Live-In Position

by V. S. Tice

  The blankets and mattresses were all pulled out and gathered in the middle of Victoria’s large room. I curled up on a beanbag chair next to Victoria and Laura, at their request. I fell asleep somewhere in the middle of the second movie. When I woke up, I was covered with a fluffy pink blanket and everything had been turned off. I wondered if one of the girls had taken care of everything.

  I pulled the feather boa off of my neck and put the strand of pearls on Victoria’s dresser before I walked around quietly picking up the garbage and the bowls. Once they were all collected, I went to the kitchen. On the way, I groaned at the mess I would be cleaning up tomorrow, but was also a little surprised it wasn’t worse. Sixteen girls can do a lot of damage.

  While rinsing out the popcorn bowls, I heard a noise behind me and jumped. Dropping the sponge on the floor, I clenched my chest and attempted to catch my breath. Dr. Bishop stood in the center of the kitchen looking around at the mess.

  “Sorry,” his said in his normal glacial tone.

  “It’s okay. I didn’t, uh…I thought you were on a trip,” I said in a low tone and picked up the sponge.

  “Obviously,” his tone was clipped and his eyes intense.

  Avoiding his stare, I went back to rinsing out the bowls. After putting them in the dishwasher, I took a deep breath and turned back around. He’d moved closer.

  “Is there a particular reason this place is a disaster and there are twenty girls in my home?” He crossed his arms over his chest.

  The way his voice echoed off the marble tiled floors and countertops, I wanted to make the sign of the cross over my body.

  “It’s just a party for Victoria, for her birthday. I wanted to –”

  “You didn’t feel the need to run this by me before you did it?” Venom laced every word.

  “I apologize. I didn’t realize you would have a problem with it.” I paused and swallowed my anger. “I simply wanted to give her a party with her friends.”

  “Her party is tomorrow, with my family,” he snapped.

  Hold it together. Hold it together.

  But I couldn’t hold my tongue without biting it entirely off and swallowing. And frankly, I like my tongue where it is so I unleashed.

  “A party with children her own age is quite different from an adult tea party. I’m sure she enjoys her time with your family, but every kid should have a party with children their own age. I’ll clean up the mess tomorrow, and you will never know it happened.” Pushing away from the sink, I left the stoic Dr. Bishop in the kitchen.

  I stripped out of my dress and hung it back up before jumping in the shower. After drying and dressing for bed, I sat waiting for him to show up and fire me. But just as before, he never came.

  The next morning a stream of nannies arrived to pick up Victoria’s friends. After the last guest had departed, I got Victoria dressed for her tea party.

  Mrs. Ilene Bishop, Dr. Bishop’s mother, arrived around ten in the morning to retrieve Victoria and take her to her house. It was technically my day to be off, but I cleaned up the birthday mess instead.

  Weeks passed without any further confrontation with Dr. Bishop.

  The day of the first snow came mid-November. Deciding Victoria’s homework could wait for a little bit, I quickly bundled us up in coats and boots. Pulling her into the backyard by her hand, we stopped in the center of the yard. It looked like a winter wonderland. I leaned down and made a small snowball. I threw it and hit her in the arm. Her shocked expression made me erupt into a full belly laugh.

  “Hey,” she yelled. “What was that for?”

  “Hmmm…just because I felt like it.” With a small shrug, I stuck my tongue out and made another snowball.

  She took off running. “No, don’t hit me again!” She giggled.

  “You can run, but you can’t hide,” I shouted and chased after her with the icy lump in my hand.

  She dodged behind a thick oak tree. I quickly rounded it to get her, but she surprised me with her own frozen mush ball. She hit me right on the side of my face. A sharp intake of breath passed her lips. Her widened eyes studied my reaction.

  I laughed loudly and smashed my snowball onto the top of her head.

  “Ahh…that’s cold!” she screeched and took off running.

  We finished our snow fight and decided to make a snowman before we went back inside. Victoria wanted to stay out longer, but her chattering teeth and the homework that was still waiting for her made the decision for us.

  SOON IT WAS the week of Thanksgiving. Larissa was coming to pick Victoria up for the holiday. I had Thanksgiving and the day after off so I decided to visit my dad. The trip to Tacoma was longer than normal because of holiday traffic, but I still made decent time. When I pulled up to the house, there was an unfamiliar car in the driveway. Grabbing my bag out of the back of my jeep, I headed to the front door and went in.

  “Happy Thanksgiving,” I shouted.

  “Sophia!” My father came around from the living room and pulled me into a large hug. The warmth of my father was a welcome change to my interactions with the snow miser I worked for.

  “I’m so glad you could make it.”

  “I’m happy I got to come home too.” I kissed his cheek. “I’m just going to throw my bag into my old room, okay?” I started for the stairs.

  “Um…Sophia?” Carla stood next to my father. He was holding her hand with a look of trepidation on his face.

  “Yeah?” I stopped at the bottom step.

  “Umm…just throw your stuff up there and then we’ll talk.” He waved me on nervously.

  My eyes flashed to Carla’s face. She seemed a little upset. I quickly threw my bag on my old bed and went back downstairs.

  “So...?” I stood behind the couch leaning on the back of it. My father looked up at me, still obviously nervous. “What’d you want to talk about?”

  “Sophia, I, uh…” He rubbed his face and then took a deep breath. “Carla is living with me now. I asked her a couple of months back, and she just moved in a few weeks ago. I was going to tell –”

  “That’s great, Dad.” I smiled and walked over, wrapping him up in a hug. “I’m so happy for you.”

  “Really?” The nervous lines melted from his face.

  “Absolutely!” Pulling him tighter into a hug, I patted his back.

  Carla entered the room with a tray of snacks and drinks. Once she set the tray down, I walked over and hugged her too. Moving back, I asked her, “So, think you can get him to marry you too?” I winked and she blushed.

  “Rick, I told you she wouldn’t be mad at you.”

  Thanksgiving dinner brought about a house full of guests. Carla’s nieces and nephews, sister and brother-in-law, and an older woman everyone considered a grandmother, all gathered at my father’s house for dinner. It was a great time listening to Carla’s brother-in-law and my father’s old high school buddy tell stories about when he was a young man in Tacoma. It had been a long time since my father’s house had felt so full and warm.

  For a quick moment, my mind wandered to my mother and our last Thanksgiving with her. It had only been the three of us. We’d eaten around her bed in the living room. She didn’t eat much, but she had smiled most of that day.

  “Soph?” My father’s voice pulled me from my memories.

  “Yeah?” I gave him a small smile.

  He wrapped one arm around my shoulders. “I miss her too.” I allowed one tear to escape but refused to be sad today. Mother would never have wanted that.

  “Am I that obvious?” While wiping away the lone tear, he squeezed me tighter.

  “I just know how to read that face of yours.” He kissed the side of my head. “You are so much like your mother.”

  I placed a quick kiss on his cheek.

  It was ridiculously early the next morning when my cell phone pulled me from some much-needed rest. Thanksgiving had gone on into the late hours of the night, and I had dreamt of my mother.

  “Hello?” I croaked.
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  “Sophia, it’s Amber, I’m so sorry to call you, but Larissa went into labor this morning and we are all at the hospital. Mrs. Bedford asked me to call you and ask if you could come back earlier today.” I groaned. “I’m so sorry Sophia.”

  “No, no, it’s fine. I’ll leave soon. Give me about two hours, okay? I’ll call you if I’m running behind.”

  Victoria came skipping down the hospital hallway and jumped into my arms once I finally made it back to Seattle.

  “Sophia!”

  “Hey you!” I squeezed her. “I hear you are getting another cousin.”

  She nodded excitedly. A tug on my jeans and I looked down into the sweet baby face of Ryan. He had Larissa’s blonde hair and Max’s hazel eyes.

  “Hey there, little man.” I ruffled his curly blonde locks.

  “Up too.” He held out his arms out to me.

  Moving Victoria to my left hip, I scooped Ryan up onto my right. Both of them yawned at the same time.

  “Hey, Sophia, you got your hands full.” Amber appeared out of a room with exhaustion evident around her eyes.

  “Just a little,” I smiled. “I’m gonna take Victoria back to the house so she can take a nap. You want me to take Ryan?”

  “Oh, you don’t have to do that. I’m going to take him home right after the baby gets here. Larissa and Max want him here.” She ran her hand through his hair. “Though it seems his nap has already started.”

  I tilted my head and saw that Ryan was fast asleep. I bit my lip so I didn’t laugh and wake him.

  “Here, I’ll take him.”

  As Amber stepped forward, the all too familiar sensation of Dr. Bishop’s presence filled the hallway. Amber took Ryan into her arms and held him against her chest. He never woke.

  “Okay, well, keep me posted, and if you need anything give me a call, okay?” I whispered. With a smile on her lips, she nodded slightly, not wanting to wake Ryan.

  Dr. Bishop stood at the nurse’s station in his scrubs and white coat. I turned to leave, but his eyes on me stopped my progress toward the exit. They were like liquid fire, piercing my flesh causing tingling flames to course through my veins.

  “I’m just going to take her back to the house.” The words left my mouth breathier than intended.

  What the heck is going on?

  He nodded without a word, and I practically ran down the hall, well as fast as I could with a little girl in my arms.

  After the Thanksgiving holiday things got back to normal with the exception of Victoria’s afternoon lessons. Her horseback riding with Claire was over until March, and since Roberto went back to Spain to visit family until the New Year, she didn’t have her Spanish lessons either.

  Given the free time and the proximity of Christmas, I decided to make Christmas cookies. I had purchased all the ingredients the week before and bought some Christmas shaped cookie cutters. Pulling everything out, I called Victoria down from her room.

  She bounced into the kitchen and looked around the table where I had everything laid out. “What’s all of this?” She hurried to my side.

  “We’re making cookies,” I said, placing the large bowl and measuring cups in front of her.

  “I get to help?” She peeked into the empty bowl.

  “Well, I can’t do it all by myself.” I playfully rolled my eyes at her.

  Setting the cookbook on a stand, Victoria read the instructions to me. Then I had her measure out the amounts needed for each ingredient. When she got to dump them into the bowl we made different dumping noises. Mrs. Baker sat at the table with us when we began to cut out the cookies. She became our official cookie dough roller while Victoria was the official cookie cutter and decorator. I placed them on the cookie sheets and kept an eye on them while they baked.

  Covered in flour and sugar, cookie dough under our fingernails, we were laughing at each other’s appearance. In the midst of our happy moment, the snow miser made a rare appearance. He stepped into the room, and our giggles died to whispered snorts. I watched him take in the large mess on and around the table.

  “What’s this?” he asked in his chilled tone.

  “We’re making Christmas cookies!” Victoria said cheerfully. Her tongue stuck out over her lip as she pressed the tree cutter into the dough Mrs. Baker had rolled out to the perfect thickness.

  “Oh, Collin, my boy, you should see her. She’s quite the little cookie cutter professional,” Mrs. Baker chuckled and watched Victoria.

  “Yes,” he said coolly and walked around the table. Standing only two feet away from me, he focused his glacier eyes onto me. “What about her Spanish lesson? Or have you taken it upon yourself to change that as well?”

  My mouth gaped open for a moment. Then, I closed it and straightened myself up.

  “Roberto is in Spain until the New Year. He cancelled the lessons until his return. I put the note about the change into the mail slot on your office door.” My tone bordered on angry. I needed to calm myself. Right at that moment, the oven timer alerted me the cookies were done.

  Saved by the bell!

  “What educational value does making cookies hold?” he quipped.

  Taking the cookies out of the oven, I slid the hot cookie tray onto the top of the stove a little roughly. Taking a deep breath I faced him.

  “Fractions.” I narrowed my eyes.

  “Fractions?” I swear he almost rolled his eyes.

  “Yes, fractions and measurements.” I crossed my arms over my chest. “Plus she’s practicing reading when she reads from the recipe book.” I raised a brow at him actually hoping he would continue to battle this one out with me.

  Both Victoria and Mrs. Baker had grown very quiet and still, their eyes flicking back and forth between Dr. Bishop and myself as we engaged in our standoff. For one moment, he seemed flustered, but he pulled himself together and grumbled as he walked out of the kitchen. I sighed in frustration and went back to Victoria and Mrs. Baker.

  “You alright, dear?” Mrs. Baker lightly rubbed my arm.

  “Yes,” I breathed out. “I just don’t get why he is so…Argh!”

  After taking a deep breath I looked to Victoria. “Hey, why don’t you go upstairs and get washed up. I’ll clean up the mess down here, okay?”

  She nodded and ran off.

  Sitting down, I faced Mrs. Baker. “Please help me understand him before I douse him in Holy Water.”

  She burst into laughter. “Dear, I wish I could help you, but I’m afraid I don’t completely understand him myself. Just know he wasn’t always this way. It has a lot to do with Victoria’s mother,” she sighed and patted my hand. “She left him. Just up and left him and Victoria. Now, I don’t know the whole story, I just know it crushed him.”

  “But why take that out on Victoria?” I begged to understand.

  “Honey, when you look at Victoria, do you see Collin?” She raised an eyebrow at me.

  “I-I don’t know…what are you saying?”

  She pressed her lips together tightly before speaking. “She looks just like her mother. When he sees her, he sees the woman that walked away from them.”

  “That’s not Victoria’s fault. She’s his daughter. He doesn’t have to be so detached and calculating with her.”

  “You and I know that, but he can’t seem to be any other way.” She scooted her chair back and stood. “Come with me.”

  Mrs. Baker led me to a closet in the dining room. She took out a key and unlocked the door. What I thought was a china closet was more like a mortuary or shrine of clothing. Women’s clothing hung on racks. Shoeboxes were stacked beneath them. Beneath the shoeboxes were trunks stacked upon each other.

  “This is supposed to be for holding dinnerware and silver, but instead this is where he keeps all of her things.” Mrs. Baker reached into a drawer and pulled out a picture, holding it out for me to see.

  The picture contained a smiling Dr. Bishop. He looked much younger. In his arms was a slender, beautiful woman. Victoria was her clone. Every
thing from the red curly hair, round face, and the fair porcelain skin was her mother’s.

  “That’s Grace, Victoria’s mother.” I nodded in understanding. “They fell in love when he was in medical school. Victoria was definitely a surprise to both of them, but they decided to keep her. They were going to marry around Victoria’s second birthday, but Grace left. She just disappeared one day. I don’t know what happened, but he was very different after that.”

  I handed her back the picture. We headed back to the kitchen and started cleaning up the cookies.

  “Why does he keep all of her things? Shouldn’t he give some things to Victoria and get rid of the rest, or does he think she is coming back?”

  Mrs. Baker sighed. “Honestly, I think he hopes she will come back to him.”

  We finished cleaning in silence, but my mind whirled with new information.

  Dr. Bishop holding onto a woman, his past, seems so out of character for the man I know. To live longing for someone who deserted you and your child, how does someone go on or move forward?

  Still lost in thoughts of pity and sadness, I climbed the stairs. My foot slipped from the final step, and I reached for the banister as my body lost the battle with gravity. Suddenly two arms were wrapped around my waist, catching me before I hit the floor. Pulling me into a standing position, I blinked a couple of times before focusing on Dr. Bishop staring back at me.

  “Th-thank you,” I stuttered, still a little shaken.

  He didn’t say anything, only stared into my eyes. His arms still around my waist, an odd sense of comfort fell over me. Not allowing the feeling to linger, I pushed away from him. Dr. Bishop seemed to snap out of a trance.

  “I apologize.” He stepped back with clenched fists before heading toward his room.

  That night my dreams were filled with warm strong arms embracing me, comfort and heat raging through me from the man with the emerald eyes. In the morning, I would blame the raw cookie dough I consumed the prior evening.