Warrior of Fire

by Michelle Willingham

  Her body was aching and wet, needing to complete the act of lovemaking. She was beyond all thoughts of shame or hesitation. All she knew was that she wanted this man, and she believed with all her heart that she could change his mind.

  She ran her hands over his pectoral muscles, over his chest, and down his ribs. His manhood was erect and jutted out from his hips, and she imagined what it would be like to take him inside her. The very thought made her remember the intense pleasure Raine had given her earlier. She wanted to give the same back to him.

  ‘Lie down,’ she ordered, pressing him towards the bed. When he did, his erection rested against his stomach. It was so thick and hard, she couldn’t resist touching it with her palm. The look of fire in his eyes made it clear that he liked what she was doing. She stroked him, marvelling at the velvety heat of his shaft.

  As she continued to move her hand upon him, his face contorted as if she were tormenting him. ‘Am I hurting you? Shall I stop?’ She worried that she might be squeezing too hard.

  ‘It will only hurt if you do stop,’ he managed. As she stroked him, he began arching his hips in a rhythm. And she began to imagine how it would feel if he were thrusting within her.

  I want this. So badly.

  She paused a moment to straddle his body, then resumed what she was doing. He closed his eyes, and at that moment, she pressed his blunt head to her entrance. She was so aroused, the shallow invasion made her moan.

  Raine seized her waist and his green eyes had turned to stone. ‘Stop, Carice. You don’t want this. Not from a man like me.’

  In answer, she pushed herself lower, ignoring the slight pain as he breached her innocence. ‘Yes. I do.’ She surrendered her virginity to the man she wanted, binding him irrevocably to her.

  When he was buried deep inside her, there was no going back. Slowly, he sat up, remaining embedded inside her. ‘I never meant to claim you like this.’

  It was a strange sensation to be joined so intimately, but as she relaxed around him, it began to feel good. ‘I want this,’ she reminded him. ‘I want you.’

  He grasped her hips and lifted her up, as if to withdraw from her. She began to protest, but then he lowered her. She let out a gasp at the sensation.

  ‘Ride me,’ he commanded. ‘If this is what you want from me, then take it.’ It was clear that he didn’t want to force her into the lovemaking. But from the warmth in his voice, she understood that he wanted her, too.

  She felt awkward at first, but it was easier when she closed her eyes. ‘What should I do?’

  ‘Lift up on your knees and then lower yourself,’ he said. ‘Any way that feels good to you.’

  It went against everything she’d imagined, but she was making love to Raine, instead of the other way around. And slowly, she began to thrust upon him, shallow at first, and then deeper. Being in command made it easier to adjust to the soreness, and soon enough, she no longer cared. His hands moved up to cup her breasts, and he fingered her nipples as she moved up and down. When she sat upon him, leaning back slightly, he moved one hand down to her hooded flesh.

  The moment he caressed her there, she clenched his length. ‘Oh, Raine.’ She could hardly breathe, and it took an effort to continue her movement. The delicious friction was guiding her towards another release, and she wanted it so badly. He started to move within her, but she held his hips back. ‘Wait.’

  He understood what she wanted, and while they were joined, he sat up, still fingering her while he suckled her nipple. The burgeoning feelings were gathering up like a thunderstorm inside her, and she arched against him.

  ‘Let go,’ he ordered, ‘and let me feel you come apart. I want to be inside you when you feel your pleasure.’

  The wildness was gathering momentum, building up until she could hardly hold back the moans of excitement. She arched hard, welcoming the rushing sensations as they crashed over her. Her body was a liquid heat, pulsing around his shaft, and she bit back a scream as he thrust forward.

  This time, he rolled her onto her back, and she could only hold on as he drove himself inside her. The reckless fire was rising hotter, and she came apart once again as he plunged and withdrew. She scored his back with her fingernails, giving in to instinct, until at last, his breathing deepened, and he collapsed on top of her.

  Carice welcomed the weight of him, feeling beloved. Their bodies were still joined, and she held him close to her heart, unable to hold back her smile.

  ‘Thank you,’ she whispered, revelling in the touch of his body upon hers.

  She could feel his tension, but in answer, he leaned up and kissed her. The need to sleep overcame her, and she closed her eyes, letting go of all else but the welcome sanctuary of Raine’s arms.

  * * *

  He awakened a few hours later with Carice nestled against him. Their legs were tangled together, and the sleep softened the features of her face. He supposed he ought to feel remorse for taking advantage of her. And yet, all he could feel was grateful. For these few moments, he was at peace.

  She snuggled against him and opened her eyes. He waited to see if her expression would hold any regret. Instead, she sent him a quiet smile.

  ‘Are you hungry?’ he asked. ‘I brought you food earlier.’

  She nodded. ‘I think I distracted you from it. Why don’t you bring it here, and we’ll eat together?’

  He rose from the bed and fetched the tray. Upon it was bread, meat and cheese. He offered it to Carice, and she chose a piece of cheese. ‘There was a time when I ate nothing but bread.’

  He lay beside her while she ate, wanting her to have her fill before he touched any of it. ‘Why?’

  ‘The healer thought it would keep my stomach from hurting so much.’ She finished the cheese and reached for the meat. ‘It never did. There was a time when I tried not to eat because it hurt so much. Or perhaps I wanted to die, rather than wed the High King.’

  Raine reached out to touch her flat stomach, feeling his own tension tighten inside. He’d hated watching her be so ill, so weak. ‘You were starving yourself.’

  ‘It didn’t hurt as much when I refused food.’ She sent him a faint smile. ‘It was only when I spent time with you that I was able to eat without pain. At least until we stayed at the village.’

  He drew his hand over her skin, stroking it. It felt as if there was something he ought to understand, something that was causing her illness. ‘Were you ever well when you ate at home?’

  ‘Not often. And in the last year, I grew worse.’

  He still couldn’t let go of the suspicion that she’d been poisoned. If she’d had enemies within her father’s house, they might have tampered with her food to make her ill. There were many kinds of poison, some of which grew worse over time. Even if others had accidentally eaten her food, it might not have affected them with a smaller portion. Then, too, if she had lost a great deal of weight, even a slight amount of poison would be more potent.

  Yet, it didn’t explain why she had suddenly grown ill after they’d visited the village of Casheldrum. They had been alone, and there was no possible means of anyone poisoning her.

  Raine gave her more cheese and reached for the bread. He was about to offer it to her, when suddenly he remembered what she’d said before—that she had only eaten bread in the past year. He frowned at the thought and then asked, ‘Had you thought that it could be bread making you sick?’

  She broke into a laugh. ‘Don’t be foolish. Why would bread make me ill? I’ve eaten it all my life.’

  ‘You said your illness grew worse last year. And that was when you ate nothing but bread.’ He stared at her, thinking for a moment. ‘You ate no bread at the abbey, for we had none.’

  ‘But I ate a little at Laochre on the night I arrived. I was fine then.’

  ‘Until the next day,’ he reminded her. ‘An
d you had some at Casheldrum, didn’t you?’

  ‘The morning we left, yes.’ Her expression grew thoughtful, and he wondered if it was possible. She leaned back and regarded him. ‘But I cannot think that it has anything to do with my illness.’ Her breasts were soft pebbles in the cool air, and she burrowed closer to him. It took only seconds for him to grow rock hard.

  ‘Don’t eat any bread for a few weeks,’ he suggested. ‘See if that helps.’ There could be no harm in it. Her hands moved down to his hips as she pressed her body against his.

  ‘I could try, though I’m not sure it would do any good.’ Her hand wandered down his leg, and she brought her other arm around his neck. The posture brought her breasts into prominent view, and the distraction made him yearn to touch her again. He gave in to the urge and kissed one nipple, then the other.

  She moved her leg over his hip and said, ‘I’m cold, Raine.’

  ‘I know. That’s why I’m warming you.’ He covered her body with his own, still paying homage to her breasts. ‘I want you to be burning hot when I’ve finished.’

  She sent him a secret smile. ‘Have you decided to stay with me, then?’

  He didn’t answer her question, but drew her legs around his waist. His shaft was pressed against her intimately, and he rubbed against her. He didn’t want to face the fate that lay before them, and yes, he did want to stay with this woman. But it meant abandoning not only his sisters, but his lands and his people. He had to atone for his parents’ deaths, and he could not turn his back on them.

  ‘Please,’ she whispered, but he suspected she was not speaking of lovemaking. As he thrust inside her, she moaned, squeezing his length. Her blue eyes held his, and he slowed his pace, joining their bodies while he never took his gaze from her.

  ‘You haven’t answered my question,’ she prompted, raising her knees to take him deeper. He plunged inside her, using his mouth and hands to guide her towards the edge of desire, his fingers digging into her hips as she drove him past the brink of reason.

  No, he hadn’t answered her question. For there was no answer to give.

  * * *

  Carice offered no conversation at all when they left on the following morning. She had tried everything to convince Raine to stay with her, but his silence was damning. He didn’t bother hiding their pathway now, and she was well aware of the sun spearing her eyes as they rode eastward.

  She would have to confront him soon. And though she knew he cared for her, by the way he’d made love to her and the way he kept glancing back to ensure she was all right, he didn’t love her. Not enough to give up his purpose.

  Her stomach ached again, but not because of food. It was from the knowledge that she couldn’t change him. This man had stolen her heart, and now he was about to break it. Carice tried to tell herself that there was still time, but she knew the truth—it was over now. She had to stop Raine before they rode any further.

  Halfway along their journey, she drew her horse to a stop. The sun was bright in the sky, gleaming across shadowed hills. ‘I want to know why you won’t speak to me, Raine.’

  ‘I find that there is little I can say to you,’ he said. ‘Our time together grows short.’

  ‘And you want to end it sooner by increasing the pace of our horses?’

  His shoulders lowered, and he finally drew his own mount to a stop. ‘Were it my choice, I would not leave you, Carice.’ The weight of his guilt was evident in his tone. ‘But I have wronged you. More than you know.’

  Her face softened at that, for at least he seemed reluctant to betray her. ‘Come and talk with me awhile, Raine.’

  He glanced back at the path leading east and finally brought his horse closer to hers. His expression was shielded, though she saw a glimpse of emotion behind it. She beckoned for him to come nearer, and when their horses were alongside each other, she took his hand.

  ‘I do not regret what happened between us last night. I remember every moment, and it makes me smile.’ Her heart lay in her words, and she hoped he would feel the same.

  Rainee squeezed her hand, and admitted, ‘I will never forget you, Carice.’

  His words were a physical blow, shattering her hopes. Her eyes welled up with tears, knowing that he really was giving up, and he intended to go through with this. With effort, she managed to speak. ‘Somehow, I wanted to believe that you might change your mind.’

  ‘About what?’ Though his tone was questioning, she heard the wariness in his voice.

  She pointed skyward, towards the sun. ‘About taking me to Tara.’

  The sudden transformation of his expression told her that she’d guessed correctly. His mouth tightened, and his eyes held a bleakness. When he didn’t speak, she continued, ‘We’ve been travelling east all day. And we’ve been going east since we left Laochre. Did you think I wouldn’t notice?’

  A thread of ice ran through her veins, but he made no denial. He looked at her squarely and said quietly, ‘I hoped you wouldn’t.’

  Her heart ached, but she forced herself to continue. ‘You knew those Norman soldiers,’ she said softly. ‘That is why they didn’t attack us. Because they were your men all along, weren’t they?’

  ‘My commander was there,’ he agreed. ‘They’ve been following us.’

  The coldness within her seemed to fill up every empty space. She was trying to keep from crying, but it took every effort to hold back her grief. ‘And that was why you weren’t at all afraid of disobeying orders,’ she guessed. ‘Because you were following their commands the entire time.’

  He took a step forward. ‘Carice, you—’

  ‘I what? I wasn’t supposed to know about what you were really doing?’ She pressed her lips together. ‘I suspected that something was wrong. But when you took care of me whilst I was ill, I wanted to believe differently. I wanted to imagine that you would keep your promises to me. But that was never a possibility, was it?’

  He made no denial. ‘You do not understand my reasons.’

  ‘You’re wrong. I understand quite well. You believe that the king will free your sisters if you obey their orders.’ Her voice softened, and she gripped her hands together, wishing he would break free of the Normans.

  ‘I don’t believe they will let your sisters go,’ she continued, ‘for without that threat, they cannot control you.’ A tear slid down her cheek, and he moved forward to wipe it away. The touch of his hand only brought more tears to her eyes. ‘I suppose I deserve this. For I tried to manipulate you as well. I lay with you last night, hoping you would change your mind about delivering me into their hands.’

  Raine caressed her cheek, and in his eyes, she saw his remorse. ‘You never had to lower yourself in that way.’

  ‘I didn’t believe that was what it was,’ she confessed. ‘For whether or not you believe it, I was falling in love with you. I gave myself to you because you were the only man I ever wanted. And before I die, I wanted a moment to be close to you.’

  He drew her palm to his mouth. ‘You deserve a better man than me, chérie. I should not have stolen your innocence. And I regret that I cannot change what happened.’

  ‘You can change what will happen.’ She remained motionless, praying that he would let her go. ‘Don’t give me over to Rory. Not if you care for me at all.’

  He said nothing, and as time stretched on, her hopes sank. No matter how much she wanted to believe it, he would not put her above his orders. With sadness, she pulled back her hand. ‘What do you plan to do with me now?’

  The stoic look on his face only drove the invisible knife deeper into her heart. And she knew that there was no going back.

  ‘Don’t weep,’ he said. ‘I swear to you, Rory will never touch you.’

  Then why was he bringing her to Tara? From the intensity on his face, it appeared that he was holding something back. Sh
e wanted to ask him his reasons, but the moment she began to speak, he moved in and kissed her hard.

  His mouth moved over hers, reminding her of the hours they had spent in each other’s arms. She surrendered to him, welcoming the affection and wishing to God he would turn away from this course.

  Raine dried her tears, holding her face while he tried to tell her the words he couldn’t speak. ‘Trust in me, Carice. You will not wed him. Not while I am breathing.’

  She didn’t understand, but neither could she let go of her fears. He was indeed involved in something dangerous, and from the haunted look in his eyes, it did concern the High King.

  ‘You could let me go,’ she whispered. ‘Ride away from me, and I’ll return to Casheldrum until I can get another escort. No one would need to know what happened.’

  ‘The Normans will find you. It’s too late for that.’ He took her hand in his and pointed towards the horizon. ‘They are waiting for us, just over the rise of that hill.’

  Her throat closed up with fear, but she tried one last time. ‘And what would you do if I turned my horse and rode back? Would you hunt me down?’

  The dark expression on his face sent a chill through her. ‘Yes. I would.’

  Chapter Nine

  They reached the Norman camp at nightfall. The blaze of several fires lit up the darkness, and armed sentries stood all around. Several soldiers were working on setting up tents while others tended to the horses. Raine rode into the camp with Carice, and as they approached, her posture tightened. She looked back at him, and the sadness in her eyes only made him feel worse. He deserved this.

  But what else could he have done? The men were too close, and even if he had tried to help her leave, the soldiers would have caught them. They would have treated Carice like a prisoner, and she wasn’t strong enough to endure captivity. He, himself, might be sentenced to death for desertion. And it would only endanger his sisters more, if they were still alive.

  The soldiers stood back to let them pass, and when Raine reached the centre of the camp, he saw her father waiting. The man’s expression was a blend of relief and fury.