Winter Falls

by Nicole Maggi

  “To a certain extent,” Jonah said. “But there comes a point where she gives up and that’s usually when—when I—”

  “Self-destruct?” I supplied.

  “Yeah.” Jonah blew a hard breath out. “And I really self-destructed in Fairfield.”

  Part of me wanted him to stop talking, to stay that boy I had seen under the willow tree earlier, pure and beautiful. But he had opened this door, and it was too late to slam it shut now.

  As if he could sense this, Jonah ran his words into each other as he talked. “Most of the parties I went to Bree would go with me to keep an eye on me. But that night she didn’t. I was already buzzed by the time I got there and got drunker as the night wore on. I left after midnight with a girl I was kinda dating.” He glanced at me, but I only nodded so he rushed on. “Emily liked to drink too—that was the only thing we had in common.

  “I don’t even know how I made it out of the driveway,” Jonah continued. “For that matter, I don’t know how I got the key into the ignition. But less than a mile from the house, I lost total control of the car. We went flying off the road. We were going so fast that we crashed through the guardrail and—and—finally—slammed into a tree.”

  “Oh, my God,” I breathed. I pressed my hands to his cheeks and made him look at me. His eyes were haunted and far away. “Were you okay?”

  He laughed, a harsh bark of a laugh that cut me inside. “Oh, I was fine. Hardly a scratch. But Emily . . . she . . .”

  I could barely breathe. “Is she—did she die?”

  “No,” he whispered. “Her legs got pinned under the dashboard. They had to amputate both of them.”

  My stomach bottomed out. I pushed myself off his lap and moved to the edge of the bench. Jonah reached for me, but I held my hand up. “Just give me a minute.”

  He dropped his arms and twisted his hands in his lap. “It was horrible, and I wasn’t sober enough to really know what was going on. The ambulance took her away . . . and then the police took me . . . They put me in the county jail, and my parents came in the middle of the night to get me. I’ll never forget the look on my dad’s face . . .”

  His voice sounded muffled and far away to my ears. How could he have been so stupid, so reckless? He had destroyed someone else’s life because of his own selfishness. I shuddered, not sure I could look at him, but I forced myself to. He was in profile again, his hair wild from the wind. A teardrop poised at the corner of his eyelashes. He was still the same Jonah, the same marble angel. A fallen angel now, maybe, but who wasn’t?

  I had caused destruction too; all those people on the bridge had died because of me. Even though I knew it was really the fault of the Malandanti, they destroyed the bridge to take me—and only me—down.

  “—Dad’s company bailed me out—”

  I snapped back to what he was saying. “Wait. What?”

  “My dad’s company. They kinda swooped in and handled everything. They got the charges against me dropped. I have no idea how but they did. They also made us leave Fairfield—told my dad that if we didn’t they would ruin his career. My parents were so mad at me—still are—because they thought Fairfield was it. Bree was furious.” Jonah leaned forward, elbows digging into his knees. “As if I cared about moving again or any of it . . . I mean, I should be in jail for what I did, and I got off so freaking easy, and Emily . . . she has to deal with this the rest of her life.” He covered his face with his hands.

  My mind was jumpy and fractured as I watched him. The Guild—the Malandanti—had bailed him out. Of course Jonah had no idea how, because I was sure they had used magic, the same mind influence Mr. Wolfe had used to fool everyone about the power plant.

  I sucked in a breath. No wonder Jonah had defended the Guild the other night at dinner. It had nothing to do with the Malandanti or the Waterfall or the power plant. They had saved his life. And Jonah, free from the law, was shackled to this guilt for the rest of his life, the same way the kernel of guilt from the bridge collapse would always live in me. I touched his shoulder. “Do you still drink?”

  He dropped his hands away from his face. His eyes were clear. “No. I haven’t had a drop since that night. I don’t think I ever will again.”

  “Good.”

  He swallowed. “So you—you still want to be with me?”

  Maybe it was strange, but that had never been in question. “Jonah.” I put my other hand on his shoulder and circled my arms around his neck. “I’m not saying what you did wasn’t awful, but we all deserve forgiveness.” I scooted closer to him. “Your family came to Twin Willows for a new start, and that’s what you get.”

  He snaked his arms around my waist and lifted me onto his lap. I rested my head on his shoulder, and he stroked my hair, my neck, my back. He didn’t say anything; he didn’t need to. We stayed like that for a long time before I raised my head. “Was that what the fight was about with your dad?”

  “Yeah.” Jonah leaned back against the bench, bringing me with him. “I guess I deserve to have him throw the accident in my face, but when he goes on and on about how I don’t have ambition or direction or anything—how does he know? All he cares about is his job. He doesn’t pay attention to what we want. I do have a direction, and there are things I want, more than he’ll ever know.”

  My breath hitched in my throat. “Like what?” I whispered.

  He looked at me, his eyes glittering like a thousand emeralds. “Like you,” he murmured and kissed me softly.

  I clung to him, wanting to wipe my brain clean and surrender, but my skin itched with guilt. He had shared his secret with me. It wasn’t fair that I couldn’t share mine with him. A battle raged inside me . . . tell him . . . rule number one . . . and I saw again the blueprint of the power plant. Whatever his dad and sister knew, it was better if Jonah knew nothing, so there was no risk of anything getting back to them.

  Jonah circled his thumbs against my collarbone. “Every day, I think I can’t like you any more than I already do, and then you do something even more amazing.” He shook his head. “I really thought you’d run like hell after I told you about the accident.”

  “For that? Nah.” I traced his lips with my finger. “For making me freeze another night in this graveyard, maybe.”

  He smiled softly. “I adore you. I’ve adored you since that day in the office when you switched my schedule with Bree’s, so we’d have all those classes together.”

  My fingertip paused on his bottom lip. “You knew about that?”

  He bit my finger gently. “Yeah. I thought it was really cute.” He slid his hands from my shoulders down my back. “You are totally not the type of girl I wanted to like. You work in the school office. You’re the kind of girl I can actually introduce to my parents. I wanted to like someone who wears way too much black eyeliner and has piercings in unmentionable places.”

  I laughed.

  “Then I got to know you and realized you’re just as much of a freak as I am. You just wear it on the inside.”

  My heart went cold. “What do you mean?”

  “You get it, like me. You get that there’s more to life than this place, and you aren’t satisfied to be put into a little box.” He ducked his head to kiss me. “You’re an explorer, like me.”

  You have no idea, I thought, but I let him kiss me until my mind was empty. I felt him lose himself in me, and it was a relief to lose myself in him, too . . . and let the world outside the ancient wrought-iron gate disappear.

  The moon was starting to descend by the time Jonah walked me to the street. We stood in the shadow of the gate for one last kiss good night that neither of us wanted to end. Jonah held me close, and I felt a tug in my chest, a pull at my heart so strong I thought my ribs would break open. I buried my face in his neck and clung to him, trying to breathe. As Jonah’s lips moved behind my ear, the pain in my chest quickened and spread, and my whole body felt pricked with needles.

  With a sharp intake of breath, I knew what was happening. I pushed Jonah aw
ay with more force than necessary.

  “What’s wrong?” he asked.

  “Nothing.” I gasped and clutched my coat tight to my throat, as though it could somehow keep the transformation from happening. “I-I should really be going.”

  “I’ll walk you home.”

  “No! I mean”—I forced a smile—“it’s okay. You live just around the corner, and it’s freezing. It’s not like there’s some serial killer lurking the streets of Twin Willows. I’ll be fine.” I gave him a peck and pushed him gently in the direction of his house. “See you tomorrow.”

  I waited until he had faded into the darkness and then took off toward my house, running full tilt. The Call tugged at me; I ran faster but only made it to the top of my driveway before my body gave out under its power.

  Chapter Twenty-one

  The Message

  Even as I soared toward the stars, my mind was pulled down to earth by thoughts of Jonah. Against the black night, my aura flickered. I stuffed Jonah into a box and shoved it back to the corner of my mind. I was a Benandante right now, and my other life couldn’t cross into this one . . .

  The moon was hidden behind a bank of clouds, shrouding the world below in darkness. I opened my mind, searching for Heath’s thoughts. What’s going on?

  Clan meeting. At the birch trees.

  Are we going in again?

  How should I know? I’m not the one in charge.

  Why was he in such a pissy mood? I was the one who had my date cut short.

  As I neared the birch trees, I heard the thoughts of the other Benandanti. I landed on a branch next to the Eagle. On the ground below the rest of the Clan gathered, our auras overlapping in the small copse.

  The Stag looked around at each of us. I’m sorry, but I have to start this meeting off with bad news. We’ve lost control of the Redwood site.

  Shock and grief flooded into my mind from the others. I turned to the Eagle. Redwood—as in California?

  Yes. She blinked, her golden eyes bright in the darkness. Briefly I wondered if her eyes were the same unusual color in her human form, just as mine and Heath’s were. We’ve controlled that site for decades.

  What’s the magic there?

  The power to heal, even fatal wounds. Including wounds done to your human form while you are transformed and vice versa. She tucked her wings in close to her side. It means the Malandanti are virtually indestructible now.

  I turned back to the rest of the Clan. So there’s only one site left under the control of the Benandanti? I felt cold inside.

  Yes. The Stag paced in a circle around the birch trees. We have no time to lose. We have to act before they break ground on the power plant. That’s why I called us all here tonight.

  Are we going in? The Lynx stood up, his ears pricked forward.

  The Stag shook his head. Tonight we’re going to come up with a strategy—

  —which thanks to the Falcon should be a lot easier, Heath interjected.

  Well, yes. The Stag paused beneath my branch. While the Falcon acted rashly by attacking the Panther, she discovered some vital information. So . . . good work.

  Thanks. I ruffled my feathers, but there wasn’t time to feel proud. Not with everything else that was going on. How soon will we attack?

  I have to take our plan to the Concilio Celeste first, answered the Stag.

  Everyone protested at the same time, a mess of thoughts in my brain.

  The Stag stamped his hoof. Look, I screwed up last time, and I’m not going to let that happen again. We have only one shot at this, and I want all our bases covered before we go in. So the Concilio Celeste will have the final word.

  The Eagle and the Lynx continued to grumble a bit as we devised a plan of attack.

  At the end of the meeting after we had a strategy, the Stag looked each of us in the eyes. I need everyone on board with this. Okay?

  One by one, we agreed.

  The Eagle flew toward the Waterfall to patrol. I wheeled toward the farm, my head buzzing with plans and battle tactics. And in the back of my mind was still the jumble of puzzle pieces about Bree, not to mention the bomb Jonah had dropped in the graveyard. I was so distracted that I almost missed the ball of silvery light in the corner of my eye.

  I turned lightning fast, my body tilting. The Malandanti Raven disappeared into the trees, its aura visible amongst the bare branches. I looked down and realized I was above our pasture, the hillside empty and quiet with the goats shut away in the barn for the night. What was the Raven doing near my home?

  I followed it into the forest, opening a channel in my mind, direct to Heath. I just spotted the Raven coming from the farm.

  That can’t be good. Heath’s glowing white form appeared below me.

  I didn’t think there was any chance the Raven wouldn’t see us, but I floated above the treetops, keeping an eye on the telltale shimmer of the Malandante’s aura.

  The aura went out.

  What the—how did it do that? I snapped to Heath.

  That’s advanced magic—

  The Raven collided with me, knocking me out of the air. Night enveloped its black feathers so completely that I couldn’t see it. I free-fell for several feet before pulling myself up, then glided low to the ground.

  Are you all right? Heath asked.

  I think so.

  Dead leaves crunched, and the Boar slammed through the brush, flattening bushes and small trees under its weight.

  Heath stumbled backward. I circled in the air, and the invisible Raven bashed into me, slicing a talon across my back. White-hot pain seared my flesh.

  Down below, the Coyote joined the Boar and danced around Heath, jaws snapping.

  Get out of there, I told him.

  You think? Heath shot back.

  The Coyote lunged for him, creating a narrow space through which Heath streaked, his aura like a fiery tail behind him.

  I scanned the ground. The Coyote and the Boar ran in the opposite direction, toward the Waterfall. The Raven had disappeared again. Why aren’t they following?

  I don’t know. Heath jumped over a boulder. I don’t like it. Let’s separate and meet at the barn. He headed east, away from the farm.

  I detoured in the direction of town, then turned back toward home. As I swooped low over the road, I suddenly remembered my body was not in my bed. It was at the top of the driveway where I had collapsed after leaving Jonah.

  The darkness was broken by a set of headlights from a car parked where the driveway met the road. The driver’s side door was open, and the lights pooled on the ground, revealing a figure bending over my lifeless form.

  It was Jenny.

  Heath’s words flashed in my mind: If anyone turns your body while you’re transformed, your soul cannot return. And the locket that was supposed to protect me . . . sat with its broken clasp on my nightstand.

  I plunged toward Jenny. As I came closer I heard her calling my name. She grasped my human body by the shoulder and heaved.

  I screeched, the sound ripping across the still night.

  Jenny fell back and looked up. The headlights illuminated the fear on her face.

  I rushed her, flapping my wings, and she threw her arms up in front of her face. In that instant, I dissolved into my body and rolled over, gasping for air.

  “Lessi!” Jenny crawled to me. “Are you okay?”

  I sat up and took her by the wrist, trying to slow my breathing. My whole body trembled. “Yeah, I think so. What happened?”

  “I found you lying here.” Her eyes were wide and glinted with tears. “Oh, my God, I couldn’t find a pulse. I thought you were—”

  I reached out and hugged her. “I’m all right. I tripped on something. I must have blacked out for a few minutes.”

  “And then there was this huge bird—did you see it?” She scanned the sky for the falcon I knew she wouldn’t see.

  “I think I heard it. Did it screech or something?”

  “It made a horrible noise, like a scream. I
t must have flown away.” She took a deep breath and squeezed my hand. “That was really, really freaky. But I’m so glad you’re okay.”

  “I’m fine,” I assured her. The pressure of her hand in mine helped slow my body’s shaking. “But, um, what are you doing here? It’s, like, three in the morning or something, isn’t it?”

  “I was out with Seth. Missed my curfew.” She grinned, her eyes sparkling. “Oops.”

  I forced a laugh, my nerves still on edge at almost being caught. Not just caught, I realized. Killed. It wasn’t just the Malandanti who could kill me; a simple loving gesture could also end my life forever. If Jenny had turned me over . . . I drew a shaky breath and tried to focus on what she was saying. “What?”

  Jenny jiggled my arm. “I said, we’re going to the bonfire party together tomorrow.”

  “Oh. I take it you talked to Carly?”

  “Yeah, she’s fine with it.” She punched me lightly. “If you’d been at lunch with us yesterday, you would have known that.”

  “Sorry. But Jonah and I are definitely coming tomorrow, and we’ll have some girl time, I promise.”

  “Good.” Jenny looked over my shoulder. Her grip on my arm tightened. “What is that?”

  I turned. An unearthly red glow shone from behind the house, flickering against the darkness. Pulling Jenny with me, I ran down the driveway. When we rounded the side of the house, I slid to a stop, gravel sputtering under my feet.

  The barn was on fire.

  Flames poured off the roof and licked at the walls. Wind gusted, stretching the fire down around the barn door. Black smoke billowed high into the air, blocking out the stars.

  I let out a cry and whirled in a little circle, trying to organize coherent thoughts. “Call—,” I said.

  But Jenny was already punching numbers on her cell phone.

  I heard the other line click and answer, “This is 911. What’s your emergency?”

  “There’s a fire at my friend’s farm,” Jenny said. Her voice teetered on the edge of breaking. “At 826 Route Seventeen . . . No, the barn.” She covered the receiver with her hand and said to me, “It’s unoccupied, right?”