A Kiss for Christmas

by Melody Grace

Emerson regards Daniel with a threatening stare. “Sure. Nice. Thanks.”

  “No problem, man,” Daniel regards him coolly. “Happy to help out.”

  There’s a tense silence, the two guys staring each other down, and I remember what Juliet told me about the last time these guys met face-to-face: how it ended with an all-out bloody brawl.

  Way to ruin the wedding, Lacey!

  Finally, Daniel sets down his cup. “I should hit the road,” he says, leisurely, as if he has all the time in the world.

  “Don’t let us stop you.” Emerson agrees. Juliet rolls her eyes at him, and moves forwards to give Daniel a hug.

  “Thank you again for getting Lacey here. I don’t know what I would have done without her.”

  “I didn’t do it for you,” Daniel gives her a crooked smile, then looks past her to me. “Lacey, you take care.”

  My heart twists. This is it, he’s leaving. After everything that’s happened, I want to throw my arms around his neck and make him stay somehow; at the very least, taste one last bittersweet kiss.

  I fight the urge, with everything I have. There’s no use humiliating myself now, when he’s made himself perfectly clear.

  “Sure, you too,” I murmur, looking away. There’s a pause, then Daniel pulls on his jacket. “Good luck, to the both of you,” he tells Emerson and Juliet, and holds his hand out for Emerson to shake. After a beat, Emerson takes it. “Take care of her,” Daniel says quietly, and it makes the knife twist harder—that even after all their drama, he can still be a good man about it.

  Emerson nods, solemn. “With my life.”

  I busy myself with dishes at the sink, keeping turned away until I hear the front door shut and Daniel’s engine start up in the yard. There’s a pause, while I scrub hard at a breakfast bowl, tears stinging the corner of my eyes. Then Juliet’s voice comes, loud and clear.

  “You want to tell me what just happened here?”

  Lacey

  I brush off Juliet’s question, turning back to her with a bright smile. “Nothing, I don’t know what you mean. Now, where do you want to get started: out in the yard, or in here?”

  “Lacey …” Juliet gives me a knowing look, but I refuse to crumple and make even more drama out of my own damn stupidity.

  “The yard it is,” I decide. “That way we can get the heavy lifting done before we change. You stay inside and keep warm, but send me whoever you have free.”

  Juliet opens her mouth to protest, but she’s drowned out by the clatter of activity in the hall as Emerson’s groomsmen arrive in a hustle of hunky manliness: Hunter, Brit’s fiancé, tall and blonde and strapping, and their friend, Garrett, looking surprisingly smart with his usual wayward stubble shaved, and a suit instead of his uniform plaid shirt and jeans.

  “Perfect timing!” I declare, greeting them with hugs. “We’ve got some serious work to do!”

  I manage to keep away from Juliet’s questions for the next few hours as I slip into full event-planning mode. With Garrett and Hunter at my disposal, the mess inside the house and out is cleared away into closets and the garage, and we set up a small row of white folding chairs in the back yard, leading up to an archway I wind with holly, winter wreaths, and red and white ribbons. I hang tiny lanterns and twinkling white Christmas lights on the tree branches and fence, and in no time at all, the back yard looks like a glittering, snow-swept Christmas card scene.

  The activity is good for me: with so much to do, I can almost force the thought of Daniel out of my mind.

  Almost.

  But as hard as I try, I can’t stop the memories slipping into my mind. Flashes of him kissing me, holding me, our bodies intertwined …

  “It looks great out here.” Emerson’s voice breaks through my X-rated thoughts. I jolt back to reality to find him leaning out from the back porch, a mug of coffee in his hands.

  “Yup!” I exclaim brightly. “It’s all going to be perfect.”

  Focus, Lacey, I scold myself. This isn’t about you: today is Juliet’s day, not the time for your own stupid emotional drama.

  “They need you upstairs, something about makeup …” Emerson adds. “I don’t even know but Brit sounds about ready to kill someone.”

  “Coming!” I call, checking around one last time. There’s a wonderful hush that’s fallen over the bay with the snowfall: the world is white and gray and silver, with nothing but the distant sound of the ocean crashing on the pale shore. It’s magical, like another world, and for a moment I can’t help wishing Daniel could be back here to share it with me.

  Keep dreaming.

  I swallow back my foolish dreams and hurry back into the warm house and upstairs.

  “I’m here, I’m here!” I proclaim brightly, looking around the bedroom Juliet has commandeered as Bride Central.

  “Finally!” Brit smothers me with a hug. Her choppy hair has a bright pink streak in it to match her short, frothy silk dress — one of her own designs, I’ll bet. “You better sit down,” she adds, looking me up and down and reaching for a makeup kit. “We don’t have much time if I’m going to fix all of … this.”

  “So where’s the VIP?” I ask, settling in a chair.

  “In here!” Juliet’s voice comes, muffled from behind the bathroom door. “Wait a sec … OK, I’m coming out. Promise not to laugh,” she adds, a tremor in her voice.

  The door opens, and she emerges: a vision in white.

  “Oh my god,” I breathe, taking it in. Juliet’s dress is a simple column of silk with a strapless neckline and a long, flowing skirt that pools out behind her. Tiny pearls are embroidered along the princess neckline, and Brit rushes forwards to help fix a long veil to her hair, spilling down her back in a swoop of delicate lace.

  “Is it OK?” Juliet twists, anxious.

  “It’s perfect.” I promise.

  “You’re perfect,” Brit agrees.

  I swallow, feeling tears again. “I can’t believe you’re getting married!”

  “Me either!” Juliet chokes up, reaching for me in a hug.

  “No crying!” Brit orders us. “You’ll smudge your makeup!”

  “OK!” Juliet sniffles, hugging me.

  I’m suddenly hit with the truth. For years, Juliet has been my person, the one constant in my life; but now, she’ll belong to someone else. To Emerson.

  And I’ll be alone.

  The emotions of the day are finally too much: I break down into loud, messy sobs. I’m trying so hard to keep it together, but something inside has broken wide open and I can’t keep it in anymore.

  “Lacey?” Juliet gasps. “What’s wrong?”

  “It’s nothing!” I choke, embarrassed. “I’m sorry, ignore me!” I try to get myself under control, but the tears keep coming. The others are looking at me like I’m crazy, and I know I must be making a mess of my makeup, but I can’t help it, it hurts too much. My heart’s been aching all day long, beating out a miserable song, and with the wedding looming, just hours away, it can’t take it anymore. Everyone here has someone: their lover, their partner, their friend. And as much as I’ve tried to deny it, I can’t avoid the truth.

  I wanted Daniel to be my someone. I want it so, so bad.

  “Give us a minute?” Juliet asks Brit over my head.

  I try and protest through the tears, but Brit sends me a sympathetic smile “I’ll go make sure the guys haven’t rolled in the snow,” she say, quietly closing the door behind her. Finally, we’re alone.

  I sniffle, feeling like the worst kind of buzz-kill. This is her special day, and me and my ugly sobs are ruining it. Juliet finds a box of tissues on the dresser, then sits beside me on the bed, carefully smoothing out her dress. “What’s going on, Lace?” she asks softly, taking my hand.

  “Nothing,” I shake my head, tears still streaming down my face. “I promise. I’m fine.”

  “Sure you are. This is what you always look like when you’re deliriously happy.” Juliet smiles at me softly.

  I choke out a laugh, but I
can’t tell her, I just can’t. BFF exes are off-limits, it’s like one of the most sacred girl-code rules there is, and I not only went and broke it, I danced around on the smashed pieces like there was no tomorrow.

  Juliet rubs my back gently and waits. “Is it about Daniel?” she finally asks.

  My head snaps up in shock. “How did you …?” I trail off, realizing too late that I’m totally busted.

  Juliet gives me a smile. “I had a hunch. The way you two were trying so hard not to look at each other …” she lets out a breath, cautious. “Did something happen?”

  I nod, miserable. “I’m sorry,” I say again, “I know I’m the worst friend in the world. We were snowed in, and we started doing shots, and one thing led to another …”

  I stop.

  “No, that’s not the truth,” I say quietly. If I’m going to be honest, I need to come clean — about everything. “The truth is, I’ve always liked him. Even when you guys were dating. And when we wound up together last night … I couldn’t help it. I know I should have stopped, but, I wanted him too much.”

  I brace myself, waiting for Juliet’s confusion and disappointment. But nothing comes. The silence stretches. I finally break, forcing myself to peek over at her. I catch my breath: she doesn’t look mad. “Do you hate me?” I ask in a small voice.

  “No!” Juliet exclaims, looking thoughtful. “I just … I never knew, that’s all.” She pauses again, processing. “So last night …?”

  “I thought it might mean something, to him too. I know it was stupid,” I add quickly, “And this is probably, like, my karmic punishment, but, I couldn’t help it. It’s him, Jules,” I say, miserable. “It’s always been him.”

  “Aww, babe.” Juliet hugs me again, and I fall against her, my heart aching in my chest. Admitting it out loud makes it all real somehow. I love Daniel, and now I’ll never have him. That one night was all I’ll get; hell, now I’ll probably never see him again.

  “I’m sorry,” I say again, because I am: for letting her down, and for getting my own foolish hopes up, for thinking that anything real could happen. For making any part of this day about me.

  “Don’t be,” Juliet says firmly. She looks at me intently, “I mean it, I just want you to be happy. Both of you, and if it’s with each other—”

  “That’s never going to happen.” I cut her off. “He couldn’t have made it clearer. This was just a stupid one night thing. He doesn’t want to be with me. Why would he?”

  “Don’t even say that.” Juliet orders. “You’re amazing, you know that, and if he’s too dumb to see it, that’s his problem.” She looks so fierce that for a moment, I think she’s going to go marching off through the snow in her wedding dress to give Daniel a piece of her mind.

  I manage a laugh. “I love you,” I tell her.

  “And I love you too,” Juliet smiles, looking anxious. “I’m sorry you’re hurting, I really am.”

  “It’s OK, I’ll live.” I give her a weak smile. “Now, enough sitting around, being miserable. Are you going to help me get fixed up for the wedding of the year— no, make that, the century?”

  Juliet makes that sympathetic face again.

  “Don’t look at me like that!” I exclaim quickly. “I feel great. Awesome! Ready to get you down the aisle. But first, this pretty face of mine is going to need serious work.”

  “Dunk your head in cold water,” Juliet advises me. “I’ll call the others up. Don’t worry, she adds softly, “You’ll be just fine.”

  My heart catches. I nod, “I know.”

  But know it’s a lie. I won’t be fine, not without him. And he’s not mine to have. He never was.

  “Come on, babe,” I swallow back the pain, and put my best face on. “Let’s get you married.”

  Daniel

  I make it as far as the gas station by the freeway entrance before I have to pull over. It’s crazy. I need to keep driving, and make it to the airport to catch a flight home, but every instinct in my body is screaming to turn around and go right back to Beachwood Bay.

  To Lacey.

  Damn.

  I hit the steering wheel in frustration. What the hell am I doing? It was one night, just one night I spent with her.

  One night that changed everything.

  I sink back and close my eyes with a sigh. Right away, I see her: running for the flight, hair shimmering in the neon lights, her smile, so wide and breathless. Her body, like a goddamn miracle.

  I can’t get her out of my head.

  I don’t know how it happened, but now, she’s all I can think about. Even back at the beach house, seeing Juliet for the first time since everything went down, I didn’t care. All I could care about was Lacey.

  Something was wrong, I knew it even on the drive up. The way she avoided my gaze, staring out the window, carefully moving around me, so we wouldn’t even accidentally touch. I wanted to ask, to see if I’d done something wrong, but somehow, I couldn’t find the right words. Maybe she just felt awkward, being stuck with me long after she’d usually make her morning-after escape. After all, one night flings aren’t supposed to stick around the next day like I did.

  That was it, I tell myself. She just wanted to get away from me and forget the whole thing ever happened.

  But what if you’re wrong …?

  The possibility slips into my mind and shimmers there, too bright to ignore. If I’ve read this all wrong, if Lacey might be open to seeing where this could go … Hell, I don’t need a promise from her, I’d settle for a single date: any chance I get to make her see I’m not the boring, straight-laced guy she thinks I am. That I can make her happy, treat her like the queen she really is.

  Love her the way she deserves.

  It’s crazy. I should feel wrecked, seeing the girl I used to love so happy to be marrying someone else, but the strange thing is, I didn’t feel a thing: looking at Juliet was like a memory from a different life, like I was someone else when I was with her, and now, that moment is gone. Juliet is my past, but Lacey …?

  She could be my future.

  It’s a chance. The smallest, slimmest, craziest chance in the world, but even that tiny piece of hope is enough. It’s everything.

  Before I know what I’m doing, I put the car in drive and spin a U-turn in the parking lot, the wheels screeching in protest. I head back on the coastal highway—heading the exact direction I just came from.

  To Beachwood Bay. To Lacey.

  I’m going to make her mine.

  Lacey

  By three, everything’s ready. The backyard looks perfect, Juliet is dressed, and the rest of the guests have arrived and are taking their seats out back, wrapped in extra blankets and scarves. It’s a small group, just friends from town, and close family, but as the clouds finally part and shine crisp winter sunshine down on the snowy scene, I know, it’s everything Juliet and Emerson wanted.

  Everyone they love, right here, to share in their happiness.

  “All set?” Brit asks, pulling on a long, fake-fur cape. She’s standing as a bridesmaid, and has a bouquet of white roses, with fur lined boots on her feet. Hunter comes in from the other room to collect her, his eyes softening at the sight of her.

  “You look beautiful,” he murmurs quietly, and her cheeks flush pink.

  “You look pretty dapper yourself.” Brit adjusts the lapel of his tux, and they share a look so full of love and passion, I have to look away.

  “All set,” I busy myself with my own wrap, ignoring the lump in my throat. “You get everyone settled, we’ll be out in a minute.”

  They head outside, and I’m left alone in the foyer for a minute. I catch sight of my reflection in the mirror, and have to wince at the grim expression on my face.

  Quit moping! I order myself. You’re happy for her, so try and look it!

  I plaster a bright smile on my face and open my mouth to call Juliet down, but then I catch sight of something in the drive that makes the words die in my throat.

  Daniel.r />
  My heart skips a beat as I watch him leap out of the car and stride up the front steps, looking deadly determined. He throws open the door then stops in surprise, just inches away from me.

  God, he’s gorgeous. I stare at him, at those deep amber eyes, and feel a wave of longing crash through me so powerful, I have to reach out a hand to steady myself on the bannister. But what the hell is he doing back here? My mind races, and then I realize.

  Oh.

  “You can’t …” I stutter, looking frantically around. “She chose him, Daniel, you can’t stop the wedding now—”

  “What are you talking about?” Daniel frowns at me in confusion.

  “Juliet,” I breathe, my voice weak. “You came back for her.” I swallow, my voice wavering with a treacherous hint of hope. “Didn’t you?”

  Daniel takes a step closer, and then another, his gaze fixed on mine. My breath stills as he reaches to cup my face in his hand, gently tracing my jaw.

  What the …?

  Daniel slowly shakes his head, leaning closer. “It’s you, Lacey,” he whispers. “I came back for you.”

  I don’t understand.

  I blink at him, wordless, unable to process what he’s just said. It can’t be; this is some kind of game. A trick. He can’t mean it.

  He can’t want me.

  Daniel’s smile slips. “Unless …” He gulps, looking panicked. “Shit, I’m sorry, I didn’t know if you wanted …” He backs away. “I got this all wrong.”

  He reaches for the door to leave as I stay frozen. And for a terrible split-second, I can’t say a word, I just watch him walk away.

  Let him go. A small voice orders me. Because a man like that could never want you, not really. He’d get tired of you, bored, annoyed. You would wreck this, somehow, and wouldn’t it be worse in the end, hurting him? Letting yourself down. Trying, and failing to be the perfect girl he deserves.

  The chorus of insecurity rages in my head, but something else calls, louder. My heart: beating for him, aching for him all these years. The peace I felt in his arms last night, so safe and treasured and enough.