Meant to Be: A Pride and Prejudice Variation

by Andreea Catana

  The three hurried to the kitchen while Elizabeth and Jane finally remained alone.

  “How are you, Jane dearest?”

  Miss Bennet’s eyes sparkled with tears.

  “If I were braver, I could say I am happy…but I dare not…not yet.”

  Elizabeth embraced her gently, grateful that her sister did not return the question. If she did, Elizabeth’s answer would have been the same. She too was not brave enough to say she was happy. It was fortunate that nobody could see the joy that made her heart beat faster and the shiver she felt in anticipation of the next day’s dinner.

  ***

  Mrs. Bennet was little seen the following day. She stayed in the kitchen, supervising each move, each dish, and each arrangement.

  While Jane looked calm, preparing herself for the event, Elizabeth could hardly keep her composure. In the morning, she took a stroll around Longbourn, but—much to her regret—she met nobody.

  When she returned, she was surprised to find a messenger in discussion with her father. She looked inquiringly but received nothing except a gesture of dismissal. Nevertheless, she waited a few steps away.

  The messenger left, and Mr. Bennet remained with the letter in his hand, looking at his favourite daughter, and then slowly moved to the library.

  Elizabeth bore her eagerness only a few minutes. Against his obvious wish of being left alone, she did not resist the urge to speak to him.

  “Papa, is something wrong?” she asked, carefully closing the door behind her.

  “No, Lizzy, it is only the final documents of the business settlement. I received a copy of it and the deposit for the 95 percent of thirty-five hundred pounds. Everything is done now. We are fine.”

  “I am sorry you are still troubled about it, Papa,”

  “I cannot help feeling that there is something more behind all this although your uncle denied he was the one purchasing my debts. I confess I am tempted to go to London and speak to Lord Brougham myself. Perhaps, I could persuade him to reveal the identity of the buyer.”

  “I doubt he would, Papa. You do not even know him; he might refuse to receive you. Please leave all this behind. If that person should wish you to know his identity, he will surely allow you to—one day.”

  “Yes, yes. If I could only speak to Lord Brougham for a little while…if I knew someone who might know him…”

  “But, Papa, why are you worried now? You have been through so much distress…”

  “Any distress I suffer is well deserved, Lizzy dear. But for now—let us enjoy our unexpected luck. And let us prepare for dinner. Mr. Darcy and Mr. Bingley will be here any moment now. I am happy to have some decent male company for dinner.”

  Elizabeth could only obey although she was still concerned. She dressed in a rush with Jane helping to arrange her hair. She felt a strange burden shadowing what should be a lovely evening that she had long dreamed of.

  The eldest sisters went downstairs just shortly before the gentlemen arrived.

  The reunion was a joyful one. Mrs. Bennet invited them all to the dining table; Mr. Bingley immediately secured a seat next to Jane while Mr. Darcy sat at Mr. Bennet’s right, facing Elizabeth.

  The first course was served and enjoyed, and the conversation slowly came together when Mr. Bennet suddenly addressed his guest.

  “Mr. Darcy, do you happen to know a Lord Brougham? Are you acquainted with him? He is a famous lawyer I am informed. It is of some importance to me to speak to him. And I could use a few details. Forgive me for troubling you, but I know nobody who might be in his proximity.”

  Elizabeth quickly looked at her father, wondering why he had brought up such a delicate subject when they had decided to abandon it.

  The question obviously startled Darcy. He put his glass down, brought the napkin to his lips, and then answered with some reluctance.

  “No. I mean, I do know him by name and reputation. He is an excellent attorney. But I do not remember being particularly acquainted with him.”

  “I see…well, perhaps it is not meant for me to meet him. Forgive me for bothering you—let us continue our dinner.”

  “There is no need to apologize, Mr. Bennet. I am sorry I cannot help you more.”

  “But, Darcy, did you not have lunch with a Lord Brougham at the club last week when I met you? Surely, they must be related since they have the same name.”

  Darcy frowned and turned pale. Elizabeth gave no significance to the exchange at first, only noticing the gentleman’s change of countenance. Their eyes met; then he averted his look and turned to Mr. Bennet briefly.

  “Yes, he might be…I gave it no special attention. I met several people during my time at the club. Only three days ago, I happened upon my uncle—Lord Matlock. Mr. Bennet, if you need any information about any member of the ton, my aunt and uncle are reliable sources. I shall inquire about it.”

  “That is true; the club is always too crowded for my taste,” Mr. Bingley agreed.

  “That is no surprise. We all know you much prefer the country life.” Mr. Darcy immediately changed the subject.

  “I shall not deny that; I was never happier than the day we decided to return to Netherfield,” the younger gentlemen said, glancing at a blushing Jane Bennet.

  Elizabeth’s knees slowly weakened as countless questions and puzzles spun in her mind. Mr. Darcy knew Lord Brougham, but surely, that could have no special meaning. He even pretended to forget that they had lunch together, and why would she doubt his words? He surely met many members of the ton every day. It must be a coincidence. There could be no connection between Mr. Darcy, Lord Brougham, and the letter received by her father. Her heart beat faster, but her mind demanded she remain reasonable. A lady's imagination is very rapid; Elizabeth knew that. It jumps from one assumption to another, filling the heart and mind with unreasonable hopes and quickly shattered dreams. She would not allow that!

  The evening progressed slowly, and the discussion became lighter and more animated. Mr. Bingley’s interest towards Jane was now openly displayed, and the lady herself showed no restraint in rewarding him with charming smiles.

  For Elizabeth, time moved slowly. She looked at Mr. Darcy with doubts, wonders, and questions she feared to ask even herself.

  He responded with looks that she now recognized as being uneasy. He was not comfortable either—for one reason or another. He struggled to join the conversation, even forced a smile at times, but his countenance and his eyes betrayed more than his words. Long gazes and stolen glances were mostly the way Elizabeth and Darcy spoke to each other the rest of the evening. Instead of clarifying things between them, some barrier seemed to keep them apart.

  Elizabeth received the announcement of the guests’ departure almost with relief. Netherfield was not far away. She must find a way to speak to him again soon—of what, she did not know yet. But she prayed that a night’s rest would clarify her mind.

  As sleep eluded her, Elizabeth knew there was only one thing to do to regain some peace. She left the room, careful not to awaken Jane, and hurried to the library where she took a piece of paper and wrote hastily.

  Dear Aunt,

  I beg you, as I never did before, to share with me any knowledge you may have on a matter of great importance to me.

  We recently received some news that brought relief to our lives regarding an investor who purchased most of father’s share in that nefarious business. While we are deeply grateful for such solution to our distressing situation, I can find no peace until I discover the truth behind it.

  Do you happen to know more details? Both Papa and I suspect this generous gesture must belong to my dear uncle. If this is true, please confirm it to me, and I promise you my full secrecy. But I feel it is fair for someone in our family to know the true extent of his kindness and to try to repay it. This will not change my feelings for him, though, as I already love both you and my uncle with all my heart.

  Your affectionate niece,

  Elizabeth.

  O
nce she finished it, Elizabeth read the letter again. She felt displeased and guilty for keeping the truth from her aunt and only asking half of her questions. But the reason for her distress and the answer she most wanted she did not dare mention. Eventually, she returned to her chamber, watching Jane smile in some sweet dream.

  When dawn broke the night, sleep eventually took pity on her and wrapped Elizabeth gently, offering a bit of comforting rest to her torment.

  ***

  The following morning, during breakfast and long after, the only subject of conversation was Mr. Bingley’s return, his pleasant figure, and his amiable manners. Mrs. Bennet also recalled Mr. Darcy’s involvement in his friend’s return—as well as his praise of her food—and generously admitted that Mr. Darcy was handsome too and that his manners consistently improved.

  Around noon, unexpected news arrived in the form of an express for Mrs. Bennet. On it, they recognized Lydia’s careless writing.

  “My dear Lydia—I wonder what she has to say so urgent that she sent an express. Mary, tell your father to pay the messenger; of course, Lydia had no money to do so. I will go to the parlour to read it in peace. I wonder what this is about? It must be something very important. My dear girl—could I hope she found a suitor? Or she might be already engaged? And she is only fifteen! Oh, the excitement! I need some biscuits and tea to enjoy my reading. Hill, Hill, where are you?”

  “Mama, may I come with you?” Kitty asked.

  “You may, just try not to cough. I do not want any disturbance. Where is Hill? I need refreshments before I start reading!”

  Elizabeth and Jane smiled at each other and remained in the living room while the other three left together.

  “Lizzy, should we go with Mama too?”

  “I see no reason to do so, Jane. I am sure Mama will lose no time in sharing with us everything she learns. Let us take a walk until then. I need fresh air and a bit of silence.”

  The eldest Miss Bennet gladly accepted. Secretly, both hoped for a chance to speak privately about the previous evening, especially about the gentleman who held their personal interest.

  They took a stroll towards the small grove at the edge of the backyard, and Jane was the first to speak.

  “Lizzy, do you think Mr. Bingley will stay longer?”

  “Longer than what, dearest?” Elizabeth smiled.

  “Do not tease me so. You know what I mean…”

  “Since he had a good reason to return, I doubt he will change his mind again.”

  “He seemed pleased to be here, would you not agree?”

  Elizabeth laughed at her sister’s candour. “Yes, very pleased. And so were you, dearest.”

  “I know you make fun of me, but I shall not stop you. I confess I enjoyed the evening very much.”

  “I do not make fun of you, Jane. I wish nothing more than to see you happy. Your smiles melt my heart.”

  “You are too kind to me, Lizzy. What would I do without you?”

  Their conversation was soon interrupted by a joyful voice calling their names. They turned to see Mr. Bingley hurrying towards them, followed by his friend.

  “Miss Bennet, Miss Elizabeth, what a delightful surprise to see you!” Mr. Bingley declared. Both ladies blushed and received the greetings with gracious courtesy. Elizabeth looked over his shoulder and met a blue gaze smiling at her.

  “It is a delight but hardly a surprise, considering that we came here with the precise purpose of seeing you and we are all in your back garden,” Darcy said. His words brought smiles to the ladies and open laughter to Bingley.

  “It is a surprise for us to see you, gentlemen. And a delightful one indeed,” Elizabeth replied teasingly, repeating Bingley’s words. She briefly noticed the mirth in Darcy’s eyes, and a shiver travelled down her spine.

  Bingley looked at Jane and the glee widened his smile while he tried to explain.

  “We came to thank Mrs. Bennet for a delicious and delightful dinner. We considered writing her a note, but since we were in the neighbourhood, we decided to call on you briefly.”

  “That was very considerate,” Jane replied timidly.

  “It is our pleasure, I assure you. We only hope we are not intruding,” Darcy intervened.

  “No, not at all,” Elizabeth answered more hastily than she intended. “Papa will be happy to see you both. As we are…” she concluded in a lower voice.

  “Excellent! Would you mind if we keep you company?” Bingley inquired.

  “No, not at all,” Jane repeated her sister’s words, blushing and taking a few steps forward. The gentleman was immediately at her side, and they headed towards a small garden with blossoming flowers behind the house.

  Elizabeth and Darcy remained slightly behind, walking side by side so close to each other that their arms could touch—but they did not. However, the mere thought made Elizabeth blush.

  “It is a lovely day. Very fine for a walk,” she said to break the awkward silence.

  “True…there is no chance of being caught in a storm,” he said.

  She laughed, and her face coloured as she remembered a day at Netherfield that seemed lost in the past. Unwilling to allow the conversation to drop, she continued.

  “And even if we should, it is a relief to know there is nobody to criticize us.”

  She heard him breathing more deeply.

  “Yes, criticizing others is an unbecoming trait—for both ladies and gentlemen.” There was a trace of sadness in his voice.

  “Fortunately, some people realize that more quickly than others and adjust their bad habits accordingly.” She blushed at the teasing sound of her own voice. He turned to watch her, but she continued walking.

  “Is Miss Darcy in good health, I hope?” Elizabeth eventually found something else to say.

  “Yes, she is—thank you.”

  “And Colonel Fitzwilliam? Has he returned to his regiment?”

  “Yes, he left London a few days before we did, but he plans to return soon. He prefers London to any other place…unlike me. However, this time, my stay in London was more pleasant than ever before.”

  Her heart beat faster as she struggled to find a reply.

  “And you, Miss Bennet? I imagine you were happy to return home. I know you are not fond of London either.”

  “True…but this time I enjoyed my stay more than before,” she found the strength to respond.

  “I am glad to hear that…”

  They continued walking, reluctant to look at each other. Jane and Bingley were now slowly turning towards the house. Though the gentlemen had arrived only minutes before, time seemed to stand still.

  “Have you seen the Cramptons lately, Mr. Darcy?”

  “No. We hardly meet more than twice a year. We are mere acquaintances despite the connections between our families. I am not a man who enjoys large gatherings.”

  “I imagined as much…about your not enjoying large gatherings. Regarding a connection with the Cramptons, I did not know how well you were acquainted with the family.”

  She paused a little then struggled to gather her courage and to calm her trembling voice as she decided to inquire further.

  “Would it be fair to say that your connection with the Cramptons is similar to that with Lord Brougham?”

  His breathing increased slightly. She stole a glance and observed a stern countenance.

  “Not similar. We are old acquaintances although not close,” he finally answered, his voice cold and severe.

  “I know he is a famous attorney, and few people can claim a personal acquaintance with him. My father received a business proposition from him, which was astonishing.”

  “Yes, Mr. Bennet informed me about the positive solution to his distressing problem and that Lord Brougham was involved in it. I am sorry that both you and he had to endure this distress, but I am pleased it was concluded satisfactorily.”

  She looked at him and gently touched his arm. There was no way to retreat from the subject.

  “Mr. Da
rcy, I cannot go any longer without—”

  “Miss Bennet—” He ceased walking, forcing her to stop too. Their eyes tentatively met and held an instant; then he continued hoarsely.

  “Miss Bennet, I beg you not to speak about Lord Brougham or any other such business. I feel uncomfortable doing so, and I can see it is not easy for you either. I would rather speak about the Cramptons and their party. It was a most fortunate coincidence, and I have congratulated myself many times for accepting the invitation.”

  She swallowed the sudden lump in her throat and nodded in agreement. Her doubts and suspicions, however, grew stronger, slowly becoming certainties. His refusal to discuss the matter was more proof than any statement could be. But she put aside the unanswered questions and responded only to his thrilling confession.

  “I was reluctant to attend as well. But I am glad I accepted…”

  Their gazes met once more, serene and sparkling with joy. Their eyes disclosed what words dared not speak freely, and the heartfelt delight brightened their faces.

  “Lizzy, we should enter the house. Mama is calling,” Jane shouted, and Elizabeth startled; her foot slipped, and she almost fell against Darcy.

  He hurried to help her, his hand grasping her arm tightly. He kept that partial embrace for a moment longer than necessary, and she blushed but remained close to him, enjoying his intoxicating scent.

  They walked to the main entrance, and Elizabeth turned to him once more.

  “Thank you for helping me, sir. Fortunately, there is no mud around, or else I would have been in the same situation as Charlotte at Rosings. Quite amusing, but I would rather not bear your disapproving looks again.”

  His voice became more serious. “I have never looked at you disapprovingly, Miss Bennet. I sometimes misjudged you, or struggled to ignore you. I argued with you and even attempted to take myself far from your presence. But I never disapproved anything in you. Of that, please have no doubt.”

  “I will not. I do not. Starting today…” she whispered.

  There was no time to speak further as, from inside, Mrs. Bennet’s voice cried in anguish, which frightened her eldest daughters and made them race inside. Mrs. Bennet was in a chair—Kitty, Mary, and Hill around her—holding a letter tightly.