Sacrifice

by Alexandrea Weis

“He only took three days to rise from the dead. You’ve taken three Goddamn years! Where in the hell have you been? Do you know what I have been through? Do you know what losing you did to me? I thought I meant something to you. You conceited piece of shit! How could you do that to me?” I punched him as hard as I could in the arm.

  A look of disbelief overtook his features as he stepped back from me. “Stop hitting me! What the hell is the matter with you?” He rubbed his hand over his left jaw. “Fifteen reconstructive surgeries on my jaw and face, and you hit me right where it hurts,” he bellowed.

  “You’d better start explaining, David. Where in the hell have you been for the past three years?” I screamed.

  “Nicci, would you calm down! Ever since your ex-fiancé shot me and left me for dead on the side of the road, I have been trying to get back to you. There are a lot of reasons why I’ve had to stay away. None of which I can go into right now.”

  Suddenly, I became acutely aware of who was standing before me. “This can’t be happening,” I whispered.

  David stepped toward me. “Would slapping my other cheek convince you that I’m real?”

  “But you can’t be real.” I felt my lower lip begin to quiver. “Everyone said you were dead. I identified your body in the morgue. I buried you. I…” My knees suddenly gave way as I gasped for breath after breath. “David died. You’re not David…Can’t be David…” I kept mumbling as my body sank to the cold cement beneath my feet.

  Then there was a rush of warmth around me as arms pulled me close and the familiar scent of someone, once thought gone from my life, filled my senses. I struggled to look up and fought to clear my vision through the cascade of tears.

  “Nicci, I’m David. I’m here,” his deep voice murmured into my cheek.

  As the fog before my eyes cleared, David came into focus. He was pale and thin but alive, and kneeling beside me. When the light from a nearby street lamp revealed his face, it was then that I got a good look at the damage Michael’s bullet had done.

  His features looked normal but the proportions were slightly off. His right jaw looked larger and more squared in shape than the left. His left jaw still appeared puffy and the cheekbone on the left side of his face was a little more sunken than its counterpart on the right. The left temple had a slight depression between the jaw and hairline, right above his scar. I reached up and ran my fingers gently along his left temple. His eyes never wavered from mine and when my fingers reached his cheek, he covered my hand with his and smiled. I carefully ran my hand over his face and down his neck feeling the warmth of his flesh beneath my fingertips. Then I saw the tracheotomy scar at the base of his throat.

  “My God, what did he do to you?” I whispered to him as I lowered my head and fought back my tears.

  David reached under my chin and tilted my face to his. “It’s not so bad. I can talk, walk, eat, and best of all I’m here with you,” he said in his Irish tinged accent.

  “What happened David? Where have you been? Why didn’t you contact me? I could have helped you. I could have been there for you.”

  David sighed. “There are a lot of things I have to tell you.” He reached for my hand and pulled me up from the ground. He looked back down the empty street and then eased me into a nearby darkened doorway. “Look, I don’t have much time,” he whispered anxiously.

  “When they told me you were dead, I kept thinking it was some kind of mistake. But I thought that was you in the morgue, and if that wasn’t you, who was it?”

  “I’m not sure. There are a lot of pieces to this puzzle that I’m still trying to put together.” He paused and ran his hand through his wavy, brown hair. “I know it’s been a long time and these past three years must have been hell for you, just like they have been for me, but I want you to know that I never stopped thinking of you.”

  “David, I need to know where you have been. Please tell me.”

  He gazed back at me, frowning. “I can’t, not now. Trying to explain where I have been for the past three years could take quite a while, and you need to get back. Dallas is a very suspicious man. If you don’t get back to Val’s place soon, he will send out the entire New Orleans Police Department to search for you.”

  Dallas. The name on David’s lips made my insides curdle.

  “You know about Dallas?” I softly asked.

  David said nothing and simply nodded.

  “And how did you know I was at Val’s?”

  He placed his hands about my face. “I have been keeping watch over you for quite a while.” He leaned over and tenderly kissed my forehead.

  The touch of his lips against my skin sent a shudder through me. I closed my eyes and silently cursed him. Three years gone, and in less than five minutes, he had my body reacting to his slightest touch. But I used the anger still churning inside of me to steady myself against him. I could not let him back into my good graces so easily. He had stayed away. He had watched me start a new relationship with another man, and he had done nothing. I thought I had once known everything there was to know about David Alexander, but in that moment I realized I was wrong. What kind of man could stand by and let the woman he loved go off with another? Doubt began to gnaw at my feelings and I could not help but wonder if the love we had once shared had been genuine. I looked up into David’s eyes and for the first time, I saw an unfamiliar glint of coldness there. Something I had never seen before.

  I took a step back from him. “You have a lot of explaining to do, David.”

  He grimaced. “Before you forgive me?”

  I raised my head. “Before I could ever consider trusting you again.”

  “Trust me? I’m glad to see you haven’t changed.” He shook his head and gave a frustrated sigh. “Nicci, I didn’t choose to leave you. If Michael hadn’t come along things would have turned out a whole lot better for us. And I hope one day you will understand why I have had to stay away. But I want you to know that I didn’t come back to explain my whereabouts to you. I came back for you. And once we have aired our grievances about the past, then I will expect us to pick up where we left off.”

  My jaw dropped. “You arrogant, condescending, chauvinistic, asshole! I can’t believe you just said that to me. After all the hell you have put me through. You’ve betrayed me, David, twice! You lied to me and then ran away to New York. Now you come back from—”

  “Are you finished?” he asked, cutting me off.

  “Do you think I could just forgive you for everything and what…hop in bed with you?”

  “Yes,” he said firmly. David grinned as his gray eyes inspected my black gown. “I remember the last time I saw you in that dress. It was the night of Val’s engagement party for you and Michael. I returned to you that night after my hasty departure to New York. You forgave me then. I can’t believe you won’t try and forgive me now.”

  I stood there fuming. I wanted to reach out and blot out the smug grin from his face. I felt my resolve harden against him. I folded my arms over my chest and stared at him.

  “Don’t you think for one moment that I will ever be the same woman you once—”

  He moved closer to me, silencing my tirade. “Nicci, stop trying to push me away. We both know that nothing has changed between us.”

  I shook my head and looked away. “But things have changed, David. I can’t just pick up with you again without any consideration to…I have others to consider.”

  “Are we talking about Dallas?”

  I turned back to him and nodded.

  He opened his mouth to speak but hesitated for a moment. “Do you love him?” he eventually asked.

  I caught sight of David’s eyes and felt the weight of my emotions bear down on my heart.

  “Dallas wants to marry me. We’ve made plans for our future together.”

  “Plans aren’t love, Nicci. All the plans in the world won’t make up for the emptiness inside of your heart. The question is which one of us fills that emptiness? Me or Dallas?” He paused and I felt the se
conds tick by as he carefully studied my features. “Meet me tomorrow morning at the Corner Café on Royal. You remember the place,” he asserted.

  I nodded. “Where we went for coffee. Yes, I remember.”

  “Come tomorrow at nine. I will answer all of your questions then.” He looked nervously out into the street. “You need to go.” He took my hand and led me from the doorway.

  We stepped onto the sidewalk and were immediately greeted by a rush of cool night air. I could hear the echoes of people laughing and somewhere in the distance Jazz music was being played.

  “Go home, Nicci,” he ordered as he let go of my hand.

  “Wait a minute!” I exclaimed, raising my voice. “That’s it. You show yourself to me and expect me to go back home like nothing’s happened. We need to talk and—”

  “Tomorrow, we will talk,” David interjected. “But you must go now, Nicci. Go back to Dallas and say nothing of tonight.”

  “Trust me that me that won’t be a problem. He already thinks…never mind.” I took a step away and looked back at David. “I will see you tomorrow at nine. Right?” I asked, suddenly feeling anxious about leaving him.

  He nodded. “I will see you then. Now go home before Dallas comes looking for you. I don’t need another jealous fiancé wanting to kill me.” He grinned. “Dallas, unlike Michael, never misses.”

  ***

  Half an hour later, I was standing next to the sink in the dark of Val’s oversized gourmet kitchen, nursing a vodka and orange juice in my trembling hands. I lifted my drink to my lips and took a long sip. The vodka burned as it eased its way down my throat. My body felt bruised and battered. I had hoped the alcohol would help to calm my frazzled nerves before I had to confront Dallas, but the drink in my hand was doing little to help ease my shaking. I was considering mixing another when the lights flashed on around me. I turned to find Dallas standing in the kitchen doorway.

  “Aren’t you coming to bed?” Dallas inquired.

  He was naked from the waist up and dressed in a pair of blue cotton pajama bottoms. His long arms were crossed over his muscular chest as he leaned against the doorway.

  I gave him a reassuring smile. “I just needed a drink.”

  Dallas eyed me skeptically. “Why?” He came into the room and walked over to my side. “It couldn’t have been that bad dealing with Caston? Did Simon say something to you after you two left the party?”

  I stared up into his dark blue eyes and felt a pang of guilt race through me. I nodded slightly. “He suggested I sleep with Caston to get him to talk. He even told me I would enjoy it. That’s why I decided to walk home from the party. I couldn’t stomach getting into a car with Simon.” I put my drink down on the counter next to me.

  “I told you I didn’t think your involvement with Simon was a good idea. He’s a ruthless bastard who loves to push people. I wish for once you would listen to me, Nicci. I don’t think you should continue with this assignment anymore.” He placed his arms about me and tenderly kissed my cheek.

  I pulled away from him. “You don’t think I can do this?”

  Dallas pulled my body back to his. “No, quite the opposite. I was watching you with Caston tonight. The way you manipulated him. I liked it. Seeing you wearing that dress and working with Simon did something to me.” He leaned over and grazed his teeth along the nape of my neck. “But I don’t want you getting in too deep,” he said against my flesh.

  “I can handle myself.”

  He kissed my neck. “I don’t like it when you’re upset, Nicci. I only want to see you happy.”

  I laughed. “Happy? What an elusive word. I never realized until now how unattainable happiness can be.”

  Dallas nuzzled my cheek. “What are you talking about? We’re happy, aren’t we?”

  I pulled away once more and looked into his face. Suddenly afraid to say what I was thinking, I cast my eyes to the floor. I recalled something David had once said to me. “Happiness changes with the setting of the sun. It’s an achievement to strive for but it can never be maintained. It all depends on the moment…and the person,” I finally answered.

  He placed his hand beneath my chin and lifted my face to meet his. “That sounds like something from one of your books. Happiness is a constant, Nicci. Sometimes it comes easily; sometimes you have to work for it. But as long as you are willing to embrace it, happiness will find you. Just as it has found us.”

  His hand traveled down from my chin to my neck and along my right shoulder. His long fingers followed the curve of my black dress until they came to rest over my right breast. He cupped my breast and pressed his hips into mine.

  “Somehow I get the impression you’re confusing happiness with passion,” I mumbled.

  Dallas grinned. “Am I?”

  He leaned over and hungrily kissed my lips. At first I was uncertain how to react to his ardor but then something inside of me gave way. Not that my thoughts had ventured far from David, but there was still something about Dallas that tugged at my heart. I wanted desperately to recapture what we had shared over the past few months. As I reached up and felt the thick muscles in his chest, his arms tightened around me.

  He caressed my cheek with tender kisses until he reached my earlobe. “Come to bed, Nicci,” he begged in his husky voice.

  “Yes, Dallas,” I whispered.

  He took my hand and led me out the kitchen, stopping only once along the way to turn out the lights. As we headed down the hallway to the back stairs, he teased the flesh on my neck with kisses. When we made our way into the darkness of our bedroom, my mind began to fill with doubt. David was alive, and here I was about to give myself to another man. But this was Dallas, I reasoned, a person who had been there for me through the worst of times. He had protected me and he loved me. And as his hands eased the heavy material of my gown from around my body, I felt my reluctance fade. All I wanted was to revel in the pleasure of his touch. To no longer think or worry about what was yet to come and still my world-weary mind until the revealing light of dawn chased away the comforting darkness.

  Chapter Ten

  The next morning, I was sitting at the kitchen breakfast table by the large picture window looking out over the courtyard. As I sipped from my mug of coffee, made on Val’s fancy imported coffee machine, my eyes kept wandering from the clock on the stainless steel microwave to the scenery outside of the window.

  “Where are you off to so early?” Dallas asked when he entered the kitchen. He motioned to the casual slacks and button down dress shirt I had on. “You look nice,” he added.

  I tried to nonchalantly stroke my hand through my fastidiously coiffed hair and hide my meticulously made up face from his piecing gaze. “Just going to run some errands,” I lied.

  “Where to the country club? You’re made up like you’re going on a photo shoot.” He walked over to the table and sat down across from me. His dark blue eyes examined my face. “What is it, Nicci?” he questioned in a firm voice.

  I could feel the blush rising on my cheeks. “I’m just in a pretty good mood after last night. I guess I got a little carried away this morning.”

  Dallas scowled as he leaned in closer to me. “After last night? I was there, Nicci, and I got the distinct impression, when I was making love to you, that your head was somewhere else.”

  I stood from the table, frowning at him. “You make it sound like I was just lying there and moaning on cue.”

  He raised his dark brows. “Were you?”

  I shook my head and walked to the kitchen door. “Why are you always grilling me for ulterior motives?”

  “Maybe it’s the ulterior motives I’m worried about. Nothing is black and white with you. Every time you smile at me, laugh with me, or just look off into the distance, I can’t help but wonder what you’re thinking about,” he called out behind me.

  I stopped at the doorway but did not turn around to confront him. “Or more to the point, you’re wondering who I’m thinking about. Is that it, Dallas?”
<
br />   He said nothing. The silence in the room filled the void growing between us.

  “Just be back in hour. We have a lot of ground to cover before your next meeting with Caston,” he instructed.

  I made my way out of the kitchen door. “I’ll call you if I’m going to be longer,” I said over my shoulder.

  I could almost hear him smirking behind me. “Make sure your cell phone is on this time, Nicci. Don’t make me come looking for you.”

  ***

  The Corner Café was located on the St. Anne and Royal Streets in the heart of the French Quarter. As I approached the little coffee shop, I felt my feet moving faster toward the entrance. Before I opened the old metal door to the establishment, I checked my reflection in the front window. The make-up I had so carefully applied looked thick and pasty on my creamy skin. My long auburn hair seemed too styled and negated the casual appearance I was so desperately trying to portray. I quickly reached up and rubbed my hands along my cheeks, wiping away the excess powder from my face. I tamed my auburn hair back behind my ears in an attempt to calm the curls I had styled into it earlier that morning. With a final nod of approval at my reflection, I opened the heavy metal door and stepped inside.

  The coffee shop was filled with a small number of customers and waitresses dressed in bright blue aprons. Less than half of the well-worn, dark wooden tables were filled.

  I nervously scanned the room to see clients sipping coffee or munching on the variety of pastries the place had to offer, but I saw no sign of David.

  “Glad to see you beat me here,” a deep voice said behind me.

  I jumped and turned to find David standing behind me. When I saw his face in the light of day, the damage seemed even more pronounced than the night before. The scar appeared deeper and longer. His jaw line seemed even more disproportionate in the bright light and I noticed a sprinkling of gray in his brown hair. He looked older and leaner than the David I once knew, but his eyes still held their fiery glow.

  He eagerly explored my figure for quite a few seconds. “God, you look good, Nicci.”