Empress Bianca

by Lady Colin Campbell

  Bianca continued to play with the shahtoosh shawl the whole way to Andorra in case the pilot should notice what rings she was wearing; and when she arrived at the bank and took the elevator up to the apartment, she made sure that at no time was her right hand visible to the surveillance cameras.

  Once in the apartment, she headed straight for her husband’s bedroom, where Eli and Agatha were on duty. She greeted them as if this were just another visit on just another ordinary day. She crossed over to the sleeping Philippe and gently kissed him on the cheek, still twirling the shahtoosh around her right hand, for Bianca was only too aware how absolutely vital it was that no one should catch sight of the fact that she had entered the Banco Imperiale Headquarters Building without the sapphire ring that Agatha had slipped into Eli’s pocket.

  Having set the stage, Bianca now needed to get her accomplice away from it, so she said: ‘Agatha, could you please get me a glass of iced tea? But I don’t want one of those bottled jobs that Lipton’s makes. I want you to make me a proper cup of tea, then put ice and lemon and sugar in it. Is that understood?’

  ‘Madame,’ the nurse replied humbly.

  As soon as Agatha had gone out into the passage Bianca left Eli alone in the bedroom with Philippe and went into the bathroom. Once there, she urinated, making sure to do so loudly enough for the surveillance team to pick up what she was doing on the monitors. She then took her engagement and wedding rings off her finger, placed them loudly on the marble counter of the basin before picking up the engagement ring alone, this time dropping it into the basin with a real clatter so that the surveillance team would conclude from the sounds she was making that she had removed three rings. Then she said, for the benefit of the audiotape: ‘That blasted sapphire is nothing but a wretched nuisance.’

  Next she turned on the taps, which were not of the golden variety so favoured by the nouveaux riches but were sedate burnished steel of the highest quality, specially made by a firm in Italy to her specifications. She then washed her hands at a leisurely pace, taking care to leave the rings on the side of the basin, and, after drying her hands, returned to her husband’s room to sit by his bed. Philippe stirred.

  ‘Hello, my darling,’ Bianca said as she bent over to soothe his brow.

  Philippe muttered something that she did not understand.

  ‘I’ll turn Monsieur,’ Eli said. ‘It will make him more comfortable.’

  ‘Thank you,’ Bianca said. ‘Maybe he’ll go back to sleep for a bit.’

  ‘He’s been sleeping much better now that he has those new drugs from Dr Wiseman,’ Eli informed her to her annoyance, as if she needed him to tell her what she could see for herself.

  ‘I know. I detect an improvement in his concentration too,’ Bianca said sweetly.

  ‘I can’t agree, Madame. I’ve never seen him so befuddled as in the last few weeks, not even when he had those tablets which disagreed with him.’ Eli’s contradiction reinforced Bianca’s conviction that she was right to get rid of him. ‘Well,’ she said evenly, enjoying setting the trap for an adversary who did not even know he was prey, ‘we can’t expect miracles, Eli. There have to be times when he’s a bit spaced out from all the drugs Dr Wiseman’s giving him to keep him alive. No?’

  ‘True,’ he said.

  ‘And I still maintain I see an improvement in his concentration now that Dr Wiseman has changed his regimen,’ Bianca replied as Eli finished settling Philippe.

  ‘Oh, Eli, can you do me a favour?’ she said lightly when he had done so. ‘I’ve left my rings in the bathroom. Please fetch them for me.’

  The helper headed for the bathroom and into the trap. He returned with Bianca’s wedding ring and ‘everyday’ diamond engagement ring: a 32.6 white emerald-cut diamond set in platinum which Harry Winston had sold Philippe on their third wedding anniversary. ‘You only need look at Mama’s left hand to see whether she has you rated as Grade A, B or C,’ Pedro once observed, neatly summarizing how Bianca ranked people socially, ‘Or whether you’re even no category at all, which is when she shows up in her “every day” engagement ring.’

  ‘Thank you,’ Bianca said sweetly, slipping the rings onto the wedding finger of her left hand. Then she extended her right hand and wagged the ring finger at Eli.

  He stood there, puzzled, wondering what the hell was going on.

  ‘Come on Eli, I’m too old for these games,’ Bianca said.

  Philippe stirred and tried to sit up.

  Eli moved to help him up.

  ‘What’s happening?’ Philippe asked.

  ‘Eli’s playing a little game with me, which I’m not sure I like,’ Bianca said through gritted teeth.

  ‘I don’t know what you mean, Madame,’ Eli said, rearranging the sheets around his employer.

  ‘I asked you to get my rings, by which I meant all three of them. Will you please go and get me my sapphire ring when you’ve finished with Monsieur?’

  A look of bewilderment passed over Eli’s face as he finished tucking Philippe in. Having done so, he ambled into the bathroom, perplexed at how he could have missed the ring. He looked for it. It was nowhere to be seen. Confounded, he surmised that it must have fallen off the counter. He got down on his hands and knees to look for it on the floor. Then he sensed another presence in the room.

  Looking up, he saw Bianca standing in the doorway, her hand on her hip, her ring finger flashing at him ominously.

  ‘It doesn’t seem to be anywhere, Madame. Are you sure you wore it?’

  ‘I’m positive, Eli,’ she said.

  ‘It doesn’t make sense.’

  ‘Let’s not worry about it, Eli,’ she continued neutrally. ‘We have a superb security team. Erhud will be sure to find it, wherever it’s got to.’ With that, she crossed to the telephone beside her husband’s bed. She picked up the receiver and rang Erhud Blum’s extension. ‘Can you come up, please?’

  The head of security literally ran up the stairs and into the bedroom, almost knocking over Agatha, who was returning with Bianca’s glass of iced tea on a silver tray. ‘My sapphire ring’s gone missing,’ she said. ‘I had it on when I arrived. I sent Agatha downstairs to make me some proper ice tea, left Eli with Monsieur when I went to the bathroom, took off my rings when I was in there to wash my hands, forgot them, came out, asked Eli to go back in and get my rings. He returned with only my engagement and wedding rings but not the sapphire. He says he can’t find it, so we need your skills.’

  ‘Will everyone stay where they are?’ Erhud said, a worried look furrowing his brow, as he headed into the bathroom to examine it himself. Of course, the ring was nowhere to be seen. Estimating that it must be worth hundreds of thousands - if not millions - of dollars, he carefully scoured every surface, opened every drawer and went down on his hands and knees before satisfying himself that it had not fallen on the floor. He then looked a second time in the drawers, and when he still could not find it he walked back to the bedroom. ‘Madame, are you sure you took it off in the bathroom?’ he asked, confident that Eli could not have stolen the ring.

  ‘I’m positive,’ Bianca replied serenely.

  With that assurance, Erhud returned to the bathroom and pulled out every drawer. He tipped out the entire contents of each drawer himself, rifling through every item and looking into the structure of the furniture to see if it had got stuck between a drawer and the furniture. Only when he had satisfied himself that the ring had not been hidden or fallen anywhere in the bathroom, did he go back into the bedroom.

  ‘Madame, I’m sorry, but…’ Erhud started.

  ‘You can’t find it. Well, there’s only one thing left for you to do. You must search us before calling in the plumbers to see if it got knocked into the drain.’

  ‘Search you, Madame?’ Erhud asked, as if Bianca had suggested something so incredible that he had not heard correctly.

  ‘Yes, of course you must search me. You surely don’t think that I’d want you searching any employee of ours without first submittin
g myself to the same procedure, do you, Erhud?’

  Before the words were properly out of her mouth, Bianca stretched out her arms, with her legs apart. ‘You can search everywhere except the feminine regions. Agatha will do those for you, in your presence,’ she said, as if this were an unnecessary process which would never yield results from either herself or Eli.

  Seeing the sense in Bianca’s thinking, Erhud searched her. Then it was Eli’s turn. He presented himself with less alacrity than she had done, his sense of dignity offended by this procedure. Nevertheless, he had to follow Bianca’s example, so he stood facing the Head of Security with legs astride and arms outstretched.

  Erhud flashed Eli a look of apology then brushed down the male assistant’s arms and inside his legs before patting his way down the outside of his body. Suddenly, he hit something. ‘Those are my keys,’ Eli said and pushed his hand into his pocket.

  ‘Don’t do that,’ Erhud ordered briskly.

  Eli pulled his hand out of his pocket quickly. Without waiting a moment, Erhud pushed his own hand into the pocket and removed its contents. Sure enough, there was a set of keys - but also Bianca’s sapphire ring.

  Having been woken up by the commotion, Philippe had been witnessing this scene with growing dismay. Now he started to cough and splutter. ‘I don’t understand this,’ Eli said. ‘It doesn’t figure.’

  ‘Madame, this is a matter for the police,’ Erhud said, ignoring him.

  ‘I think not,’ she responded authoritatively. ‘That would only upset my husband and, whatever his faults, Eli has been very good to Monsieur.

  But,’ she continued, turning to face the unfortunate assistant, ‘I want you on the next flight out of Toulouse. I don’t care where you go, but you’re to leave the principality today, and you must never return. If you do come back, I promise you, I’ll press charges and have them throw away the key. Save the surveillance tapes, Erhud, in case we need to use them.’

  ‘Madame, I don’t know what happened…’ Eli started to say.

  Bianca cut him off. ‘I do. Your greed got the better of you. I forgive you, but I never want to see your face again. Oh, and incidentally, Eli, you won’t be getting any severance pay. I don’t believe in rewarding people who take advantage of my husband’s kindness. Please see him out, Erhud.’

  Erhud stepped up to Eli and grabbed him by the arm to carry out Bianca’s order.

  ‘Eli,’ Philippe spluttered. ‘I want to say goodbye to Eli.’

  ‘Let him,’ Bianca said sweetly.

  Eli crossed over to the bed, where Philippe was sitting up, his eyes filled with tears. ‘I’m going to miss you, Eli,’ he rasped.

  ‘I’m going to miss you too, Monsieur. I’m sorry things have ended like this. I hope you believe me when I say that I don’t understand how that ring got where it did. It must have fallen off the bathroom counter into my pocket when I went to fetch Madame’s other rings.’

  ‘I’m sure it did,’ Philippe said, patting his favourite male assistant’s hand with his shaking ones.

  ‘God bless you, Monsieur,’ Eli said, kneeling beside Philippe.

  ‘You too, Eli. You’re a good boy. You’ve been good to me, and it’s been a real pleasure having you here.’

  ‘For me too, Monsieur,’ Eli said, as Bianca motioned to Erhud to move him along.

  Erhud stepped beside Eli and nudged him to stand up.

  Eli turned to face Bianca. ‘Thank you, Madame, for not calling the police. The disgrace would’ve been more than my family could bear. You must believe me when I tell you that I didn’t take your ring.’

  ‘Eli, if it makes you happier to hear me say I accept that there might well be another explanation for what happened, I’ll say it. But there’s no way we can keep you here after what’s happened today. You do understand, I hope.’

  ‘God bless you too, Madame. You’re a good woman, and I wish you a long life and health.’

  ‘You too, Eli,’ Bianca said benevolently. Then Erhud gripped him by the arm and frogmarched him out of Philippe’s bedroom as the old man broke out into loud sobs.

  As soon as Eli had been escorted off the premises, Bianca was on the telephone to Mary van Gayrib in New York, getting her out of bed. She recounted the tale of how Eli had been caught stealing her sapphire ring then said: ‘Find another male helper and make sure this time that he’s honest. He doesn’t have to be bright. In fact, he can be dumb as they come. But he has to be honest. I’d prefer one of those country bumpkins who are new to town or an out-of-towner who hasn’t been polluted by the sophistication of New York City the way Eli was. Those city slickers are a bit too streetwise for comfort, and I don’t want Philippe going through what he’s just been through again.’

  ‘I’ll get on the case right now,’ said Mary.

  ‘Goodness,’ Bianca then emoted, as if she were surprised. ‘I’ve just realized the time. I am so sorry to have called you so early. I fear I got quite carried away in the heat of the moment.’

  ‘I understand,’ Mary said. ‘It’s important that we replace Eli as soon as possible. I don’t mind. Really, I don’t.’

  ‘You’re a star,’ Bianca said warmly. ‘I don’t know what we’d do without you, my friend.’

  ‘Let me see what I can come up with,’ Mary said.

  Two hours later she telephoned Bianca to inform her that she had found a replacement from her pool of rejected interviewees. ‘He’s a very personable guy. From London. Ontario. Born in 1962. He’s married with three kids, all adopted. He was a Royal Canadian Mounted Policeman until he was invalided out with a defective ankle. He moved to Long Island last year to be near his wife’s mother, who had a stroke and has since died. When I interviewed him four months ago, I thought he had too much family baggage and might come to regret working in Andorra.’

  ‘What sort of person is he?’

  ‘If you mean, does he have street smarts like Eli, the answer’s “no”. But he is like Eli in that he wears his heart on his sleeve. He told me the first time around the reason why he wanted the job was that the family had gotten itself into a financial hole as a result of his mother-in-law’s illness. His wife had to stop working, and they were mortgaged up to the hilt. I just hung up from him. He says their financial plight is even worse than it was before, though his wife has started working again. In other words, he’s keener than ever to take the job.’

  ‘How long does he want to come for?’

  ‘For the full six months. He seemed thrilled when I told him that we’d fly his family to France for a week’s vacation at the end of his contract if he gives satisfaction. I think that perk, together with the salary of $750 a day, is what has him chomping at the bit.’

  ‘You’re sure he doesn’t have the smarts to devise the same sort of plan that Eli did?’ asked Bianca, sounding terribly, terribly concerned.

  ‘To be frank, Bianca, he looks a bit of a loser. The sort who’s a little bit too soft for his own good.’

  ‘How does that square with him being a Mountie?’

  ‘You’ll see what I mean when you meet him. He’s all heart and muscle. But I don’t think he’d challenge Donald Duck in the brains department.’

  ‘Well,’ Bianca said, careful to sound just the right side of doubtful but secretly optimistic that he might serve her purposes, ‘if you think he’ll do, I’ll rely on your judgement.’

  ‘He says he can be in France on Wednesday. Will that be OK?’

  ‘Yes. We’ll just have to manage as best we can till then.’

  In the days between Eli’s departure and Frank Alderman’s arrival, Bianca implemented the next phase of her operation with an efficiency and a resolve that would have impressed Philippe, had he known about it and had he not been the intended target.

  His will, unchanged since the early days of their marriage, left his widow two thirds of his estate with the final third being divided between his brother and two sisters. Bianca had always shied away from confronting Philippe about changing it becau
se he was so devoted to his siblings. Her viewpoint was that Philippe’s fortune would never have been the size it was, had it not been for her contribution in the form of the Piedraplata fortune and the opportunities that that had given him, together with her social skills and the cachet being her husband also provided. ‘Without me,’ she rationalized, not without a degree of merit, ‘he might now be worth $40,000,000 or $50,000,000 at a push. So any sum in excess of that left to his family, or anyone else for that matter, is money that should rightfully be coming to me.’

  Bianca had long since resolved that, when the time came, she would do all in her power to have Philippe alter his will to reflect what she regarded as her rightful share of his fortune. Well, the time had come. Philippe must change his will and provide her with what was rightfully hers.

  Knowing that he would never do so willingly, however, she now set about rectifying what she perceived as an injustice. She waited until Philippe was reasonably lucid, early one afternoon five days after Eli had left. ‘Darling,’ she said, ‘I’ve had an idea. Knowing how devout you are, I thought a worthy testament to your accomplishments, character and love for our people would be for me to endow a College of Jewish Studies in your name after your time comes. What do you think?’

  ‘It’s a wonderful idea,’ Philippe said, the light of gratitude and love burning in his eyes.

  ‘Would you prefer the college to be at Yale, Harvard or Tel Aviv …indeed, anywhere else you can think of?’