy to break.
I heat the water in the microwave then sit the bottle down in the warmed water. While I wait for the milk to lose its chill from being refrigerated, I pull two mugs down from the cabinet and set them down on the counter.
“Todd, what would you like in your coffee?” I call out to him in the living room but there is no answer. I walk to the doorway and realize he and Chloe are no longer in the room. I thought it got quiet rather suddenly but didn’t know he had left the room. I start to walk back to the bedroom, but he appears in the doorway, Chloe in his arms. And, she’s quiet.
For a brief moment, all I can do is stare at him, standing there holding her. I can’t believe how natural he looks with her in his arms.
“Everything okay?” I ask, not wanting him to notice my hesitation.
“Sure. She’s all better now.” Todd says in a baby talk kind of way as he tickles Chloe underneath her chin. He turns her around to face me and sure enough she’s as happy as can be. “I changed her diaper. It was pretty soaked, but got it all taken care of.”
“You’re kidding me, right? You changed her diaper? I couldn’t even get my dad to do that. He handed her back to me and said it was my responsibility.” I laugh a little as I share this with him.
“Well, had it been anything other than just wet, then I probably would have bargained with you, but I handled it just fine.”
We walk back into the kitchen and I check on her bottle. It feels ready now so I try to take her from him but he pulls back.
“I would have poured the coffee already but I didn’t know what you wanted in yours. Help yourself to the sugar and I’ve got milk and creamer in the refrigerator. I’ll get mine as soon as I finish feeding Chloe.”
“Why don’t you go ahead and fix you a cup and eat one of the muffins while they are still warm and I can feed her for you.”
“Todd, no. That’s my responsibility.” I tell him.
“Jenn, look. It’s okay to accept help from someone else. You don’t have to do everything on your own. Go ahead and eat and you can join us in the living room.”
“Are you sure? You’re okay with feeding her?” I am taken by surprise that he would volunteer to do this.
“We’ll be fine. You’ll be sitting in the same room.” Todd laughs. “If I do something wrong, you can correct me. Otherwise, I think I can handle this.”
I can’t help but notice the sparkle in his eyes this morning. I’m not sure what’s going on with us, but I’m starting to like where this is headed. The thought of a brand new relationship scares the hell out of me and I have to ask if I’m willing to place my friendship with Todd on the line in case this is not something either one of us are ready for. But I will admit, Todd is the complete opposite of Brian in every way.
I do as I’m told and pour my coffee. I grab a muffin and join Todd and Chloe in the living room. I am amazed how well Todd is handling her. When Chloe is about halfway done with her bottle, Todd tosses a cloth over his shoulder and brings Chloe up to begin burping her.
“Are you sure you’ve never done this?” I inquire. If I didn’t know any better I’d say he has either done this before or he got instructions from someone and is following them very well.
“Nope. Never done it before in my life.” He’s quick to respond, but I notice the little smirk that’s forming on his face.
“Ok. Please tell. There’s no way you would just automatically know to do this.”
“Well, maybe my mom did give me some pointers.” He admits.
“I knew it.” I can’t help but laugh. I take a bite of my m
uffin and I’m amazed at how delicious it tastes. “I knew there was more than you were letting on. I need to get the recipe for these muffins from Beth. They are so good.”
“Speaking of my mom, have you thought anything more about my dad’s offer?”
“I really haven’t yet. I crashed as soon as I laid down last night.” I’m really not sure what to say about the job. “Todd, I just don’t know how I feel about going back to work just yet. I think it’s a fabulous opportunity and I would love to work for you and your family. Your dad had it all planned out and I think it could work, but the thought of leaving Chloe just scares me. Nothing against your mother because I think she would be ideal for Chloe, but I just don’t know.”
“Please, don’t feel like you have to make a decision right now. Dad’s just trying to look out for the business. My mom is eager to be at home more and this is something they would feel good about. If you think now is not the time, it’s okay. I promise, they will understand.”
“I’m going to think about it some more.”
Todd finishes giving Chloe her bottle and bless her heart, she’s nearly gone back to sleep again. Babies are so lucky to sleep so much in the first years of their lives but it definitely changes the older they get. And when you become a parent, sleep is something you simply can’t get enough of.
I stand up and take Chloe from his arms, careful not to wake her. After putting her back in the crib, I turn to go back to the living room and notice Todd standing in the doorway leaning against the door frame. I stop in front of him and bring my eyes up to meet his.
“Come here.” He says, barely above a whisper.
He extends his arms out and I allow him to embrace me. I place my head on his shoulder and breathe in his scent. His embrace is strong, compassionate. I can’t help but feel so secure standing here with him.
Never Look Back (Coming Home Book 2) Page 14