Only This

by Hadley Quinn

  He wanted to remain where he was because he loved being so close to her, but he took a step back to give her some space. She quickly wiped her face of tears and inhaled another breath of air before she continued. Sarah carefully pulled her far leg over the seat so she was facing him with both feet on the ground.

  “Liv and I were never really that close. She’s a year younger than me but we’re almost complete opposites. She was very outgoing and loved all of the singing and acting my dad put her in. She grew up doing family sitcoms and then some of the teen dramas. She loved it. I was just happy to be there for her if she wanted a sister, but the more she got involved in the limelight, the less important I realized I was to her. I was okay with it. The fame wasn’t my thing and I stayed out of it. She was happy so I was happy, and we just had different lives, really.

  “She got cast in that movie with Max and they started dating. It was a crazy whirlwind of publicity, too, because of who my father was and because Max was a McCallan. The movie was getting so much publicity that it was supposed to top the charts on opening day. I think it did, actually. Anyway, to make a long story shorter, after the movie hype died down, Max broke up with her. She was heartbroken and became depressed. She shut herself off and would barely talk to me anymore. And then she eventually broke down and admitted to me that it was all just a publicity stunt.”

  Sarah shrugged her shoulders and looked at Tyse.

  “What do you mean?” he asked. “What was a publicity stunt?”

  “Max dating her,” she answered. “Them being a ‘couple’,” she used air quotes. “It was all for the sake of making money. She wasn’t supposed to find out, though. She said she overheard Max and his father talking about it.”

  Tyse tilted his head. “You’re fucking kidding me,” he couldn’t help but say. Normally he wouldn’t cuss like that in front of a female, but it just came out.

  “Of course the tabloids went nuts and their breakup was a huge story for a while. My sister had a horrible time with it and became even more reclusive, staying out of the public’s eye. I was furious and wanted to confront everyone myself, but she told me to stay out of it because I would only make it worse. It became too much for her to take. She ended up moving to the East coast to get away from everything, and I haven’t seen her since. She married some guy I don’t even know and I barely hear but a tiny little update about her life maybe once or twice a year.”

  Sarah shook her head at the memories and remained quiet for a few seconds. She was finally opening up to him, but Tyse was afraid of saying the wrong thing to her. He hated feeling like he was walking through a minefield because of his family, but at the same time, he secretly hoped that maybe that’s why he was here. Maybe that’s why the things in Arizona happened and sent him to the west coast. Yeah, he’d discovered he had a family over here, but he most likely wouldn’t have come searching for them if his heart hadn’t been completely crushed by other people.

  Those feelings of loss and emptiness had possibly been the door that needed to be opened for something better.

  “I’m sorry for all you and your sister have been through,” Tyse finally said. “I can’t pretend to know what it was like for you, but I have an idea. What can I do for you, Sarah? What can I do to convince you that I’m not like that?”

  “I don’t know,” she answered softly.

  He took a moment to compose himself and then gently pulled her to a standing position. They were facing each other, but she was looking straight across at his chin.

  “They don’t have my same heart and soul, Sarah,” Tyse replied. He took both of her hands in his. “Look at me please.” She did, almost reluctantly, but he had her attention. “If you can look at me and honestly tell me that you think I’m like them, then I will walk away and never bother you again. I may have the same last name as them, but that means nothing. Look deeper, Sarah. Can’t you see that there’s more to me? It’s all in here,” he said, pulling her hand to his chest. He placed her palm over his heart and held it there. “It is the only thing I know that is leading me right now. All I can say is that there is something about you I can’t explain. I just want a chance to prove I’m right. I won’t let them hurt you. I will do everything in my power to protect you. I will fight for you—I will fight them for you if I have to—but I want you to know I’m on your side no matter what. If you could just…look with your heart, not your eyes.”

  She closed her eyes and a pair of tears pushed down her face. Tyse waited patiently for a response, anything, hoping she would find it in her heart to not shut him out. He believed that she wanted to give him a chance, but he also knew how much easier for her it would be not to.

  “Promise me one thing,” she finally spoke. She looked at Tyse and waited for him to agree, so he nodded his head. Sarah took a deep breath and slowly released it. “I don’t want to be around any of them,” she shook her head. “I don’t want to see any of them, or have to talk to any of them… I don’t want anything to do with them.”

  “Agreed.”

  “But I’m telling you right now that this is going to make tabloids, Tyse. I was already approached by a tabloid reporter the other day, so it’s already begun. It’s only going to get worse, I know it.”

  “I don’t even give a shit what stories people make up.”

  “I don’t either, but I’m sure your family cares and that’s what I’m worried about.”

  “You let me deal with them, okay? This is all I care about. You and me. That’s all that matters. Only this,” he motioned between the two of them. “If there’s something we both want, we should go for it. If we’re both on the same page while we make it happen, the sky’s the limit. Let’s focus on that. Am I worth giving it a chance?”

  He gently wiped the tears from her face as he waited for a response. It was like waiting to hear what your chances for survival were and those few seconds were killing him.

  “What you said earlier—about there being something you can’t explain—I feel that too,” she told him softly. “I really don’t know what it is about you but…” She took another deep breath and exhaled. “Whatever it is…it’s telling me that you’re worth it. As much as I’ve fought it since finding out you’re a—” She paused briefly and swallowed. “I feel in my heart that I should try. In my head it doesn’t make sense because of what I’ve gone through with your family, but in my heart it feels right. That’s all I can say about it.”

  “That’s all I need to hear,” he smiled with relief.

  Now that they’d gotten through that obstacle, the only thing on his mind was kissing her. With all the confusion out of the way, it’s all he wanted to do. He was about to lean forward—

  “There’s one more thing,” Sarah added, almost like she knew what he was going to do and needed to put a stop to it.

  Tyse felt his heart fall just a little bit, but he nodded. “Okay, what’s that?”

  “About some of your family…”

  He narrowed his eyes in question, unsure of what she meant.

  “Your brother and Melanie, Teague and Camryn, Kellie…” she clarified.

  Tyse slowly nodded. “Yeah. What about them?”

  With a sigh she asked, “They’re cool, right? I mean I’ve been told they’re nothing like the other half of the family, but I just want to hear it from you. They won’t be like the others?”

  “No, absolutely not,” Tyse shook his head. “I promise you, they aren’t like that at all. Teague and Jay cut themselves off from that type of garbage long ago, and Kellie has a good heart and would never stoop to a low level either. All of them will give you every ounce of respect and support that you deserve, and they definitely won’t say or do anything unfriendly to you. I can guarantee it.”

  She was barely smiling, like she wasn’t sure if she should believe him. But when she asked, “Jay won’t have an opinion here or there?” he understood her reservation.

  “Jay has a good heart, too,” Tyse chuckled. “Yes it’s true tha
t he says what he feels, but he’s going to support us no matter what.”

  “Are you sure?” she asked with another smile. “He kind of scares me.”

  “Really?” Tyse smiled again. “Well to be honest, he kind of scared me at first, too.”

  “Really?” she laughed.

  “Yeah, really. Not physically, because I can hold my own, but just his personality. I knew a little bit about him when I came this way, so I wasn’t that surprised. But he truly is a good guy, I promise. The only thing you have to worry about is getting used to his personality. He’s blunt, and he might like to joke around with you a little, but he would never say anything to purposely hurt you. And I can guarantee that he’d be right there with me on the front lines if it came to that. I swear.”

  Sarah paused as she glanced away briefly. When she looked at him again, she appeared less worried and a little softer. “Okay,” she said quietly with a tiny smile. “Then…I’ll give you a chance.”

  He smiled too and replied, “Pssh, maybe I’m giving you a chance. You could be turn out to be totally psychotic or…a man.”

  She laughed out loud but said, “You’re right, I could be. I could be both, for that matter.”

  “Hmm, I might have to reconsider this after all… Okay, decision made. I’m willing to risk it.”

  “You sure?”

  “Absolutely.”

  “Totally positive?”

  “One hundred percent, without a doubt, I’d swear on a bible if I had one…positive.”

  She bobbed her head, pretending to consider it. “Okay. Fine.”

  Sarah studied him for a few seconds, even looking into his eyes. Tyse was worried about what she was thinking as she did so, but she ultimately surprised him.

  “So where do we go from here?” she asked softly, her eyes lowering to his lips instead. She returned them to his eyes again and Tyse’s heart began pounding in his chest.

  “I say we kiss on it,” he replied.

  “Kiss on it? Not shake on it?” she seemed to tease.

  “Nope, kiss on it. It’s the only option.”

  “Hmm. Well, okay. I guess if it’s the only option.”

  He didn’t bother to hesitate, and slid his hand behind her neck to pull her close. Her arms wrapped around him cautiously, but once Tyse brushed his lips across hers to test her reaction, her hands pressed against him with more meaning. His heart fervently encouraged him to continue, so he pressed into her lips a little more and began to kiss her.

  He didn’t expect his heart to pound so violently in his chest just from kissing someone, but that’s exactly what it was doing. Tyse knew that she’d been affecting him from the first moment he laid eyes on her, but this was on an entirely new level.

  He pulled away slightly to catch his breath. Sarah kept her eyes closed for a little longer and then opened them. She didn’t move away from him or relay that she wanted to stop kissing him any time soon, but Tyse made the decision to let the moment linger on that note. It was one hell of a first kiss and he chose to keep it that way.

  Tyse kissed her forehead and said, “Let’s get you home, beautiful.”

  Chapter Eighteen

  It took Sarah a long time to fully wake up the next morning. She kept thinking about Tyse and wanted to immerse herself in the memory of his lips on hers as long as she could.

  She would never forget their first kiss. Never in her life had she felt such an intense reaction in her chest before, and it continued to react every time she thought about it.

  She’d been shot with cupid’s arrow.

  “Are you going to get up or just lay there with that stupid smile on your face,” Ali said as she appeared next to her bed.

  “What the hell?” Sarah startled instantly. “How did you get in here?”

  “You need a better lock on your door,” Ali shrugged.

  “You broke into my house?” Sarah mumbled, turning away and burying her face into her pillow.

  “Don’t make out with your pillow, Sarah. I’m sure Tyse is a better kisser than that.”

  Sarah turned onto her back again. “Maybe,” she answered coyly.

  “Maybe?” Ali asked with obvious interest. She dropped onto the bed with a huge grin on her face. “Tell me! Did he kiss you?”

  Sarah sat up but couldn’t help the smile on her face. It had been permanently plastered there for as long as she’d been conscious between last night and this morning.

  “Oh, come on, Sarah,” Ali begged. “Please just tell me. I really like Tyse and I’ll be so super happy if you guys get together!”

  It was a rare occasion that Ali ever cared about her life, and even though Sarah knew the real reason why, she decided it would be okay to share.

  “Yes, he kissed me last night,” she admitted. She explained how most of the date went (minus some of the intense, personal conversations) and said that he kissed her before he took her home.

  “What was it like? Is he a good kisser? I bet he is!” Ali grinned again.

  “Yeah, he is,” Sarah agreed.

  Ali squealed and it made Sarah feel like squealing too. In fact, she almost had after Tyse dropped her off last night and kissed her again, that time longer and a little more passionately than the first time. He wished her goodnight and said he would call her the next day. When Sarah had entered the house, she performed imaginary cartwheels across the room.

  “So what does this mean?” Ali asked. “Are you two officially a couple?”

  That was a good question. Labeling it that way felt odd, almost too soon, and it seemed strange to call Tyse her boyfriend already.

  “I don’t really know,” Sarah shrugged, feeling somewhat silly discussing the issue with her sixteen-year-old neighbor. “We agreed to give it a try, I guess. I don’t know how to classify it.”

  “I classify it as awesome,” Ali smiled. “And yeah, it makes you a couple if you’ve agreed to date.”

  “Well there are different levels of dating for some people,” Sarah told her. “Some like casual dating, where they still see other people.”

  “Did you guys agree to see other people?”

  “No, not exactly. But we didn’t agree to be exclusive, either.”

  “Do you plan on seeing other people?” Ali asked almost knowingly.

  “Well…no, I don’t but—”

  “Then bam, he’s your boyfriend! Congratulations, you’ve landed a McCallan! How exciting, oh my God!”

  Sarah sighed to herself as Alison skipped away for the kitchen. This was pretty much what she feared would happen with Ali and her tendency to revere a certain class of people she deemed to be above the norm.

  Well, Sarah wasn’t going to dwell on it for the time being. She was going to enjoy the simple progress she was gaining with Ali for once.

  And then there was Tyse. Just the thought of him made her smile again, and that alone told her a lot. But just because he triggered her heart to do back flips, it didn’t mean she was going to fall blindly. There was still a very large part of her that feared the worst, and she wasn’t sure if that feeling would ever go away.

  “Okay, I’m ready,” Ali announced as she slid into her backpack. “At least you’re not in a robe with rollers in your hair, I guess.”

  Sarah glanced down at her yoga pants and t-shirt just as she remembered her agreement to take Ali to school that morning. “Whoops, just give me a minute,” she said as she headed for the bathroom.

  “I’ll be in your car, then. First one in picks the music.”

  Sarah only agreed with a smile.

  ***

  “Whoa, you actually drove here?” Rayne observed the second Sarah entered the shop that morning.

  “Ali actually asked me to take her to school today,” Sarah replied as she dropped her purse in the tiny little office in the back.

  Rayne was already organizing a new shipment in the cooler but shut the door and hung her mouth open in mock surprise. “No way. You’re part of the cool kids now?”

 
“I guess so,” Sarah laughed. “But I was glad she asked.”

  “Oh, she seems a little more…interested in your life now, if you know what I mean. Ever since the surprise guests showed up at the bowling alley that night.”

  Sarah rolled her eyes. “Yeah, no kidding, and it makes me nervous. I don’t want her to be friendly and gracious to a select group of people. I know it’s exciting to girls her age, but it just worries me.”

  “Well you heard what Melanie said that night, right? That there will come a point in Ali’s life where she’ll look at things in a different light; there will be experiences in her life that will help her grow. I believe that. It was spot on.”

  “I know,” Sarah nodded. “And I truly believe that too. We all have things we learn from, and it’s different for each of us.”

  The two of them began unloading vases from the box, unwrapping each one from bubble wrap before placing them up in a cupboard.

  “Now tell me about Tyse and last night,” Rayne said with a huge smile. “I’m dying to know how it went!”

  Sarah had actually been looking forward to sharing with Rayne. She could disclose entire conversations and share things that she wasn’t willing to tell Ali. Rayne was over the moon excited about the night and had only positive things to say about it all.

  “I’m telling you, Sarah. Your instincts are dead on. He is such a sweet guy, you are so lucky. You need this, babe. I think you need him.”

  “Even though…” Sarah didn’t really want to talk about Max, but the fact that he was Tyse’s cousin had been the main obstacle this entire time.

  “I think especially because of that,” Rayne told her. “I mean what are the fucking odds? Seriously! I have no idea why or how all of this came together like it did, but it’s truly fate. I’m not kidding.”

  “Or maybe it’s just a test to see if I learned from watching my sister crash and burn because of that family,” Sarah complained dryly. She wasn’t sure if she fully believed that, but she felt it was a legitimate concern.

  “Exactly, maybe it is a test,” Rayne narrowed her eyes smugly. “A test for you to realize you can’t judge a person by their last name, Sarah Noelle Douglas.”