Her Colton Lawman

by Carla Cassidy

  While it was nice to have somebody cook for him, he’d be perfectly content if Nina never cooked for him again, as long as she was the first person he saw in the mornings and the person he held as they fell asleep each night.

  He took a long, hot shower and dressed in his uniform, knowing that there were plenty of loose ends that needed to be tied up today after the action last night.

  He also knew that despite the trauma of the night before, Nina would want to go into the diner as usual. At some point he needed to get an official statement from her on exactly what had transpired before he’d pulled Brett off her. He figured he could either go into the diner sometime this afternoon or he could write up a statement that night after dinner.

  Despite the fact that nothing had changed that had plagued him before—Hank Bittard was still on the loose, Jimmy Johnson was hiding out somewhere with the precious Colton ring, the investigation into Gemma’s attack hadn’t advanced and the town was still under quarantine—a new optimism rode in his heart as he entered the kitchen.

  “There’s my hero,” Nina said brightly.

  “And right back at you,” he replied as she pointed him to the table. As he sat she carried a cup of coffee to him. “Something smells delicious.”

  “Cinnamon coffee cake,” she replied. “It should be ready in just a few minutes.” She leaned against the counter and picked up her coffee cup. “Busy day today?”

  “It’s going to be a killer day of paperwork,” he replied.

  “We conducted a lot of interviews last night, and they all need to be typed up. Speaking of paperwork, at some point I need to get a complete statement from you. I can either come into the diner this afternoon, or we can do it this evening after dinner.”

  She set her cup down and opened the oven door. “Why don’t we plan on doing it sometime this afternoon at the diner?” She used two hot pads to remove the coffee cake from the oven and set in on a nearby cooling rack.

  “Works for me,” he said agreeably. “How does around two o’clock sound?”

  “Perfect. That’s always the slowest time in the diner, and we can go back in my office and get it done.” She turned back to the counter and cut the coffee cake. She ladled two large pieces on two plates and then joined him at the table.

  “We’ve still got a ton of people to interview today and tie up all the loose ends concerning Jolene’s murder,” he said.

  “It helped that Brett confessed he killed her in the presence of three witnesses,” she replied.

  “He was even crowing about it later in front of everyone when he was locked up at the station. We won’t have a problem building a case against him not only for Jolene’s murder, but also for kidnapping and attempted murder of you. He won’t see the light of day for years to come.”

  “Success,” she said with a smile.

  “One success, but many challenges ahead,” he replied.

  “I was hoping that on the way to the diner today we could swing by your office and pick up my car.” Her gaze didn’t quite meet his. “I’ve already packed up all my things and have them ready to go.”

  Flint gazed at her, stunned. “Go? Go today? But where do you plan to go? You have no house. It’s silly for you not to stay here.” His heart had begun to beat an unexpected rhythm of dread. He wasn’t ready for this, especially after last night.

  “I’m going to stay in the back room of the diner for a week or two until I find an apartment to rent.” She still refused to meet his gaze. “Flint, we both knew I was only here until the threat to me was removed, and when it was I would be gone.”

  “But what about last night?”

  “Last night was beautiful, but it doesn’t change anything,” she replied.

  “Nina, I don’t want you to be gone.” Flint’s heart felt as if it might beat completely out of his chest. “I want you here, Nina. I want you here always. I’m so in love with you.”

  For the first time since she’d sat at the table, her gaze met his. Her beautiful hazel eyes were filled with pain. “Flint, I told you from the very beginning that I’m not the marrying kind, that I have no intention of being an always kind of woman with a husband and a family.”

  “That’s what your mouth has said, but I don’t believe that’s what your heart is saying,” he replied. “Nina, you were willing to die for a little boy. That’s not a woman who doesn’t want a family. I’ve felt your love for me in a million different ways since you’ve been here with me. You can’t make me believe that you aren’t in love with me.”

  “It doesn’t matter. None of that matters.” She got up from the table. “It’s time for me to move on...alone. It’s the choice I made for myself a long time ago.”

  A hollow emptiness filled Flint, along with a desperation to understand...to change her mind. “But why would you make that choice? You’re a woman meant to be loved, to be cherished, and I know I’m the man to make you happy for the rest of your life. Is this because I’m a cop? Because in your childhood cops let you down? I don’t have to be a cop, Nina.”

  “Don’t be silly. I know you aren’t like those men from my childhood. You were meant to be a lawman, Flint. This town needs you as chief of police.”

  “And you don’t need me?” he asked, aware that he had no dignity left as he faced her. “Trust in me, Nina. Trust in us.”

  Her features closed in, letting him know he could talk himself blue in the face but she’d shut down. Maybe he’d been mistaken about her love for him after all. Maybe he’d only imagined it because he’d wanted it so badly.

  “I’m sorry, Flint,” she finally said.

  He couldn’t force her to be his special woman, not if she didn’t believe it herself. He couldn’t talk her into believing that he was the special man for her, not if she didn’t feel it.

  It was over, and he had to accept that. It certainly didn’t hurt any less. He felt as if he’d spent a long time waiting for the woman who would lift his spirits with her smile, warm his heart with a simple touch and make him laugh when he thought he’d lost the ability. He’d found her and yet he was denied her.

  “Eat your coffee cake,” she said.

  “I’m not hungry.” He shoved the plate aside. “Let’s head out of here. I’ve got a lot of things to attend to today.”

  She pulled his house key from her pocket and set it on the table. “I’ve got my things packed up and by the front door.”

  Flint got up from the table, and within minutes her things were in his trunk, and they were on their way to the police station where her car had been parked since the night she’d witnessed Jolene’s murder.

  They didn’t speak on the way. Flint had nothing more to say, and in any case his aching heart felt too big to talk around.

  Nina stared out the passenger window, apparently disinclined to break the awkward silence as easily as she’d broken his heart.

  When they reached the station he helped her load her things into her car trunk. “Depending on how busy I get today, it might be Patrick who comes to the diner to take your statement,” he said.

  He wasn’t sure he was ready for the awkwardness of sitting with her in her office to take her statement. His utter devastation was too fresh, his heart far too vulnerable.

  “Thank you, Flint, for everything.” Her gaze held his and in their whiskey-colored depths, he could swear he saw regret and the simmer of love.

  False images, he told himself. The wishful thinking of a foolish man in love. “I’m just glad we got the bad guy, and you don’t have to be afraid anymore. Now all I need to do is get Bittard and Jimmy behind bars.”

  She reached out a hand as if to touch his arm, but then dropped it to her side. “You’ll get them, Flint, and with Dr. Colleen Goodhue set to arrive sometime this afternoon, it won’t be long before the town will be back to normal again.”

>   He nodded. “Goodbye, Nina.”

  “I’ll see you later.” She got into her car and after three attempts, finally got it started and pulled out of the parking lot.

  Flint watched until her car disappeared from sight, a hollowness sweeping over him. The town would never be normal to him again. His life would never feel normal without Nina in it.

  With a frown he turned and headed into the station. He had fugitives to catch and the job of keeping peace. That’s what he needed to focus on, and he needed to forget the woman who had captured his heart and then thrown it away.

  Chapter 16

  The first thing Nina did when she left the police station was drive to the discount store where she bought a comfortable bed pillow and a thick blanket for the cot in the storeroom where she would be sleeping until she made other arrangements.

  It felt odd to be out shopping without Flint by her side, and she steadfastly tried to shove thoughts of him and the conversation they’d just shared out of her head.

  Still, his words of love rang through her ears and constricted her heart. The shock on his face when he realized she was leaving, the anguish in his eyes when he’d realized he wasn’t going to change her mind, ripped pain through her.

  She’d never meant for him to fall in love with her, and she’d never meant to fall in love with him.

  Yes, she could admit that she was in love with Flint, but she’d had years of believing she was best off alone, of seeing her future in that way, and her love for Flint didn’t change her mind about her solitary path through life. She’d finally learned to be in control of her own life and the idea of any change terrified her.

  The storage room not only had tall metal shelving for foodstuff and paper goods, but also gray metal lockers where her workers could lock up their personal belongings.

  Besides the cot, there was also a small stall shower, which was rarely used, but would provide her the ability to shower during the time she spent here.

  Charley was the only one at the diner when she arrived and carried her things into the storeroom. He followed her into the room.

  “I heard there was quite a bit of excitement last night,” he said.

  “Enough excitement to last me for the rest of my life, but the good news is Flint arrested Jolene Tate’s killer, so I’m now a free woman who no longer needs to be in protective custody.” She attempted a cheerfulness as she tossed the pillow and blanket on the cot.

  “So, you’re moving in here?”

  She shrugged. “My house was burned to the ground and it was time for me to leave Flint’s, so I figure I’ll bunk here for a while.”

  “Surely Grace or one of the other waitresses would be glad to put you up,” Charley said.

  “I know, but to be honest, I’d rather be here. I need a little alone time to process everything that’s happened to me in the past month. I’ll be fine back here,” she assured him.

  By the time she had stored her things, Grace and Molly had arrived for the morning shift. “I just wanted to let you know that Patrick and I agreed last night to postpone our date on Friday. To be honest, I’m not ready to have Billy out of my sight. If I’d had my way I would have kept him out of school today, but he insisted he had to go because he had to tell everyone what had happened to him. I figured it was best to keep things as normal as possible and let him go.”

  “He’s doing okay?” Nina asked worriedly. The last thing she wanted was for Billy to carry scars from his ordeal through the rest of his life.

  Grace smiled. “He’s probably doing better than any of us. When we got home he wanted a bowl of ice cream, and he told me that even though he was scared as soon as he saw you, he knew you were going to save him, and then Flint saved you and all’s well that ends well.”

  “The offer still stands for me to babysit Billy if you and Patrick change your mind. The only difference is I’d have to watch him at your house instead of at Flint’s. I moved out of there this morning.” Nina refused to acknowledge the squeeze of her heart.

  “Already?” Grace frowned in obvious dismay. “But I had hoped...” She allowed her voice to trail off.

  “There was no hope. There never was any hope,” Nina said firmly. “And now it’s time to get to work and get things ready to open for the day,” she added.

  Surprisingly, there was a brisk morning rush, prompted mostly by people wanting to gossip or find out about what had happened the night before. Parents came in to talk about the fear they’d had for their children, and others came in to listen to their tales.

  Still, no matter how busy she was, no matter how many customers she served and chatted with, she couldn’t stop thinking about Flint and the month she had spent with him.

  There had been an easy magic between them that she knew was rare, but she told herself over and over again that didn’t make it right for her. She was right to let him move on. She had her life here.

  The lunch rush was equally robust, keeping the waitresses running from table to booth to accommodate everyone’s needs. Nina found herself giving a condensed version of what had happened in the woods with Brett over and over again to interested customers.

  The mood in the diner remained positive, as if it didn’t matter what bad guy had been arrested, but only that one had been.

  Nina fought to stay positive, to keep her happy smile in place, but it was an effort. She didn’t understand why following her own path could make her feel so sad inside.

  At two o’clock Patrick showed up to take Nina’s official statement of the events of the night before. They went into her office where it took almost an hour for her to give him a blow-by-blow account of her encounter with Brett.

  Talking about it brought back all the emotions, all the fears she’d experienced while it was happening, and she wished it was Flint taking her statement. Thankfully, she managed to keep control of those emotions.

  When they had finished, Patrick took a seat at a table Grace was serving, and Nina prepared Billy’s after-school treat...a chocolate cupcake and the usual glass of milk.

  When he came through the door she gave him a big hug and then sat at his table with him. “How was school?”

  “Awesome,” he replied and licked the side of his mouth where a dollop of frosting had clung. “I was totally the center of attention. Everyone wanted to know what happened when that man took me into the woods.”

  “And what did you tell them?” Nina asked.

  “I told them that it was scary, and he dragged me around by my coat and talked mean to me, and then you found us and even though you knew that man wanted to hurt you, you made him let me go and told me to run.” His dark eyes gazed at her in obvious hero worship. “I told everybody at school that you were the bravest person in the whole world.”

  “I told you last night, I didn’t feel very brave. I was scared, too, but I didn’t want anything to happen to you.”

  “That still makes you the bravest person in this whole town,” he replied.

  “And you’re still my favorite little man,” Nina replied.

  She visited with him a few more minutes and then left the table so he could get to his homework.

  She sat at the counter and watched Patrick and Grace interact, Grace’s cheeks slightly pink, and Patrick looked animated and engaged.

  She knew exactly what Grace was feeling, the flush of excitement and the flutter of her heartbeat. Nina had felt that way each evening at five o’clock when Flint had walked through the diner door to take her home.

  But this evening there would be no handsome lawman appearing to take her to the house that had felt like home for almost a month.

  There would be no more dinners of light flirting and conversation and laughter, no evenings drinking wine and feeling the simmering sexual tension that was undeniable between them. She would never a
gain know the warmth, the sense of safety, that she’d always felt when his arms were wrapped around her.

  She’d consciously walked away from all of that.

  She was glad when dinner found the diner relatively full, and she kept her focus solely on making sure her customers were well-fed and happy. This was her life, and her staff and the customers were her family, and she continued to tell herself that this was all she needed.

  By the time the diner closed down for the night she was exhausted. She took a quick shower, got into her nightgown and then got beneath the new blanket on the cot.

  A small security light shone on the gray lockers and the hum of the walk-in freezer provided a white noise that should have been soothing, but instead she found it irritating.

  She burrowed deeper beneath the blanket. She’d never felt alone before, but at this moment she felt more alone than she ever had in her life.

  Tears began to seep from her eyes, tears she didn’t understand and couldn’t control. She’d made this choice to leave Flint and his love of her own free will. So, why was she crying?

  She thought of Billy telling her she was the bravest person on earth. She’d faced down a killer to save him. If she was truly one of the bravest people on earth, then why was she so afraid of Flint’s love and of her love for him?

  * * *

  Yesterday had been one of the busiest, the longest and the most painful days Flint had ever endured in his life. There were more interviews to conduct, reports to type up and no matter how busy he stayed, there was a simmer of heartache that ripped at his soul.

  Patrick returned with the report from Nina and as Flint read it, his heart had quickened with the utter terror she must have felt when she first encountered Brett with Billy.

  He’d had Patrick type in the report and then at three-thirty in the afternoon, the only good news of the day showed its face.

  CDC expert Dr. Colleen Goodhue had finally arrived in a large white trailer that hopefully held the specialized equipment and whatever else was necessary for her to find the cure for the Dead River virus.