The Heart of The Beast

by Susan Kohler

  As soon as they were out of earshot, the servant asked, “Beauty, how is your lady mother?”

  “She is very ill,” Beauty told him gently. “I think it’s mainly from sorrow. She misses my father deeply, and she has lost much.”

  “Oft I’ve wanted to leave the castle and see her but I wasn’t sure if it would be wise,” he said with quiet dignity. “Or if I would even be welcome.”

  “You are always welcome, Seth, but ‘tis true we have as little to do with the castle inhabitants as possible,” she shrugged sadly. “I never thought I would step foot into the place again.”

  The servant looked at her gently and said, “I sent the word to Nate about your brother but I was torn apart by it. I both hoped and feared that you would come, Beauty. I fretted over it all day for I knew of no other way for Tom’s life to be spared, but it breaks my heart to see you come to such a state. I feel as if I’ve failed your father.”

  “Seth, my old friend, that’s not true,” Beauty told him gently. Her quiet acceptance of the situation had increased as soon as the Beast was out of sight. “Do you disapprove of me?”

  “I disapprove of the situation, lass, never of you,” Seth told her gently. “I will strive to help you in any way I can.”

  “Thank you, Seth.” She gasped as a thought hit her. “How is it that you had to ask which Tom should be released? You know my brother well.”

  The servant shrugged, “I hoped the Beast would be so blinded by your beauty that he would do just what he did. I took a chance that he would let both lads go. The other poor lad had no one to save him. It worked, did it not?” The servant winked as he held the barn door open for her.

  A short time later, after a tearful exchange with her brother, Beauty returned to the great hall and presented herself to the maid, Gwyneth. She soon found herself in the knight’s great bedchamber, a large room that seemed to be barren except for a fireplace, a wardrobe against a wall, a small table, a mirror, a chair and a great big bed. There was a large fur rug on the floor in front of the fireplace.

  The bed seemed to Beauty to take up all the room. It was a four-poster, made of rich dark wood and covered with deep intricate carving. There was a deep feather mattress, crisp linen sheets, and great piles of fur coverings for warmth and comfort.

  The fireplace was already lit against the evening chill. A large metal tub was brought into the room and placed before the fireplace. Men had been ordered to bring hot water to fill the tub.

  The maid had brought a silver platter of food with her, tender meats, bread and ripe fruits. She ordered Beauty to eat as they waited for the tub to be filled. Beauty’s nerves were stretched so tight that her stomach rebelled at the thought of food but she had not eaten since early morn. She was hungry and she knew she would need her strength to get through the night ahead. Flashing a grateful smile at the maid, she picked at the food.

  When she’d eaten all she could force down her tight throat, Beauty stood beside the tub, submitting herself to the dubious ministrations of the maid. The maid was a middle-aged woman, maybe forty, dressed in a plain, straight grey dress, with white lace at the neck and cuffs. Her brown hair was lightly streaked with grey, and pulled severely back into a tight bun. There was no welcoming light in her soft brown eyes. She seemed to take Beauty’s presence in the castle as just another distraction, a source of still more chores to be done.

  She barely spoke to Beauty, and when she did, not in very civilized tones. She barely let the two men finish pouring boiling water into a large metal tub before she stripped Beauty’s clothes right off her body, ripping them, and silently pointed at the steaming bathtub.

  Without a word Beauty stepped into the water, visibly flinching at the scalding heat. She gave control of her body over to the austere servant who bathed her, scrubbing her vigorously and roughly all over. The maid then washed and rinsed her long hair. Beauty stood as the maid dried her with a rough towel. The maid towelled her hair, then brushed it dry. Lastly, she rubbed scented oil over Beauty’s skin, frowning as she noted the calluses on Beauty’s hands.

  Finishing her silent inspection, the maid finally spoke to Beauty.

  She asked coldly, “Who are you Lass? And why are you here?”

  “I’m just a peasant from the village,” Beauty answered softly, shyly. “And I’m here to save my brother’s life.”

  “Your brother was one of the lads who was supposed to be hanged?” The maid was surprised, muttering, “Queer business that.”

  “How so?” Beauty’s interest was piqued and she forgot her nudity.

  “Tis a bit of a mystery how the theft came to the master’s attention. No one actually saw the theft and no one noticed any grain missing, so who told the head guard? ’Twas Gerrin himself told the tale to the master,” the maid puzzled. “Anyway that’s not what I was asking you. Who are you?”

  “Just one of the villagers. They call me Beauty,” she replied calmly.

  “Tis fitting enough,” the maid chuckled almost against her will. “But it’s not your given name, I’ll wager, and you are not just one of the village maidens.”

  “I lived there before tonight,” Beauty asserted, uncertain just what this woman knew about her. “In the village.”

  “Sure lass, if that’s what you want me to believe.” The maid paused. “Be ye a virgin?”

  “Yea.” The reply was soft and nervous, the truthfulness of the claim written all over Beauty’s face.

  “Have courage, lass,” the maid said softly. “Many of the stories you’ve heard about my master are not true. He’s a rough man to be sure, but he’s a good man inside. I believe he has love and mercy locked away somewhere inside him but he doesn’t know it yet.”

  “How can a man not know when he holds human emotions deep inside his soul?” Beauty puzzled aloud.

  “He was raised not to show any emotion at all, except anger and ferocity. Any trace of humanity was soon thrashed out of him. He needs a strong woman who can show him the secrets of the heart, one who can teach mercy to the Beast. ’Tis a job that will take a great deal of inner strength.” The older woman looked Beauty over carefully and poured her a glass of dark Spanish wine.

  Her manner gentled and her tone softened. “You just may be the one.”

  “What one?” Beauty refused to see the woman’s point and ignored the proffered glass.

  “God’s truth, the woman who can tame the Beast!” The woman smiled softly as Beauty gasped. “It’ll be the hardest thing you’ve ever tried. Take the wine.” She paused until Beauty did so. “You’ll need the courage of a legion of fighting men and the patience of a saint, and all the endurance you can muster. You might be able to do it though. I’ve a feeling.”

  “Why would I try to tame the Beast? Right now, I just want to survive the night,” Beauty said softly, sipping the rich wine. “I want to serve the Beast well enough so that he doesn’t regret the bargain we made.”

  “Someone has to reach his soul, to find the man within. With courage, you will be the one. Me name’s Gwyneth. Seek me out in the kitchen in the morning if you need aught. And drink at least one more glass of the wine before he comes to you, maybe two, but no more,” the maid told her softly before putting a soft, sheer gown of linen and delicate white lace over Beauty’s head and leading her to the bed. “Two or three glasses may help ye, but any more would truly make things worse.”

  The maid waited for Beauty to get into the bed before she stepped out into the hall and ordered the men in to empty the tub. Alone in the huge bed waiting for the Beast to come to and take her, Beauty was more than nervous, she was truly scared. She sipped a second glass of wine as she looked within herself, deep into her heart and soul. She decided that the only way she could keep her promise to the Beast and her own self-respect was to accept the promise she’d made, within her own heart and mind at least, as a marriage vow.

  After she spent time with the Beast she knew she would be ruined, far too much in disgrace to ever marry another man an
yway. To her, for the sake of her sanity, this had to be a marriage and she would honour it as such even though there was no priest and even though to the Beast it would be a mere dalliance. Her resolve was firm as she came to a kind of peace within her own mind. As the maid had suggested, a third glass of wine helped.

  Waiting alone in the huge bed, she clung to the thought of her brother and remembered their hurried conversation earlier in the main barn.

  The barn was a large wooden shed, with stalls for more than twenty horses, a hayloft, and piles of deep clean straw and sweet smelling hay. A room off to one side held tack and armour, while off to the other side stood a forge where several blacksmiths constantly laboured over the making of horseshoes, swords and arrowheads, along with other weapons and crude tools.

  Both of the condemned men were held deep in the far end of the stables. She found her brother Tom chained to the wall in a stall filled with dirty hay. He and the other Tom, a lanky youth, were both considered too lowly and unworthy to even be taken to the dungeon. Both of the men had soiled their clothes from being tied up all day unable to undo their pants, and the stench in the stall was foul. As soon as they were unchained, the other Tom ran home, leaving Beauty alone with her brother.

  Tom was covered with filth. He had been beaten almost beyond Beauty’s recognition. His handsome face was covered with bruises and his dark brown eyes were filled with despair and fear. His dark blonde hair was dirty and matted. Tom loved his sister dearly and once he learned of the bargain, he had pleaded with her to leave him to his fate and save herself but she held fast. She could not bear to see him hung. He wanted her to run but she refused to flee.

  “He’d just hang us both! You know there is no escape from the lord,” Beauty sobbed. “Furthermore, I gave him my vow. You know I cannot break it.”

  “I know you always honour your word, Beauty, but I don’t want you to end up like Molly!” Tom protested, tears in his eyes. “I cannot leave you to the Beast. It would kill our mother.”

  “I can only hope and pray that I don’t meet the same fate as Molly. You know that I have to be the one who stays here, brother. First, because I love you, but also because I have looked at the facts with a cold reason. See it like this: If you are hung, we will not be able to keep from starving, lest I turn into a whore. If I stay with the Beast, you will be able to provide for Nate and mother, and only one of us will be lost. True, he will certainly disgrace and dishonour me, he may even kill me, but as long as the three of you are safe I know I will, in some small way, manage to be content.” Beauty said before adding cautiously, “I do believe however, against all reason, that all will turn out well in the end.”

  “Sister!” Tom was shocked. “Could it be that you are attracted to the Beast? Do you have soft feelings for this monster of a man?”

  “I confess that he is the most beautiful man I have ever seen, brother, but I am deathly afraid of him. He scares me with his smallest glance. Indeed, he is almost inhuman, with no trace of compassion or mercy in him.” Beauty lowered her gaze. “Nevertheless, I did give him my promise. I will strive to love him and to give him my affection for showing you mercy. I will try to keep my word, in all ways. Tis true, I fear him greatly but I made my choice and I gave my word. I’m glad to be able to save you. Pray for me, please God, pray that it will all be well for me.”

  “I’ll pray for you, Beauty.” Tom hugged her tight before he let her go reluctantly, ignoring the tears in her eyes. “And I’ll work to find a way to save you.”

  “Do not. Do not even think of it,” Beauty replied firmly. “And please God, Tom, do not attempt any vengeance. ’Twould be the death of us all, Nate and our mother too.” She held his eyes and put all her love into her words. “From this night on, I will be dead to you and our family, and disgraced as well. My only salvation, Tom, is you. As long as you are safe, dear brother, I will find some happiness. Go home now and see to our mother and Nate but remember to return on the morrow to work here.”

  “How can I work here knowing what must be happening to you inside the castle?” Tom muttered.

  “You have to, else our mother and Nate will surely perish. It might be that your job will even give us a chance to see each other once in a while, even though as of now he commands me to swear never to see any of my family again. It’s a small barn, and mayhap I’ll get to ride with him sometimes,” Beauty whispered, hugging him close. “Go now. Be strong and pray for me that I’m all right.”

  The poignant memory of those few precious moments with her brother strengthened her resolve to please the Beast. Beauty waited in his bed, dreading the arrival of the Beast, and yet hoping he’d come soon so that she could find out what fate held in store for her. The wine helped a bit but the waiting was fearful and seemed to last forever. Before long however, she heard his footsteps, sure and heavy, coming up the hall. In that instant, it seemed to Beauty that the wait had not been long enough, that the Beast had come to her all too soon.

  Chapter Three

  The Beast entered his bedchamber and slammed the door. Suddenly the large room appeared to grow smaller to Beauty. The very walls seemed to be closing in on her and she felt trapped. Her breath caught in her throat and she struggled to breathe as the very air surrounding her seemed to suddenly turn thick and sluggish. In spite of the wine, she began to tremble, shaking uncontrollably. The Beast appeared to ignore her completely, not looking her way or speaking as his hands went to the fastenings of his clothes. His very silence further unnerved her.

  Lying there on the bed, looking at him as he quickly shed his clothes, she was both terrified and mesmerized by his strong, muscular body and his physical perfection. In spite of what she’d heard both from him and about him, the real shock though came when he removed his tunic and saw the multitude of scars covering his perfect form. As he briefly turned his back, she gasped as she noticed that although there were several obvious battle wounds on him, his back was almost completely covered with old scars that seemed to have come from countless merciless whippings.

  “Is something bothering you, lass?” the Beast mumbled, irritated and still looking for her to try to back out of her agreement, “Or are you finding your agreement easier to make than to keep?”

  “Nay, M’lord, I was but shocked to see the proof of your words about how you’d been raised, M’lord, and the reminders of how many battles you’ve fought. ’Tis rare for one so young to have been in so many wars, but the truth of your words is reflected by the great number of scars on your body.” Beauty met his gaze and whispered, “Any man who has lived the life you must have lived and seen such ugliness as you’ve witnessed would surely have to be completely hardened to the softer emotions, truly.”

  “You think my body’s ugly, lass?” the Beast growled, deliberately misunderstanding her. “It makes no difference to me.”

  “No! I think you have a truly well made body, M’lord, ‘tis strong and well muscled. You have a very pleasing face too. ‘Tis what’s been done to you that’s ugly.” Beauty paused, not realizing that her words had pleased him strangely. “I don’t like to think of anyone, let alone the one man I have promised to love, undergoing so much torment and suffering. Remember, M’lord, I have promised to love you in my own way.”

  “Rest easy, lass.” The Beast almost smiled in spite of himself. “It’s far too late to change the past and it served to toughen me, to make me fit to lead vast armies, to fight battles and to win wars, and to rule.”

  “I don’t believe you have to be so hard to rule. The old lord ruled this land wisely and yet with compassion, M’lord. He was clearly respected by the serfs but also well loved by them. He knew how to rule reasonably with justice tempered by mercy. The local peasants prospered but so did he and his family. He was widely known to truly love his wife and children, and they loved him deeply,” Beauty pointed out, a slight tremor in her voice. “He was truly a fair and just man.”

  “And now the old lord is dead,” the Beast countered coldly, stalkin
g over to the bed.

  He sat on the edge of the bed and removed his hose and boots. “And his family has disappeared. Now his castle is mine to hold, his lands and peasants mine to rule. Does that not prove he was too weak?”

  “And would you, with all your cold, bitter fury and strength of will have withheld against an invading horde any better than he did? Your King sent ten times as many men as the old lord had, all of them well trained and heavily armed. It was not lack of strength or courage that brought the old lord down but overwhelming odds, lack of trained fighting men and good weapons,” Beauty pointed out.

  “What brought this matter to your mind now? Do you seek to argue or reason your way out of my bed?” The Beast stood up and walked over to fetch the wine, then returned and stood looking down at her.

  “No, M’lord, I went at it clumsily but I wanted to point out that here, in this one place, the warrior can also be a man. You can drop your guard and still be safe,” Beauty said proudly. “I will not betray you but will stand proudly beside you in times of strife.”

  “Be warned, lass, for I am not a fool. I know what is said behind my back, that someday I’ll meet the woman who can tame the Beast. I think there’s something more on your pretty mind. I think you seek to be that woman, to be the one to tame the Beast. The woman who can teach me what love is,” the Beast grinned without any humour in it. “Beware my lass, for it cannot be done, and certainly not by the likes of you.”

  “Tame the Beast? Ha! What mere woman could manage such a miracle?” Beauty responded with seeming calm but somewhere deep inside her soul the idea had taken root.

  She looked up at him as he stood by the bed, naked. Her emotions were jumbled but her mind was clear and fixed. She knew the risks she took by being there with the Beast, not only in his bed but also in his hands, and under his control. In her heart, mayhap to ease her conscience, she saw this pact much as an arranged marriage.