Zelda

by Nancy Milford

  173 “I wish I could see you…”: ZSF to FSF, n.d. (ca. August/September 1930).

  174–176 Once when things seemed very black…: Prangins, Summer 1930.

  176 “I have read Zelda’s manuscripts…”: Maxwell Perkins to FSF, August 5, 1930.

  176 Scott replied that he…: Letters, p. 224.

  176 She wrote Scott:…“Please…”; ZSF to FSF, n.d. (ca. end of August 1930).

  177 “I seem awfully queer…”: ZSF to FSF, n.d.

  177 He hypnotized Zelda…: Dr. Oscar Forel to NM, May 6, 1966.

  178 “Goofy, my darling…”: ZSF to FSF, n.d.

  178 Although by the end of October…: Prangins.

  179 Dr. Forel says…: Dr. Oscar Forel to NM, May 6, 1966.

  179 Dr. Forel wrote…: Prangins, October 15, 1930.

  179 Scott wrote Judge and Mrs. Sayre…: FSF to Judge and Mrs. Sayre, December 1, 1930.

  179 Zelda’s personal reaction…: Dr. Oscar Forel to FSF, December 1, 1930. (“…que votre femme traite de grand imbécile.”)

  179 Bleuler told Scott…: FSF to Judge and Mrs. Sayre, December 1, 1930.

  180 “It is excellent…”: ZSF to Scottie, ca. winter 1930.

  181 “I know this then—…”. FSF, “Written with Zelda Gone to the Clinique,” n.d.

  183 (fn) According to his biographer…: Arthur Mizener, The Far Side of Paradise, p. 56.

  183 “Your letter is not…”: ZSF to FSF, n.d. (ca. summer 1930).

  184 “I am tired of rummaging my head…”: ZSF to FSF, n.d.

  185 He said that, although a first-year medical…: FSF to Dr. Oscar Forel, January 29, 1931.

  185 “In brief my idea is this…”: Ibid.

  186 “Then she went into the other personality…”: Ibid.

  186 She ate her meals at the table…: Prangins.

  187 “I keep thinking of Provence…”: ZSF to FSF, n.d. (ca. spring 1931).

  188 “I can’t write…”: ZSF to FSF, n.d. (ca. spring 1931).

  188 Gerald Murphy, who was living with his family…: Gerald Murphy to NM, interview, March 2, 1964.

  189 “I went to Geneva all by myself…”: ZSF to FSF, n.d. (ca. spring 1931).

  189 They said they would never…: CU, pp. 52–53.

  190 “My dearest and most precious…”: ZSF to FSF, n.d. (ca. end of July 1931).

  190 “At first we were petrified…”: Gerald Murphy to NM, interview, March 2, 1964.

  190 “Well, it’s all written…”: Ibid. See Tender, pp. 261–265.

  191 “Please don’t be depressed…”: ZSF to FSF, n.d. (ca. summer 1931).

  191 Her case was summarized…: Prangins.

  191 Earlier that year…: ZSF to FSF, n.d.

  Chapter 12

  192 Zelda wrote. “In Alabama…”: CU, p. 54.

  193 By October Scott was bored…: Ledger, p. 186.

  193 He wrote at the top…: Ibid.

  193 “You know the kind: women of fifty…”: ZSF to FSF, n.d.

  All of Zelda’s letters to Scott which are quoted in this chapter were written between the end of October and December 20, while he was in Hollywood. None were dated.

  194…She finished at least seven stories…: “All About the Down’s Case” (the revised story), “Cotton Belt,” “Sweet Chariot,” “Getting Away From It All,” “The Story Thus Far,” “A Myth in A Moral,” and “A Couple of Nuts.”

  194 “Please tell me your frank opinion…”: ZSF to Harold Ober, December 21, 1931.

  194 The story is about a young American couple…: “A Couple of Nuts,” Scribner’s Magazine, August 1932, pp. 80, 82, 84.

  195 The story was reviewed in St. Paul…: James Gray, “St. Paul’s Family of Writers Have Almost Scribner’s Monopoly.” The St. Paul Dispatch. This newspaper clipping is in one of Zelda’s clipping albums.

  197 In an obituary in the Montgomery newspaper…: The Montgomery Advertiser, November 19, 1931.

  201 In late November Scott wrote Dr. Forel…: FSF to Dr. Forel, November 1931.

  202 In the December issue of Scribner’s…: “Miss Ella,” Scribner’s Magazine, December 1931, pp. 661–665.

  203 Miss Ella’s life seems as orderly…: Ibid., p. 663.

  204 “Even her moments of relaxation were…”: Ibid., p. 661.

  205 Their plans for a life together were…: Ibid., pp. 663–664.

  207 Buoyed by their holiday, Scott wrote…: Letters, p. 226.

  208 Without warning a spot of eczema…: FSF to Dr. Oscar Forel, February 1, 1932.

  208 “She had been working all day …”: Ibid.

  208 Scott was worried and told Forel: “For the first time…”: Ibid.

  209 “My haste,” Scott later wrote…: FSF to Dr. Oscar Forel, April 18, 1932.

  Chapter 13

  213 The end of February Zelda wrote…: ZSF to Scottie, n.d. (postmarked February 29, 1932).

  214 In his Ledger he wrote, “Scotty…”: Ledger, p. 186.

  214 Zelda seemed to understand how deeply…: ZSF to FSF, n.d.

  214 A friend of theirs remembers Fitzgerald gently…: John Tilley to NM, interview, July 27, 1963.

  214 “We always have such fun pricking …”: ZSF to FSF, n.d. (ca. February, 1932).

  215 “I am reading Ian Gordon’s…”: Ibid.

  215 “I am proud of my novel…”: ZSF to FSF, n.d. (ca. end of February/early March 1932).

  215 “The lack of continuity in her novel…”: FSF to Dr. Mildred T. Squires, March 8, 1932.

  216 Zelda sent it immediately to Maxwell Perkins…: ZSF to Maxwell Perkins, n.d. (postmarked March 12, 1932).

  216 For four years, he wrote, he had been forced…: FSF to Dr. Mildred T. Squires, March 14, 1932.

  216 “It is getting more and more difficult…”: Ibid.

  217 His anger did not subside and two days later he wired…: FSF to Maxwell Perkins, March 16, 1932.

  217 In January, 1932, he proceeded to sketch out a longer novel…-.Letters, p. 226.

  217 In early spring Scott drew up his “General Plan”…: This material as well as the “Further Sketch” and the chart paralleling Zelda’s case with Nicole Diver’s—reproduced for the first time—is drawn from the Fitzgerald Collection at Princeton University Library.

  219 His income in 1931 was at its apex…: Ledger, p. 67.

  220 “Dr. Squires tells me you are hurt…”: ZSF to FSF, n.d. (ca. March 1932).

  221 She answered: “Dear—You know…”: ZSF to FSF, n.d. (ca. March 1932).

  221 “Of cource, I glad[ly] submit to anything…”: ZSF to FSF, n.d. (ca. March 1932).

  222 Yet at the end of March just before he left Alabama…: FSF to Dr. Mildred T. Squires (ca. March 1932).

  222 On the other hand, he could not “stand always…”: Ibid.

  Chapter 14

  224 Save Me the Waltz is not a defense…: SMTW, p. 57.

  224 “Zelda’s novel is now good…”: Letters, pp. 226–227.

  225 Then he asked Perkins to keep whatever praise…: Ibid., p. 227.

  225 “… I’m not certain enough of Zelda’s present…”: Ibid.

  225 He wrote: “Here is Zelda’s novel…”: Ibid., p. 228.

  225 Somewhat cavalierly Fitzgerald added that he would withdraw his restraint on praise…: Ibid., pp. 228–229.

  226 Alabama has overheard David telling Miss Gibbs…: SMTW, pp. 109–111.

  226 The following morning…: Ibid., p. 117.

  227 “I can’t stand this any longer…”: Ibid.

  227 When David tells her that he understands…: Ibid., p. 118.

  227 But she has also turned to the dance…: Ibid., p. 116.

  227 Alabama says, “Can’t you understand that…”: Ibid., p. 141.

  228 She establishes the Judge’s importance at the beginning…: Ibid., p. 3.

  228–229 He is “entrenched… in his integrity…”: Ibid.

  229 “By the time the Beggs children had learned…”: Ibid., p. 4.

  229 It is to her that the girls turn
for relief…: Ibid., p. 5.

  229 “Millie, who had never had a very strong sense of reality…”: Ibid., pp. 4–5.

  230 “The wide and lawless generosity…”: Ibid., p. 11.

  230 “Tell me about myself when I was little…”: Ibid., pp. 5–6.

  231 “And did I cry at night and raise Hell…”: Ibid., p. 6.

  231 “White things gleam in the dark…”: Ibid., p. 7.

  232 “She grows older sleeping…”: Ibid., p. 8.

  232 When the war comes Alabama plans “to escape…”: Ibid., p. 29.

  232 She falls in love with the romantic figure…: Ibid., p. 37.

  232 “Say, ‘dear,’” he said…: Ibid., p. 38.

  232 “So much she loved the man…”: Ibid.

  233 (fn) “His whole life has been torn…”: R. D. Laing, The Divided Self, An Existential Study in Sanity and Madness, Penguin Books, Baltimore, 1965, p. 37.

  232 Alabama, then, in a fantasy, enters David’s head…: Ibid.

  233 “‘The tops of buildings shine like crowns…’ “: Ibid., p. 40.

  234 Alabama turns to memories of her father for sustenance: “She thought…”: Ibid., p. 129.

  234 “Alabama’s peculiar genius lay…”: Ibid., p. 227.

  234 The first sentence was altered to read…: Ibid., p. 48.

  235 “From the sense that she had nothing…”: Ibid., p. 51.

  235 “Alabama had a way of abnegating…”: Ibid., p. 220.

  235 “Alabama had known this would be their attitude…”: Ibid., p. 55.

  235 “Understand,” the Judge was saying…. Ibid., pp. 55–56.

  236 “Wouldn’t you mind?” she said…: Ibid., p. 226.

  236 No one but Alabama has dressed for dinner…: Ibid., pp. 229–230.

  236 Alabama thinks, “If they hadn’t been so completely impervious…”: Ibid., p. 231.

  236 Alabama reflects, “‘Another tie broken…’”: Ibid., p. 233.

  237 “The top of New York twinkled like a golden canopy…”: Ibid., pp. 46–47.

  237 Then David says: “I’ll have to do lots of work…”: Ibid., p. 47.

  237 “…she hadn’t been absolutely sure…”: Ibid., p. 50.

  238 “Vincent Youmans wrote a new tune…”: Ibid., p. 56.

  238 “The New York rivers dangled lights along the banks…”: Ibid., pp. 56–57.

  238 “It costs more to ride on the tops of taxis…”: Ibid., pp. 57, 60.

  239 The foliage is “black.”…: Ibid., p. 72.

  239 “Pastel cupids frolicked amidst the morning-glories…”: Ibid., p. 79.

  239 “‘It’s a man’s world…’”: Ibid., p. 80.

  239 “When she was a child and the days…”: Ibid., p. 90.

  239 She says, “‘Yes—I don’t know…’”: Ibid., p. 93.

  240 “I’ll have to tell him…”: Ibid.

  240 She rips up the letter, and “Though it broke her heart…”: Ibid., p. 98.

  240 This is an almost exact repetition…: Ibid., p. 29.

  240 He wrote one of Zelda’s doctors…: FSF to Dr. Thomas Rennie, May 28, 1933.

  240 It is only when the Knights leave the Riviera…: SMTW, p. 99.

  241 In Paris the flowers are artificial…: Ibid., p. 102.

  241 In that Parisian world of parties…: Ibid., p. 106.

  241 “I think…that it would be the very thing…”: Ibid., p. 113.

  241 “Life has become practically intolerable…”: ZSF to FSF, n.d.

  242 Alabama pushes her body beyond the pain…: SMTW, p. 127.

  242 “Why will you never come out…”: Ibid., p. 126.

  242 “Yellow roses she bought with her money like Empire…”: Ibid., pp. 138–139.

  242 “‘You’re so thin,’ said David…”: Ibid., p. 147.

  243 “The bones had begun to come up in her nose…”: Ibid., p. 174.

  243 There is no car, but “a flea-bitten…”: Ibid., pp. 175–176.

  244 “We should have taken the train-de-luxe…”: Ibid., p. 180.

  244 As Bonnie looks about her she notices “Ladies…”: Ibid., p. 181.

  244 “Riding home through the flickering night…”: Ibid., p. 187.

  245 “Oh, my father, there are so many things…”: Ibid., p. 199.

  245 “Her father!” she had written before Alabama…: Ibid., p. 195.

  246 “‘He must have forgot,’ Alabama said…”: Ibid., pp. 203, 204.

  246 Alabama says: “‘We grew up founding our dreams…’”: Ibid., p. 110.

  246 “We’ve talked you to death…”: Ibid.

  246 “Always… we will have to seek some perspective …”: Ibid., p. 211.

  246 She tells David it is “very expressive…”: Ibid., p. 212.

  Chapter 15

  248 “The eyes of the psychiatrist moved…”: ZSF, “Autobiographical Sketch,” March 16, 1932. Dr. Mildred T. Squires, to whom Zelda dedicated Save Me the Waltz, is the psychiatrist referred to at the opening.

  253 “Darling, Sweet D.O.—…”: ZSF to FSF, n.d. (ca. end of March 1932).

  253 “It all went back to Zelda…”: This untitled sketch which exists in typescript and is six pages long was attached to a letter written by Fitzgerald to Dr. Squires, April 4, 1932.

  254 “Honey, when you come out into the world…”: FSF to ZSF, n.d. (ca. late spring 1932).

  255 “We have been so close this last year…”: ZSF to FSF, n.d.

  255 “Analogy”…: “Analogy,” by FSF, unpublished.

  256 Scott gave an interview to the Baltimore…: The Baltimore Evening Sun, “He Tells of Her Novel,” May 8, 1932.

  256 A colleague of Dr. Meyer…: Dr. Eleanor Pavenstedt to NM, January 15, 1969. Dr. Pavenstedt cared for Zelda during her second period at Phipps, February 12, 1934-March 8, 1934.

  256 Dr. Forel had suggested that if Zelda…: Dr. Forel to FSF, March 8, 1932. Dr. Forel to FSF, May 11, 1932.

  257 Scott wrote Dr. Squires that he wanted Zelda to take the move…: FSF to Dr. Mildred T. Squires, May 20, 1932.

  257 “We live in a nice Mozartian…”: ZSF to John Peale Bishop, n.d. (ca. summer 1932).

  258 The Turnbulls’ son Andrew, who was eleven…: Andrew Turnbull to NM, interview, August 6, 1964.

  258 “When things were going well for them…”: Ibid.

  258 Mrs. Turnbull found him a charming…: Mrs. Bayard Turnbull to NM, interview, October 12, 1963.

  259 A woman who worked as Fitzgerald’s secretary…: Mrs. Isabel Owens to NM, interview, October 12, 1963.

  259 “Dearest: I’m writing because I don’t want…”: FSF to ZSF, n.d. (ca. late summer 1932).

  260 Maxwell Perkins visited him and described…: Maxwell Perkins to Ernest Hemingway, July 22, 1932, in Editor to Author, The Letters of Maxwell E. Perkins, edited by John Hall Wheelock, Charles Scribner’s Sons, New York, 1950, p. 79.

  260 He entered in the Ledger…: Ledger, p. 186.

  262 “We are delighted with the book…”: ZSF to Maxwell Perkins, n.d. (ca. October 6. 1932).

  262 Zelda wrote Perkins unhappily after publication…: ZSF to Maxwell Perkins, n.d.

  262 Zelda liked a review written by William McFee…: Ibid.

  263 “…here is a peculiar talent…”: William McFee, “During the Jazz Age,” the New York Sun, October 8, 1932, p. 12.

  263 “In the desperate attempt to be contrary…”: Ibid.

  263 “It is not only that her publishers…”: “Of the Jazz Age,” the New York Times, October 16, 1932.

  263 “There is a warm, intelligent…”: Dorothea Brand, “Seven Novels of the Month,” The Bookman, October 1932, p. 735.

  263 Zelda told the woman…: Newspaper clipping in Zelda’s clipping album.

  264 Save Me the Waltz sold 1,392 copies…: Burroughs Mitchell to NM, February 16, 1968.

  264 Zelda earned $120.73…: Maxwell Perkins to ZSF, August 2, 1933.

  264 “Maybe I ought to have warned you…”: Ibid.

  264 “It moves me a lo
t…”: Malcolm Cowley to FSF, May 22, 1933.

  265 “But in her subconscious there is…”: FSF to Dr. Thomas Rennie, n.d. (ca. October 1932).

  Chapter 16

  266 She also wrote Perkins, saying…: ZSF to Maxwell Perkins, n.d. (ca. October 6, 1932).

  267 “He just wasn’t a stationary man…”: Mrs. Isabel Owens to NM, interview, October 12, 1963.

  267 In an article written during this period…: “One Hundred False Starts,” Afternoon of An Author, pp. 131–136.

  267 But the crowd no longer seemed to him…: Ledger, p. 68.

  268 First he blamed his mother, then Zelda…: Mrs. Isabel Owens to NM, interview, October 12, 1963.

  268 His secretary remembers them talking to each other…: Ibid.

  269 His secretary says: “The next day…”: Ibid.

  269 “We had a formal relationship…”: Ibid.

  269 Zelda wrote Maxwell Perkins…: ZSF to Maxwell Perkins, n.d. (ca. October 22, 1932).

  269 Scott’s secretary remembers her as “skinny…”: Mrs. Isabel Owens to NM, interview, October 12, 1963.

  269 Scott once wrote: “Family quarrels…”: CU, p. 198.

  270 He said that when their “conversations”…: FSF to Dr. Adolf Meyer, April 10, 1933.

  270 Scott felt that he needed some strongly enforced authority…: Ibid.

  271 “One of her reasons for gravitating…”: Ibid.

  271 Dr. Meyer answered Fitzgerald…: Dr. Adolf Meyer to FSF, April 18, 1933.

  272 “I felt that from the difference between my…”: FSF to Dr. Adolf Meyer, n.d. This letter exists in a pencil draft and may never have been sent to Dr. Meyer. It is, however, clearly a response to Meyer’s letter of April 18.

  272 He said: “I can only think of Lincoln’s…”: Ibid.

  275 In a few more years, by 1936, he would understand it more clearly…: “Author’s House,” Afternoon of An Author, p. 188.

  276 The spring before this one, sixty young students from the Baltimore area…: I am indebted to Don Swann, to Mrs. Rita Swann, and to jack Day (who played Uncle Messogony) for their reminiscences about the Vagabonds.

  276 “Ahead of me, near the gate…”: The description of Zack Maccubbin’s meeting with Zelda, his Sunday dinner with the Fitzgeralds, as well as of the rehearsals for Scandalabra, are drawn from an unpublished sketch Mr. Maccubbin, now Mr. Zack Waters, wrote October 10, 1963. Some of this material is also drawn from our interview, May 12, 1965.