Immortal Confessions

by Tara Fox Hall

  Quentin brought out a young whore, clean, primped, and dressed in finery. I don’t remember her name, but she was youthful and fresh.

  Louis shook his head. “No, I would prefer that woman, there,” he said, motioning to Eva, who stood near Levi. “She is more to my taste.”

  Levi growled a little, and moved in front of her.

  “Sorry, but she is oathed to me, too,” I said quickly. “Though I am not oathed to her, as I am to Anna.”

  Thank God, Quentin had insisted on that a week ago, when he had discovered the rules for a vampire host. My bites and another bear choker now adorned Eva’s neck. Anna had not been happy about me doing that then, but by her face, she understood the reason clear as crystal now.

  “She smells of your wolf,” Louis said nastily. “You wouldn’t be trying to trick me, would you, young one, saying she is yours when she is not—”

  “Enough,” Samuel said amiably. “It is no concern of ours, what he chooses to do with his Oathed Ones and friends in his chambers. We are not here because of women. Let’s get to business.”

  “Yes,” Louis said agreeably. “My apologies, sir.”

  “I thank you for your hospitality, Devlin,” Samuel said. He beckoned to the girl. “Come, my dear. Have no fear, I’m a gentleman.”

  Samuel took a polite drink from the young whore, and then Louis did, too. Afterwards, Quentin led her away, Eva and Anna in tow. As they left, Uther and his men filed in, standing at the corners of the room.

  “Would you care to sit down?” I offered, indicating a small table before a fire.

  Samuel and Louis both looked at me suspiciously. Neither of them said anything.

  Shit! In his research, Quentin had not been able to discern just where the visit should take place. As they had come to my home, I’d decided to prepare a spot to sit and talk. Apparently, that was some kind of faux pas.

  “We’d prefer outside, near our guards,” Samuel said finally. “It would have been unseemly to ask you to bring your Lady outside in this weather, her being human. But we are made of sterner stuff, as are weres.” He sniffed. “At least, the better ones.”

  “If you like, you can bring a torch for warmth,” Louis said sarcastically.

  “I’ll be fine, as will my men,” I said calmly. “Though I appreciate your concern.”

  We ventured outside into the frosty night air, our breath plumes, Uther and his men following me. At the foot of my front stairs, Samuel and Louis turned as one. That must have been a signal, as their guards began to dismount.

  In moments, Uther and Levi were at my back. Samuel’s guards fanned around him, as Louis’s did the same to him. As I expected, Samuel’s were some type of wereeagle. To my surprise, Louis’s guards were all vampires, by their smell.

  Samuel cleared his throat, and began. “Devlin, I congratulate you on taking this department of France. There has been a definite improvement in commerce here, and a decrease in killings, both vampire and other. You are to be commended.”

  That was not news to me. “Thank you.”

  “However, we need to know your plans,” Louis said seductively. “You are unknown to us, and you are clearly old. So what are you hoping to accomplish by making this sudden bid for power?”

  He wanted to know if I wanted France for myself, just as Uther had said he would. “I want a life of luxury with my Oathed One, and for those of us that are were and vampire to stop killing each other. Taking control from Guy was the easiest way to make that happen.”

  “I see,” Samuel said. “And you have no desire to make more of our kind?” It was obvious that he knew that I could.

  “No,” I said honestly. “The vampires I have met have been cowards for the most part, and also petty, present company excluded. There is a large enough vampire population in this city. We do not need more.” I gave him a penetrating look. “Why would I want to make more?”

  “For power,” Samuel said, holding my gaze. “For planning your own throne.”

  “I already have a throne, and it suits me,” I said, shrugging. “I have lived long enough to learn that having more power is not always a good thing.”

  “True,” Samuel said in an old voice. He nodded once, and started for his carriage, his guards following.

  That was it? “Was there something you wanted?” I said flatly. “To have come all this way to ask me these few questions seems a waste.”

  “Not at all,” Samuel said, baring his fangs at me. “I came to see what kind of man you are, from your bearing, and your words. I’ve seen enough to know you are a man that bears watching, Devlin Dalcon. Adieu.” He nodded once, holding my eyes, and then left for his carriage, his guards trailing behind him.

  I looked over at Louis, who was studying me.

  “What?” I said flatly.

  “He is right, you bear watching,” Louis said. “You must sense that you and I are not that far apart, in terms of age and power.”

  “That is interesting,” I said, sounding pointedly bored. “But that is all it is, an interesting fact. Because I do not want to spend the rest of my nights running a country, this department is more than enough. As I said, I have an Oathed One to love.”

  “She’ll die before the year is out, unless you turn her,” Louis said with a little relish. “The older you are and the more powerful your blood, the less humans can withstand it.”

  I pretended to be dismayed, which wasn’t hard. Inside, I was frantically trying to hold onto my emotions, that my face not betray my panic. “Must it happen?”

  “I’m afraid so,” he said with a kind of resignation. “But know that a little of your blood will turn her easily, so she does not have to die. As it is, you must be sharing blood with her only once a week, if that, to not have turned her so far. I know you have a demon, and probably at least access to a witch, if not one of your own, to heal her, so you don’t have to use your blood. That’s good. Take her blood sparingly. Even the saliva in your kiss can be enough, with old ones such as us. Sometimes, just an influx of our seed can be enough, if enough blood has been shared already—”

  Louis was earnest; he clearly meant his words to help. As Anna was my spoken reason for staying small-town, he had an interest in wanting to keep her alive. But his next words were lost in the fear for Anna that threatened to consume me. God, I hadn’t even considered my seed could turn her. Quentin had alluded to that the very day I’d met him and I hadn’t even thought about what that meant for Anna. We’d made love nearly every night since we’d known each other, even with me only taking her blood every other night. I always gave her my blood to heal, always! I gritted my fangs painfully, and managed to keep a smooth face. Yet it was for nothing, as that bastard knew anyway.

  “Calm yourself,” Louis said. “I have turned a great many females, and I scent no turning in her. She does have an unbelievably sweet smell that I find intriguing.” He got to his feet. “It’s a pity she is already oathed to you, and cannot be shared.”

  I stifled my anger. “It was informative to meet you, sir.”

  “And I, you,” he said, baring his fangs. Then he laughed. “And who knows? You’ve no doubt made enemies, with your fast rise to power.” He grinned again evilly. “Anna may yet come under my fangs, if she manages to outlast you. But don’t fear, Devlin, I’ll most certainly take good care of her, should something happen to you.”

  Louis walked to his carriage, his guards after him. I was vibrating in anger, but Uther was holding me back with Rip’s help, even as Levi changed to wolf and went after Louis to verify he was really leaving Fontainebleau.

  “Bastard!” I spat. “How dare he come into my house and threaten my loved one! How dare he threaten me?”

  “He is Lord here,” Rip said with a shrug. “Lords are used to doing what they want.”

  “He answers only to Samuel,” Uther rasped. “And Samuel does not care what he does, so long as France’s vampires do not complain to the point he must listen. Samuel has his hands full with negotiating
peace between feuding Rulers whose countries have been at war, the Luddites in Britain, and the several Spanish colonies that are leaving their motherland. Louis’s leash is a long one.”

  “I’m going to have to kill him to keep her safe,” I said wearily.

  “You are going to do nothing but run this province, and keep your head down,” Uther rasped. “There is no point in attacking him, as you’ll lose. He has more than demons guarding him, Devlin.”

  Who was master here? “What guards him, other than vampires and a demon?”

  “Those fanged guards are at least thirty in mortal years, and most are thirty in vampire years also. Most are ones that he has made. They are under his control.”

  “Guy was,” Quentin said wretchedly. “Louis made him, as he made many of the various city rulers in France.”

  “Why did you never mention this before?” I said irritably. “I might have apologized for killing him, if I’d known.”

  “Louis had no love for him,” Quentin replied. “He was just a tool, one that was fast becoming useless as Guy lost more of himself to his debauchery, ignoring his duties. Louis likely would have replaced Guy himself by now.” He caught my eyes. “But it would have been with another lackey, not a wild card he could not control.”

  “The issue is not the vampires,” Uther said angrily. “It is Anthony; the wereman Louis has working for him, running things. He is fifth.”

  I turned to Uther in confusion. “What’s that mean, fifth?”

  “There are men known as mercenaries, fighters, assassins. Muscle for hire, if you will. The best are ranked.”

  I looked over at Levi. “Are you ranked?”

  Levi looked mournful, and a little dejected. “I’m not even remotely ranked, Master. I’m a plain bodyguard, nothing special.”

  Uther snorted. “You’d know if you had a ranked bodyguard, Devlin. You’d be paying though the nose for him.”

  “So we do nothing?” I said wearily.

  “That’s right,” Uther said, nodding. “But do heed Louis’s advice about Annabelle.”

  Chapter Ten

  That night, much as it killed me, I did not make love to Anna. The next night was the same. On the third night, she asked me hesitantly what was wrong.

  I wanted to lie to her, to tell her that nothing was wrong. But she saw immediately on my face I was upset, and as soon as I looked into her worried eyes, I told her all of it.

  “I have been fine so far,” she said, snuggling into me. “I think he was trying to scare you, Dev. I have never felt tired, or in any way odd.”

  “Anna, are you willing to risk it? It is your life we are speaking of.”

  She looked up at me, resolute. “I know that! What other choice is there? I know you Dev, and I know if you are not with me, you are going to seek out another lover, before long.”

  I began to protest.

  “Shh, I knew that about you from the first, and there is nothing to say, it is how you are. If you are truly worried, we can stop sharing blood for a while, if you like.”

  I did not like, not at all. But I agreed it was best.

  * * * *

  Another few months passed. Things were quiet, quiet enough I journeyed with Quentin to Australia, and to Africa, and to New Zealand, to see some of the investments that had born fruit, leaving Anna in Levi and Uther’s care. Rip helped, as he was able to teleport us, moving us with his mind, though back then he could only go short distances, and even then, only once a day. And even though it shortened a year’s trip into a month, I was still gone from Anna a long time. Long enough that I admit I had Rip mix me up a potion to subvert my desire, so I would not be tempted. Problem was, he wasn’t a sorcerer, and the potion did not quell my lust for flesh; it instead turned it into lust for blood. Lucky for me, the lands we went to were flush with brothels, and there were many pimps who cared little about the health of their women, so long as they were paid well.

  When I finally returned a month later, bearing many presents for Anna, she was not waiting there for me. Levi was there alone. I noticed he looked nervous at once.

  I seized him. “Where is she?”

  “In her rooms,” he said, whining in fear. “She refused to let me contact you! She says she is tired, Devlin, she has no appetite, and she is cold, cold as you are—”

  I ran to our room without letting him finish, dropping presents left and right. I got to our room and threw open the door.

  Anna lay there sleeping peacefully. Yet even from where I stood, I could see she was far too pale. Her skin was cold when I smoothed her hair back from her face.

  “You’re home,” she mumbled. She reached for me, but she couldn’t seem to make her fingers work to grab hold of my hand.

  “Shh,” I said, tears running down my face. “I’m here, Love. Please, Love, what is wrong? What do you need? I’ll do anything!”

  “Please hold me. I’m so cold, Dev.”

  I hesitated. I knew if I got in bed with her, I was going to have her; have her and bite her, too, because all I’d thought of for days was coming back to her and burying my cool flesh in the warmth of hers, and drinking her sweet blood.

  What if I killed her? What if I turned her?

  “Dev, please,” she whispered. “I need you.”

  I yanked at my clothes, ripping them off, and then I crawled in beside her, taking her body in my arms. She moaned at once in longing and began writhing.

  “Take me,” she groaned. “Please, Dev, please, God, I’ve wanted you for days, it’s like agony!”

  I froze. Anna had always been an active participant in our lovemaking, but she’d never acted like this.

  “Fuck me,” she whispered eagerly. “I’ve longed to feel your hardness inside me. Please, Dev!”

  I shuddered, and parted her legs. I touched her, and she was a river, she was so ready to be loved. With a loud moan, I sank into her, and she let out a frantic scream.

  “Bite me!” she shouted. “Take me!”

  I lost it completely. I bit down hard, swallowing, even as I came again and again, almost convulsing. I felt her under me, climaxing over and over, her body spasming around mine. I immersed myself in her body and blood. It was only when she stopped moving that I realized she’d slipped into unconsciousness.

  I slipped my fangs and body out of her, and took her still face in my hands.

  “Anna? Anna!”

  God, what if she was turning, and I didn’t give her enough of my blood to turn? Would she wake up? What if I’d killed her?

  Frantically I shouted her name.

  She didn’t stir.

  I grabbed a penknife from the dresser drawer and cut my neck vein. A gout of blood came out. I grabbed her still form, and pressed her face to my neck, hoping it wouldn’t choke her. She moved immediately, and I felt a stab of pain, as she bit down hard. Then pleasure flooded my mind, as she began drinking from me.

  God, it was so good. To feel her there, her flesh buried in mine. I moved her lower body over slightly, and impaled her again, groaning. She bit down again, harder, and I came again, spasming hard into her as I let out a scream.

  God, this felt better than anything I’d ever done with any woman in my life. It was like a never-ending orgasm. It was incomparable.

  I took breath to scream again in joy, and noticed Anna’s scent was changing. It was becoming like mine, the sweet scent oozing out to be replaced with bitterness.

  I thrust her back from me even as she fought me, snapping her teeth. I threw her off me forcefully, and she came back snarling, her fangs bared, her eyes tinged with red. I grabbed hold of her wrists, and she clawed at me.

  “Stop, Anna! Please stop!”

  She hissed at me, fangs again bared.

  I steeled myself and slapped her sharply, knocking her back on the bed. Anna lay there, breathing steadily, and didn’t move. She was again unconscious.

  I swallowed hard and brushed away tears, hating myself for striking her, even if it had been necessary. I got dres
sed and checked my throat. My wound had healed, as had hers.

  I covered us up carefully, and hugged her body close to mine gently. Anna did not wake when I brought her into my arms. I was glad of it, as she had fangs like mine, and I thought it would probably terrify her to feel them with her tongue. It was likely she’d cut herself with them, too, if she wasn’t careful.

  It had taken me a long time to learn how to sing after I was turned. Talking had been painful, too, having both upper and lower teeth so sharp. It took time to learn, especially as I hadn’t had a teacher. Anna would have me. That was something.

  “You’ll be okay,” I whispered to her over and over. “I love you, and you’ll be okay, Anna.”

  Sometime in the early morning hours, I fell asleep. When I awoke the next evening, I saw Anna’s teeth had returned to normal. Her body had also returned to its usual temperature. There was no scent about her other than her normal one.

  We had stopped—I had stopped myself—in time.

  I gave her a light kiss, and she awoke. She looked up at me happily, and then a shadow passed over her face as she remembered what had happened. She let out a sob, and then clutched me to her hard. I clutched her just as hard, crying myself.

  “Shh,” I managed finally. “You are okay. We’re okay.”

  “You hit me,” she managed. “You’ve never hit me before, Dev. You’ve never even raised your voice.”

  “I’m sorry,” I said tearfully. “I didn’t know what else to do to make you come back to yourself. Please, Love, forgive me.”

  “I forgive you,” she whispered. “Forgive me for attacking you. I wanted your blood, Dev. I wanted it like nothing I’ve ever wanted before.”

  “I know,” I said. “We have to be careful, Anna. You almost turned last night.”

  She used her tongue to quickly check her mouth, relief on her face as she looked up at me. “Would you still love me? If I had turned?”

  “I’ll always love you,” I said tenderly. “But I don’t want this darkness for you, Love, this drinking blood and living only at night.”